Blitz Limericks

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
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The ways of the mollusk are mysterious
Be careful or you’ll wind up delirious.
"Coffee at Costa's?"
"No, I'd rather munch hostas!"
And the problem of slime becomes serious!

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Ooh I say, those shorts are quite daring
Don't bend down, or they might need repairing!
 

escargot

Disciple of Marduk
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Ooh I say, those shorts are quite daring
Don't bend down, or they might need repairing!
As you have 'stomach flu'
You might follow through
I'll get one in the eye if I'm staring!

It's too hot to sit in sit and write rhyme
So I'm off to make use of my time
 

IamSundog

Not insane
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It's too hot to sit in sit and write rhyme
So I'm off to make use of my time
I’ll find out how much sex is
To be had in Texas
While I’m still fit and in my prime


Our exuberance will not be denied
Let’s gun our motorcycles and ride
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
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Our exuberance will not be denied
Let’s gun our motorcycles and ride.
Being an OAP
It's the bus, for me!
Shall we meet, and eat outside?

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We'll go to the park, if it's fine.
I'll bring cake and a bottle of wine.
 

IamSundog

Not insane
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We'll go to the park, if it's fine.
I'll bring cake and a bottle of wine.
But remember we can’t get
Too close on our blanket
You on your side, me on mine


Romance in the era of COVID
Leaves much to be desired, it is noted
 
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escargot

Disciple of Marduk
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Romance in the era of COVID
Leaves much to be desired, it is noted
Although we're desirous
We don't want the virus
So we're both head-to-toe rubber-coated!

In our masks we all look the same
So I've made up a new grown-up game
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
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In our masks we all look the same
So I've made up a new grown-up game
Whilst one metre apart
Make each player fart!
By the sound and the smell -guess the name!

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This is not for polite company
e.g. if the Queen comes to tea!
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
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This is not for polite company
e.g. if the Queen comes to tea!
She much prefers burping
After hefty soup slurping
And wolfing down kebabs with glee.

***

I feel like I'm walking on air
Since I tied balloons to my deckchair
 

IamSundog

Not insane
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I feel like I'm walking on air
Since I tied balloons to my deckchair
Floating to such great height
Hampering aircraft in flight
Without damaging the ozone layer.


I’ve captured completely on video
Your dalliance out on the patio
 
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