Doctors Advise: Do Not Put Frozen Potatoes In Your Anus

[Comfortably Numb]

This does add a new dimensions to that age old cry of "arse biscuits"!

Aye and I suppose some of you will find this potato funny, as well... nick:

 

[Krepostnoi]

"arse biscuits"

The perfect accompaniment to a nice cup of civet coffee.

 

[Ascalon]

Aye and I suppose some of you will find this potato funny, as well... nick:

View attachment 23695

Funny, you say?
Er, no. Not funny, exactly.

I've always liked yoga pants...

 

[Comfortably Numb]

I've always liked yoga pants...

Oh, we're all being, 'smarty pants' as well today, are we...

Well here's a new, big word, you can all use to impress next time this conversation comes up...
oet:

 

[CuriousIdent]

Who needs access to Anusol when you could just buy a bag of McCain from the frozen section for half the price!

 

[hunck]

I know that we had a discussion on ice dildos somewhere on this site (made by freezing water filled condoms).

And I remember the Romans using peeled ginger root as a punishment instead of radish. (Did Roman's have ginger?)

Shoving ginger up a horses arse before a race was done in the past, so I've read. Gives 'em a gee up.

 

[Trevp666]

There's surely a missing step here: shouldn't the slices be tapered, at least a little?

How about 'wedges'?

 

[Spookdaddy]

Just hold it right there one second.

Someone please tell me that Warburtons Oven Bottom Muffins are in fact muffins that are baked in the bottom of the oven!!

 

[escargot]

Who needs access to Anusol when you could just buy a bag of McCain from the frozen section for half the price!

Then eat them afterwards!

 

[David Plankton]

One for the crossword fans. Did you know, that the Latin name for the potato, Solanum Tuberosum, is an anagram of To bumm anus rsoul?

Right, I've obviously got better things I could be doing.

 

[JamesWhitehead]

For a true King Edward experience, they should really be piping hot! sych:

 

[Comfortably Numb]

Holy spud!!!

This has to be one the most unconvincing excuses ever... :bish:

https://metro-co-uk.cdn.ampproject....3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com&amp_tf=From%20%251%24s

 

[escargot]

To bumm anus rsoul

That's my next tattoo, right there.

 

[RaM]

Think I will take the doctors advice on this one,
but it would be rude to wast the suds, so where's the chip pan.

 

[Vardoger]

Holy spud!!!

This has to be one the most unconvincing excuses ever... :bish:

https://metro-co-uk.cdn.ampproject.org/v/s/metro.co.uk/2008/10/31/vicar-hospitalised-with-potato-up-his-bum-95117/amp/?amp_js_v=a2&amp_gsa=1&usqp=mq331AQCKAE=#aoh=15829211267809&amp_ct=1582921167594&referrer=https://www.google.com&amp_tf=From %1$s&ampshare=https://metro.co.uk/2008/10/31/vicar-hospitalised-with-potato-up-his-bum-95117/amp/#aoh=15829211267809&amp_ct=1582921167594&referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com&amp_tf=From%20%251%24s

How about linking directly to the news site, instead?

 

[escargot]

Holy spud!!!

This has to be one the most unconvincing excuses ever... :bish:

https://metro-co-uk.cdn.ampproject.org/v/s/metro.co.uk/2008/10/31/vicar-hospitalised-with-potato-up-his-bum-95117/amp/?amp_js_v=a2&amp_gsa=1&usqp=mq331AQCKAE=#aoh=15829211267809&amp_ct=1582921167594&referrer=https://www.google.com&amp_tf=From %1$s&ampshare=https://metro.co.uk/2008/10/31/vicar-hospitalised-with-potato-up-his-bum-95117/amp/#aoh=15829211267809&amp_ct=1582921167594&referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com&amp_tf=From%20%251%24s

Anyone who works in hospitals has heard these yarns. You never get to the bottom of them.

 

[kamalktk]

Not crinkle cut then?

They're called "ribbed for your pleasure", thank you very much.

 

[kamalktk]

Don't try to yam them up there.

 

[David Plankton]

That's my next tattoo, right there.

I missed out an 'e'. I tried to insert it satisfactorily but just couldn't squeeze it in.

 

[escargot]

I missed out an 'e'. I tried to insert it satisfactorily but just couldn't squeeze it in.

That's me immortalised on the 'Misspelt Latin Tattoos' page, then.

 

[David Plankton]

That's me immortalised on the 'Misspelt Latin Tattoos' page, then.

Never mind, kay sirrah, sirrah, grab the carp and all that.

 

[Comfortably Numb]

How about linking directly to the news site, instead?

Genuinely had a 'to do' note for exactly that, in future.

One of the issues has been by doing so, you would sometimes lose a commentary on the original article.

However, especially with science related material, which you are alerted to via a news feed, the corresponding links seem to be increasingly, ridiculously, long.

Shall see how this goes then.

 

[Comfortably Numb]

One shall be having nightmares...

Originally posted (attached) image was too large.
It's been replaced with a version that is 62.5% of the original's size.​

 

[RaM]

Don’t know about prostate trouble but just looking at it would make me forget piles and cure constipation instantly

 

[Yithian]

One shall be having nightmares...

View attachment 23762
Originally posted (attached) image was too large.
It's been replaced with a version that is 62.5% of the original's size.​

Reminds me of:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pear_of_anguish

 

[Comfortably Numb]

Reminds me of...

It seems I am suddenly having an issue with the size of attachments.

Can't see what on earth has changed - why?

All looks fine from my side.

Will not be uploading any more until I figure this out - thanks for taking the time to help.

Yours sincerely,

Completely Baffled.

 

[maximus otter]

Reminds me of:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pear_of_anguish

On a not-dissimilar note, it reminds me of the Butt-Out tool used by some US deer hunters:

Note: I wouldn't advise a Google image search using the term "Butt-Out" if you are just about to eat. Or have just eaten. Or intend to eat again at any point in your life.

maximus otter

 

[JamesWhitehead]

Oh dear! There are Butt-Out videos on Youtube. I suspect I will get them in my in-tray for ever, now! I especially like the one where the hunter gets shy about showing the insertion of his tool!

The reassuring news is that, so far, the intended beast, only, has featured.

As for the metal monster . . . it looks like a designer lemon-squeezer!

 

[escargot]

It seems I am suddenly having an issue with the size of attachments.

Can't see what on earth has changed - why?

All looks fine from my side.

Will not be uploading any more until I figure this out - thanks for taking the time to help.

Yours sincerely,

Completely Baffled.

It's all in the cut.

 

[Comfortably Numb]

On a not-dissimilar note, it reminds me of the Butt-Out tool used by some US deer hunters:

Whilst investing this quite fascinating discovery, my 'butt stop' Google query was directed to yet another new terminology.

Truly educational, the things one learns here.

'Swamp Ass'...

https://www.menshealth.com/style/a19530453/swamp-ass/