In a Game of Shirts and Skins, They'd Be the Skins
By MAREK FUCHS
Published: November 3, 2004
CLINTON, N.Y., Oct. 28 - At a rugby game at Middlebury College recently, cheerleaders had taken the field to urge on the home team with timeless perkiness when they were silenced by a drove of naked students running a parade line through the middle of the field. At Connecticut College, a tour of the campus was conducted in the typical formation, with the guide walking backward, pointing to everything from the library to the dean's office. The only wrinkle was that those taking the tour, both men and women, were without a stitch of clothes.
Both proved victories under the belt of a team that doesn't wear any.
At colleges across New England and upstate New York, a band of naked students from Hamilton College, who call themselves the school's varsity streaking team (and consider themselves undefeated and ranked No. 1 in the nation, though it is not clear - or even probable - that there is any competition), has been spotted tiptoeing through college libraries stark naked, forefingers on noses, advising people to shush and running down campus hills in a Flying V formation, also naked, flapping their arms and making "caw" noises.
Proudly describing themselves as more narcissists than naturalists, the streakers, most of whom say they are on the fringes of campus life and washouts from youth athletic programs, are not authorized in any way by Hamilton College or the N.C.A.A., and they obviously do not have the more common trappings of team play, like uniforms. All they come equipped with is deadpan humor and sneakers.
Theater of the absurd, meet intercollegiate sports.
The streaking at Hamilton started several years ago, but it was a more loosely aligned group that did most of its streaking on campus, generally during school events. But at some point in the last year - no one is sure precisely when - they had a collective brainstorm.
"We kept referring to ourselves as a team," said Craig Moores, a senior studio arts major, "and then it dawned on us that if we were truly a team, we'd have to have away games."
What constitutes victory when they play other colleges is open to some discussion. Pete Holzaepfel, a lanky and affable senior government major with political ambitions, said that on the one hand, if a member of the other school joins them in streaking, Hamilton loses, or at best plays to a draw. On the other hand, he added, he has ambivalence about this as an accurate measurement of performance, because as they streak they shout to encourage others to join in.
Matthew Himmel, a biology major in his senior year, said the essential element of a victorious streak is that it be done in front of a lot of people. "After all, if no one saw you, did you, in fact, streak?"
As eager as the team was to test its mettle at other schools, some of the roughly two dozen members admit that they went the route of intercollegiate sports only because streaking at Hamilton had grown stale. Alex Klivecka, a junior majoring in religious studies, said that even when he ran in a mask, people on the school's paths were greeting him by name.
The team members still streak their own campus on special occasions, but their focus has turned outward. The team spent fall break in early October together in a 30-foot recreational vehicle, streaking at all the schools in Hamilton's athletic league, the New England Small College Athletic Conference. Three team members were detained by the police at Wellesley, but they have not yet been charged.
"They kept asking us what cause we were streaking for," said Mr. Moores, "so we finally had to start throwing some causes out there, but look - we're just not nudists for Nader."
As with varsity football teams and even the marching band, an away game offers the opportunity for team members to bond on the road.
Mr. Holzaepfel, who said he had a creeping feeling that this is just the sort of youthful discretion that will get him in trouble on a future campaign trail, is currently trying, with his teammates, to formulate some sort of catch-all to explain away his actions.
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Sean Tice, a junior who is majoring in both English and religious studies, said that talk also circled toward how philosophers like Heidegger might interpret their acts before coming to the realization that harnessing Heidegger to naked sprints in public seems, at best, a reach. Said Mr. Tice: "It's just getting an adrenaline rush without having to play two and a half hours of sports."
Lauren Thomsen, who started streaking only this year, as a senior, concurred. She said she was more than hesitant at first, though intrigued, and figured that in her last year and with a career in architecture, not politics, in front of her, she had little to lose and a liberating feeling to gain.
The team starts by arriving on campus and formulating a plan of attack while fully clothed, disguised as that school's students.
At Colgate recently, they first figured that they would run through the main portion of campus, and two floors of the student center, before going into the woods to undress.
Mr. Holzaepfel gave the team a pregame talk, though it was a short and modest one. The team was fearful of being caught, not to mention somewhat chilly.
Off they went, imploring Colgate students to strip (none did), and then back to their cars, which, as bad luck would have it, were parked in a lot next to a building where Colgate's president was holding a meeting.
"We've done a lot of bad planning historically," said Lydia Kiesling, a senior comparative literature major. "That's usually the X-factor."
The team was hemmed into the parking lot by three campus security vehicles, backed by the Hamilton Village police.
Andy Glossner, a junior chemistry major, looked ashen. If this police matter delayed him, he would miss an exam in physical chemistry, he wailed.
"Physical chemistry?" repeated Ms. Kiesling. "As opposed to what, mental chemistry?"
Jeff Verry, one of the campus security officers, was on his first day on the job. One gets the sense that if it were up to him, the streakers would go free.
"It was probably a bad judgment call," he said, "but you are only young once."
Another security officer offered paternal advice. "Next time," he told them, "think before you act."
"That's the problem," answered one of the streakers, "we did."
Then the Hamilton Village police charged everyone with disorderly conduct.