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Childhood Impressions

Jacket_Potato

Devoted Cultist
Joined
Oct 20, 2018
Messages
125
This thought / memory has been going round my head recently:

When i was a young child (under 7, because it was before i moved bedroom to my main bedroom where i stayed until i left home), i remember starting to wake up & being convinced it was my wedding day - except i didn't want to get married. I would start to wake and think 'no don't let it be morning' with a sense of sadness & fear for my wedding. But then i would wake, see my bedroom & realise i was very young and definitely not getting married that day! Sure this happened several times

In adulthood, i've had several relationships & have been with my boyfriend for years, but i've not got married. Although i probably would if Man of My Dreams showed up on a stallion & rode off with me into the sunset (i live in hope)

Past life memory? Dream? Who knows, it was a strange feeling, it had the sense of 'other' and didn't feel linked to waking life, which is the best i can describe it really

Does anybody else have any strong impressions of a fortean nature from early childhood?
 
This thought / memory has been going round my head recently:



In adulthood, i've had several relationships & have been with my boyfriend for years, but i've not got married. Although i probably would if Man of My Dreams showed up on a stallion & rode off with me into the sunset (i live in hope)

Interesting, in a Fortean way, that the guy you are spending your time with, (and his) and have done for years, , does not appear to be the guy you want to spend your life with.

Maybe he needs to buy a horse.

INT21.
 
SIDE NOTE: We have threads for childhood memories, terrors, and beliefs. However, this strikes me as something distinct from any of those topics.
 
Jacket Potato:

Your query resonated with me in a way that may suggest a possible explanation, though I'll have to cite an embarrassing childhood episode for illustration ...

If you can remember them clearly enough and dissect them deeply enough, it's pretty evident that dreams reflect or incorporate elements from waking life. I've found that this sort of contextualization with regard to recent / current life circumstances remains in effect when initially awakening (though I don't claim it's necessarily a carryover effect from the most recent dream).

Age 7 is the same age at which I somehow became concerned about needing a mate / spouse for the long haul. I have no recollection of how this idea came to loom front and center in my mind. It was my second year at school (and away from a relatively closed family environment), so it may have had something to do with collective socialization and / or priorities detected in my classmates / new friends. It may also have derived from marriage / mating tropes on TV, or even just initial recognition and decipherment of the married relationships forming my own family's relationship networks and internal boundaries. Anyway ...

This notion agitated me sufficiently to impel action. I passed a note (an anomalous act in and of itself ... ) to a female classmate - a nice girl I'd never really interacted with or knew any better than I knew other girls in the class - asking whether she'd marry me. She passed the note back with an affirmative answer, and that was pretty much that. From that point onward we didn't interact any more frequently, nor did we seek each other out.

It would be another 3 or 4 years before I developed any serious interest in girls, and during this interim period they remained simply a skirted (in two senses ... ) contingent within my childhood social realm.

Now ... Circling back to your experience ...

I wonder if you had developed a naive concern for mating / marriage analogous to mine, which in your case manifested itself in the more private context of dreams / post-dream waking.
 
Interesting, in a Fortean way, that the guy you are spending your time with, (and his) and have done for years, , does not appear to be the guy you want to spend your life with.

Maybe he needs to buy a horse.

INT21.
Maybe you're right in a way - but for very non fortean reasons. I love him very much, but he makes very little effort in life, consistently unemployed, lazy. I work hard to pay all the bills etc, and feel taken for granted sometimes. So i do fantasise about the Man of My Dreams whilst trying to make it work in the real world!

Apologies for my non fortean Dear Diary moment
 
Jacket Potato:

Your query resonated with me in a way that may suggest a possible explanation, though I'll have to cite an embarrassing childhood episode for illustration ...

If you can remember them clearly enough and dissect them deeply enough, it's pretty evident that dreams reflect or incorporate elements from waking life. I've found that this sort of contextualization with regard to recent / current life circumstances remains in effect when initially awakening (though I don't claim it's necessarily a carryover effect from the most recent dream).

Age 7 is the same age at which I somehow became concerned about needing a mate / spouse for the long haul. I have no recollection of how this idea came to loom front and center in my mind. It was my second year at school (and away from a relatively closed family environment), so it may have had something to do with collective socialization and / or priorities detected in my classmates / new friends. It may also have derived from marriage / mating tropes on TV, or even just initial recognition and decipherment of the married relationships forming my own family's relationship networks and internal boundaries. Anyway ...

