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Misinterpreted Headlines

It's not quite the same, but in a similar vein...

I found a photo file on my computer labelled Metalking. And however hard I wracked my brains I could not think what a Metal King may be nor why I should have a picture of one. It was most confusing. So I opened the file.

And found a picture of Me. Talking.
You have to be careful when setting up websites for therapy too give the nature of domain names, 'therapist.com' can easily be misread as 'the rapist.com'
 
Or Pen Island.
You are asking for trouble with a stationary business by that name lol like this resturant
EnmxsBJXMAUKGmz.jpg
 
I thought at first glance that the article would be about how children are surprised at the age of their parents.

My mind immediately went back to a time when I was 13 years old and out shopping with my mother. She presented her driver's licence to the salesclerk as ID for a cheque, and I discovered for the first time that my mother was 50 years old. 'My God', I thought. 'You're almost DEAD!' (She lived to be 95.) I was in shock for the rest of the day.

Mummy’s older than we thought: new find could rewrite history


(source: https://www.theguardian.com/science...e-thought-new-find-rewrites-the-history-books)
 
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Don't know if I have mentioned this before, bad memory, but when the TVTimes was out, they used to format their pages, which often led to half of a word being on the next line, I asked my sister what film was on that night and she said, Leg End of the Werewolf, I looked at her puzzled, so, I took the paper off of her, and, as you have guessed, it was Legend of the Werewolf, but to be fair her version was more accurate as most of the film, that is all you saw, till later on, bless her lil cotton socks, wonder where that saying comes from?
 
... bless her lil cotton socks, wonder where that saying comes from?

This seems to be consistently cited as the origin of the phrase ...
Quite often I have my cotton socks 'blessed'. Can anyone tell me the origin of this saying?

GEORGE Edward Lynch Cotton became Bishop of Calcutta in 1858 and while there established schools for Eurasian children. A man of great sensitivity, he ordered crates full of socks for the children, to be worn during lessons. It was the rule of the Bishop to bless all goods which arrived at the schools. A zealous member of staff one day distributed socks before the blessing, so thereafter every time a shipment arrived a note was placed on them to the effect: 'Cotton's socks for blessing'. Cotton's socks soon became corrupted to cotton socks. When the Bishop was drowned in the Ganges on October 6, 1866, a despatch was sent to the Archbishop to ask: 'Who will bless his cotton socks?'

(Mrs) Jane M Glossop, Pwllheli, Gwynedd.
https://www.theguardian.com/notesandqueries/query/0,,-1344,00.html

‘Bless their cotton socks’

While this might seem a straightforward one – little children who wore cotton socks would be blessed – it’s actually a bit more complicated than that, if the stories are to be believed.

It comes not from the cotton material, but from George Edward Lynch Cotton. In 1858 as Bishop of Calcutta, Mr Cotton created schools for Eurasian children. As part of his philanthropy, he ordered dozens of pairs of socks to be sent over for the children, blessing them on arrival.

One day, an overeager staff member handed out the socks before they were blessed so in future a note was added to the crates of socks saying 'Cotton's socks for blessing'. When he died in 1866, a message was sent to the Archbishop asking 'Who will bless his cotton socks?'
https://www.sockshop.co.uk/blog/posts/november-2015/the-origins-of-famous-sock-phrases
 
Never knew that!
If anyone's curious about my choice of user name here, the (rather mundane) story behind it is as follows.
When I first tried to register on the original Fortean forum seven years ago, the process failed for some reason. I tried to re-register, but the system prevented me using the same choice of name (which I used on 2 or 3 other social media sites). I was therefore racking my brains for an alternative name and was distracted by the light-hearted science show "Brainiac" on TV. Think it was Vic Reeves commenting on an experiment to test the friction/resistance imparted by a variety of footwear when sliding on ice. One run featured the subject wearing cotton socks, to which the commentary was "ah bless 'em!" and I thought that would suffice as a moniker.
 
This doesn't involve a headline but rather an online comment I read yesterday concerning the recent opening of a book retailer's outlet in my neighbourhood. The outlet is described as 'a place to buy books and throw pillows.' When I first read the comment I interpreted the word 'throw' as a verb rather than an adjective. I was puzzled why anyone would go to a bookshop to throw pillows. I eventually worked it out.
 
Seems a bit odd no matter how it's interpreted. I'm reasonably sure I've never seen that particular combination of goods for sale in the same shop. Though now that I think about it, I did once live near a place called Books and Birds, an unlikely mashup of a pet store and a used book shop. Not an unpleasant shopping experience, to be sure.
 
"Pokémon Company Apologizes After Van Gogh Collaboration Causes Scalping Mayhem"

Sadly it referred to scalping in the sense of hoarding tickets. No scalps or ears were lost.
 
This doesn't involve a headline but rather an online comment I read yesterday concerning the recent opening of a book retailer's outlet in my neighbourhood. The outlet is described as 'a place to buy books and throw pillows.' When I first read the comment I interpreted the word 'throw' as a verb rather than an adjective. I was puzzled why anyone would go to a bookshop to throw pillows. I eventually worked it out.
I'd guess because we call throw pillows 'cushions'. So if you're in the UK, it might take a moment.
 
Two things: one, I am immediately thrown back to 1989, when a friend asked me in a crowded shop "do you want to go to a horror convention?" and I for some unknown reason heard: "do you want to go to a bottom touchers' convention?".

And secondly, would anyone happen to know a resource for newspaper headlines? Specifically Metro from Dec 19th 2017. As explained better by my Facebook status on that day...

"Getting off the bus, I cast an eye at the stack of Metro newspapers, reading the headline as "Neanderthal Death Ray Exposed".
Probably should have waited til I got home before starting my medication."
 
Two things: one, I am immediately thrown back to 1989, when a friend asked me in a crowded shop "do you want to go to a horror convention?" and I for some unknown reason heard: "do you want to go to a bottom touchers' convention?".

And secondly, would anyone happen to know a resource for newspaper headlines? Specifically Metro from Dec 19th 2017. As explained better by my Facebook status on that day...

"Getting off the bus, I cast an eye at the stack of Metro newspapers, reading the headline as "Neanderthal Death Ray Exposed".
Probably should have waited til I got home before starting my medication."

Seeing as you just cast an eye at the headline might it have actually read "Neanderthal Death Rites Exposed"?
 
I don't know, as a combination of meds and innate stupidity meant I didn't actually record what the real headline was. However, as much as I'd love to think the funerary rituals of neanderthals would be deemed important enough to make the front page of our notorious free right wing rag, I can't help but doubt it.
 
I've just been over on Mumsnet reading about bad first dates. On the strength of that, cutting things off seems entirely reasonable.
 
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