• We have updated the guidelines regarding posting political content: please see the stickied thread on Website Issues.

Courtroom Antics & Trial Oddities

A very NSFW exchange in an American courtroom...

"F*ckman-Ass" Judge and "Donkey-Dicked" Murder Suspect Are America's Greatest Comic Duo
Laurel and Hardy. Aykroyd and Belushi. Nixon and Haldeman. Soon these names will be joined by “Fuckman and Donkey Dick,” better known as Judge Bryant Durham and alleged killer Denver Allen, whose performance in a Georgia courtroom last week easily ranks them among America’s most legendary comedy teams.

Allen, accused of committing a deadly jailhouse beatdown last year, appeared in court on Friday seeking to represent himself, claiming his public defender said he would only do “a good job” if he was allowed to give Allen oral sex. Judge Durham advised him against it. Things quickly went downhill from there.
http://gawker.com/fuckman-ass-judge-and-donkey-dicked-murder-suspect-1782465086
 
Judge tells man 'you're a bit of a cunt yourself' as she jails him for vile racist insults

Vile John Hennigan, 50, was being sentenced by Judge Patricia Lynch QC when he told her she was "a bit of a c***"

But, taking no prisoners, the judge immediately retorted: "You are a bit of a c*** yourself. Being offensive to me doesn't help."

Hennigan shouted back: "Go f*** yourself."

"You too," replied the judge.

Judge Lynch dropped the C-bomb as she jailed Hennigan for 18 months for insulting a black Caribbean mother.

The court heard Hennigan has 23 convictions for 47 offences, many of them involving Nazi salutes and racist incidents.

The latest offence, committed in his hometown of Harlow, Essex, was his ninth breach of an ASBO banning him from acting in an anti social way or using racist language.

In October 2012 he was seen performing a Nazi salute in a central London pub and calling black people vile racial slurs.

Following their c-word exchange Hennigan banged on the glass panel of the dock, performed a Nazi salute and twice shouted "Sieg Heil" before starting to sing "Jews gas them all...."

Judge Lynch, still speaking in a measured tone, commented: "We are all really impressed. Take him down."

Yet he looks such a lovely fella.

PAY-John-Hennigan.jpg
 
Well done, that judge! Man's a major tosser.
 
‘Disciple of Jesus Christ’ is not an occupation, judge rules
Justice upholds Central Office of the High Court’s decision not to accept statement

about 22 hours ago
Saurya Cherfi

High Court was entirely correct in refusing to accept a sworn statement in which a litigant described his occupation as “a disciple of the Lord Jesus Christ”, a judge has ruled.

Mr Justice Richard Humphreys said the litigant, who had sought to “duplicitously” challenge in the High Court a decision by the Residential Tenancies Board to fix a market rent for his tenancy, had issued “frivolous, grandiose and vexatious” proceedings.

“The courts are not a playground in which litigants can amuse themselves at will.

“For the court to bask in self-congratulatory patience for quirky insouciance of applicants would be to play the role of a judicial free-rider,” the judge said in a reserved judgment.

The judge said the man and another tenant had sought leave to apply for judicial review to quash the Residential Tenancies Board’s determination.

The application had been filed in the Central Office and the man had put further evidence in the sworn statement.

The Central Office had refused to accept the man’s affidavit, on the grounds that it did not comply with the rules of the court.

The judge said that, in his mind, “fanciful” descriptions such as “disciple of the Lord Jesus Christ” do not constitute a description of occupation.

“If such a mode of description were permitted, one could not stop the next deponent describing themselves in the opening of an affidavit as a ‘Guardian reader’ or the one after that as a ‘keen golfer’ and so on,” the judge said. ...

http://www.irishtimes.com/news/crim...st-is-not-an-occupation-judge-rules-1.2754383
 

Why I want to reclaim the C-word for myself
Judge under fire for using the C-word in court in response to swearing defendant

Thu, Aug 18, 2016, 01:05
Anthea McTeirnan

In this foul-mouthed world there is one word that still has the power to get people hot under the collar. It did in Britain last week, anyway.

