I Think My Mother Just Had A Visitor From The Spirit World

[queenofwands]

My mother is 90 years old and lives with me ,as I'm her full time carer. She has been completely bed bound, since suffering a fall , a year ago.
Just this morning , after she'd finished her breakfast , I heard her shouting the name of an old friend of hers. I went to see what was going on and she asked me where Norma had gone. I told her that Norma has not been here. She would not believe me and was insistent that Norma had been in her room , right in front of her and had been talking to her.
I really thought my mother was starting to lose her marbles and was clearly confused. I told her that Norma definitely had not been here, and suggested , she must have nodded off, and had a dream about Norma. My mother got really angry , at this point and insisted that Norma must be in the living room and demanded to know why I was preventing her from seeing her.
I suggested we call Norma , so I got the phone and dialled Norma's number. It had been disconnected. I explained this to my mother, but stubbornly , she would not accept this and demanded to call the number herself. She got the same dead number.
It dawned on me , at this point , that Norma must have died or gone into an old folks home . I checked the obituaries and sure enough , I discovered that Norma had passed away in January. I explained this to my mother and read the obituary for her . She said she understood now , and That Norma had paid her a visit from spirit , to say goodbye .

 

[Trevp666]

Yes indeed. Her experience, even if it didn't happen, would have been quite real to her.
As much as we might find one of our elderly relatives speaking of seeing someone who clearly wasn't there in person, a bit silly, it would be a tad unkind to suggest they are imagining it.

 

[queenofwands]

Yes indeed. Her experience, even if it didn't happen, would have been quite real to her.
As much as we might find one of our elderly relatives speaking of seeing someone who clearly wasn't there in person, a bit silly, it would be a tad unkind to suggest they are imagining it.

My feeling is it was a real experience. I think its too much of a coincidence that the friend did die , only a few weeks ago and my mother didn't know that

 

[Kondoru]

<Nods>

 

[catseye]

You may want to prepare yourself, @queenofwands ... my mum started seeing deceased relatives and friends not long before she passed away. It seems to be a sign.

 

[Cloudbusting]

You may want to prepare yourself, @queenofwands ... my mum started seeing deceased relatives and friends not long before she passed away. It seems to be a sign.

It's also possible she may have an infection. I've known relatives to start seeing things and acting quite strangely, but then find out they've got an infection (resolved with antibiotics). Perhaps keep a close eye on her behaviour today.

All that said, I also think it's completely possible that her friend was visiting her, which would be lovely. Has she said anything about what Norma said - did she want to give her a message or was it just general chit chat? Also, did Norma walk out of the room or simply disappear?

 

[queenofwands]

You may want to prepare yourself, @queenofwands ... my mum started seeing deceased relatives and friends not long before she passed away. It seems to be a sign.

yes I know. They do say that

 

[queenofwands]

It's also possible she may have an infection. I've known relatives to start seeing things and acting quite strangely, but then find out they've got an infection (resolved with antibiotics). Perhaps keep a close eye on her behaviour today.

All that said, I also think it's completely possible that her friend was visiting her, which would be lovely. Has she said anything about what Norma said - did she want to give her a message or was it just general chit chat? Also, did Norma walk out of the room or simply disappear?

I did ask her what Norma said but she didn't tell me . I'll ask her again later. She said Norma had left the room . I plan to get some antibiotics for her , just in case she does have an infection . I know infection can make old people very confused , but still , I think its odd and perhaps Catseye is right

 

[Erinaceus]

I was sitting with my grandfather when he said his younger brother was in the room. He had died in the first world War.

 

[Ronnie Jersey]

I believe it totally, it's happened to me many times. The dead are not quiet.
And when my Mum (she and my dad had moved to another state) told me that her deceased cat came to her in the mornings, I started to worry.
Wasn't long before she was gone as well.

 

[charliebrown]

Before my father died in the nursing home, he would tell people he saw his long past mother.

I think he was given medicine for anxiety, but I don’t think it helped.

Then on the flip side, when my wife’s father died she claimed she saw him briefly when he told my wife not to worry because he was fine.

I don’t know, do spirits have unfinished missions ?

 

[queenofwands]

Before my father died in the nursing home, he would tell people he saw his long past mother.

I think he was given medicine for anxiety, but I don’t think it helped.

