Limericks

Tigerhawk

Dazed and confused...
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Just WHO is controlling my brain?
Making me dance nude in the rain
 

IamSundog

Not insane
Joined
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Just WHO is controlling my brain?
Making me dance nude in the rain
Well, I'm wearing one wellie
That’s crammed full of jelly
 

ChasFink

Ephemeral Spectre
Joined
Jan 22, 2016
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Just WHO is controlling my brain?
Making me dance nude in the rain
Well, I'm wearing one wellie
That’s crammed full of jelly
And the other, a nice quiche lorraine.

-----

I've come back to my senses, I think
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
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I've come back to my senses, I think
And have noticed that terrible stink
I must admit my bowels
 

ChasFink

Ephemeral Spectre
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I've come back to my senses, I think
And have noticed that terrible stink
I must admit my bowels
Have ruined many towels
 

IamSundog

Not insane
Joined
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I've come back to my senses, I think
And have noticed that terrible stink
I must admit my bowels
Have ruined many towels
And left a foul stain in the sink


But let us seek verse more refined
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
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But let us seek verse more refined
And make our buttocks far better defined
 

IamSundog

Not insane
Joined
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But let us seek verse more refined
And make our buttocks far better defined
By doing our squats
O’er a stack of cumquats
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
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But let us seek verse more refined
And make our buttocks far better defined
By doing our squats
O’er a stack of cumquats -
As long as the neighbours don't mind!

..........................................................................

Is it time now to work on your core?
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
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Is it time now to work on your core?
Don't overdo it or you will get sore
 

Tigerhawk

Dazed and confused...
Joined
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Is it time now to work on your core?
Don't overdo it or you will get sore
Your poor back will spasm
Like a phantasm
 

IamSundog

Not insane
Joined
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Is it time now to work on your core?
Don't overdo it or you will get sore
Your poor back will spasm
Like a phantasm
And you’ll be on all fours on the floor


I have damaging information
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
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I have damaging information
About Trumps Administration
They've been infiltrated
 

Tigerhawk

Dazed and confused...
Joined
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I have damaging information
About Trumps Administration
They've been infiltrated
By gnarly Bill And Ted!
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
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I have damaging information
About Trumps Administration
They've been infiltrated
By gnarly Bill And Ted!
"Be excellent to each other - and STATION!"

***

A poster about a dangerous pet
 

Tigerhawk

Dazed and confused...
Joined
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A poster about a dangerous pet
Is the most fantastic thing yet!
 

Comfortably Numb

Antediluvian
Joined
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When you get to reach my old-age, you can feel the morning chills... you need a jobby first thing and then your daily pills. The problem is not needing one, that's not what makes you weep. 'Tis that moment when you realise, you've done it in your sleep.
 
Last edited:

IamSundog

Not insane
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A poster about a dangerous pet
Is the most fantastic thing yet!
To repel trick-or-treaters
 

ChasFink

Ephemeral Spectre
Joined
Jan 22, 2016
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344
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A poster about a dangerous pet
Is the most fantastic thing yet!
To repel trick-or-treaters
Advertise your man eaters
 

INT21

Antediluvian
Joined
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When you get to reach my old-age, you can feel the morning chills... you need a jobby first thing and then your daily pills. The problem is not needing one, that's not what makes you weep. 'Tis that moment when you realise, you've done it in your sleep.
Oh dear, you groan. 'I thought that I was dreaming'
while all the time in my jim jams the dreadful turd was steaming.
And now I'll have to change the sheets, my, what a dismal life.
I don't know how I'll do if I have to wake the wife..
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
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A poster about a dangerous pet
Is the most fantastic thing yet!
To repel trick-or-treaters
Advertise your man eaters
And you'll be avoided, I bet!

I get some cheap sweets in, "in case"
 

ChasFink

Ephemeral Spectre
Joined
Jan 22, 2016
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I get some cheap sweets in, "in case"
Things don't go so well with the Mace
Those brats can dodge quick
But they're bound to get sick
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
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Messages
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I get some cheap sweets in, "in case"
Things don't go so well with the Mace
Those brats can dodge quick
But they're bound to get sick
And vomit all over the place.

***

When I used the world's biggest Ouija board
 
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