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Thanks for that, Ramon. Instant constipation cure. Don't expect it will help out with my insomnia though.
Oh, please don't let it it disturb your sleep. For one thing, just imagine how many exciting nutritional opportunities you'd be missing out on. Eight per year, so they say.
 
Oh, please don't let it it disturb your sleep. For one thing, just imagine how many exciting nutritional opportunities you'd be missing out on. Eight per year, so they say.
Only if they crawl in up my nose. I always put Gorilla tape over my mouth as soon as I've had my cocoa. And brushed my teeth, of course.

And before anyone else says it, yes it does keep the gorillas out too.
 
When it comes to comedy double acts, my inclination is more Morecambe and less Wise-wise.

*Just realised I've posted this in wrong thread. That's why it seems so random! Should be in the thread about 'words & phrases you never want to hear again' apropos the posts referring to the suffix '...wise'.
 
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The Joros are going to parachute down on you.

New research, published Feb. 17 in the journal Physiological Entomology, suggests that the palm-sized Joro spider, which swarmed North Georgia by the millions last September, has a special resilience to the cold.

This has led scientists to suggest that the 3-inch (7.6 centimeters) bright-yellow-striped spiders — whose hatchlings disperse by fashioning web parachutes to fly as far as 100 miles (161 kilometers) — could soon dominate the Eastern Seaboard.

“People should try to learn to live with them,” lead author Andy Davis, a research scientist at the University of Georgia, said in a statement. “If they‘re literally in your way, I can see taking a web down and moving them to the side, but they‘re just going to be back next year.”

https://www.scientificamerican.com/...d-flying-spiders-could-invade-the-east-coast/
An excellent Twitter thread about these Spiders, by someone who has handled many Species of Spiders, including Spiders in this category of (or very closely related) Species of Spiders. Important point she makes: Many news articles about these Spiders are sensationalist articles; she provides more info for those interested. Here's the link:
 
Many years ago, just after the film Arachnophobia came out on Video the next door neighbours to where I used to live said that they watched the movie then almost immediately a big house spider ran across the floor of the house…. This always creeped me out for some reason.

Although expecting It to, it never happened to me until the first time I watched it with my Girlfriend (now wife) after I just moved in with her…. The film finished and she climbed the stairs to go to the bog, as she got to the top a weird looking spider dangled down in front of her and landed on the stairs, she screamed and shout What the F!! Spider! (being still creeped out from the film).

I went and investigated (shit scared myself) and did indeed find a small but funny looking spider, I had to search it in that Google and it turned out to be a male false widow of all things, it did make sense as I had seen females (which I knew what they looked like) in the shed.

Now I find spider’s really interesting and I do have a science background…. But they do still give me the prehistoric heeby jeebies that I cannot explain!

I’m pretty sure we are programmed to fear them… no matter what experts say!!

And I’m pretty sure they know when your watching that film!!!!! Keeping an eye on you? Maybe they think it’s spider porn?

Has it happened to anyone else???
 
Here's some Daily Mail spider plague scaremongering, in case you've run out of stressors ...
False widow warning: Surge of poisonous spiders are now creeping into homes after summer heatwave 'encouraged them to breed', experts fear

Poisonous spiders are set to descend on the United Kingdom this Bank Holiday weekend with temperatures in parts of Britain expected to be higher than Mexico.

The extreme heatwave has caused false widow spiders to breed and multiply across the British Isles. ...

False widows are not particularly venomous and being bitten by one can feel like a wasp sting, according to the Natural History Museum.

However there have been rare instances where they have caused a serious sting and triggered an allergic reaction in humans.

The news comes after the Met Office predicted an upcoming week of rising and falling temperatures.

The weekend is expected to be warm across the UK with parts of the UK reaching the low 30sC, leading to the possibility of another heatwave.

The warm weather will help false widows to proliferate as their hibernation period ends. ...
FULL STORY: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/ar...eping-homes-summer-heatwave-experts-fear.html
 
Well, that article made me cringe, all right. It was enough to read the opening two words. They're not poisonous - although you probably wouldn't have a particularly enjoyable experience if you were to eat one - they're venomous. And if their hibernation period is just ending now, their body clocks are all over the place... The "invasion" - and note the combative language - at this time of year is actually the result of the mature males setting out in search of mates: they roam around, and hence are much more visible than at other times of the year.

Is there a word for the intense loathing and disgust one experiences when encountering the Daily Mail?
 
*Chuckle*
The word-use is cringingly obvious; "Surge", "set to descend", "invasion".
I believe (but happy to be corrected) arachnophobia remains the most common phobia?
The media emotionally manipulate their readership in so many ways - especially when it comes to elections and crises - and this is no different. It's set to manipulate emotions in their readership who constantly feel at threat - in an interesting but dry story, their default setting is to scaremonger.
Anyhow, all spiders are venomous, the ability to inject the venom through our skin varies between species (even tiny money spiders) and the toxicity varies with the usual prey-type.
And the word for the physical and emotional response to any Daily Mail contact is "Gringe!" - a combination of "Grr" and "cringe".
 
