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Funny And/Or Weird Happenings Whilst Drunk (Stoned; Tripping; Etc.)

I might have posted this before, apologies if I have. Whe; I was working nights on a male surgical ward we had a patient who had undergone bilateral stripping of varicose veins that afternoon. About 9pm I went to check he was ok, he was very deeply asleep, I was a bit concerned as he had had a general anaesthetic, so I persisted until waking him until I got a response. He suddenly jumped out of bed, legs bandaged up, theatre gown still in place, bare bottom sticking out, and he started running ... halfway around the hospital up and down the old fashioned nightingale wards ladies wards included. I was running after him with little chance of catching him, the staff on the other wards were stood sort of open mouthed. Anyway he found his way back to his bed, got in it, never said a word and fell asleep. After I washed my hands I put the towel in the bin in his room and there were 8 empty cans of special brew in there. The next morning he was sat very carefully in his chair, with his feet up on the stool.
 
I might have posted this before, apologies if I have. Whe; I was working nights on a male surgical ward we had a patient who had undergone bilateral stripping of varicose veins that afternoon. About 9pm I went to check he was ok, he was very deeply asleep, I was a bit concerned as he had had a general anaesthetic, so I persisted until waking him until I got a response. He suddenly jumped out of bed, legs bandaged up, theatre gown still in place, bare bottom sticking out, and he started running ... halfway around the hospital up and down the old fashioned nightingale wards ladies wards included. I was running after him with little chance of catching him, the staff on the other wards were stood sort of open mouthed. Anyway he found his way back to his bed, got in it, never said a word and fell asleep. After I washed my hands I put the towel in the bin in his room and there were 8 empty cans of special brew in there. The next morning he was sat very carefully in his chair, with his feet up on the stool.
He was possibly having a dream that involved running when you woke him.
 
A close friend and his Dad used to run a very large pub in South London. The pub had a big floor area and, with a jukebox or TV on and a lot of background chatter, it could be quite noisy. The dad used to have a lock-in some nights with a couple of close friends that resulted in him sleeping on one of the soft benches rather than making the long way up stairs to bed.
Just as he dropped off one night he heard a voice from the other side of the bar saying “I am the black knight challenge me”, he apparently jumped up startled before giving it up as a dream, settled down and tried to drop back off. After a period of time he heard the same voice with the same challenge. He fair flew upstairs to his bed and spent a restless night with thoughts of ghost, ghoulies and things that go bump in the night.
Next day he cautiously questioned his son about such matters and eventually spilled the beans, said what he heard and stated that he thought the pub was haunted.
My friend explained that they had just changed a number of the pubs fruit machines, one of the new ones had a Black Knight theme. If the fruit machine went idle for a period of time it would let out the challenge “I am the black knight challenge me”.
His dad felt like a complete Berk!
 
A close friend and his Dad used to run a very large pub in South London. The pub had a big floor area and, with a jukebox or TV on and a lot of background chatter, it could be quite noisy. The dad used to have a lock-in some nights with a couple of close friends that resulted in him sleeping on one of the soft benches rather than making the long way up stairs to bed.
Just as he dropped off one night he heard a voice from the other side of the bar saying “I am the black knight challenge me”, he apparently jumped up startled before giving it up as a dream, settled down and tried to drop back off. After a period of time he heard the same voice with the same challenge. He fair flew upstairs to his bed and spent a restless night with thoughts of ghost, ghoulies and things that go bump in the night.
Next day he cautiously questioned his son about such matters and eventually spilled the beans, said what he heard and stated that he thought the pub was haunted.
My friend explained that they had just changed a number of the pubs fruit machines, one of the new ones had a Black Knight theme. If the fruit machine went idle for a period of time it would let out the challenge “I am the black knight challenge me”.
His dad felt like a complete Berk!

