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JamesWhitehead

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Mormen tend to troll around in male couples so I congratulate them on being the loveliest couple I have seen that day!*

*I have tried it in traditional Morman, "How bona to vada your dolly young eeks!" but they think I'm Polish these days.

Either way, they will look like they have just eaten soot. :D
 

Ulalume

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I got stopped by a pair of Mormons the other day in Norwich. Well, it was either Mormons or the Men in Black. Their opening gambit was "What's the best thing that's happened to you today?" I wasn't in the mood to banter with them so just brushed them off. You see them in these parts reasonably regularly - usually Americans. I believe they own a lot of land across East Anglia. The last time I saw them I was hurrying to Morrisons when they stopped to ask "What's the most important thing in life?" Again, I just wasn't in the mood for that sort of question.
That's interesting, Graylien. That second one could almost work for the Scientologists, too!
The missionaries who canvassed our old neighborhood would usually open with "did you know there is a prophet walking upon the earth today?", which is more mystical but no more likely to work.

Our upstairs neighbors were ex-LDS who would always go into hiding when they came around. One of them had actually skipped out on his mission year, so he was scared they were going to hunt him down and drag him back.
Out neighbors did give us the tip that you could put the missionaries off by claiming to be a Jewish national. The LDS had a covenant with Israel so wouldn't try to convert them. (I don't know if the covenant is still in effect at this time, though.)

ETA-
@JamesWhitehead - "Mormen" :rofl:
 

hunck

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Slightly off topic but round my way the Jehovas Witnesses come round on Saturday morning. I made the mistake one time when I was half asleep, of answering the door before checking the spyhole, to find them there. One of them asked me "how do you plan on spending eternity?" ffs.....
 

Graylien

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Mormen tend to troll around in male couples so I congratulate them on being the loveliest couple I have seen that day!*
Actually, Yeah. I've been stopped by a lot of Mormons over the years, but none of them has ever been female. Is there a reason for that? Are females exempt from doing the missionary thing?

Jehovah's Witnesses, on the other hand, seem to be largely female. The last time I encountered them, I was sitting on a bench by the river. Out of nowhere, a pair of attractive young ladies approached me. Not being Brad Pitt, I instantly knew I was in some kind of trouble.

"We don't want to disturb you" they breathlessly announced. "But perhaps you could find a moment to read this?" Then thrusting a leaflet into my hands, they hurried off into the distance. The leaflet looked like it had been designed in the 1950's and promised an answer to something like "If God Is Good, Why Does Evil Exist in the World?" So I read it. But sadly, it didn't really give a convincing reply to the question.

Then there was the time a couple of Witnesses came round to my front door. I was actually in the mood for conversation at the time, so I tried to engage them. One thing led to another, and they ended up shouting "Are you ACTUALLY comparing us to HITLER???!!!!" and then they walked off.

Come to think of it, that may have been my fault...
 

Mythopoeika

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Then there was the time a couple of Witnesses came round to my front door. I was actually in the mood for conversation at the time, so I tried to engage them. One thing led to another, and they ended up shouting "Are you ACTUALLY comparing us to HITLER???!!!!" and then they walked off.
Godwinned! :D
 

Anonymous-50446

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I had two members of the Church of the Latter Day Saints tap on the door once and Crazy Dave walked over to the door, which was ajar, and said "Can you pop back in a bit, we're in the middle of a tricky spell?" and shut the door.
 

Mythopoeika

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Who's Crazy Dave?
 

Ulalume

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A pal at the time. He sat next to me in my first physics lecture in 1985 and said "Want to see my radio in a matchbox?"
I knew a Crazy Dave, too. He was a friend of Caveman Tommy (who was exactly as you would imagine.) A missionary would need a great deal of spiritual fortitude to deal with either Crazy Dave or Caveman Tommy. :p

My favorite story about evading missionaries came from a friend whose family were communists. They'd shout out the window: "Go away! We are godless reds!" :D

Me, I'm sometimes inclined to chat about spiritual matters, leaving the missionaries more eager to avoid me than the other way 'round.
 

Krepostnoi

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I actually managed to get on to our local Jehovah's Witness no-call list. Not by any uncouth or downright rude behaviour, either, but simply by dint of asking whether or not they happened to have such a thing. And it transpires they do. There was an initial glitch, in that they called again soon after, and confessed to having not checked the list beforehand, at which point I may have become slightly abrasive, but there were no further interruptions to the quiet enjoyment of my home.

