Limericks

IamSundog

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We're all looking forward to Easter
When we can ogle Peter Rabbit’s keister
That fluffy white tail
Sells eggs without fail
But then the buyer finds that he’s fleeced her


Santa and the Easter Bunny
 

Recycled1

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Santa and the Easter Bunny
Exist to make you spend money.
Their rampant avarice
Is just taking the piss *


*I was hoping I would not have to be the one to add such an unladylike rhyme! :)
 

IamSundog

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Santa and the Easter Bunny
Exist to make you spend money.
Their rampant avarice
Is just taking the piss
And the piss makes the egg dyes all runny



Recycled’s unladylike rhymes
 

IamSundog

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Recycled’s unladylike rhymes
Are surely the least of her crimes
I'm a saint, don't you know!
Pure as the driven snow
 

Recycled1

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Recycled’s unladylike rhymes
Are surely the least of her crimes
I'm a saint, don't you know!
Pure as the driven snow?
Well maybe, though there were some good times!

...............................................................................................

Now it's all early nights and hot cocoa
 

GNC

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Now it's all early nights and hot cocoa
And jet setting to gamble in Tokyo
Plus her Vegas trips
 

IamSundog

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Now it's all early nights and hot cocoa
And jet setting to gamble in Tokyo
Plus her Vegas trips
With her botoxed lips
 

Recycled1

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Now it's all early nights and hot cocoa
And jet setting to gamble in Tokyo
Plus her Vegas trips
With her botoxed lips........
You've both gone totally loco!

////////////////////////////////////////////////

What's on the agenda today?
 

Recycled1

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What's on the agenda today?
The Bishop will enter the fray
And declare to the swine
"You're just pawns, and you're mine!"
 

Dinobot

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Location
Under the floorboards...
What's on the agenda today?
The Bishop will enter the fray
And declare to the swine
"You're just pawns, and you're mine!"
And danced about nimble and gay!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The actress said to the bishop
 

Keith peace

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The actress said to the bishop
"I don't mean to just have a pop"
@GNC the actress said to the bishop, do you mind if I have a pop,I can hear the curtain call,and my cream's about to rise to the top,soon I shall be centre stage,mind and body and soul shall duly engage,the audience are fair lapping it up,as brinkmanship whirs like a top,here's the rapture let's take a bow,curtain fall so steady now,critics minds are agog,I fear I've got stage fright must have been all this grog..
 

Recycled1

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OK.
Welcome, Keith the poet.
Double welcome if you are good at writing limericks, but you need to learn the rules (and obey them!)
(If you don't , you find the MIB at your door!)

In this thread, follow the last poster with one line only.
The exception is, if your line completes the limerick, you start us off with the first line of a new limerick as well.
It's not etiquette to back track to previous limericks, however brilliant your contribution might have been. (MIB again.)

If you contribute to the BLitz Limericks thread, you get a whole six lines to fool about with i.e. four to complete the limerick that's been started by the previous poster, and two to start a new one. But we still don't usually do any back tracking.

There used to be a separate 'Poetry'thread in Chat where you could post any poetic contributions you like.

Having written that lot, regular service is resumed.............


The actress said to the bishop
"I don't mean to just have a pop.
So hitch up those skirts!"
 

Keith peace

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OK.
Welcome, Keith the poet.
Double welcome if you are good at writing limericks, but you need to learn the rules (and obey them!)
(If you don't , you find the MIB at your door!)

In this thread, follow the last poster with one line only.
The exception is, if your line completes the limerick, you start us off with the first line of a new limerick as well.
It's not etiquette to back track to previous limericks, however brilliant your contribution might have been. (MIB again.)

If you contribute to the BLitz Limericks thread, you get a whole six lines to fool about with i.e. four to complete the limerick that's been started by the previous poster, and two to start a new one. But we still don't usually do any back tracking.

There used to be a separate 'Poetry'thread in Chat where you could post any poetic contributions you like.

Having written that lot, regular service is resumed.............


The actress said to the bishop
"I don't mean to just have a pop.
So hitch up those skirts!"
@Recycled1 I much prefer the w.i.b.'s...
That said I'm new here and i understand so here goes:-
And let me afreshen your mop..
 

IamSundog

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The actress said to the bishop
"I don't mean to just have a pop.
So hitch up those skirts!
For my scepter fair hurts
And once started I really can’t stop”


Let me also point out that it’s good form to repeat the previous lines in your post so that the entire limerick as it stands can be read in one go.
Ideally, the poem should make grammatical and logical sense too, although this is sometimes difficult to achieve.
And with that, welcome Mr. Peace to our little game!


As I wandered deep in the woods
 
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