Ha ha nice one
 
A close friend and his Dad used to run a very large pub in South London. The pub had a big floor area and, with a jukebox or TV on and a lot of background chatter, it could be quite noisy. The dad used to have a lock-in some nights with a couple of close friends that resulted in him sleeping on one of the soft benches rather than making the long way up stairs to bed.
Just as he dropped off one night he heard a voice from the other side of the bar saying “I am the black knight challenge me”, he apparently jumped up startled before giving it up as a dream, settled down and tried to drop back off. After a period of time he heard the same voice with the same challenge. He fair flew upstairs to his bed and spent a restless night with thoughts of ghost, ghoulies and things that go bump in the night.
Next day he cautiously questioned his son about such matters and eventually spilled the beans, said what he heard and stated that he thought the pub was haunted.
My friend explained that they had just changed a number of the pubs fruit machines, one of the new ones had a Black Knight theme. If the fruit machine went idle for a period of time it would let out the challenge “I am the black knight challenge me”.
His dad felt like a complete Berk!
LOL brilliant ..
 
I might have posted this before, apologies if I have. Whe; I was working nights on a male surgical ward we had a patient who had undergone bilateral stripping of varicose veins that afternoon. About 9pm I went to check he was ok, he was very deeply asleep, I was a bit concerned as he had had a general anaesthetic, so I persisted until waking him until I got a response. He suddenly jumped out of bed, legs bandaged up, theatre gown still in place, bare bottom sticking out, and he started running ... halfway around the hospital up and down the old fashioned nightingale wards ladies wards included. I was running after him with little chance of catching him, the staff on the other wards were stood sort of open mouthed. Anyway he found his way back to his bed, got in it, never said a word and fell asleep. After I washed my hands I put the towel in the bin in his room and there were 8 empty cans of special brew in there. The next morning he was sat very carefully in his chair, with his feet up on the stool.

So, the moral of the story is, special brew gives you super powers.
 
Back in the 80s I went out one night in a new jacket and trousers combo. White background with large black Chinese writing/characters all over it. At the end of the night we left the pubs behind and decided to have something to eat and so we went to a local Chinese Takeaway. That was when things began to get weird. The staff saw me and began jabbering away at each other and pointing at me yelling at me and pointing to the door. I felt freaked out. I left without ordering. It only dawned on me the next day that I had no idea what the meaning of the characters was and it could have been anything. I never wore it again I threw it away.
 
Back in the 80s I went out one night in a new jacket and trousers combo. White background with large black Chinese writing/characters all over it. At the end of the night we left the pubs behind and decided to have something to eat and so we went to a local Chinese Takeaway. That was when things began to get weird. The staff saw me and began jabbering away at each other and pointing at me yelling at me and pointing to the door. I felt freaked out. I left without ordering. It only dawned on me the next day that I had no idea what the meaning of the characters was and it could have been anything. I never wore it again I threw it away.
That was just ignorant of them to get so worked up about it. It might have helped if they'd explained.
 
I think there was a bit of a language barrier Mythipoeika. Also we really do not know what was written- which worried me.
 
Whe; I was working nights on a male surgical ward
This is completely off topic, but I find my self fascinated by the fact that, in your typo, a " ; " was substituted for the "n."

I put the towel in the bin in his room and there were 8 empty cans of special brew in there
Very special brew indeed! :beer:
 
This did not happen to me. It happened to an acquaintance of mine who I was not especially close to. So it may be complete baloney.

At the time we were both living in a youth hostel. One night my acquaintance smoked some joints and drank some beer.

He claimed that a very evil looking dwarf spiralled up through the floor, stared into his face, laughed maliciously at him, then vanished into thin air.

On another occasion he claimed he heard an invisible coach and horses gallop through his room.

I personally did not experience any strange events at the hostel.

Although one night I took some magic mushrooms. When I went out into the corridor instead of appearing in its normal horizontal configuration, it appeared to be a steep vertical shaft. This made my trip to the bathroom unusually challenging.
 
This did not happen to me. It happened to an acquaintance of mine who I was not especially close to. So it may be complete baloney.

At the time we were both living in a youth hostel. One night my acquaintance smoked some joints and drank some beer.

He claimed that a very evil looking dwarf spiralled up through the floor, stared into his face, laughed maliciously at him, then vanished into thin air.

On another occasion he claimed he heard an invisible coach and horses gallop through his room.

I personally did not experience any strange events at the hostel.

Although one night I took some magic mushrooms. When I went out into the corridor instead of appearing in its normal horizontal configuration, it appeared to be a steep vertical shaft. This made my trip to the bathroom unusually challenging.