John Hennigan (50), who had breached his anti-social behaviour order (Asbo) by using racist language towards a black woman and her two children, told Chelmsford crown court judge Patricia Lynch QC last week that she was “a bit of a c***”.

Judge Lynch replied, with learned accuracy: “You are a bit of a c*** yourself.”

When Hennigan screamed back “Go f*** yourself”, the judge replied: “You too.” (And no, neither of them used asterisks in this exchange).

Hennigan, who reportedly also shouted “Sieg Heil” and banged the glass panel of the dock, was jailed for 18 months. He got an Asbo in 2005 when a swastika was discovered daubed on the front door of his council house. Given the charge in front of Hennigan, and his own linguistic choices, Judge Lynch’s use of base language sounded quite eloquent. She is now a hero in any language.

In spite of her social media hero status, Lynch has incurred the wrath of Britain’s Judicial Conduct Investigations Office, which handles complaints made about judges both in and outside court. The body reported that it had received a number of complaints about the incident. They have not reported if their response will be a Hennigan-inspired “Go f*** yourself” as their verdict is not yet in.

Damage
The “C-word”, as we must refer to it, if only to smuggle it past The Irish Times’ firewall, has been resting outside the firewall of the modern vernacular for a long time.
Never has a four-letter word f***ed with so many heads. No, not even the F-word has done such damage.

In 1796 Francis Grose said the C-word was “a nasty name for a nasty thing”. Almost four centuries later, the Oxford English Dictionary explains the word’s commonest contexts as both “female external genital organs” and as a “term of vulgar abuse”. ...

http://www.irishtimes.com/opinion/w...est&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=news_digest
 
Judge's 'LOL' as he jails online boaster who ducked sentence
Share
_90938007_mediaitem90938005.jpg
Image copyrightFACEBOOK
A man who avoided prison after being convicted of a street attack has been jailed for refusing to perform unpaid work, then boasting about it online.

David Newlands, 24, was given 150 hours community service for punching a vulnerable man in Glasgow last year.

He refused to perform the unpaid work and was twice given another chance.

Judge Norman Ritchie jailed Newlands for nine months after hearing he posted on Facebook: "I'm out bro, easy." The judge added: "As they say, LOL."

'Beast' slur
Newlands, who is currently serving an eight-month sentence for assault and breach of the peace, will serve the latest sentence when his current sentence ends.

Newlands was among eight people who ended up in court after Mr Miller, an innocent man who has learning difficulties, was called "a beast" and chased until he threw himself out of a flat window.

During that hearing at the High Court in Glasgow in January, judge Ritchie described the group as "a pack of animals".

Newlands, from Glasgow, was given a community sentence but refused to carry out unpaid work.

The court heard that he later posted on Facebook: "A got a high court conviction n they never sent me eh jail instead gave me a community order ..told them to stick it...so got sent back to court n what do they dae?

"The judge says mr Newlands I would refer to you as an idiot..n then what does he dae? He geez me it again...probation am no dayn it simple!!!"

After being returned to court, Newlands admitted breaching the order.

Judge Ritchie told him: "It's always interesting to see a different view on sentencing as in 'I'm out bro easy.' As they say lol."

The judge added: "I gave you two chances. You didn't take the chances. I hope you don't think I'm doing this out of anger. In truth it enlivened what was otherwise a dull day."

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-glasgow-west-37195836
 
yes. And then compulsory something or other training when he was out. Which might not stick but would seriously piss him off!
 
It's "Oui!" "Ja!" and "Thank you, sir, may I have another!" for nine months. :clap:

The fact that he looks like a trainee-estate-agent will probably not put them off.
 
Trial by fire: Lawyer's pants set ablaze during arson case

The Associated Pres
Associated PressMarch 9, 2017


MIAMI (AP) — A Miami defense attorney is feeling the heat after his pants caught fire Wednesday after he told jurors during arguments in an arson case that his client's car spontaneously combusted and wasn't intentionally set.