This notion agitated me sufficiently to impel action. I passed a note (an anomalous act in and of itself ... ) to a female classmate - a nice girl I'd never really interacted with or knew any better than I knew other girls in the class - asking whether she'd marry me. She passed the note back with an affirmative answer, and that was pretty much that. From that point onward we didn't interact any more frequently, nor did we seek each other out.

It would be another 3 or 4 years before I developed any serious interest in girls, and during this interim period they remained simply a skirted (in two senses ... ) contingent within my childhood social realm.

Now ... Circling back to your experience ...

I wonder if you had developed a naive concern for mating / marriage analogous to mine, which in your case manifested itself in the more private context of dreams / post-dream waking.
You could well be right - i remember my first crush being during infants school (around age 6 or so probably), not in the adult sense but just a strong feeling of wanting to be close to one particular boy more than anyone else.

But when i had these semi waking feelings of wedding days, i felt myself to be an adult and was always surprised and relieved to open my eyes & realise i was a child, because it felt so real - this wedding was happening & it wasn't what i wanted, but i felt little control over it (feelings that i couldn't word at the time but now try to phrase how it felt) Not things i could at that time relate to in reality

What a lovely story about the note as well, such a sweet thing to do!
 
Fascinating dream Jacket_potato deffo has a fortean feel!

I agree with Enola it is aroundabout that time that it's dawning on you that one of these days you are going to have to find a mate cos that's just the way it is. There was one boy at school who used to cry and refuse to go to school unless he had a sweet to give to me although when he handed it over he was very matter of fact about it ...... bless him I wonder where he is now and if he's got a horse? Our mother's were friends and that's how I knew about the tears ..... mothers can be such tell tales!

Although your dream coincided with that age it seems over and beyond the basic realisation. Were there people in your familly /social circle who had very obviously married the wrong person? Had you been to many weddings? Maybe you'd earwigged on adults gossip? Youngsters are very good at pretending to be absorbed in a game playing at their mothers feet while their ears are out on stalks at the level of their lips!

It's possible your sleeping self was playing with 'here and now' themes but it's also, given the intensity, that if such a thing ever gets proved to be possible that it's a memory from another life or even an inherited memory (again if such a thing is possible).

There again given the contrariness of dreams it could have been symbolic of something else entirely ... some other anxiety finding expression. However as you descibe it it doesn't seem to be this later explanation. Very interesting!

Sollywos x
 
I think it would be important to know whether there had been any weddings in your family circle up to this point, or people had been talking about wedding preparations. Because it's a very similar dream to my persistant anxiety dream about suddenly waking up on Christmas morning and having made no advance preparations at all.

Although admittedly my 'surprise Christmas' dream is one I have as an adult responsible for all the Christmas prep, and you, as a child, wouldn't be required to be responsible for more than turning up for a wedding...
 
EnolaGaia I wonder if the girl in question still has the note tucked away in a treasure box that she looks at from time to time and sighs over 'the one that got away'? :) The story far from being embarrassing shows that you had a practical, down to earth no nonsense approach. 'Right that's that issue sorted I can get on with the rest of my childhood now'. Love it!

Sollywos x
 
Fascinating dream Jacket_potato deffo has a fortean feel!

I agree with Enola it is aroundabout that time that it's dawning on you that one of these days you are going to have to find a mate cos that's just the way it is. There was one boy at school who used to cry and refuse to go to school unless he had a sweet to give to me although when he handed it over he was very matter of fact about it ...... bless him I wonder where he is now and if he's got a horse? Our mother's were friends and that's how I knew about the tears ..... mothers can be such tell tales!

Although your dream coincided with that age it seems over and beyond the basic realisation. Were there people in your familly /social circle who had very obviously married the wrong person? Had you been to many weddings? Maybe you'd earwigged on adults gossip? Youngsters are very good at pretending to be absorbed in a game playing at their mothers feet while their ears are out on stalks at the level of their lips!

It's possible your sleeping self was playing with 'here and now' themes but it's also, given the intensity, that if such a thing ever gets proved to be possible that it's a memory from another life or even an inherited memory (again if such a thing is possible).

There again given the contrariness of dreams it could have been symbolic of something else entirely ... some other anxiety finding expression. However as you descibe it it doesn't seem to be this later explanation. Very interesting!

