Toilet Talk

[Shady]

Wonder if you can use that on old people??

 

[Swifty]

That would probably fall under a respecting the dignity of the elderly law .. but technically, I can't see why not.

 

[Gizmos Mama]

I couldn't find a fart specific thread, (mods, move as you see fit), so into the communal bowl it goes! because this is too good not to post somewhere.

I'm not much for fart jokes, but this had me in hysterics! Enjoy!

http://www.unilad.co.uk/video/dude-records-the-most-beautiful-fart-of-all-time/

 

[Swifty]

This charming site has been up for over ten years now .. feel free to admire pictures of other people's poo and if you're especially proud of one of your own, you can upload a pic of it .. it's surely what the internet was invented for ..

Rate My Poo

http://www.ratemypoo.com/

.. this one's my current favourite, I gave it a solid 10

Spoiler

 

[Swifty]

£2,500 to seemingly crap in a bucket ... but in style (our downstairs cistern is rubbish anyway hence the shopping around today) .. it's certainly a conversation piece when you have guests around ..

http://www.beautifultoilets.com/TRTC-Wooden-Throne-Toilet-p/toitrtc11.htm?1=1&CartID=0

 

[Heckler]

View attachment 4831

Very Game of Thrones.

Spoiler

Except I'd be worried whilst having a dump that some dwarf with a grudge would burst in and shoot me with a crossbow.

 

[Swifty]

With a mere extra £300, it comes with a flushing cistern though !

 

[JamesWhitehead]

it comes with a flushing cistern though

I fear that it comes with a compartment at the back for the novice priest to lie down.

 

[Swifty]

I fear that it comes with a compartment at the back for the novice priest to lie down.

You have a sick, sick mind Jim

 

[ramonmercado]

A Swedish councillor has suggested installing music in school toilets, to help pupils worried about embarrassing noises.

Centre Party councillor Cecilia Cato, in the town of Tingsryd, says some are so concerned that they refuse to use the toilet all day.

She raised the musical solution in a proposal to the council.

"I don't think it's just about number two on the toilet, but many also don't do number one," Ms Cato told The Local.

"I've worked in the world of education for many years and know through the students that this is a problem, above all in junior and senior high school.

"I myself experienced this when I was young and now that it's being talked about many others confirm that they did too. It's not something you talk completely openly about..."

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-40235665

 

[GNC]

How about some brass band music? Or the theme to The Money Programme?

 

[David Plankton]

Could be a thread in this. Describe The Last Poo You Had With A Horn Concerto.

(Mozart - Horn Concerto No. 4 in Eb major - Rondo, Allegro)

 

[GNC]

 

[ramonmercado]

A Man Constipated From Birth Was Carrying Over 28 Pounds of Feces
His parents didn't think his condition was serious.
By Peter Hess on June 12, 2017

Imagine two decades of never being able to fully relieve yourself in the bathroom.

That was the experience a 22-year-old Chinese man lived with before doctors in Shanghai removed 30 inches of his extremely swollen colon. Weighing nearly 29 pounds, his colon was filled with feces that had accumulated there over his lifetime. He told doctors that he’d suffered constipation for his entire life, and that laxatives only offered minor relief. Doctor Yin Lu of Tenth People’s Hospital of Shanghai, where the surgery was performed, told Chinese news site The Paper that the man’s abdomen looked as if he was more than nine months pregnant.

“It looked like it could explode at any time,” said Doctor Lu, according to the Daily Star. At the end of a 3-hour operation, doctors had successfully removed the affected portion of his colon — as well as the massive accumulation of poop — and he is expected to recover. But what caused his uncomfortable situation in the first place?

The anonymous man’s painful blockage resulted from a condition known as Hirschsprung’s disease. This congenital condition — characterized by poor movement in the bowels — occurs when portions of a person’s bowel are missing nerve cells. ...

https://www.inverse.com/article/328...tm_medium=on_site&utm_campaign=article-footer

 

[Vardoger]

University warns over 'inappropriate' lavatory habits - blaming foreign students for defecating in the showers and dustbins

• The memo was emailed to 400 students and 250 staff at Strathclyde University
• It reminded them that 'all bodily fluids' needed to be 'disposed down the toilet'
• The memo singled out the 'different practices' of foreign students
• But a university spokeswoman later hurridly apologised for the email

By LUKE BARNES FOR MAILONLINE

PUBLISHED: 01:53 BST, 13 June 2017 | UPDATED: 13:45 BST, 13 June 2017


Students at one of Scotland's top universities have been told off for pooing in showers and bins.

