Misinterpreted Headlines

carole

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#33
Originally posted by taras
[

Helicopter "blows" men to riverbank (OK, this is just my dirty mind)

:)
Don't say things like that, taras, you'll get certain male board members all excited . . .;)

Carole
 

carole

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#34
beakboo said:
Hubcap has a strange way of seeing words which is occasionally amusing. My favourites were "Turkey Ordering Desk" (a sign in M&S), he wondered what a turkey would want with a desk.
I have a lovely mental image of a turkey in a pinstriped suit with pens sticking out of his top pocket . . .

Carole
 
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Anonymous

Guest
#35
i just saw a headline on cnn.com

"2003 BABY HAS TWO MOMS" meaning a lesbian couple gave birth to the first baby of 2003 in Washington DC.

but i read it as "2003 BABY HAS TWO WORMS"...i was like "oh my lord! poor thing!!!"
 
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Anonymous

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#36
I keep reading the strangeness in pennines thread as "strangeness in pennies". And I have hit the link at least twice now wandering what was so strange about the pennies (after having read the pennines thread). :rolleyes:
 

carole

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#39
Darrenxyz said:
I was glancing through the Radio Times for this evening and, for a second, thought that tonight's TOTP2 was "a special edition in which Celine Dion introduces her tits."

I'm not sure if that would be better or worse than her "hits."
She hasn't got any, not to speak of, anyway.

Carole
 
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Anonymous

Guest
#42
James, I do the same as you: Shoplifter and Shopfitter to me are one and the same.

And Chesapeake Bay. That will forever read as "Cheapskate Bay".
 
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Anonymous

Guest
#43
And speaking of dear Mr Al Fayed, I've read that, like all of us when speaking a foreign language, emotion and tongue-ties get the better of him. Berating an underling at his department store, the Egyptian grocer is reputed to have screamed:

"You f****** donkey. Stupid donk. Donkey donk F***"

How can a native speaker of English possibly top that for an insult?
Way to go, Mo.:D
 

Pinklefish

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#44
Clemenjules - what are they?
They're clementines, slightly out of it.

I prefer clemenjules, with the emphasis on the en.
 

Anome

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#46
carole said:
Take your pick, anome! :p

Carole
I just meant you need to be more specific than
Originally posted by carole
She hasn't got any, not to speak of, anyway.

to make it clear which you're talking about. Believe me, it makes a big difference.

Well, OK, not really. I just wanted to know.
 
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Anonymous

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#49
Saw a partially obscured newspaper billboard this morning that seemed to say "Izzard Death" And i thought :_omg: Eddie's dead!?!?!

Turns out it was Blizzard deaths, about the snowstorms :rolleyes:
 

intaglio

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#50
On the front of a recent New Scientist was

Four Winged Dinosaur Discovered
Nuclear Fusion Rocket

Now that's Fortean
 
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Anonymous

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#51
i know! you'd think a dinosaur that already has 4 wings wouldn't need a cold fusion rocket. ;)
 

rynner2

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#52
It didn't say cold fusion, just nuclear fusion.

Actually, the creature is not a dinosaur but a dragon - the reactor is for its fiery breath!

:D
 

Anome

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#53
So, in that case, how did it "discover" it? It just woke up one morning and realised "Hey, I've got a nuclear fusion rocket in my gullet! That would explain the heartburn"? I think not. (It has been a Well Known Fact for some years now that dragons run on fusion power. It had previously been thought they might use fission, but this would require them to eat a large quantity of Uranium and Plutonium. Their staple diet seems to rule this possibility out, as most Beautiful Princesses and Courageous Knights are somewhat deficient in these essential minerals.)

Still, it's better than a Jazz Fusion rocket. There have been some problems in getting enough kinetic energy out of it to be any use.
 

intaglio

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#55
Pinklefish said:
Walking past Tie Rack today, I read "The Art of Sick".

It was in fact, Silk.

pinkle
Pinkle, do NOT tell that to any modern (f)artists. They'll do it and next thing you know it'll be in the Tate :cross eye
 

carole

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#56
Especially as we've already had one (so-called) artist putting samples of his poo in tins . . .

Carole
 
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Anonymous

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#57
Misread...

Strolling past the shops yesterday on my way to get a newspaper, my bleary Sunday-morning gaze happen to fall on one of those newspaper boards with the headline written in black marker pen. "OAP FOR MUGGING VICTIM", it said, and I wondered why he/she would want the responsibility of looking after an old person just after they'd suffered such a traumatic experience, until my brain ran it past me again and I realised it actually read "OP FOR MUGGING VICTIM"...
 
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Anonymous

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#58
I mishear things more often then I misread them. One I still get teased about to this day was when my sister and a friend were talking about bad pick up lines. One of them said her favorite was "nice shoes, want to f***" I SOMEHOW heard it as "Where's my shoes, motherf***er". I sat there quietly trying to figure it out how that one worked, until I finally had to ask. They couldn't stop laughing at me for a good half an hour.:confused:
 
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Anonymous

Guest
#59
Misheard

Worse than that was the time a very straight colleague jokingly called me "stroppy-knickers".

I misheard it as "Drop your knickers", with hilarious consequences, etc.:rolleyes:
 

JudgeNutmeg

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#60
On the FT homepage i just read the breaking news headlines and saw what i first took as Benny Hill Revisited,then realised it said Betty Hill.Doh!
 
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