Sollywos x
What an absolutely lovely story, that boy sounded such a sweet kid! Suppose it's the similar trait of wanting to look after a girl that we (or at least me) look for in men

There were definitely no family weddings as a child, although i was probably a guest at one or two (no clear memories) but it would have just been turning up somewhere in a nice dress for me. Not aware of any knowledge about marriages or wrong ones, but i couldn't say for definite because it was so long ago. All i know is the feeling i woke with didn't seem to match life

Very interesting responses, thank you!
 
I think it would be important to know whether there had been any weddings in your family circle up to this point, or people had been talking about wedding preparations. Because it's a very similar dream to my persistant anxiety dream about suddenly waking up on Christmas morning and having made no advance preparations at all.

Although admittedly my 'surprise Christmas' dream is one I have as an adult responsible for all the Christmas prep, and you, as a child, wouldn't be required to be responsible for more than turning up for a wedding...
The christmas dream sounds like a classic anxiety dream of failing to be prepared - i dream similar things of turning up at the airport with no luggage or passport, and did i forget to print my boarding pass? Very stressful - especially with christmas preparations tending to be such a big deal!

No family weddings in my early childhood, although sure i was probably a guest at one or two other weddings - certaintly no responsibilities at them though!
 
There were no family weddings in my early childhood either - I was too young! ;)
 
What an absolutely lovely story, that boy sounded such a sweet kid! Suppose it's the similar trait of wanting to look after a girl that we (or at least me) look for in men

Don't let the hard core feminists hear you say that!!!!

I frequently begin statements with 'don't tell my feminist friends I said this but ....'. Yes there were battles that needed to be fought and changes that needed to be made attitudes to change etc. I learnt a lot in the days when I was more actively involved but they didn't get everything right. Still that's not a discussion for this thread but I suspect you and I are singing from the same song book!!

Just off to climb up to the castle battlements with my binoculars ready to scan the horizon for approaching knights in shining armour. (Do not tell my feminist friends where I am. ) <whistle>

Sollywos x
 
Don't let the hard core feminists hear you say that!!!!

I frequently begin statements with 'don't tell my feminist friends I said this but ....'. Yes there were battles that needed to be fought and changes that needed to be made attitudes to change etc. I learnt a lot in the days when I was more actively involved but they didn't get everything right. Still that's not a discussion for this thread but I suspect you and I are singing from the same song book!!

Just off to climb up to the castle battlements with my binoculars ready to scan the horizon for approaching knights in shining armour. (Do not tell my feminist friends where I am. ) <whistle>

Sollywos x
I won't tell them where you are if you don't tell mine where i am!

I've got a decent job & pay my own bills & have a good independent social life, but under the cloak of anonymity i now would choose a man who pursued me & made me feel special, who could look after & take care of me if needed, someone i could respect & who would excite me & show me life. Haven't had kids yet & hope to some day maybe, pass me the binoculars!

Everyone will have their own opinion, but that's the personal realisation i've come to about my own feelings when i've really questioned myself about what i want, and it's nice to be open in a place where nobody knows me, quite refreshing
 
The story far from being embarrassing shows that you had a practical, down to earth no nonsense approach. 'Right that's that issue sorted I can get on with the rest of my childhood now'. Love it! ...

Thanks, but ... Marking "make reservation for eventual spouse" off my naive childhood to-do list wasn't the end of it. There was yet another little life lesson awaiting me ...


EnolaGaia I wonder if the girl in question still has the note tucked away in a treasure box that she looks at from time to time and sighs over 'the one that got away'? ...

Oh, geez ... :doh: Now I'm obligated to relate the even more (retrospectively) embarrassing follow-up chapter ... :roll:

As I'd indicated, the girl who'd accorded me the marriage reservation (Miss E) and I didn't maintain any special relationship following confirmation of our marital deal. She then disappeared from my school at the end of that 2nd grade school year. Her family home had been absorbed within our hometown's newly expanded city limits, so she switched to attending a city school.

At least two - and possibly three - years passed - during which time I had no contact or correspondence with Miss E, and I drifted onward to discover and explore new interests (none of which concerned relationships with girls). Then ...