One of the things about living in Australia is that you learn a healthy respect for spiders of all sorts from an early age. This is a must as we are home to some of the deadliest on Earth.
Rarely do they come inside and when they do they generally aren't ones you need to worry about too much. One rule of thumb, no matter where you are though is to check any shoes left outside before putting them on. You don't want any unpleasant surprises.
 
Thanks for the warning. I'm fully prepared here now. I've got my flame-thrower and cattle-prod at the ready. They won't get anywhere near me. Those pesky Daily Mail readers. They get everywhere.
And not just your everyday type Mail readers either, it seems!:)
1661350357882.png
 
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When I read the witness ''dropped his kebab in horror'' I wondered if that was a euphemism.

Enormous rare spider the size of 'drink coaster' found by man at home​

Dan Ghuman ''dropped his kebab in horror'' when he discovered the believed to be rare 'Gnaphosa nigerrima' spider after he returned home from a night out.



A terrified fitness coach stumbled across potentially one of Britain's most rare spiders at his countryside property after coming home from a night out. Dan Ghuman, 29, dropped his late night kebab in horror when he encountered the enormous critter on his Leicestershire wall in the early hours of October, 1.
Dan said after laying eyes on the beast described as the size of a ''small drinks coaster'', he had a feeling it wasn't an ordinary spider. After posting a photo of the creature online and doing some research, he quickly realised that the huge creepy crawly he found could be a rare and endangered species, Leicester Mercury reports.
https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/uk-world-news/enormous-rare-spider-size-drink-28159319
 
When I read the witness ''dropped his kebab in horror'' I wondered if that was a euphemism.

https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/uk-world-news/enormous-rare-spider-size-drink-28159319
We used to get spiders the size of saucers in this gaff, every year from mid-August through to mid-October, but since I invested in spider repellent a few years ago, we hardly get one throughout the spider season. Trust me it does work, and the peppermint smell the repellent gives off is quite pleasant too.

It’s long since been deleted off of my daughter’s phone, but about 5 years ago she filmed me catching a huge cardinal spider in an old fashioned pint glass. The thing was so big, that despite the size of the glass I unfortunately chopped off most of its legs while trying to capture it

I still feel a bit guilty about that.!!
 
We used to get spiders the size of saucers in this gaff, every year from mid-August through to mid-October, but since I invested in spider repellent a few years ago, we hardly get one throughout the spider season. Trust me it does work, and the peppermint smell the repellent gives off is quite pleasant too.

It’s long since been deleted off of my daughter’s phone, but about 5 years ago she filmed me catching a huge cardinal spider in an old fashioned pint glass. The thing was so big, that despite the size of the glass I unfortunately chopped off most of its legs while trying to capture it

I still feel a bit guilty about that.!!
I've been using a homemade peppermint spray for a few years and it's very effective. Just a plant spray, water and a few drops of peppermint oil, sometimes I'll add citrus oil or tea tree oil if it's available.
 
rolled-up-newspaper-picture-id96372986


Doesn’t smell of much at all, but 100% effective.

maximus otter

:):) You Can't kill spiders Max. They are very clean creatures, who get rid of certain other bugs that like to invade our homes at certain times of the year.
The old saying is "if a human being wants to thrive, then let a spider stay alive"
 
We have been getting huge spiders in our house for the past several weeks. You know, the kind where I go... "Er... Mr Zebra..." and Mr Zebra appears wielding a slipper or large piece of kitchen towel or vacuum cleaner (depending on spider size and location) whilst I back out of the room (if I can) or stand there screaming (if I can't) whilst the dogs look at me perplexed...

... any old way, a couple of weeks ago there I was asleep when something woke me up and I turned over in bed to see, in the dim light from the streetlight outside, a movement along the edge of the mattress, going upwards from roughly level with the bottom of the pillow toward the headboard. In the half-light it didn't look too big, so I switched on the bedside light to see... nothing. Being a curious frail I peered closer between the mattress and headboard but still saw nothing.

Until I drew back and my gaze shifted slightly upwards, at which I point I saw the culprit, now in full-sized splendour sitting there on the side edge of the headboard, scant inches from the light switch I had touched just moments earlier, and even closer to where my face had been even fewer moments earlier whilst looking for the thing.

Yes, it was one of the huge ones.

Mr Zebra sleeps quite heavily but I was impressed at the speed at which he became awake, crossing to that side of the bed deftly as he caught the paper hanky I tossed to him as I backed away from the area.

As you can imagine, I didn't sleep well the rest of that night, and the next day we researched how to repel the accursed beasts-with-too-many-legs, and discovered the concept of peppermint oil versus spiders.

So, since then there has been a nightly ritual of peppermint-oil-mixed-with-water sprayed profusely around the sides of the bed and me lying there in my usual insomniac state praying for daylight and the coming of winter.
 
