Expressing Measurements Via Analogies / Comparisons

[Trevp666]

I just spent time creating a 'keep 2 ponies apart' sign, before realising that it would be incorrect as it should read '40 ponies', but couldn't be arsed to re-do it.
Imagine it says "Keep apart 2 herds of ponies"

 

[Floyd1]

being laid out by a size 8 to the testicles or anus 40 times consecutively.

On that note, have you noticed how the link to this thread reads 'Expressing Measurements Via Anal....' ?
Childish I know, but it made me laugh.

 

[Trevp666]

You must be using a large font size

 

[Floyd1]

You must be using a large font size

Ah, yes, right. -The old eyesight's been getting worse lately so I do use a larger font. I keep threatening to stop using my phone as much (which definitely makes it worse), but my willpower isn't too strong.

 

[Trevp666]

Try reducing your font size to one that makes the letters the same size as a single grain of pearl barley from about 6 bananas away, that should be about right.

 

[ChasFink]

Let us not forget the following, once popular in the computer science world:

attoparsec = approx. 3.086 cm or 1.215 in.
microfortnight = 1.2096 seconds
millihelen = the amount of beauty required to launch one ship

 

[Trevp666]

Ahah! A new measurement standard, "The Shard" (because of course we all know that The Shard is 310 metres high, don't we)

Asteroid four times as big as the Shard set to cross paths with Earth
https://metro.co.uk/2022/02/28/aste...e-shard-will-cross-paths-with-earth-16188740/

Despite the fact that "the asteroid, ... has an estimated diameter in the range of 560 – 1300 meters".
So it really should be described as having a diameter up to slightly more than 4 times the height of the Shard.

 

[maximus otter]

Ahah! A new measurement standard, "The Shard" (because of course we all know that The Shard is 310 metres high, don't we)

Asteroid four times as big as the Shard set to cross paths with Earth
https://metro.co.uk/2022/02/28/aste...e-shard-will-cross-paths-with-earth-16188740/

Despite the fact that "the asteroid, ... has an estimated diameter in the range of 560 – 1300 meters".
So it really should be described as having a diameter up to slightly more than 4 times the height of the Shard.

So: something a bit bigger than something whose size l don’t know, is going to be no closer than three million miles away, at some point?

It doesn’t take much to get Metro readers to crap themselves, does it?



maximus otter

 

[Trevp666]

no closer than three million miles away

Or 545,602 Mount Everests away.

 

[Yithian]

Is this a new unit in the U.S. system of Imperial measurements?

 

[Ronnie Jersey]

Is this a new unit in the U.S. system of Imperial measurements?

View attachment 52641View attachment 52642

That poor child! Thank God he's been rescued!!

 

[ChasFink]

Is this a new unit in the U.S. system of Imperial measurements?

View attachment 52641View attachment 52642

How many Ariana Pequeñas are in an Ariana Grande?

 

[Mikefule]

How many Ariana Pequeñas are in an Ariana Grande?

I don't know. I've never understood most of these trendy new names for hipster coffee. Only black filter coffee for me.

 

[Alchymist]

Seems to me that the favourite unit in the U.S. system of measurements is the Football Field. How often do we read headlines such as "New aircraft carrier as long as 15 football fields, says navy captain", and similar?

 

[Trevp666]

We couldn't really use a UK 'football field' as a measurement, only in a vague approximation of area, as there is no set standard size for one in the first place.
I've heard 'Wembley Stadium' used as a specific 'football field' size though. Both in terms of the size of the pitch and/or the capacity of the stands.

 

[Victory]

I like "By a whisker"

But is that whisker....

a sporting 1980's Alan Lamb type moustache?

or

a Wilf Lunn extravaganza?

 

[Trevp666]

Ah yes, approximately about the size of a 'hairs breadth'.

 

[Xanatic*]

Or a hare's breath.

 

[BlackPeter]

On that note, have you noticed how the link to this thread reads 'Expressing Measurements Via Anal....' ?
Childish I know, but it made me laugh.

Me too

 

[Victory]

Or a hare's breath.

https://grammarist.com/eggcorns/hairs-breadth/

To quote:

"A hair’s breadth is a very short distance.

Breadth in this phrase is synonymous with width, so the phrase literally refers to the width of a hair.

Hare’s breath

and

hair’s breath

are interesting images, but for the phrase denoting a short distance, they are misspellings."

 

[Trevp666]

Don't treat him like an escaped goat.

 

[Floyd1]

 

[Ascalon]

Hare's breath!
I like that.
Not sure where it would come up in comparative measures though.

"His lung capacity has not improved much, has it?"
"No, not by a hare's breath."

 

[Spookdaddy]

Is this a new unit in the U.S. system of Imperial measurements?..

It's clearly based on the Aristotelian theory regarding the close relationship between mathematics and music.

The people in that story should thank their lucky stars that they aren’t some bloke in Florida whose just had his prize pomeranian eaten by an alligator the size of four late model Pavarottis and a Mama Cass.

 

[joeosker]

I know that the measurment of one " Steve" is 5 foot 8 because we used him to meausure a small office

 

[Bigphoot2]

The Daily Mail has introduced a new unit of astronomical measurement - the Giraffe.

 

[maximus otter]

I know that the measurment of one " Steve" is 5 foot 8 because we used him to meausure a small office

Harvard University beat you to it with the Smoot.

maximus otter

 

[maximus otter]

The Daily Mail has introduced a new unit of astronomical measurement - the Giraffe.

View attachment 53099

l quoted this to my wife. Her response: “Which half?”

Anne Elk lives.

maximus otter

 

[Analogue Boy]

The Daily Mail has introduced a new unit of astronomical measurement - the Giraffe.

View attachment 53099

This is great news. Now we can measure how far away The Moon is EXACTLY.

 

[Trevp666]

The Daily Mail has introduced a new unit of astronomical measurement - the Giraffe.

Ridiculous.
Impossible Engineering has been using the giraffe as a unit of measurement (for height) for years.
And why only half a giraffe anyway? Is it because it rhymes?
I mean they could have said that it was as big as a horse, of course.