If that fails, I can confidently state I have not been troubled by unwanted callers brandishing the Watchtower since moving to Malaysia (although I have seen a brace of Mormen prowling). ETA I was accosted here while waiting for a taxi by some niche flavour of evangelical Christian. They thrust a flyer into my hand advertising a series of seminars on how to handle divorce, alcoholism, drug addiction, and being gay (what with that being a similar affliction :rolleyes:). Oddly enough, this did not win me over.
 
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JamesWhitehead

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Are you sure those weren't flyers for the Drug-addled Gay Christian Divorcees Drink-all-you-like Night at a local club?

Just wondering. :cool:
 

Xanatic*

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In what may be good news, several hundred mormons intend to publically leave the church today, due to it's recent policy over the children of gay couples. There's a Washington Post article about it but I still can't post links.
 

ramonmercado

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A gay woman has opened up about the horrific child abuse she suffered in a misguided attempt by religious bigots to ‘cure’ her sexuality.

Alex Cooper, now 21, has revealed she was subject to ‘conversion therapy’ as a teenager by her Mormon parents.

When she had come out as gay at 15, she was initially thrown out of her house. She was only allowed back in to live with them if she went to ‘cure her sickness’.

She was then forced to live with a couple who had no license or training to administer therapy but was convinced, having told Alex’s parents they could ‘turn’ her.

Among the torture and abuse, she was forced to stand facing a wall for up to 18 hours a day wearing a backpack full of rocks.

Speaking to a local CBS affiliate in Salt Lake City, Cooper said: ‘It’s like sending you to therapy to change your eye color. It’s not going to work. What it’s going to do is damage you.’

When she tried to escape, the man ‘punched me in the gut, knocking the wind out of me. I doubled over and choked for breath’.

After attempting suicide and several other escapes, Cooper got help from friends, lawyers and the courts. Her parents were then forced to agree to an unprecedented court order in Utah to not subject her to any more abuse via means of ‘conversion therapy’. ...

http://www.gaystarnews.com/article/...9da12240f5af9d3109c04df08c-Twitter#gs.hMaHv8w
 

ramonmercado

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Death Row Inmate Says Mormon Church Interfered in His Trial

A Utah man sentenced to death in a 1985 murder case is appealing his conviction by arguing the Mormon church interfered in his trial.

Douglas Lovell, 58, has been counseled by Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints bishops in prison, and he wanted them to testify as character witnesses after he was granted a new trial, his lawyers wrote in court documents.

But Mormon officials were concerned the bishops' testimony could make it seem like church representatives approved of a murderer, so they told some members to keep testimony brief while preventing others from testifying at all, attorneys argue. One mentor tearfully asked not to be called as a character witness after a higher-ranked member cautioned him against it, Lovell said.

Lovell's lawyers say that kept the jury from seeing how sorry he was for his crime and showing that his life has value, the Salt Lake Tribune reported (http://bit.ly/1NZQSYy).

"The church, out of concern for its policies, pressured witnesses not to testify or cooperate with Mr. Lovell," attorney Samuel Newton wrote. "And put witnesses in the position of having to disobey their church leaders to support Mr. Lovell."

http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/death-row-inmate-mormon-church-interfered-trial-39488541
 

Xanatic*

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16 wives? If they allow you to eat bacon, sign me up.
 

JamesWhitehead

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I found this in one of my Edenhall dossiers. I don't think I've posted it before.

A paragraph, perhaps circulated widely but taken here from The Carlisle Patriot, 01.11.1844:

"MORMONISM. - We understand that several disciples of JOE SMITH have come
over from America to propagate Mormonism, and seek contributions for what
they term the persecuted Saints of Nauvoo. As they will probably visit this
county, and other places within our circulation, we would entreat 'JOHN
BULL' to keep his eyes open, and pockets closed against their proceedings.
They are loudly proclaiming, in different districts in Lancashire, the
deaths of the SMITHS to be a continuation of the Apostolic persecutions, not
hesitating, at the same time, to place the blasphemous author of Mormonism
on a level with the divine author of Christianity. We would warn our
readers, therefore, against these men, the burden of whose song is - money,
money, - for what? - for the diffusion of the worst sort of infidelity. -
'Correspondent' "
Found on this Rootsweb Page.

The deaths of Joseph and Hyrum Smith had take place on 27.06.1844 when they were lynched by a mob opposed to their polygamous ways.

There had been a Mormon presence in the UK from 1837, according to this LDS history page. Preston was the centre of their early activities, so the warning to the Carlisle region was not so far-fetched. :cooll:
 

JamesWhitehead

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A long and interesting article.
Best read of the week!

I guess when your net worth is in nine figures (!) the ordinary rules don't apply.

