Limericks

IamSundog

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So off rolled my head down the street
Like Vivian's in 'Thee Young Ones' repeat
A cutting remark
What's that sound? A bark?
A dog chasing me. My day’s complete.


The postman’s delivered a letter
 

Dinobot

Justified & Ancient
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The postman's just delivered a letter
From an irate Irish Setter
 

GNC

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The postman's just delivered a letter
From an irate Irish Setter
When it licked the stamp
 

ChasFink

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he postman's just delivered a letter
From an irate Irish Setter
When it licked the stamp
It got VERY damp
 

feen5

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The postman's just delivered a letter
From an irate Irish Setter
When it licked the stamp
It got VERY damp
Which did not make its mood any better

To improve the mood of a dog
 

ChasFink

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To improve the mood of a dog
You shouldn't serve it egg nog
 

IamSundog

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To improve the mood of a dog
You shouldn't serve it egg nog
Without lots of rum
 

escargot

Disciple of Marduk
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To improve the mood of a dog
You shouldn't serve it egg nog
Without lots of rum
First poured over Feen's bum
 

Dinobot

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To improve the mood of a dog
You shouldn't serve it egg nog
Without lots of rum
First poured over Feen's bum
Until you both fall off the log

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

In the mood for some hot lovin'?
 

GNC

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In the mood for some hot lovin'?
That's your version of the ol' Dutch oven?
 

escargot

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In the mood for some hot lovin'?
That's your version of the ol' Dutch oven?
Let me drink in the scent
 

Dinobot

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In the mood for some hot lovin'?
That's your version of the Dutch oven?
Let me drink in the scent
That's like tar and cement
 

IamSundog

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In the mood for some hot lovin'?
That's your version of the Dutch oven?
Let me drink in the scent
That's like tar and cement
Then see what objects I can shove in

There’s no accounting for attraction
 

Dinobot

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There's no accounting for attraction
Just a long, painful reaction
 

escargot

Disciple of Marduk
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There's no accounting for attraction
Just a long, painful reaction
When you're sighing and yearning
 

ChasFink

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There's no accounting for attraction
Just a long, painful reaction
When you're sighing and yearning
And feel a deep burning
 

GNC

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There's no accounting for attraction
Just a long, painful reaction
When you're sighing and yearning
And feel a deep burning
I think you're in need of distraction.

***

My space hopper just bounces too high
 

Nosmo King

I'm not a cat
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My space hopper just bounces too high
I keep hitting my head on the sky
 

IamSundog

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My space hopper just bounces too high
I keep hitting my head on the sky
Cracked the heavenly sphere
 

Dinobot

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My space hopper just bounces to high
I keep hitting my head on the sky
Cracked the heavenly sphere
With my mighty man gear
 

feen5

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My space hopper just bounces to high
I keep hitting my head on the sky
Cracked the heavenly sphere
With my mighty man gear
Its enough to make a grown man cry

While acting the pompous buffoon
 

Dinobot

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While acting the pompous buffoon
Wearing only a pink balloon
 

IamSundog

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While acting the pompous buffoon
Wearing only a pink balloon
I addressed the class
 

GNC

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While acting the pompous buffoon
Wearing only a pink balloon
I addressed the class
To perform midnight mass
 

IamSundog

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While acting the pompous buffoon
Wearing only a pink balloon
I addressed the class
To perform midnight mass
On a dais with my underthings strewn

Here - hold my beer and watch this
 

ChasFink

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Here - hold my beer and watch this
There's that woman that I want to kiss
 

Dinobot

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Broadcasting from the moon...
Here - hold my beer and watch this
There's that woman I want to kiss
Is it @escargot?
 

GNC

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Here - hold my beer and watch this
There's that woman I want to kiss
Is it @escargot?
The answer is no
 

Dinobot

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Broadcasting from the moon...
Here - hold my beer and watch this
There's that woman I want to kiss
Is it @escargot?
The answer is no
Then it should be devoid of bliss!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++


Engaging in debauchery?
 

ChasFink

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Engaging in debauchery?
Best not do it on the porch, you see
 
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