Then on the flip side, when my wife’s father died she claimed she saw him briefly when he told my wife not to worry because he was fine.

I don’t know, do spirits have unfinished missions ?

I think death doesn't change the bonds we form with people we have loved on earth plane. Death is just like going out of one room and into another. Love and life are eternal.

 

[gattino]

This account is very much in line with countless reports of Deathbed Visions. Perhaps the alternative name of "End Of Life Phenomena" would be better as it doesn't necessarily mean she is going anywhere immediately, but that its part of a process.

My mother was referring to her own mum and/or my dad (and one occasion HIS mother), all dead, for up to five years prior to her death. If they were "hallucinations" it was notable that they were never of the living. Nor was she selectively choosing the comforting notion of the deceased as her dementia made her seemingly completely unaware that these loved ones were dead.

The most compelling thing about your story is the fact she accepted the evidence her friend was dead and re-interpreted her visit accordingly. That to me is evidence enough your mum's vision was not the delusions of infection, senility or medication.

People will believe what they most want to believe, but from the countless incidents and accounts ive read or listened to over the years of such things i have no doubt that your mum really did experience some form of visitation from her friend.

Your mum's interpretation - and yours - seem to be that this was Norma saying goodbye rather that forshadowing your mum's own departure...and that may well be the right understanding. My own speculation observing my mum in her last years was to wonder if the very act of slowly detaching from this world through ill health or simply great old age, may cause mediumistic experiences to occur. That to say the sick and elderly may see and hear things the rest of us can't and they themselves wouldn't have previously because their own transition, however slow, means their mind is slowly becoming a little less entangled with their physical brain.

 

[gattino]

Above edited for an extra paragraph.

 

[queenofwands]

This account is very much in line with countless reports of Deathbed Visions. Perhaps the alternative name of "End Of Life Phenomena" would be better as it doesn't necessarily mean she is going anywhere immediately, but that its part of a process.

My mother was referring to her own mum and/or my dad (and one occasion HIS mother), all dead, for up to five years prior to her death. If they were "hallucinations" it was notable that they were never of the living. Nor was she selectively choosing the comforting notion of the deceased as her dementia made her seemingly completely unaware that these loved ones were dead.

The most compelling thing about your story is the fact she accepted the evidence her friend was dead and re-interpreted her visit accordingly. That to me is evidence enough your mum's vision was not the delusions of infection, senility or medication.

People will believe what they most want to believe, but from the countless incidents and accounts ive read or listened to over the years of such things i have no doubt that your mum really did experience some form of visitation from her friend.

I believe so , too. She has seen her mother , too , but that was many years ago, when she was only in her 30's . Her mother died when she was only 18. There was also an incident that happened 4 years ago, where I'm convinced her sister made contact from spirit , at a moment when my mother was in danger . That;s a story for another time , though

 

[Lizard King]

My mother is 90 years old and lives with me ,as I'm her full time carer. She has been completely bed bound, since suffering a fall , a year ago.
Just this morning , after she'd finished her breakfast , I heard her shouting the name of an old friend of hers. I went to see what was going on and she asked me where Norma had gone. I told her that Norma has not been here. She would not believe me and was insistent that Norma had been in her room , right in front of her and had been talking to her.
I really thought my mother was starting to lose her marbles and was clearly confused. I told her that Norma definitely had not been here, and suggested , she must have nodded off, and had a dream about Norma. My mother got really angry , at this point and insisted that Norma must be in the living room and demanded to know why I was preventing her from seeing her.
I suggested we call Norma , so I got the phone and dialled Norma's number. It had been disconnected. I explained this to my mother, but stubbornly , she would not accept this and demanded to call the number herself. She got the same dead number.
It dawned on me , at this point , that Norma must have died or gone into an old folks home . I checked the obituaries and sure enough , I discovered that Norma had passed away in January. I explained this to my mother and read the obituary for her . She said she understood now , and That Norma had paid her a visit from spirit , to say goodbye .

My brother in law James died of cancer four years ago. At the time his mother was in her early nineties and had dementia. The family decided not to tell her her son had passed as her dementia was so advanced. She believed that he was working away. When he was ill she would ask where he was, to be told he was still working away. On the day he died my sister went to visit her mother in law and debated with herself whether to tell her that he had passed or not to say anything. When she got to her mother in laws house, she found her in great mood. She excitedly told my sister how glad she was that James was home and how well he looked that morning when he came to visit her. My sister took great comfort this,and really believes James went to see his mum before he went.