Bosses at Strathclyde University were forced to send a memo to the 400 students and 250 staff asking them to stop with their 'inappropriate' toilet habits.

The memo, posted on Thursday, was sent by the operations management team of the University's Technology and Innovation Centre.

+2

Bosses at Strathclyde University sent the memo to 400 students and 250 staff who use the Technology and Innovation Centre (pictured)

It read: 'Given the incidence of people pooing in bins, showers and the likes, can I please remind all TIC occupants that the toilets have been provided for that specific purpose.

'All bodily fluids, solids and toilet paper must be disposed of down the toilet.

'While I appreciate that the TIC population is multi-cultural and different countries have different practices, here in the UK the accepted practice is to use only the WC.'

More text at http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4598160/University-warns-inappropriate-lavatory-habits.html

 

[AgProv]

University warns over 'inappropriate' lavatory habits - blaming foreign students for defecating in the showers and dustbins

• The memo was emailed to 400 students and 250 staff at Strathclyde University
• It reminded them that 'all bodily fluids' needed to be 'disposed down the toilet'
• The memo singled out the 'different practices' of foreign students
• But a university spokeswoman later hurridly apologised for the email

By LUKE BARNES FOR MAILONLINE

PUBLISHED: 01:53 BST, 13 June 2017 | UPDATED: 13:45 BST, 13 June 2017


Students at one of Scotland's top universities have been told off for pooing in showers and bins.

Bosses at Strathclyde University were forced to send a memo to the 400 students and 250 staff asking them to stop with their 'inappropriate' toilet habits.

The memo, posted on Thursday, was sent by the operations management team of the University's Technology and Innovation Centre.

+2

Bosses at Strathclyde University sent the memo to 400 students and 250 staff who use the Technology and Innovation Centre (pictured)

It read: 'Given the incidence of people pooing in bins, showers and the likes, can I please remind all TIC occupants that the toilets have been provided for that specific purpose.

'All bodily fluids, solids and toilet paper must be disposed of down the toilet.

'While I appreciate that the TIC population is multi-cultural and different countries have different practices, here in the UK the accepted practice is to use only the WC.'

More text at http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4598160/University-warns-inappropriate-lavatory-habits.html

So it isn't just the Rugby Club, then!

 

[Swifty]

So it isn't just the Rugby Club, then!

Back when I was a teaching assistant at a boarding school for kids with learning difficulties and behavioural problems, I noticed some of the lads giggling and running in and out of the boy's toilet .. I was asked to investigate what was going on so went in to find a massive turd in the urinal .. my first instinct was also to laugh but I had to pretend to be sensible so I didn't ... I felt sorry for the janitor though ..

 

[David Plankton]

I don't think I would be comfortable using this method of unblocking a toilet. So much scope for error.

 

[Vardoger]

Toilets attacking people in Moscow!

 

[Swifty]

Here's a social experiment using a see through (from the inside only) public toilet.

(I like that the woman takes a slice of pizza in with her at :50)

 

[Kingsize Wombat]

I didn't know where to put this - it's just funny rather than terribly Fortean, but still...

Thousands agree to clean toilets for Wi-Fi because they didn't read the terms

Tim Berners-Lee, the father of the World Wide Web, listed his top worries for the future of his creation earlier this year. One of his biggest concerns is the increasingly dense terms of service agreements that companies ask users to sign. Now, a public Wi-Fi company has demonstrated just how dangerous those complicated agreements can be by inserting absurd conditions that thousands of people unwittingly agreed to.

Purple is a Manchester-based company that specialises in running Wi-Fi hotspots for brands like Legoland, Outback Steakhouse and Pizza Express. This week, the company came clean about its two-week experiment in which it inserted a "Community Service Clause" into its terms of service agreement. More than 22,000 people signed up to perform 1000 hours of menial labour for the chance to check in on their Facebook and maybe look up some directions.