We have been getting huge spiders in our house for the past several weeks. You know, the kind where I go... "Er... Mr Zebra..." and Mr Zebra appears wielding a slipper or large piece of kitchen towel or vacuum cleaner (depending on spider size and location) whilst I back out of the room (if I can) or stand there screaming (if I can't) whilst the dogs look at me perplexed...

... any old way, a couple of weeks ago there I was asleep when something woke me up and I turned over in bed to see, in the dim light from the streetlight outside, a movement along the edge of the mattress, going upwards from roughly level with the bottom of the pillow toward the headboard. In the half-light it didn't look too big, so I switched on the bedside light to see... nothing. Being a curious frail I peered closer between the mattress and headboard but still saw nothing.

Until I drew back and my gaze shifted slightly upwards, at which I point I saw the culprit, now in full-sized splendour sitting there on the side edge of the headboard, scant inches from the light switch I had touched just moments earlier, and even closer to where my face had been even fewer moments earlier whilst looking for the thing.

Yes, it was one of the huge ones.

Mr Zebra sleeps quite heavily but I was impressed at the speed at which he became awake, crossing to that side of the bed deftly as he caught the paper hanky I tossed to him as I backed away from the area.

As you can imagine, I didn't sleep well the rest of that night, and the next day we researched how to repel the accursed beasts-with-too-many-legs, and discovered the concept of peppermint oil versus spiders.

So, since then there has been a nightly ritual of peppermint-oil-mixed-with-water sprayed profusely around the sides of the bed and me lying there in my usual insomniac state praying for daylight and the coming of winter.
Yes, peppermint oil - I told my Mum about this recently.
 
Necrophile Spiders.

+ + +

Mating can be risky, especially if you're just a wee male spider.

In many species, the female – often larger and more intimidating than any potential wooer – finishes the act of copulation by enjoying her mate as a tasty post-coital meal.

So a male often has to decide between biological imperatives: survival or procreation. Procreation usually wins, resulting in… well, welcome to snack-town, buddy.

Many spiders have developed defensive strategies to avoid this unpleasant fate, such as launching at speed away from the female as soon as mating is complete or wrapping her in silk to prevent her from attacking. But funnel-web spiders of the species Aterigena aculeata, native to China, take a different tack.

As new research explains, females of the species signal their safety and receptiveness as a mating partner by curling up and playing dead, allowing males to approach, mate, and scuttle away again without coming to harm at their fangs. ...

https://www.sciencealert.com/these-...-dead-to-lure-suspicious-lovers-into-safe-sex
 
Sounds like an idea for a horror movie
Couple who bought £1m Scottish castle terrorised by spiders invading their home
David and Chelom Leavitt bought Knockderry Castle in Argyll and Bute after its former owners were evicted but have faced some unwelcome visitors.


The new owner of a £1.15m Scottish castle has revealed she has been left terrified by hordes of spiders in her stately home. David and Chelom Leavitt bought Knockderry Castle in Argyll and Bute after its former owners were evicted.

David, 59, was heavily involved in the case surrounding Nicholas Rossi, a fugitive who was caught in a Glasgow hospital after faking his own death in America. The couple, who have nine children, have hired teams of experts to help their labour of love at Knockderry.
https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/couple-who-bought-15m-scottish-30109591
 
I fully respect the fear of arachnophobes - even though I don't share it.
However, I've always wondered if the fear of them somehow magnifies their percieved size.
I've often been asked to remove spiders declared to be 'massive', 'giant' etc. but as I get rid of them outside, I can't help thinking they weren't as big as advertised.
I have a pet tarantula (a Tliltocatl Albopilosus called Fluffy), so my idea of big is different.
 
I fully respect the fear of arachnophobes - even though I don't share it.
However, I've always wondered if the fear of them somehow magnifies their percieved size.
I've often been asked to remove spiders declared to be 'massive', 'giant' etc. but as I get rid of them outside, I can't help thinking they weren't as big as advertised.
I have a pet tarantula (a Tliltocatl Albopilosus called Fluffy), so my idea of big is different.
I really think we need to see a nice pic of Fluffy, Stormkhan.

We have a thread about getting to know and see our fellow Forteans. Maybe we should have a thread where they can show off their pets? I currently am petless, so other people's pets provide me with a vicarious thrill. However many legs they may have.
 
I fully respect the fear of arachnophobes - even though I don't share it.
However, I've always wondered if the fear of them somehow magnifies their percieved size.
I've often been asked to remove spiders declared to be 'massive', 'giant' etc. but as I get rid of them outside, I can't help thinking they weren't as big as advertised.
I have a pet tarantula (a Tliltocatl Albopilosus called Fluffy), so my idea of big is different.
A colleague once told me that her husband was terrified of spiders and she would often have to remove them if he saw one. She said they were at a wildlife exhibition and one display had a tarantula wandering about on a table top and it didn't faze him at all.
He told her later that he reckoned it was so big his brain just didn't register it as a "normal" spider, he said it was like a hamster with an extra set of legs! He was still scared of the ones in the house though.
 
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