Limericks

Tigerhawk

Resistance is futile!
Joined
Jan 20, 2016
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Location
Skaro
I sit here with Irn Bru in hand
All ready to strike up the band
I've had one too many
Need to spend a penny
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
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I sit here with Irn Bru in hand
All ready to strike up the band
I've had one too many
Need to spend a penny
I'm unsteady -could you lend a hand?

/////////////////////////////////////////////////
It's the vodka that causes the trouble
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
Aug 25, 2001
Messages
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It's the vodka that causes the trouble
Only when drunk as a double
In gallon or pint
 

INT21

Justified & Ancient
Joined
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Messages
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It's the vodka that causes the trouble
Only when drunk as a double
In gallon or pint
or Litre, it 'aint
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
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Messages
3,050
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419
Points
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It's the vodka that causes the trouble
Only when drunk as a double
In gallon or pint
or Litre, it 'aint
Safe. Best treat as avoidable!

...........................................................
OK, I'll have half a shandy.
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
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Messages
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OK, I'll have half a shandy.
'cos GNC's knees are so bandy
You should hear them knock
This comes as a shock
 

INT21

Justified & Ancient
Joined
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Messages
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OK, I'll have half a shandy.
'cos GNC's knees are so bandy
You should hear them knock
This comes as a shock
but there are times when it sure comes in handy,

Come, tango, my dear, The dance of desire
 

escargot

Beloved of Ra
Joined
Aug 24, 2001
Messages
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309
OK, I'll have half a shandy.
'cos GNC's knees are so bandy
You should hear them knock
This comes as a shock
When they trap his


Oh sorry, got carried away there. As you were.
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
Aug 25, 2001
Messages
25,038
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8,550
Points
284
Come, tango, my dear, The dance of desire
We'll gyrate like our bums are on fire!
When we strut our stuff
 

INT21

Justified & Ancient
Joined
Jul 18, 2016
Messages
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1,963
Points
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Come, tango, my dear, The dance of desire
We'll gyrate like our bums are on fire!
When we strut our stuff
so smooth, nothing rough
 
Last edited:

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
3,050
Likes
419
Points
99
Come, tango, my dear, The dance of desire
We'll gyrate like our bums are on fire!
When we strut our stuff
so smooth, nothing rough
We'll put on a show to inspire!

.........................................................................

I hope you're light on your feet
 

INT21

Justified & Ancient
Joined
Jul 18, 2016
Messages
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I hope you're light on your feet
and you're willing to move with the beat
Your grand naughty bits
are just giving me fits
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
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Messages
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I hope you're light on your feet
and you're willing to move with the beat
Your grand naughty bits
are just giving me fits
Just please, come in off the street.

***

With this implant I'm hugely enhanced
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
3,050
Likes
419
Points
99
I hope you're light on your feet
and you're willing to move with the beat
Your grand naughty bits
are just giving me fits
Just please, come in off the street.

***

With this implant I'm hugely enhanced
Did you notice, the last time we danced?
 

INT21

Justified & Ancient
Joined
Jul 18, 2016
Messages
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1,963
Points
154
With this implant I'm hugely enhanced
Did you notice, the last time we danced?
So that lump in your pants
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
3,050
Likes
419
Points
99
With this implant I'm hugely enhanced
Did you notice, the last time we danced?
So that lump in your pants
that impresses your aunts
is not just a boil, to be lanced?

....................................................................................
I'd like to learn a new skill
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
3,050
Likes
419
Points
99
I'd like to learn a new skill
play piano, or ski down a hill
but my fingers, they're stumpy
the notes come out lumpy
Would my super -long toes fit the bill?

..................................................................................
Could I master the saxaphone?
 
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