As he started speaking to the jury, Stephen Gutierrez, 28, said he noticed his pocket began to feel hot.

"When I checked my pocket, I noticed that the heat was coming from a small e-cigarette battery I had in my pocket," Gutierrez told The Associated Press via email on Thursday afternoon. He said he had two to three of the batteries in his right pocket.

The Miami Herald (http://hrld.us/2m4lhIE ) reported Gutierrez was arguing that his client's car spontaneously combusted and wasn't intentionally set on fire.

Gutierrez said he quickly left the courtroom and went to a courthouse bathroom.

"I was able to toss the battery in water after it singed my pocket open," he said.

Gutierrez said the incident was not staged. "No one thinks that a battery left in their pocket is somehow going to 'explode,'" he wrote.

The lawyer ran out of the courtroom and the judge also had the jurors taken to the jury room.

When Gutierrez returned to the courtroom unharmed, he insisted it wasn't a staged defense gone wrong. Later in the day his client, Claudy Charles, 48, was convicted of second-degree arson.

Prosecutors and the Miami-Dade police are investigating the incident. Investigators seized frayed e-cigarette batteries as evidence.

Miami-Dade Circuit Judge Michael Hanzman also could decide to hold Gutierrez in contempt of court.

Gutierrez told the AP that he researched e-cigarette batteries and learned that they can be "extremely dangerous."

"The dangers of these devices, and accessories, have led me to quit using e-cigarette products," he wrote. "At the end of the day, all of these stories and incidents involve real people in real situations. I hope we do not forget that."

___

Information from: The Miami Herald, http://www.herald.com

https://www.yahoo.com/news/defense-lawyers-pants-catch-fire-during-trial-miami-145025890.html
 
Judge who told complainant to 'keep your knees together' resigns

A Canadian judge who asked a sexual assault complainant why she could not "keep your knees together" is resigning.
Alberta Federal Court Justice Robin Camp's decision came after a scathing Canadian Judicial Council review called for his removal.
The review concluded he acted in a manner that seriously undermined public confidence in the judiciary.
The federal justice minister has accepted his resignation.

Mr Camp's comments made during a 2014 rape trial sparked outrage and drew sharp criticism from sexual assault victims and their advocates.
The judge had tried to hold on to his position and told the Council he had undergone education and had apologised for his comments.

The Council, which oversees the judiciary, found that Mr Camp's actions during the trial were "so manifestly and profoundly destructive of the concept of impartiality, integrity and independence of the judicial role that public confidence is sufficiently undermined to render the Judge incapable of executing the judicial office".

It also found he spoke to the complainant in a manner "that was at times condescending, humiliating and disrespectful".

etc...

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-39224844
 
Truro woman has spent every year for almost five decades proving she is alive and this is why

By WBCaroline | Posted: May 01, 2017

This woman has had to prove she is alive every year for almost five decades and has even had to enlist the help of court magistrates.
Former show jumper Marie Glover has to prove she is "alive and kicking" so that she can receive a "small" insurance pay-out following a horrific riding accident in Belgium.
The bizarre request is made by a Belgian insurance company following an accident the 69-year-old had when she was teenager.

The pensioner, from Blackwater, was working in the country as a show jumper when the horse she was riding bucked.
"I was about 19 or 20 years-old when it happened," she told Cornwall Live.
As Marie was thrown she tried to escape being trampled on by the horse, but landed on her foot, which caused serious injuries.
She said: "At the time they said I would be lucky if I walked properly again. I totally smashed all the bones in my foot and broke my ankle."

It was only through perseverance and getting back on a horse that allowed Marie to walk again.
If Marie can't receive proof that she is alive from a magistrate she must travel to the Belgium Consulate in London and present herself in the flesh.