One day I returned home from school, and my mother said she needed to talk with me. She'd received a phone call from Miss E's mother, who was planning a big birthday party for Miss E and who'd requested I come as a special guest of apparent significance to Miss E. Mom expressed surprise that I'd had a girlfriend I'd never mentioned, and she notified me she'd assured Miss E's mother I'd certainly be attending the party.

Uh-oh ... The mothers' planning my agenda insinuated there was something in effect that was more formal - and for all I knew more binding - than I'd anticipated. My overactive imagination began battering me with dark thoughts of inescapable ramifications from my little marriage contract. I became obsessed with the idea I'd set something in motion that I was soon to regret. I'm pretty sure I scoured the encyclopedia to check whether arranged marriages were legal in the USA.

On the appointed day, I was dressed in my Sunday best (complete with tie) and delivered to Miss E's home with a nice gift in hand. Miss E's mother and older sister (who would serve as our chaperone) greeted me with considerable flourish, ushered me inside, and presented me to Miss E in front of a group of kids unknown to me (presumably Miss E's new social circle) as if I were either a guest of honor or the crowning surprise birthday gift.

I put on a convivial face, dialed up my most studiously managed manners, presented my gift to Miss E, took the seat offered me beside her, and began playing the improvised role of someone who knew what the **** was going on and was pleased to be part of it. Following the general salutations, gift-giving, and some group party games my acting abilities were even more strenuously tested when Miss E's older sister ushered Miss E and me outdoors where we could have some private time on a swing (to which the sister catered our refreshments). The topics of our relationship (express or implied) and our earlier marriage deal never came up. Miss E and I chatted about school, vacations, and our pets for a length of time before my parents returned to pick me up.

That was the last direct contact I ever had with Miss E. I never learned why my presence at her party was solicited, what impression her family had of my connection with Miss E, or what lingering impression of me Miss E herself had carried forward from our 2nd grade interaction.

I came away from that episode having learned multiple things that would be relevant in the decades to come:

- Be careful in making offers and even casually agreeing to any plan(s);
- When confronted with unrecognizable circumstances, take the time to let things flow and go with that flow;
- Good manners and pleasant conversation are the social equivalent of a life-saving gas mask; and
- It's possible to bluff one's way through a surrealistic situation and escape intact.

I also came away with another lesson learned that would remain doctrinal policy for the next few years:

- Don't mess with the girls! :evillaugh:
 
Thanks, but ... Marking "make reservation for eventual spouse" off my naive childhood to-do list wasn't the end of it. There was yet another little life lesson awaiting me ...




Oh, geez ... :doh: Now I'm obligated to relate the even more (retrospectively) embarrassing follow-up chapter ... :roll:

As I'd indicated, the girl who'd accorded me the marriage reservation (Miss E) and I didn't maintain any special relationship following confirmation of our marital deal. She then disappeared from my school at the end of that 2nd grade school year. Her family home had been absorbed within our hometown's newly expanded city limits, so she switched to attending a city school.

At least two - and possibly three - years passed - during which time I had no contact or correspondence with Miss E, and I drifted onward to discover and explore new interests (none of which concerned relationships with girls). Then ...

One day I returned home from school, and my mother said she needed to talk with me. She'd received a phone call from Miss E's mother, who was planning a big birthday party for Miss E and who'd requested I come as a special guest of apparent significance to Miss E. Mom expressed surprise that I'd had a girlfriend I'd never mentioned, and she notified me she'd assured Miss E's mother I'd certainly be attending the party.

Uh-oh ... The mothers' planning my agenda insinuated there was something in effect that was more formal - and for all I knew more binding - than I'd anticipated. My overactive imagination began battering me with dark thoughts of inescapable ramifications from my little marriage contract. I became obsessed with the idea I'd set something in motion that I was soon to regret. I'm pretty sure I scoured the encyclopedia to check whether arranged marriages were legal in the USA.

On the appointed day, I was dressed in my Sunday best (complete with tie) and delivered to Miss E's home with a nice gift in hand. Miss E's mother and older sister (who would serve as our chaperone) greeted me with considerable flourish, ushered me inside, and presented me to Miss E in front of a group of kids unknown to me (presumably Miss E's new social circle) as if I were either a guest of honor or the crowning surprise birthday gift.

