Limericks

Tigerhawk

Dazed and confused...
Joined
Jan 20, 2016
Messages
2,300
Likes
2,719
Points
154
Location
Skaro
I’m having fun in quarantine
And dressed up like an aubergine
do you think I'm quite mad ?
When acting quite the lad
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
Aug 25, 2001
Messages
29,189
Likes
14,909
Points
309
I’m having fun in quarantine
And dressed up like an aubergine
do you think I'm quite mad ?
When acting quite the lad
Just take your clothes off behind the screen.

***

It's an examination you need
To get your health right up to speed
 

IamSundog

Not insane
Joined
Oct 11, 2002
Messages
3,504
Likes
1,143
Points
184
It's an examination you need
To get your health right up to speed
How's your colon today ?
Just check the bidet
And don’t spill the cup where you peed


We’ll need blood, urine, semen, and stool
 

INT21

Antediluvian
Joined
Jul 18, 2016
Messages
7,627
Likes
6,270
Points
279
We’ll need blood, urine, semen, and stool
Into this diagnostic tool
then we press the big switch
 

Tigerhawk

Dazed and confused...
Joined
Jan 20, 2016
Messages
2,300
Likes
2,719
Points
154
Location
Skaro
We’ll need blood, urine, semen, and stool
Into this diagnostic tool
then we press the big switch
And then we put the blame on Titch!
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
Aug 25, 2001
Messages
29,189
Likes
14,909
Points
309
We’ll need blood, urine, semen, and stool
Into this diagnostic tool
then we press the big switch
And then we put the blame on Titch!
Now please, get out of the pool.

***

I haven't cut my nails since I was ten
 

Tigerhawk

Dazed and confused...
Joined
Jan 20, 2016
Messages
2,300
Likes
2,719
Points
154
Location
Skaro
I haven't cut my nails since I was ten
Or my hair since I don’t know when
My general hygiene
Borders on the obscene!
 

INT21

Antediluvian
Joined
Jul 18, 2016
Messages
7,627
Likes
6,270
Points
279
I haven't cut my nails since I was ten
Or my hair since I don’t know when
My general hygiene
Borders on the obscene!
But I did shower once, not again.


That aroma, is it from your socks ?
 

INT21

Antediluvian
Joined
Jul 18, 2016
Messages
7,627
Likes
6,270
Points
279
That aroma, is it from your socks ?
You've been sitting too long in the stocks
Your odious effluvium
Caused mass delirium
People beating each other with rocks.

Oh dear, my friends think I'm a nerd
 

INT21

Antediluvian
Joined
Jul 18, 2016
Messages
7,627
Likes
6,270
Points
279
Oh dear, my friends think that I'm a nerd
(And my limericks don't scan, so I've heard)
but I will persist
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
Aug 25, 2001
Messages
29,189
Likes
14,909
Points
309
Oh dear, my friends think that I'm a nerd
(And my limericks don't scan, so I've heard)
but I will persist
Even through the red mist
So what if you look quite absurd?

***

Hark now! It's the music of the spheres
 

INT21

Antediluvian
Joined
Jul 18, 2016
Messages
7,627
Likes
6,270
Points
279
Hark now! It's the music of the spheres
So sublime it’s reduced me to tears
O musica universalis !
(even Deutschland über alles ?)
 

Recycled1

Justified & Ancient
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
3,372
Likes
690
Points
129
Hark now! It's the music of the spheres
So sublime it’s reduced me to tears
O musica universalis !
(even Deutschland über alles ?)
GNC's waxng lyrical, it appears!

............................................................................
Will this virus see me meet my Maker?
 

INT21

Antediluvian
Joined
Jul 18, 2016
Messages
7,627
Likes
6,270
Points
279
Will this virus see me meet my Maker?
I hope not! That’d be a heart breaker!
They'll be queuing to enter
Heaven’s quarantine center
your religion could be a deal breaker.

But for Hades the queues are much shorter
 
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