 

[queenofwands]

My brother in law James died of cancer four years ago. At the time his mother was in her early nineties and had dementia. The family decided not to tell her her son had passed as her dementia was so advanced. She believed that he was working away. When he was ill she would ask where he was, to be told he was still working away. On the day he died my sister went to visit her mother in law and debated with herself whether to tell her that he had passed or not to say anything. When she got to her mother in laws house, she found her in great mood. She excitedly told my sister how glad she was that James was home and how well he looked that morning when he came to visit her. My sister took great comfort this,and really believes James went to see his mum before he went.

That's a lovely story

 

[queenofwands]

This account is very much in line with countless reports of Deathbed Visions. Perhaps the alternative name of "End Of Life Phenomena" would be better as it doesn't necessarily mean she is going anywhere immediately, but that its part of a process.

My mother was referring to her own mum and/or my dad (and one occasion HIS mother), all dead, for up to five years prior to her death. If they were "hallucinations" it was notable that they were never of the living. Nor was she selectively choosing the comforting notion of the deceased as her dementia made her seemingly completely unaware that these loved ones were dead.

The most compelling thing about your story is the fact she accepted the evidence her friend was dead and re-interpreted her visit accordingly. That to me is evidence enough your mum's vision was not the delusions of infection, senility or medication.

People will believe what they most want to believe, but from the countless incidents and accounts ive read or listened to over the years of such things i have no doubt that your mum really did experience some form of visitation from her friend.

Your mum's interpretation - and yours - seem to be that this was Norma saying goodbye rather that forshadowing your mum's own departure...and that may well be the right understanding. My own speculation observing my mum in her last years was to wonder if the very act of slowly detaching from this world through ill health or simply great old age, may cause mediumistic experiences to occur. That to say the sick and elderly may see and hear things the rest of us can't and they themselves wouldn't have previously because their own transition, however slow, means their mind is slowly becoming a little less entangled with their physical brain.

yes, they seem to have a foot in both worlds

 

[skinny]

All responses are worthy of respect. Science says it’s brain chemistry pulling in latent memory. Common sense and vast experience both attest that it really is happening to our relatives when we see this purported contact with the dead. Both are correct within their spheres of belief. Death and its imminence is one of the least understood areas of human experience in terms of scientific research.

 

[Erinaceus]

It's usually a vision of a single person that is reported. Three or four days before my grandmother passed she said one of her sisters had visited her in the night together with her (the sister's) husband. She had no signs of dementia and died from old age and failing organs at almost 102 years old.
If these claims are accepted as evidence of some sort of afterlife it implies that souls/spirits/whatever continue their earthly relationships. On the other hand it could suggest that the sightings are internally generated by the brain.

 

[skinny]

I don’t think there is an afterlife. I think the one we are in now recycles. It gets into a rhythm.

 

[catseye]

It's usually a vision of a single person that is reported. Three or four days before my grandmother passed she said one of her sisters had visited her in the night together with her (the sister's) husband. She had no signs of dementia and died from old age and failing organs at almost 102 years old.
If these claims are accepted as evidence of some sort of afterlife it implies that souls/spirits/whatever continue their earthly relationships. On the other hand it could suggest that the sightings are internally generated by the brain.

My mother also reported her sister visiting, with her husband (both deceased). She knew they were both dead - although suffering from dementia she had lucid phases, but told my sister in law (who was nursing her) that they had been. When my sister in law asked about my dad (my mum's husband, also deceased), she reported that he was there, in the room, sitting in a chair reading quietly - which was so typical of my dad that I had to believe he'd been there!

Incidentally, my sister in law never met my dad, marrying my brother long after my father's death, so couldn't have been influencing her report!

 

[Paul_Exeter]

Thanks for posting @queenofwands, I have previously posted on here an experience my late step-father had that is very much of the same ilk. In brief, my elderly step-father went into a care home after a stroke, but was still mentally 'with it', it was more to do with his loss of mobility. His first wife had sadly died in the '70s during a routine operation. So when several decades later my now adult step-sister 'C' was due to undergo the same operation it was decided not to tell him as it was felt best not to worry him. The operation went ahead on the scheduled day and was successful but 'C' did require general anaesthesia.