"I had a friend who was a JP (Justice of the Peace) and she used to take it to the court once a year. Obviously because I worked with her she knew that I was alive.
"They're so good at the magistrates' court and I am so grateful to them. I think they find it quite humorous when I stand there and tell them I'm alive and produce my driving licence and my passport. I tell them I still have a pulse and they stamp and sign my form.
"I'm very much alive and kicking. I'm definitely here although I do get aches and pains, but what can you do?"

Mike Bird, who works for law firm Foot Anstey, said: "For some types of payments where an insurance company is paying you annually it's quite common for some proof to be required that the person receiving the benefit of the money is alive.
"In the UK this can usually be dealt with by a doctor, but no doubt the Belgium authorities require some form of authoritative proof that this lady is alive before they can make a payment."

The original forms are then sent off to the insurance firm in Belgium.
Her most recent request for verification of life was made on April 19 at Truro Magistrates' Court.

http://www.cornwalllive.com/this-wo...-this-is-why/story-30300036-detail/story.html
 
Derry man head-butted himself: court told

16:30 Wednesday 17th of June 2015
A Derry man who smashed a window “head-butted his own reflection”, Derry Magistrates Court heard today.

The court was told Gerard McGaughey, of Rosskeen Park, was drunk when he committed the offence in a city centre bar on May 2, causing over £500 of damage.

The court was told he could not remember what happened.

“The whole sorry incident is captured on CCTV,” defence solicitor Seamus Quigley told the court.

“The prosecution suggest he turned around and was almost spooked by his own reflection in the door.

“If the prosecution theory is correct, he may be fortunate that he is not charged with attempted assault.”

McGaughey pleaded guilty to criminal damage and was ordered to pay £548.40 compensation to the bar and was given a two year conditional discharge.

https://www.derrynow.com/news/derry-man-head-butted-himself-court-told/32904
 
Trump court nominee "not qualified", bur he is a paranormal investigator

President Trump's pick to be a federal district judge in Alabama has written about paranormal activities, according to a new report.

Brett Talley said he was part of The Tuscaloosa Paranormal Research Group between 2009 and 2010, according to a Senate Judiciary Committee questionnaire obtained by The Daily Beast.

The group says on its website it is "searching for the truth of the paranormal existence" and helps those who may be "living with paranormal activity that can be disruptive and/or traumatic." ...

Talley has also written books on the subject, including one called "Haunted Tuscaloosa" with Higdon.

"In the pages of this book, you will hear tales of haunted houses and shadows moving through university buildings,” the authors wrote in the book.

“We will enter abandoned insane asylums, antebellum homes and ancient cemeteries. We will review stories of long-dead Civil War soldiers, of women driven insane by the death of loves and of some leading lights of Tuscaloosa who still walk in the massive homes they constructed." ...

Talley has faced scrutiny after he was approved by the Senate Judiciary Committee despite having never tried a case.

A report Monday said he did not disclose that he is married to a White House lawyer who has been interviewed as part of special counsel Robert Mueller's investigation into Russian election meddling. Talley is married to Ann Donaldson, the chief of staff to the White House counsel. Talley did not include this information on a Senate questionnaire when asked about conflicts of interests, according to The New York Times.

Talley was also deemed unqualified by the American Bar Association.

http://thehill.com/homenews/adminis...ial-nominee-wrote-about-paranormal-activities
 
But ... Did the Santeria(?) 'work' for whomever it was intended to help? :dunno:

Headless chickens found in Connecticut courtroom
Authorities in Connecticut are investigating the discovery of two decapitated chickens inside a courtroom.

Judicial marshals and maintenance staff investigating a putrid smell made the grisly discovery Wednesday morning in the public seating area of a courtroom in a state courthouse in Bridgeport.

The headless chickens were under a bench.

Authorities say the carcasses were decorated in silver, green and gold glitter. There was no immediate indication how the decapitated chickens got there ...


The Connecticut Post reports that decapitated chickens have been found outside city courthouses before, but never inside. The placement of decapitated chickens is used in Santeria, an Afro-Caribbean religion, to protect a person from being found guilty of a crime.