Reading that took me right back to my student days.
The one and only time I ate magic mushrooms, I had a vaguely similar experience. I was walking to the students' union bar and it felt as if the pavement were curling up in front of me. I had the impression that I was walking inside a huge hamster wheel!
Certainly an interesting experience, but I didn't think it was worth the nausea and stomach cramps that affected me for the following 24 hours.
 
We were out yesterday afternoon for a few ales, settled on a powerful craft brew called 'Dank Marvin' which had enough hops to floor Ozzy Osbourne. Long story short...there's a lemon cake in the kitchen and I have no idea how it got there.
 
When I got very drunk i used to walk home on nights out via a railway line. One night i got very very drunk and fell off the top of a railway bridge i used to access said railway line. When i regained consciousness on the track, i didn't really check for injuries and so didn't realise i was drenched top to toe in blood. Not only did i scare the shit out of a passing train driver and his passengers, but further along the line i came face to face with a driver sitting reading a newspaper in his cab and i scared him so much he started the engine up and reversed up the line to get away from me. Being a goth probably didn't help much either, but it was the 80's.....
 
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When I got very drunk i used to walk home on nights out via a railway line. One night i got very very drunk and fell off the top of a railway bridge i used to access said railway line. When i regained consciousness on the track, i didn't really check for injuries and so didn't realise i was drenched top to toe in blood. Not only did i scare the shit out of a passing train driver and his passengers, but further along the line i came face to face with a driver sitting reading a newspaper in his cab and i scared him so much he started the engine up and reversed up the line to get away from me. Being a goth probably didn't help much either, but it was the 80's.....
Whoa! I hope you got off to a hospital ASAP.
 
heh. nope. In those drink fueled days it didn't occur to me to go to a hospital unless it hurt. This was a big bridge. 3 arch job with loads of lines underneath. To this day i've no idea how i survived - i guess being drunk and floppy i fell like a sack of spuds and didn't stick out my arms or legs in anticipation of an impact. Like i said, i didn't realise i'd cut the top of my head open and the only injury i recall at the time was a badly twisted ankle. When i did eventually hobble home, i nearly sh*t myself when i caught my reflection in the bathroom mirror and saw my completely blood covered face and drenched clothes. The thing i most remember is seeing the train driver throw his newspaper in the air and try and run through the back wall of the cab and me wondering what the hell his problem was:D
 
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When I got very drunk i used to walk home on nights out via a railway line. One night i got very very drunk and fell off the top of a railway bridge i used to access said railway line. When i regained consciousness on the track, i didn't really check for injuries and so didn't realise i was drenched top to toe in blood.

What was your normal way of accessing the railway line on less kamikaze nights?
 
What was your normal way of accessing the railway line on less kamikaze nights?


well walking home on a live railway line is stupid (don't do it kids) but this was the late 80's and our railway lines were very much less busy back then. The line i used is now a very busy route to london but at the time was a very quiet commuter stub that closed up shop around about 10pm. In all my times going home this way i'd never seen a train but it was obviously being used later for some reason that weekend. I used to walk from the city centre after i missed the night bus after midnight to a small unmanned station and i just walked off the platform and home. Then they closed the station, so i found a bridge just past it and climbed down the embankment. One night i decided to walk across the top of the bridge wall to see if i could and........ i .couldn't
 
Back in the late nineties my brother and I travelled up to Edinburgh for a friend's stag do. A few of us booked into a really cheap hotel can't even remember it's name). It was so cheap it didn't have en suite. The bathroom was across the hall. My brother and I paired up in one room and some of our mates in other rooms. Obviously there was copious amounts of booze and at the end of the night went back to the hotel/guest house. During the night I had to go to the toilet which was a mission in it 's self. But I managed it and went back to sleep. I woke up in the morning with the sensation of my bum touching another bum.I slowly tuned round and expected to see my brother. Here lying, now wide awake was a bald man in his early sixties. I jumped out of bed and said"shit sorry mate, I must have got the wrong room after I went to the toilet" He looked at me and said"I don't think so I think it's me" at that I noticed my brother comatose on the floor. "You did get the wrong room mate, that's my brother on the floor" He jumped up all apologies"I'm really sorry pal, I had too many beers last night"I was so relieved I wasn't at fault I couldn't be annoyed."Its's all right no harm done"well I hoped!He sloped off just wearing his boxers and stopped at the door and said"I don't know what I'm going to say to the wife!" Best of all i'm 6'3 and the bed was tiny!Best of all my brother slept through it all, thankfully!
 