Source: http://www.smh.com.au/technology/te...hey-didnt-read-the-terms-20170717-gxd7z3.html

 

[Swifty]

University warns over 'inappropriate' lavatory habits - blaming foreign students for defecating in the showers and dustbins

• The memo was emailed to 400 students and 250 staff at Strathclyde University
• It reminded them that 'all bodily fluids' needed to be 'disposed down the toilet'
• The memo singled out the 'different practices' of foreign students
• But a university spokeswoman later hurridly apologised for the email

By LUKE BARNES FOR MAILONLINE

PUBLISHED: 01:53 BST, 13 June 2017 | UPDATED: 13:45 BST, 13 June 2017


Students at one of Scotland's top universities have been told off for pooing in showers and bins.

Bosses at Strathclyde University were forced to send a memo to the 400 students and 250 staff asking them to stop with their 'inappropriate' toilet habits.

The memo, posted on Thursday, was sent by the operations management team of the University's Technology and Innovation Centre.

+2

Bosses at Strathclyde University sent the memo to 400 students and 250 staff who use the Technology and Innovation Centre (pictured)

It read: 'Given the incidence of people pooing in bins, showers and the likes, can I please remind all TIC occupants that the toilets have been provided for that specific purpose.

'All bodily fluids, solids and toilet paper must be disposed of down the toilet.

'While I appreciate that the TIC population is multi-cultural and different countries have different practices, here in the UK the accepted practice is to use only the WC.'

More text at http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4598160/University-warns-inappropriate-lavatory-habits.html

Everybody knows that students are supposed to traditionally throw problematic turds out of the nearest window .. what's wrong with kids today?

 

[Kingsize Wombat]

I have worked in a very multi-cultural office. The problems were similar - some people from different parts of the world simply use toilets differently.

Mind you, I have struggled with a traditional Japanese toilet myself.

 

[escargot]

Oh yeah, on my travels in Italy and especially in China we encountered a certain amount of lavatorial dissonance.

Great fun!

 

[ramonmercado]

A California burglary suspect has been arrested after police say he left a key piece of evidence at the crime scene when he forgot to flush the toilet.

Investigators say Andrew Jensen's sample in the toilet bowl at the home in Los Angeles suburb of Thousand Oaks matched DNA on an FBI database.

The 42-year-old was arrested on 28 July nearly a year after the residential burglary in October 2016.

Police said they collect any type of evidence left behind at crime scenes.

Ventura County Sheriff's Office Detective Tim Lohman said the suspect "did his business and didn't flush it". ...

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-40855915

CSI can be a crap job.

 

[hunck]

When he was caught he went round the bend.

 

[Mythopoeika]

I think he may now be in bad odour.

 

[baleeber]

I have worked in a very multi-cultural office. The problems were similar - some people from different parts of the world simply use toilets differently.

Mind you, I have struggled with a traditional Japanese toilet myself.

Wombat, have you ever lived in Japan?

I've been living in central Japan for most of the last 20 years. I find traditional Japanese toilets a struggle, but I do have to agree that they are more sanitary that western toilets. No part of the body actually touches the toilet.

As well, I've read and heard that the squatting posture is actually better than sitting, and more natural for us apes.

 

[Gambeir]

Wombat, have you ever lived in Japan?

I've been living in central Japan for most of the last 20 years. I find traditional Japanese toilets a struggle, but I do have to agree that they are more sanitary that western toilets. No part of the body actually touches the toilet.

As well, I've read and heard that the squatting posture is actually better than sitting, and more natural for us apes.

Japan? Why not just move to Tahiti and be done with it? I'm not even sure they have toilets. I think it's more of a kind on the run kind of thing and call it composting. Very organic. Surprised the locals round these parts haven't adopted the same what with their pesudo-green bohemianism's they spout whilst kayaking about like they were natives.

 

[Kingsize Wombat]

Wombat, have you ever lived in Japan?

I've been living in central Japan for most of the last 20 years. I find traditional Japanese toilets a struggle, but I do have to agree that they are more sanitary that western toilets. No part of the body actually touches the toilet.

As well, I've read and heard that the squatting posture is actually better than sitting, and more natural for us apes.

No - but I have visited a couple of times. First time I think I made every mistake in the book.

It's a wonderful country, but I always felt a bit like an elephant in a China shop - lots of etiquette to get wrong, lol.