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Limericks

IamSundog

Not insane
Joined
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Some rhymes can be rather taxing
So let's try something far more relaxing
Like taxidermy!
(If it won't make you squirmy.)
It’d be one way to make that damned cat sing


If you would, kindly reach in my pocket
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
Aug 25, 2001
Messages
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If you would, kindly reach in my pocket
You might, in fact, pull out a locket.
Though you would feel sick
 

Tigerhawk

Dazed and confused...
Joined
Jan 20, 2016
Messages
2,991
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4,053
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159
Location
Skaro
If you would, kindly reach in my pocket
You might, in fact, pull out a locket.
Though you would feel sick
It's jolly Saint Nick!
 

ChasFink

Abominable Snowman
Joined
Jan 22, 2016
Messages
697
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1,595
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139
If you would, kindly reach in my pocket
You might, in fact, pull out a locket.
Though you would feel sick
It's jolly Saint Nick!
So if you love Christmas don't knock it!

I don't know why I'm so moody.
 

IamSundog

Not insane
Joined
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Messages
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I don't know why I'm so moody
When endowed with a big luscious booty
 

Dinobot

Justified & Ancient
Joined
May 19, 2015
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159
Location
Broadcasting from the moon...
I don't know why I'm so moody
When endowed with a big luscious booty
Playing classic tunes
 

escargot

Disciple of Marduk
Joined
Aug 24, 2001
Messages
32,763
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Points
309
Location
HM The Tower of London
I don't know why I'm so moody
When endowed with a big luscious booty
Playing classic tunes
While @IamSundog moons
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
Aug 25, 2001
Messages
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I don't know why I'm so moody
When endowed with a big luscious booty
Playing classic tunes
While @IamSundog moons
I feel it's his right Royal duty.

***


That last job interview went so badly
 

escargot

Disciple of Marduk
Joined
Aug 24, 2001
Messages
32,763
Reaction score
40,508
Points
309
Location
HM The Tower of London
That last job interview went so badly
It's a shame, 'cos I would have gladly
 

Dinobot

Justified & Ancient
Joined
May 19, 2015
Messages
3,580
Reaction score
4,325
Points
159
Location
Broadcasting from the moon...
That last job interview went so badly
It's a shame, 'cos I would have gladly
Put on my trousers
 

ChasFink

Abominable Snowman
Joined
Jan 22, 2016
Messages
697
Reaction score
1,595
Points
139
That last job interview went so badly
It's a shame, 'cos I would have gladly
Put on my trousers
and played with the schnauzers
 

IamSundog

Not insane
Joined
Oct 11, 2002
Messages
3,893
Reaction score
1,633
Points
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That last job interview went so badly
It's a shame, 'cos I would have gladly
Put on my trousers
and played with the schnauzers
Poking them till they’re snarling madly


Avoid eye contact when you see me
 

escargot

Disciple of Marduk
Joined
Aug 24, 2001
Messages
32,763
Reaction score
40,508
Points
309
Location
HM The Tower of London
Avoid eye contact when you see me
Yes, I know I smell just like sashimi
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
Aug 25, 2001
Messages
32,110
Reaction score
19,443
Points
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Avoid eye contact when you see me
Yes, I know I smell just like sashimi
A wondrous aroma
 

Dinobot

Justified & Ancient
Joined
May 19, 2015
Messages
3,580
Reaction score
4,325
Points
159
Location
Broadcasting from the moon...
Avoid eye contact when you see me
Yes, I know I smell just like sashimi
A wondrous aroma
Akin to Cromer
 

IamSundog

Not insane
Joined
Oct 11, 2002
Messages
3,893
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Avoid eye contact when you see me
Yes, I know I smell just like sashimi
A wondrous aroma
Akin to Cromer
It kindles romance hot and steamy

Oh to be seventeen once again!
 

Peripart

Antediluvian
Joined
Aug 1, 2005
Messages
6,300
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4,754
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259
Oh to be seventeen once again!
(Though learning to drive was a pain)
 

ChasFink

Abominable Snowman
Joined
Jan 22, 2016
Messages
697
Reaction score
1,595
Points
139
Oh to be seventeen once again!
Like a rooster seeking a hen.
 

escargot

Disciple of Marduk
Joined
Aug 24, 2001
Messages
32,763
Reaction score
40,508
Points
309
Location
HM The Tower of London
Oh to be seventeen once again!
Like a rooster seeking a hen.
A love sealed with pecks
 

Peripart

Antediluvian
Joined
Aug 1, 2005
Messages
6,300
Reaction score
4,754
Points
259
Oh to be seventeen once again!
Like a rooster seeking a hen.
A love sealed with pecks
(And a hand down your kecks)
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
Aug 25, 2001
Messages
32,110
Reaction score
19,443
Points
309
Oh to be seventeen once again!
Like a rooster seeking a hen.
A love sealed with pecks
(And a hand down your kecks)
Less a rooster - more of a wren.

***

I've discovered some dinosaur bones
 

ChasFink

Abominable Snowman
Joined
Jan 22, 2016
Messages
697
Reaction score
1,595
Points
139
I've discovered some dinosaur bones
Covered in strange pheromones
 

IamSundog

Not insane
Joined
Oct 11, 2002
Messages
3,893
Reaction score
1,633
Points
184
I've discovered some dinosaur bones
Covered in strange pheromones
That no man can resist
 

Dinobot

Justified & Ancient
Joined
May 19, 2015
Messages
3,580
Reaction score
4,325
Points
159
Location
Broadcasting from the moon...
I've discovered some dinosaur bones
Covered in strange pheromones
That no man can resist
If symptoms persist
 

escargot

Disciple of Marduk
Joined
Aug 24, 2001
Messages
32,763
Reaction score
40,508
Points
309
Location
HM The Tower of London
I've discovered some dinosaur bones
Covered in strange pheromones
That no man can resist
If symptoms persist
He's secreting the wrong sex hormones!

Let us talk about matters endocrine
 

feen5

Justified & Ancient
Joined
Feb 9, 2004
Messages
1,208
Reaction score
109
Points
94
Let us talk about matters endocrine
And the secretions I keep in this shrine
 

IamSundog

Not insane
Joined
Oct 11, 2002
Messages
3,893
Reaction score
1,633
Points
184
Let us talk about matters endocrine
And the secretions I keep in this shrine
Though they stink something fierce
 

Dinobot

Justified & Ancient
Joined
May 19, 2015
Messages
3,580
Reaction score
4,325
Points
159
Location
Broadcasting from the moon...
Let us talk about matters endocrine
And the secretions I keep in this shrine
Though they stink something fierce
Cupid's arrow did pierce
 

GNC

King-Sized Canary
Joined
Aug 25, 2001
Messages
32,110
Reaction score
19,443
Points
309
Let us talk about matters endocrine
And the secretions I keep in this shrine
Though they stink something fierce
Cupid's arrow did pierce
Neither your heart nor mine.

***

As the machines start their domination
 
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