I'm sceptical about these marriages to chandeliers and so on. I suspect they are simply manifestations of our era's most common mental health issue: Attention Seeking Disorder.
However, if we forget for a moment the "sex" with the object and the silliness of the "marriage" to it, how many of us have never acted as if we have
some sort of relationship with an inanimate object?
Have you never patted your old and "faithful" car on the bonnet and muttered "Well done, old girl" after a long journey? Does your car have a name? Have you ever implored a recalcitrant motorbike to start? Every sailor calls their boat "she" and has a definite feeling that the boat itself is part of the crew. And if you count all this as "sentimentality," then fair enough, but when you stub your toe on a brick, do you swear at yourself, or at the brick?
If, like
@Souleater , I had lost a favourite hammer, I would ask "where the bloody thing was hiding," rather than "where I'd bloody put it." (I hope you find it, by the way.)
There are few if any of us who have never acted towards an inanimate object as if it could hear us speak.