I put on a convivial face, dialed up my most studiously managed manners, presented my gift to Miss E, took the seat offered me beside her, and began playing the improvised role of someone who knew what the **** was going on and was pleased to be part of it. Following the general salutations, gift-giving, and some group party games my acting abilities were even more strenuously tested when Miss E's older sister ushered Miss E and me outdoors where we could have some private time on a swing (to which the sister catered our refreshments). The topics of our relationship (express or implied) and our earlier marriage deal never came up. Miss E and I chatted about school, vacations, and our pets for a length of time before my parents returned to pick me up.

That was the last direct contact I ever had with Miss E. I never learned why my presence at her party was solicited, what impression her family had of my connection with Miss E, or what lingering impression of me Miss E herself had carried forward from our 2nd grade interaction.

I came away from that episode having learned multiple things that would be relevant in the decades to come:

- Be careful in making offers and even casually agreeing to any plan(s);
- When confronted with unrecognizable circumstances, take the time to let things flow and go with that flow;
- Good manners and pleasant conversation are the social equivalent of a life-saving gas mask; and
- It's possible to bluff one's way through a surrealistic situation and escape intact.

I also came away with another lesson learned that would remain doctrinal policy for the next few years:

- Don't mess with the girls! :evillaugh:
You were probably very special to her! To be chosen by someone is a lovely thing very sweet

And also fantastic advice in those bullet points - you learned young!
 
but under the cloak of anonymity i now would choose a man who pursued me & made me feel special, who could look after & take care of me if needed

Looking back, I wouldn't marry anyone misguided enough to want to marry me.

In fact I wouldn't get married at all.

Sorry girls, Your poor broken hearts will eventually mend.

INT21.
 
I also came away with another lesson learned that would remain doctrinal policy for the next few years:

- Don't mess with the girls! :evillaugh:
Because they're actually smarter than the guys... now I've revealed that secret, I'll probably be assassinated.
 
Because most of them have an agenda and a limited time to fill it.

But we are wandering off topic again....

:)
 
Uh-oh ... The mothers' planning my agenda insinuated there was something in effect that was more formal - and for all I knew more binding - than I'd anticipated. My overactive imagination began battering me with dark thoughts of inescapable ramifications from my little marriage contract. I became obsessed with the idea I'd set something in motion that I was soon to regret. I'm pretty sure I scoured the encyclopedia to check whether arranged marriages were legal in the USA.

Thank you for sharing the rest of the story EnolaGaia ... this part actually brought tears of laughter!

Yep those life lessons certainly stand you in good stead and all the more from having been learnt young.

My original comment still stands, in fact I'm even more sure that she's kept that note and still sighs over you! :)

Sollywos x
 
Henry,

Nope, passwords on everything.

Plus it's just my opinion. No one is obliged to share.
 
I won't tell them where you are if you don't tell mine where i am!

Haven't had kids yet & hope to some day maybe, pass me the binoculars!

Everyone will have their own opinion, but that's the personal realisation i've come to about my own feelings when i've really questioned myself about what i want, and it's nice to be open in a place where nobody knows me, quite refreshing

Here's the binoculars you're younger than me and as you've not yet had children your need is greater! (Just ask if he has a dad for me will you?) I suspect that we are far from alone skulking in the shadows avoiding the feminist mafia!

Anyway to return to the topic. Something that made me sit up and take notice of your dream was your describing it:-

Past life memory? Dream? Who knows, it was a strange feeling, it had the sense of 'other' and didn't feel linked to waking life, which is the best i can describe it really

Of the few precognitive dreams I've had that's the feeling I've woken up with. I've described it as 'that was not my dream' in that it didn't fall into place with my waking concerns as normal dreams do. It's just a 'knowing' and as such can't be put under any scientific scrutiny. Each time I've made sure to tell my partner of the time, I guess as I'm partnerless now I'd have to post it on here to provide the evidence, well such as it is, it still wouldn't be proof of anything really. It's been many years since it happened though so don't hold your breath!

So yep who knows where that dream came from ..... maybe even as a warning from your future self? Maybe there is a mundane explaination but even if there is that wouldn't necessarilly exclude a fortean cause.

Sollywos x
 
Jacket Potato:

As kids we often project our dream-selves into adult roles and situations (such as we understand them at a young age). I can recall childhood dreams in which I was 'me', but playing a role (e.g., soldier; fantasy hero) in which I was equipped and acting as an adult (or at least my impressions of what adulthood and adult capabilities were).

