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Fortean Headlines

The answer my friend, is blowing in the wind...

Congregation Claims Pastor Farts In Their Faces To Heal Them

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The congregation of a church in South Africa are claiming their pastor sits on people and farts on them as a means of healing and blessing them.
Pastor Christ Penelope of SevenFold Holy Spirit Ministries in Siyandani Village in Giyani, Limpopo, has been accused of farting on his congregants.
Photos reportedly show the pastor sitting or standing on top of people, with people claiming he breaks wind on them.
However, the pastor refutes the remarks that have been circulating on social media, having simply said, according to The Daily Sun: "I don't fart on people - I heal people."
https://www.ladbible.com/news/news-...or-farts-in-their-faces-to-heal-them-20210320
 
I love his slacks!
Wish I could find some in my size.
 
‘Micropig’ living in family home after reaching 20 stone

Francisco, a Vietnamese potbellied cross, was falsely sold to a family from Glasgow as a micropig

STV News
15th Mar, 2021

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A giant pig weighing 20 stone is living in a house – after being bought as a micropig.

Francisco, a three-and-a-half year old Vietnamese potbellied cross, was falsely sold as a micropig, but had an Instagram account which caught the eye of a 15-year-old girl.

The teen begged her parents for the cute piglet and the family, from Glasgow, travelled down to England to buy him – but three months later he was given to an animal sanctuary.

But he now weighs 20 stone, twice the weight of a healthy adult, and is 1.2m long.

https://news.stv.tv/west-central/micropig-living-in-family-home-after-reaching-20-stone?noq


Definitely not a 'micropig'!

 
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The answer my friend, is blowing in the wind...

Congregation Claims Pastor Farts In Their Faces To Heal Them

View attachment 37083



https://www.ladbible.com/news/news-...or-farts-in-their-faces-to-heal-them-20210320

"Pastor Christ Penelope of SevenFold Holy Spirit Ministries in Siyandani Village in Giyani, Limpopo . . . "

We don't hear nearly enough about Limpopo. In fact, I have heard nothing at all about it, since primary school, when Kipling was still taught.

" In the story, a young elephant sets off on a journey and comes “to the banks of the great grey-green greasy Limpopo River, all set about with fever trees”." What a memorable sentence, though it may suggest expensive tonic water these days!

The river isn't at all greasy, according to this page!

As for the farting reverend, "Pastor Christ Penelope!" is an exclamation that nicely skirts blasphemy. :evil:
 
Could he be indulging a fetish under cover of The Lord?

I have heard of very large ladies who make some kind of living by sitting on faces. Maybe it came up in unusual tax claims.

I suppose the fetish is mainly the receiver's.

Mind you, the longer you sit, getting paid for it, the more attractive it must become. :thought:
 
I have heard of very large ladies who make some kind of living by sitting on faces. Maybe it came up in unusual tax claims.

I suppose the fetish is mainly the receiver's.

Mind you, the longer you sit, getting paid for it, the more attractive it must become. :thought:

Reminds me of a Monty Python song that will go unlinked to here.
 
Vampire squid ancestor died in 'eternal embrace' with its dinner

About 180 million years ago, an eight-armed predator seized its underwater prey — another eight-armed beastie — and began to nibble on it, until disaster struck and they both died from suffocation, a new study finds.

The shale slab holding this duo's fossilized remains preserved imprints of their soft tissues in "exceptional" detail ... An analysis of the slab reveals that their last moments together ended in an "eternal embrace ..."

Both of the ancient creatures are members of Octobrachia, a group of eight-armed cephalopods that includes the octopus, argonaut (deep-sea shelled octopus also known as the paper nautilus) and vampire squid — an animal that got its eerie name from its cape-like skin that connects its arms, but is neither a blood-sucker nor a squid. In particular, both of the Jurassic animals are vampyromorphs, ancient relatives of the modern-day vampire squid (Vampyroteuthis infernalis) ...