SOURCE: https://apnews.com/9ccf55bd479042a09bb9f271d9d4f308/Headless-chickens-found-in-Connecticut-courtroom
 
This could fit in a few threads.

Doctor ran up $135,000 tab with 4 ‘fishing’ strippers. A judge says he’s off the hook
BY ADAM DARBY January 21, 2018 03:31 PM Updated 9 hours 49 minutes ago

A cardiologist who racked up a $135,000 tab during a three-night spree with four strippers at a New York City club is off the hook for the bill, a Manhattan judge has ruled.

Physician Zyad Younan, of Holmdel, New Jersey, was drugged by the strippers and then fleeced with fraudulent billing, Judge O’Neill Levy ruled Tuesday. Therefore, Younan was the victim of “criminal conduct” and is not responsible for the tab, Fox News reports.

Scores, the Midtown club where Younan was charged for private rooms, tips and booze over three nights in November 2013 — tried to collect on the tab in court even after the strippers pleaded guilty to the scam. ...

http://www.miamiherald.com/news/nation-world/national/article195864649.html
 
He had studied law at a Ukrainian University, yeah right.

A Nigerian man pretending to be a solicitor for 15 years is to be charged for impersonation, the police say.

The 49-year-old man was arrested earlier this week as he was making a bail application for his client in a Lagos state court.

Police spokesman Chike Oti told the BBC the man could not articulate his legal argument and was challenged by another lawyer present in court.

The suspect, who is due to appear in court on Friday, has not commented.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-43002700?ocid=socialflow_twitter
 
Sounds like something from The Simpsons.

A town in Iowa has agreed to drop a lawsuit against a resident who criticised officials because the place smells like "rancid dog food".

A federal court sided with web developer Josh Harms, issuing a permanent injunction ordering Sibley, Iowa, officials not to sue him.

Sibley officials threatened legal action over Mr Harms' website 'Should You Move to Sibley, Iowa?'

Mr Harms argued the threat was a violation of his right to free speech.

The town contacted Mr Harms in December 2017 and told him he had 10 days to remove his website, or they would take him to court.

On the site, the web developer had described his hometown as having a "horrible rotten-blood and stale-beer odour that hangs over the town".

The odour in question is coming from a pork blood processing plant.

On 9 March 2018, the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) of Iowa filed a lawsuit against Sibley, arguing it had violated Mr Harms's constitutional right to criticise the government without fear of repercussion.

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-43598832
 
'Who killed you?'
The jurors who used a Ouija board to find a murderer guilty

By [URL='http://www.abc.net.au/news/abc-local/michael-dulaney/6837642']Michael Dulaney
and Damien Carrick for The Law Report
Posted Tue at 7:00am

In 1994, English insurance broker Stephen Young was found guilty of the gruesome double murder of Harry and Nicola Fuller. When the sentence came down, Sussex Police detective Graham Hill believed justice had been served.

The couple had been found dead on the floor of their home a year earlier, with Nicola shot three times and Harry shot in the back at close range.

The lead investigator on the case, Mr Hill said the verdict, which followed a five-week jury trial, marked the end of a difficult period.

"There was relief the case was finished," he said. "Obviously all people that are involved in the prosecution were pleased the verdict was one of guilty, because there's...as you can imagine, a huge amount of work goes into that."


One month after the trial had concluded, a front page headline of the now-defunct News of the World newspaper appeared out of nowhere, and hit like a shot:

'Murder Jury's Ouija Board Verdict': 'Booze, Dirty Jokes and then the Ouija Board'.

The report quoted the youngest member of the jury, 24-year-old Adrian, who said four jurors had tried to consult the spirits of the dead while locked overnight in Brighton's Old Ship Hotel.

Continued:
http://www.abc.net.au/news/2018-05-08/ouija-board-juror-misbehaviour-murder-trials/9734868[/URL]
 
Last edited by a moderator:
I did jury service a few years ago, it was a case of GBH after a threesome involving a married couple with a male friend, the wife and male friend ended up in a relationship which led to an assault, pretty crazy really!
 
Back
Top