By chance, another step-sister 'D' went to visit him the following day and he related to her an experience that he had never reported before (including before his stroke) or again since. This was that during the time the operation was taking place he had looked up from reading and seen 'C' sitting in the chair opposite him and smiling. He was taken aback as he hadn't heard her come in, so apologised and turned away for a moment to put away his paper and remove his reading glasses. He then looked back and 'C' had vanished. He was absolutely certain he had seen her and even tried to ring her on her mobile and apologise...! He persisted in asking 'D' if 'C' had been to visit but had to rush off (they lived somer distance away).

So in this instance neither party was deceased or about to become so, my step-father lived on for a several more years, but of course set-sister 'C' was very much in a 'different' place...

 

[eziofan]

Many years ago I was in hospital for a minor op. A few beds down there was an elderly gent who, the nurses told me, was on his last legs. One night I was woken by someone talking loudly. This poor old guy was wide awake and, judging by the conversation he was having, playing cards with an invisible friend. This went on for quite a while and there was even an argument when he accused his friend of cheating! As was forecast, the poor guy died a few days later. I was never quite sure wether his vision was due to the meds he was on or he really was having a 'visitation'.

 

[Paul_Exeter]

Many years ago I was in hospital for a minor op. A few beds down there was an elderly gent who, the nurses told me, was on his last legs. One night I was woken by someone talking loudly. This poor old guy was wide awake and, judging by the conversation he was having, playing cards with an invisible friend. This went on for quite a while and there was even an argument when he accused his friend of cheating! As was forecast, the poor guy died a few days later. I was never quite sure wether his vision was due to the meds he was on or he really was having a 'visitation'.

Hope he wasn't gambling for his soul with you know who

 

[queenofwands]

Thanks for posting @queenofwands, I have previously posted on here an experience my late step-father had that is very much of the same ilk. In brief, my elderly step-father went into a care home after a stroke, but was still mentally 'with it', it was more to do with his loss of mobility. His first wife had sadly died in the '70s during a routine operation. So when several decades later my now adult step-sister 'C' was due to undergo the same operation it was decided not to tell him as it was felt best not to worry him. The operation went ahead on the scheduled day and was successful but 'C' did require general anaesthesia.

By chance, another step-sister 'D' went to visit him the following day and he related to her an experience that he had never reported before (including before his stroke) or again since. This was that during the time the operation was taking place he had looked up from reading and seen 'C' sitting in the chair opposite him and smiling. He was taken aback as he hadn't heard her come in, so apologised and turned away for a moment to put away his paper and remove his reading glasses. He then looked back and 'C' had vanished. He was absolutely certain he had seen her and even tried to ring her on her mobile and apologise...! He persisted in asking 'D' if 'C' had been to visit but had to rush off (they lived somer distance away).

So in this instance neither party was deceased or about to become so, my step-father lived on for a several more years, but of course set-sister 'C' was very much in a 'different' place...

Very strange. They do say anasthesia takes you to the brink of death . Sounds like your step sister lef t her body during her op.

 

[Ronnie Jersey]

Very strange. They do say anasthesia takes you to the brink of death . Sounds like your step sister lef t her body during her op.

I'm petrified of anesthesia, had a few experiences of 'the dead' coming to speak to me when under.
And some nurses told me that they do hear similar stories from others. Very strange.

 

[Trevp666]

When I had a 'general' one time for some dental work, I was told afterwards that I had been extremely complementary to the dental assistant who I was saying was 'a very nice Chinese man'.
He wasn't Chinese. He was just some older bloke from Watford called (probably) Neville, or something.

 

[Robbrent]

I find these stories strangely comforting, thanks everyone keep them coming

 

[escargot]

Here's something I posted back in 2012 -

When I worked on the wards I looked after a very elderly lady who was seriously ill for a while and then 'rallied', which experienced nurses know often comes just before death. This lady told me that she knew she'd be OK as her mother visited her every night.

I'd been on lates all week and had seen every visitor. This lady had been more or less unconscious. Her visitors had all been middle-aged and younger, and anyway her mother would've been about 102.

The lady died peacefully soon after speaking about her mother. I reckon Mum popped back just one more time, and this time, took her home.