Even so, the visionary scheme is not exactly inspiring when you look at the size of the dwellings with their as-yet-unperfected robots to move stuff around, like a stage-set. It is interesting that the Antals' own dream runs only to a tiny house yet - for all the edenic homestead trappings, it is surely built chiefly on the salary of the computer-engineer in the family. :rolleyes:
 

uair01

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A fascinating lecture! I learned a lot about 1850 folklore.


The purpose of this video will be to reconstruct the original story and restore it to its folk magic and treasure seeking context—a part of the story the average Mormon is woefully unaware.

I do not use the term "occult" to imply Joseph Smith was a Satanist, but rather that he practiced a heterodox form of Christianity that included what might be termed white or Christian magic.
 

rynner2

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Ex-Mormon bishop of Helston Steve Bloor reveals how church controlled his life – even his underwear
By G_WIlkinson | Posted: November 04, 2016

A former Mormon bishop has spoken out of how the church controlled every aspect of his life - even which underwear he chose. He has now been excommunicated and cut from the church forever, causing anguish to him and his family.

Steve Bloor, 52, was the bishop of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Helston for seven years until 2011. As a child, he had joined his parents and fellow church congregation to help build their place of worship in Clodgey Lane.

But Mr Bloor split spectacularly from the church after he questioned the faith's version of historical events and the way it controlled members. He spoke out publically two years ago but has now had his name removed from the church records.

He said: "As a fervently believing Mormon, I believed that the only way to true happiness in this life and the next was through the Mormon Church. So every decision in life, from who I made friends with, I married, music I would listen to, what I ate or drank and even what underwear I wore - which had to be bought from the Mormon Church – were all based around the teachings of the church.

"To remove your name from the membership records is the worst punishment they can give. It removes someone from their relations in the next life. This has had an enormous effect on me emotionally. My initial feelings were of betrayal by the people I trusted most in my life. I grew up believing church leaders were divinely called and trusted their words as if they were god's mouthpiece.

"It felt like a death in the family - my death. And my wife felt the same way. The fact that some of my extended family couldn't understand, but rather believed the church, hurt me even more. As a result I became withdrawn and stopped even thinking or talking about the church for almost a year because it was just too painful."

etc...

http://www.westbriton.co.uk/ex-morm...is-underwear/story-29868238-detail/story.html

Just realised I know that church - it's next to Helston Football Club, where my astronomical society used to meet!
 
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ramonmercado

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Life during and after being raised by Survivalist Mormons.

Educated. By Tara Westover. Random House; 385 pages; $28. Hutchinson; £14.99.

IN A lecture during her first semester at Brigham Young University, a Mormon college in Utah, Tara Westover encountered an unfamiliar term. “I don’t know this word,” she told her professor. “What does it mean?” He snapped at her angrily—but Ms Westover was not making a tasteless joke. She had never been taught about the Holocaust. Nor had she learned about the civil-rights movement, or physics or any geography beyond the mountains and valleys that surrounded her family home in rural Idaho. That semester was the first time she had ever set foot in a proper classroom. She was 17.

Ms Westover was the youngest of seven children raised by Mormon survivalists in a town of 234 people. Like her siblings, she was kept out of school, which her father regarded as “a ploy by the government to lead children away from God”. Her early education consisted largely of helping him sort metal scraps in the family junkyard, and watching her mother concoct herbal remedies for headaches, burns and cancer—required because the family also avoided doctors. Even when her siblings were maimed, their skin charred by blowtorches or brains injured in car crashes, they were treated with their mother’s homeopathic mixtures.

In “Educated”, her riveting memoir, Ms Westover brings readers deep into this world, a milieu usually hidden from outsiders. Scarred by the Ruby Ridge incident of 1992, in which several members of an Idaho family were fatally shot by federal agents after resisting arrest, her father became convinced the feds would ultimately come for his clan, too. He loathed the idea of “registering” with the government, so did not obtain birth certificates for Ms Westover and three other children. He spent his meagre income from scrap metal on a cache of huge guns and a giant gasoline tank, for fighting or fleeing when the authorities showed up. Ms Westover slept with a “head-for-the-hills” bag by her bed. ...

https://www.economist.com/news/book...tingmemoirofabrutalupbringingtheartofsurvival
 

Ermintruder

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I often get accosted by Mormon Missionaries in the city streets of Scotland, since I try to avoid driving whenever I can.

I find that the most-effective way of dealing with these well-meaning-but-scary individuals is to say that you are a committed member of the Church of Scotland/England/Ireland/Wales/Satan/Rome etc (either with, or without, your fingers crossed) and to ask (earnestly or otherwise) after the health of one of their street colleagues in another city (their requisite name cunningly-remembered from a previous encounter....they wear name-badges).

