Limericks

Tigerhawk

Resistance is futile!
Joined
Jan 20, 2016
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Location
Skaro
I sit here with Irn Bru in hand
All ready to strike up the band
I've had one too many
Need to spend a penny
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
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I sit here with Irn Bru in hand
All ready to strike up the band
I've had one too many
Need to spend a penny
I'm unsteady -could you lend a hand?

/////////////////////////////////////////////////
It's the vodka that causes the trouble
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
Aug 25, 2001
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It's the vodka that causes the trouble
Only when drunk as a double
In gallon or pint
 

INT21

Justified & Ancient
Joined
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It's the vodka that causes the trouble
Only when drunk as a double
In gallon or pint
or Litre, it 'aint
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
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Messages
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It's the vodka that causes the trouble
Only when drunk as a double
In gallon or pint
or Litre, it 'aint
Safe. Best treat as avoidable!

...........................................................
OK, I'll have half a shandy.
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
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Messages
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OK, I'll have half a shandy.
'cos GNC's knees are so bandy
You should hear them knock
This comes as a shock
 

INT21

Justified & Ancient
Joined
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OK, I'll have half a shandy.
'cos GNC's knees are so bandy
You should hear them knock
This comes as a shock
but there are times when it sure comes in handy,

Come, tango, my dear, The dance of desire
 

escargot

Beloved of Ra
Joined
Aug 24, 2001
Messages
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OK, I'll have half a shandy.
'cos GNC's knees are so bandy
You should hear them knock
This comes as a shock
When they trap his


Oh sorry, got carried away there. As you were.
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
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Messages
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Come, tango, my dear, The dance of desire
We'll gyrate like our bums are on fire!
When we strut our stuff
 

INT21

Justified & Ancient
Joined
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Come, tango, my dear, The dance of desire
We'll gyrate like our bums are on fire!
When we strut our stuff
so smooth, nothing rough
 
Last edited:

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
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Messages
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Come, tango, my dear, The dance of desire
We'll gyrate like our bums are on fire!
When we strut our stuff
so smooth, nothing rough
We'll put on a show to inspire!

.........................................................................

I hope you're light on your feet
 

INT21

Justified & Ancient
Joined
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I hope you're light on your feet
and you're willing to move with the beat
Your grand naughty bits
are just giving me fits
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
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Messages
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I hope you're light on your feet
and you're willing to move with the beat
Your grand naughty bits
are just giving me fits
Just please, come in off the street.

***

With this implant I'm hugely enhanced
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
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Points
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I hope you're light on your feet
and you're willing to move with the beat
Your grand naughty bits
are just giving me fits
Just please, come in off the street.

***

With this implant I'm hugely enhanced
Did you notice, the last time we danced?
 

INT21

Justified & Ancient
Joined
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With this implant I'm hugely enhanced
Did you notice, the last time we danced?
So that lump in your pants
 

INT21

Justified & Ancient
Joined
Jul 18, 2016
Messages
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With this implant I'm hugely enhanced
Did you notice, the last time we danced?
So that lump in your pants
that impresses your aunts
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
3,148
Likes
431
Points
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With this implant I'm hugely enhanced
Did you notice, the last time we danced?
So that lump in your pants
that impresses your aunts
is not just a boil, to be lanced?

....................................................................................
I'd like to learn a new skill
 

INT21

Justified & Ancient
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I'd like to learn a new skill
play piano, or ski down a hill
but my fingers, they're stumpy
the notes come out lumpy
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
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I'd like to learn a new skill
play piano, or ski down a hill
but my fingers, they're stumpy
the notes come out lumpy
Would my super -long toes fit the bill?

..................................................................................
Could I master the saxaphone?
 

INT21

Justified & Ancient
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Could I master the saxaphone?
Would my playing melt a heart of stone?
you could give it a try
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
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Messages
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Could I master the saxaphone?
Would my playing melt a heart of stone?
you could give it a try.
I might make you all cry!
 
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