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Nude News: The Naked Truth

escargot said:
Someone showed me this.
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The problem is, l strongly suspect that the kind of individual who is keen to get their tackle out is the kind of individual whom l would least like to see nude: the fat; the middle-aged and old; the hairy-backed; the gobby, jut-jawed, finger-wagging “l know my rights!” type, and so on.

If you want to wobble your moobs, bronze your perineum (it’s a thing, apparently…) or expose your 42 Longs, please find somewhere secluded and private to do it.

England, and its gag reflex, will thank you.

maximus otter
 
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Frideswide said:
nothing wrong with a hairy man... just saying! :rasp:
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For your viewing pleasure...
5e48be07e48f3.image.jpg
 
maximus otter said:
The problem is, l strongly suspect that the kind of individual who is keen to get their tackle out is the kind of individual l would least like to see nude: the fat; the middle-aged and old; the hairy-backed; the gobby, jut-jawed, finger-wagging “l know my rights!” type, and so on.

If you want to wobble your moobs, bronze your perineum (it’s a thing, apparently…) or expose your 42 Longs, please find somewhere secluded and private to do it.

England, and its gag reflex, will thank you.

maximus otter
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I'm still suffering from sunburn acquired last Sunday.
It's painful enough across my neck and shoulders.
Burning ones todger doesn't bear thinking about!
 
blessmycottonsocks said:
I'm still suffering from sunburn acquired last Sunday.
It's painful enough across my neck and shoulders.
Burning ones todger doesn't bear thinking about!
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Get a person of your choice to rub sunblock onto said todger.
 
A married couple's anniversary dinner venue was treated to a boatload of naked people passing by ...
NAUGHTY-CAL Couple enjoying a romantic anniversary dinner were left shocked after being gatecrashed by a nudist cruise

A COUPLE enjoying a romantic anniversary dinner on water got the shock of their lives when they caught sight of a boat load of nudists.

John Wood and his wife had reportedly been enjoying a meal at the River Exe Café, on the Exe Estuary in Devon, when the naked passengers waved to them from their passing boat. ...

The couple were reportedly baffled to see the party goers stark naked but soon realised the ship was actually the Torbay Sun Club's annual Nude Cruise, where naturists set off from Exmouth Dock.

The aim is for nudists to meet and socialise with like-minded people while they travel on board in nothing but their birthday suits.

Luckily, many diners on board John's boat found it rather amusing with many whipping out their phone to take a snap. ...
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FULL STORY: https://www.thesun.co.uk/fabulous/1...anniversary-dinner-gatecrashed-nudist-cruise/
 
The news media has more than most to answer for in propagating a warped culture in which those comfortable with their bodies are freaks, to be laughed at, or ridiculed, or repulsed by, and a major factor of your worth is how attractive you are to heterosexual men.

For example, in the cruise story, it's 'naughty' nudists 'gatecrashing' the anniversary dinner, not the reality of a nudist cruise just happening to pass by the waterside restaurant the couple were eating at. Exaggeration and Benny Hill puns in the name of some cheap titillation.

As to the nude hikers, they very likely were rambling a remote location, or as close as you can get to one in the UK, but there's still always a chance of bumping into someone determined to be offended, so better safe than sorry.
 
WanderingFox said:
The news media has more than most to answer for in propagating a warped culture in which those comfortable with their bodies are freaks, to be laughed at, or ridiculed, or repulsed by, and a major factor of your worth is how attractive you are to heterosexual men.

For example, in the cruise story, it's 'naughty' nudists 'gatecrashing' the anniversary dinner, not the reality of a nudist cruise just happening to pass by the waterside restaurant the couple were eating at. Exaggeration and Benny Hill puns in the name of some cheap titillation.

As to the nude hikers, they very likely were rambling a remote location, or as close as you can get to one in the UK, but there's still always a chance of bumping into someone determined to be offended, so better safe than sorry.
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l’m “comfortable with my body”; that confidence doesn’t translate into exhibitionism.

l would be annoyed by assertive narcissism: “I want to take my clothes off, and my right to flaunt my lard/manky tattoos/cellulite/scars/clumps of hair trumps your right not to be affronted. Look at this!”

maximus otter
 
WanderingFox said:
The news media has more than most to answer for in propagating a warped culture in which those comfortable with their bodies are freaks, to be laughed at, or ridiculed, or repulsed by, and a major factor of your worth is how attractive you are to heterosexual men.

For example, in the cruise story, it's 'naughty' nudists 'gatecrashing' the anniversary dinner, not the reality of a nudist cruise just happening to pass by the waterside restaurant the couple were eating at. Exaggeration and Benny Hill puns in the name of some cheap titillation.