Back in the days i was walking railway lines, i used to drink in this pub. The big attraction was Newcastle Brown ale. Now i'm not really a fan but this was 20+ year old Newky brown. You had to ask at the bar all secretive, and they'd send someone down to the cellar and eventually they'd bring up a wet mud covered bottle with no label and a rusty top. This stuff was so old, a favourite game was banging your glass on the top of someone's newky bottle so the bottom of the bottle would break off and they'd loose the precious loopy juice, One night i overdid it and i had my lost weekend. I remember getting to this pub on a friday night and my friends remember me being quite normal and then i was gone. The next thing i remember was waking up with my arms around an alsation with both of us howling on sunday morning with a startled security guard watching me, I had apparenty climbed over the outside wall of a hotel and ended up in the guard dog paddock. What i'd done for the previous 30 odd hours i had no idea but for a good year after, total strangers would greet me like an old friend in various pubs and clubs, and i used to get people turning up at my door claiming i'd invited them to stay. I cut down a bit after that:oops:
 
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I remember getting to this pub on a friday night and my friends remember me being quite normal and then i was gone. The next thing i remember was waking up with my arms around an alsation with both of us howling on sunday morning with a startled security guard watching me, I had apparenty climbed over the outside wall of a hotel and ended up in the guard dog paddock. What i'd done for the previous 30 odd hours i had no idea but for a good year after, total strangers would greet me like an old friend in various pubs and clubs, and i used to get people turning up at my door claiming i'd invited them to stay. I cut down a bit after that:oops:

Legend!

maximus otter
 
Back in the days i was walking railway lines, i used to drink in this pub. The big attraction was Newcastle Brown ale. Now i'm not really a fan but this was 20+ year old Newky brown. You had to ask at the bar all secretive, and they'd send someone down to the cellar and eventually they'd bring up a wet mud covered bottle with no label and a rusty top. This stuff was so old, a favourite game was banging your glass on the top of someone's newky bottle so the bottom of the bottle would break off and they'd loose the precious loopy juice, One night i overdid it and i had my lost weekend. I remember getting to this pub on a friday night and my friends remember me being quite normal and then i was gone. The next thing i remember was waking up with my arms around an alsation with both of us howling on sunday morning with a startled security guard watching me, I had apparenty climbed over the outside wall of a hotel and ended up in the guard dog paddock. What i'd done for the previous 30 odd hours i had no idea but for a good year after, total strangers would greet me like an old friend in various pubs and clubs, and i used to get people turning up at my door claiming i'd invited them to stay. I cut down a bit after that:oops:
I had that once. A bunch of dodgy looking lads came up to me in town and one started talking to me as if he knew me. I said 'do I know you?' and he said 'you seemed to be friendly enough last night, mate'. A bit freaked, I walked away. My gut instincts told me that I wouldn't normally chat to a bunch of guys like that (looked like druggies). Soon after, I gave up drinking.
 
waking up with my arms around an Alsatian

After a boozy night out with Liverpool chums, I was grateful for the comfortable bed in their spare room. I awoke when the early summer sun hit the pillow and I detected some off-colour odours and two numb legs. Liz was snoring beside me, all four legs in the air. Liz was a hysterical spaniel - are there any others? - and she looked worryingly satisfied. My legs were pinned down by George, the Great Dane, a noble beastie, to look at.

When I had extricated my legs from under George, I went to investigate the plumbing. He hadn't bothered to do that but had curled out the most ginormous turd on the landing. And there I was, blaming the breath of the spaniel!

I do recall that the logistics of disposing of that monster turd were ridiculously complicated in an unfamiliar house. In the end, it had to wait in a bucket by the back door, for fear of triggering the alarm. I even shampooed the carpet with Head & Shoulders and freshened the air. Now I could at least enjoy another couple of hours sleep, without the stink; the dogs had settled in their own incestuous heap.

It was a few weeks before there was any occasion to discuss the events of that night. It transpired that my chums were convinced that for some reason I had done a shit in the bucket and left it for them to find! I should have thought the girth of the thing . . . :dpoo:
 
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