Could it be that you were grappling with a dawning awareness of eventual adult marriage from your youthful perspective, and the recurrent disturbing climax involving your own wedding day reflected a boundary condition, juncture, or impasse in your inner attempts to absorb the thought you were destined (doomed?) to face a wedding day at some point in your future?
 
Jacket Potato:

As kids we often project our dream-selves into adult roles and situations (such as we understand them at a young age). I can recall childhood dreams in which I was 'me', but playing a role (e.g., soldier; fantasy hero) in which I was equipped and acting as an adult (or at least my impressions of what adulthood and adult capabilities were).

Could it be that you were grappling with a dawning awareness of eventual adult marriage from your youthful perspective, and the recurrent disturbing climax involving your own wedding day reflected a boundary condition, juncture, or impasse in your inner attempts to absorb the thought you were destined (doomed?) to face a wedding day at some point in your future?
You may well be right - i'll let you know if i ever get there!

Dreams and semi waking states are a strange place of blurred lines & blended realities & definately think there are messages there - whether they come from within or somewhere else no one can say (i suspect both)
 
Here's the binoculars you're younger than me and as you've not yet had children your need is greater! (Just ask if he has a dad for me will you?) I suspect that we are far from alone skulking in the shadows avoiding the feminist mafia!

Anyway to return to the topic. Something that made me sit up and take notice of your dream was your describing it:-



Of the few precognitive dreams I've had that's the feeling I've woken up with. I've described it as 'that was not my dream' in that it didn't fall into place with my waking concerns as normal dreams do. It's just a 'knowing' and as such can't be put under any scientific scrutiny. Each time I've made sure to tell my partner of the time, I guess as I'm partnerless now I'd have to post it on here to provide the evidence, well such as it is, it still wouldn't be proof of anything really. It's been many years since it happened though so don't hold your breath!

So yep who knows where that dream came from ..... maybe even as a warning from your future self? Maybe there is a mundane explaination but even if there is that wouldn't necessarilly exclude a fortean cause.

Sollywos x
What were your precognitive dreams (if you don't mind saying of course) & did they have a different feel from ordinary dreams?
 
Something I'd been wondering about a day or two ago and which may or may not be pertinent to this thread, is at what point did we really understand what dreams are? When did we first 'get' that dreams are stories in our head while asleep and different from waking life?

What I do know is that I've always dreamed vividly and on awaking would relate them (which would have cemented them into my memory of course) to my younger sister and she in turn would tell me hers. It's wasn't until we were adults with children of our own that she 'fessed up to me that at the time she had no idea what I meant by 'dreaming' as she didn't have any! She thought I was making up stories on the hoof and had real trouble keeping up with me. It wasn't until she started remembering her own dreams a few years later that she realised I'd done all the work in advance while still asleep and therefore wasn't as clever as she'd thought I was! :)

I can however remember the very nightmare, one I'd had before so I guess that gave me the hint that this was just a dream and that all I'd got to do to escape the menace that was chasing me was wake up. I reasoned that as I was really asleep with my eyes shut all I'd got to do to was to open my dreaming eyes as wide as I could! That's not to say that I often have lucid dreams but that was the first one and I would have been 7 or 8 ish. Ah would that we could escape real life nightmares so easily!!!

But it's just occured to me, maybe some of the things that I think I can remember from childhood were actually dreams and vice versa? I think I know the difference but do I? I remember much more of our childhood than my sister can. Ah the wonders of the human brain and the fallability of memory!

Sollywos x
 
What were your precognitive dreams (if you don't mind saying of course) & did they have a different feel from ordinary dreams?

I've only told one of them so far:-

https://forums.forteana.org/index.php?threads/dreams-that-have-come-true.18201/page-7#post-1830301

I'll post the others when I get one of those roundtuit thingies, I'm off for an early night now so maybe tomorrow one will come in the mail lol.

The dreams themselves don't feel any different from normal dreams it's the waking up moment that has a different feel as in 'that was not my dream'. Usually they are the 'snap awake' variety which can occur with normal dreams as well of course, rather than the drift awake sort. :)

btw I do acknowledge that they could well be common or garden coincidences rather than precognitive but that's the thing about forteana stuff the subjective experience has to be open to scrutiny if we are ever to get to the bottom of it. That's what is so good about this forum there is always someone who can come along with a different perspective that you might not have considered yourself.

Sollywos x
 
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