FULL STORY: https://www.livescience.com/jurassic-predator-prey-suffocated.html
 
Link to the story

Headline: 90,000 greasy pennies dumped on Georgia man's drive as final payment after quitting his job


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Gist of the story: Chap leaves job on bad terms. Employer pays him $915 in pennies contaminated with grease. Chap spends ages cleaning them.

In a meaningless Fortean coincidence, the total value of the coins is £666 according to the article. (I haven't checked the exchange rate.)

This happened in America, but this sort of stunt could be challenged if it happened in the UK as this amount of copper coinage is not "legal tender". I remembered the gist of this from my basic English law training many years ago but looked it up today:

Edited extract from Wikipedia:
At the introduction of decimal currency, and the Coinage Act, 1971, laid down that coins denominated above 10 pence became legal tender for payment not exceeding 10 pounds, non-bronze coins denominated not more than 10 pence became legal tender for payment not exceeding 5 pounds, and bronze coins became legal tender for payment not exceeding 20 pence.

Throughout the United Kingdom, coins valued 1 Pound, 2 Pounds, and 5 Pounds Sterling are legal tender in unlimited amounts. Twenty pence pieces and fifty pence pieces are legal tender in amounts up to 10 pounds; five pence pieces and ten pence pieces are legal tender in amounts up to 5 pounds; and pennies and 2 pence coins are legal tender in amounts up to 20 pence.
 
The ‘USS Jellyfish’ emits strange radio waves from a distant galaxy cluster

Strange radio emissions from a distant galaxy cluster take the shape of a gigantic jellyfish, complete with head and tentacles. Moreover, the cosmic jellyfish emits only the lowest radio frequencies and can’t be detected at higher frequencies. The unusual shape and radio spectrum tell a tale of intergalactic gas washing over galaxies and gently revving up electrons spewed out by gargantuan black holes long ago, researchers report in the March 10 Astrophysical Journal.

Spanning 1.2 million light-years, the strange entity lies in Abell 2877, a cluster of galaxies 340 million light-years from Earth. Researchers have dubbed the object the USS Jellyfish, because of its ultra-steep spectrum, or USS, from low to high radio frequencies. ...

FULL STORY: https://www.sciencenews.org/article/uss-jellyfish-galaxy-cluster-strange-radio-waves
 
Link to the story

Headline: 90,000 greasy pennies dumped on Georgia man's drive as final payment after quitting his job

View attachment 37269

Gist of the story: Chap leaves job on bad terms. Employer pays him $915 in pennies contaminated with grease. Chap spends ages cleaning them.

In a meaningless Fortean coincidence, the total value of the coins is £666 according to the article. (I haven't checked the exchange rate.)

This happened in America, but this sort of stunt could be challenged if it happened in the UK as this amount of copper coinage is not "legal tender". I remembered the gist of this from my basic English law training many years ago but looked it up today:

Edited extract from Wikipedia:
At the introduction of decimal currency, and the Coinage Act, 1971, laid down that coins denominated above 10 pence became legal tender for payment not exceeding 10 pounds, non-bronze coins denominated not more than 10 pence became legal tender for payment not exceeding 5 pounds, and bronze coins became legal tender for payment not exceeding 20 pence.

Throughout the United Kingdom, coins valued 1 Pound, 2 Pounds, and 5 Pounds Sterling are legal tender in unlimited amounts. Twenty pence pieces and fifty pence pieces are legal tender in amounts up to 10 pounds; five pence pieces and ten pence pieces are legal tender in amounts up to 5 pounds; and pennies and 2 pence coins are legal tender in amounts up to 20 pence.
I think we’ve done that on another thread.
 
I saw it here earlier too, but don't recall that they were greasy though. Yuk.
 
feinman said:
No one wants to deal with toilet ghosts though... :thought:
https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/japans-bathroom-ghosts

I like Teke Teke. That one is especially creepy.

Creepy? Poor maligned things! Some of them are very helpful! Consider the Akename :
"While not seen as a particularly frightening creature, the image of a gross little sprite licking the dirt off of a tub is not exactly friendly."
What could e friendlier than someone who's willing to clean your tub for you?
 
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