As to the nude hikers, they very likely were rambling a remote location, or as close as you can get to one in the UK, but there's still always a chance of bumping into someone determined to be offended, so better safe than sorry.
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The jokey headline was in the S*n, where you'd expect puerile salaciousness.

The notice was indeed out in the middle of nowhere, as far as I can tell.
What interested me was the faintly passive-aggressive assertion that the notice would be replaced if anyone removed it. The organisers must have trouble like that before.
 
escargot said:
The jokey headline was in the S*n, where you'd expect puerile salaciousness.

The notice was indeed out in the middle of nowhere, as far as I can tell.
What interested me was the faintly passive-aggressive assertion that the notice would be replaced if anyone removed it. The organisers must have trouble like that before.
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I think the only paper in the UK worse than the S*n is The Ma*l. I wouldn't even line a cat litter tray with them.

And I don't doubt they have. An example of the kind of mindsets naturists/nudists are up against: a woman complained about a man who was nude in his front room, and visible through his window, insisting the sight was traumatic for her young son; that the only way they could have seen him, given the tall hedges around his house, was to cut through his garden, didn't seem to matter to her.

maximus otter said:
l’m “comfortable with my body”; that confidence doesn’t translate into exhibitionism.

l would be annoyed by assertive narcissism: “I want to take my clothes off, and my right to flaunt my lard/manky tattoos/cellulite/scars/clumps of hair trumps your right not to be affronted. Look at this!”

maximus otter
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There's also the projection of attitudes and motivations that just aren't there. Nudism/naturism is not a direct synonym for exhibitionism. And what's so hard about just not looking?

Anyone wanting more information, the British Naturism website is a very good place to look.
 
WanderingFox said:
a woman complained about a man who was nude in his front room, and visible through his window, insisting the sight was traumatic for her young son; that the only way they could have seen him, given the tall hedges around his house, was to cut through his garden, didn't seem to matter to her.
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Where/when was that?
 
WanderingFox said:
A fair while ago, and if memory serves somewhere in the US. I'll see if I can dig up an article.
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I've found an article about one Erick Williamson from 2009 in Fairfax County, Virginia, who was seen by passing women and possibly a seven year-old boy standing naked in the window of his home. No hedges were mentioned but he was said to have called attention to himself by singing and making a noise when women approached.
 
escargot said:
I've found an article about one Erick Williamson from 2009 in Fairfax County, Virginia, who was seen by passing women and possibly a seven year-old boy standing naked in the window of his home. No hedges were mentioned but he was said to have called attention to himself by singing and making a noise when women approached.
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Close, but not it. Around the right time, though; I recall the occurence as I used it for inspiration for a conversation in The Midnight Girls, and I wrote that 2011-2013.
 
CarlosTheDJ said:
The Sport used to have a daily 'Nipple Count' box.
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Didn't the S*n once dismiss allegations of promoting sexual inequality by saying something along the lines of 'Our newspaper promotes PERFECT sexual equality; for every right nipple there is a left nipple'?

(I don't care if I've misquoted or even if that's the wrong rag, it's all shite.)
 
I've been watching the new cricket competition The Hundred which started last week and it seems that most matches have been interrupted by a streaker getting onto the pitch. At the match in Durham two male streakers were caught and arrested but won't be charged according to the newspaper report. As the competition has been aimed primarily to get families to attend and with some matches having around 20% children's tickets sold it just seems wrong to me, although many of the reports seem to treat it as an amusing incident.
 
Giant R said:
I've been watching the new cricket competition The Hundred which started last week and it seems that most matches have been interrupted by a streaker getting onto the pitch. At the match in Durham two male streakers were caught and arrested but won't be charged according to the newspaper report. As the competition has been aimed primarily to get families to attend and with some matches having around 20% children's tickets sold it just seems wrong to me, although many of the reports seem to treat it as an amusing incident.
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Streaking was all the go in the mid 1970s. Can remember a streaker (or 'freaker' as John Arlott called him) jumping the bails at Lord's.


(The next video ran straight on and was unintelligible to me! :chuckle: )
 
Sorry about the state of this news page, it's difficult to find a decent account:
News story

Anyway, as reported in the FT, a naked woman was found trapped in an 8 inch gap between two buildings (sideways), and nobody knows how she got there. Can't find any follow-ups where she explains herself, unfortunately. Ouch!
 
Tigerhawk said:
Beat you to it!
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Clearly a fake. The pink bow does not seem to blend with the overall colours in the frame. The noise on the rest of the picture is not seen on the bow.
The bag is lit differently to the rest of the frame and like the bow, there is too much definition and not enough noise. What really shows the image to be a fake though is a lack of nail varnish matching the ensemble, the hairy tits and a missing link to OnlyFans.
 
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