This (possibly-patentable) combination of tactical response to their diamond smiles completely screws-up their progamming, and they become like Furbies on flat AA batteries.

Their eyes flicker upwards, lost, and they look towards each-other for guidance (they hunt in same-sex pairs....the girls are always plain-happy pretty, and the boys have square-jawed handshakes that would squeeze the Lucifer out of Las Vegas.

I'm sometimes tempted to swap-over their wrist-watches, and change their bibles for Samsung Galaxy Tabs (whilst they're bamboozled), but I know it might backfire on me. So I refrain. Usually
!-(
 

Yithian

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The Mormons & Marco Polo

 

ramonmercado

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Tales of a pioneer trek re-enactment and a Mormon adolescence:

Once, in a special church meeting just for boys aged twelve to seventeen, my bishop said, without irony, “Young men, we need to discuss the grave sin of masturbation. Does anyone want to take a whack at that?” I fell out of my folding chair laughing. My friends suppressed giggles. The bishop lunged forward to stand over me and boomed, “Brother Fuller, why do you not take your salvation seriously?”


A Long Hot Walk to the Mormon Promised Land
Sexually frustrated teens in period costumes undertake a Mormon pioneer trek. The worst part isn't the heat. It's the singing.
By Miles Fuller

In 1847, the three largest groups of Mormon pioneers entered the Salt Lake Valley. One hundred years later, on July 24, my people took a commemorative “Pioneer Trek”—this time with automobiles decorated with oxen-shaped cutouts and canvas wagon covers—and drove together for eight days, from Nauvoo, Illinois, to Salt Lake City, Utah. It was symbolic, a centennial celebration. But in the decades since, we haven’t stopped trekking. To commemorate the sesquicentennial in 1997, a caravan of six hundred walkers and handcarts spent three months on the trail. As I was becoming a teenager then, a cottage industry emerged of people who made pioneer costumes and handcarts, and every Mormon kid was coming back in tears about how they’d never felt closer to God than when they were lost in the woods.

“Don’t leave those apple cores outside the tent, the coyotes will come sniffing,” I said to a girl, two years my junior, who was pretending to be my sister for the week. I met her for the first time the day we started walking, when I threw her backpack and pillow onto the wooden cart and began pulling hundreds of pounds toward the horizon—miles before the lace on her bonnet became stained with red dirt. Each morning, our group—an older couple in the role of our parents, two boys I was told to call brothers, one fake sister, and a plastic doll named Emma—tried to pack and leave early so that we could take the lead. Otherwise the rising dust from the other handcarts would choke us and sting our eyes all day. July in Utah can climb into the triple digits, even at high elevation; we’d march for a few miles in the morning while it was cool, then in the hottest part of the afternoon we’d stop the carts under some trees and say a prayer over cold sandwiches. But the worst part of moving again wasn’t the heat. It was the singing. “Pioneer children sang as they walked and walked and walked / Pioneer children sang as they walked and walked and walked and walked…” If there were more lyrics to the song, none of us knew them; it was a Mormon version of “The Song that Never Ends,” an earworm we’d learned as toddlers. ...

https://www.guernicamag.com/a-long-hot-walk-to-the-mormon-promised-land/
 

Waymarker

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Tales of a pioneer trek re-enactment and a Mormon adolescence:
Once, in a special church meeting just for boys aged twelve to seventeen, my bishop said, without irony, “Young men, we need to discuss the grave sin of masturbation.”
Ah sweet memories! Our male biology teacher once gave us young teenage boys a sex education lecture in a blacked-out science lab with diagrams of the internal plumbing of males/females projected onto a screen.
Most of us knew it all anyway and were bored, but a few kids found it er - stimulating - and there was a series of rhythmic low grunts and frantic movements coming out of the shadows all around..
 

Kingsize Wombat

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I only heard of this when Mitt Romney ran for President of the USA and a reporter asked him about his magic undies:

Unlocking The Mysteries Of The Mormon Underwear Known As The Temple Garment

They're not supposed to let anyone see it or even talk about it, but here's everything you always wanted to know about the Mormon underwear they call the temple garment.

The Mormon temple garment, or garment of the holy priesthood, is worn under the clothes of adult members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS) virtually at all times and they consider it a sacred symbol of their personal commitment to God.

Not only sacred but also extremely personal for believers, the temple garment had long been a mystery to non-members, those who even knew of its existence in the first place.

In fact, the temple garment (popularly referred to as “Mormon underwear”) is specifically meant to not be discussed and to be concealed from anyone who would not understand its religious significance. Even when not wearing it, Mormons are supposed to not let the garment hang in a place where it could be seen by anyone else.


http://allthatsinteresting.com/mormon-underwear-temple-garment
 
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