Odd & Ill-Advised Rectal Insertions


Gone But Not Forgotten
May 1, 2003
Weird sex stuff

Then there are the 'packers'. Men and women who are obsessed with filling their anal and reproductive cavities with objects. My friend at work once showed me a pic on rotten.com once of a man in a ER having 2 small potatoes and a jar of peanut butter(chunky!) removed from his rectum. :confused:
Last edited by a moderator:
La Grange, GA - Attorney Antonio Mendoza was released from a trauma center after having a cell phone removed from his rectum. "My dog drags the thing all over the house," he said later "He must have dragged it into the shower. I slipped on the tile, tripped against the dog and sat down right on he thing". The extraction took more than three hours due to the fact that the cover to Mr Mendoza's phone had opened during insertion. "He was a real trooper during the entire episode," said Dr Dennis Crobe. "Tony just cracked jokes and really seemed to be enjoying himself. Three times during the extraction his phone rang and each time, he made jokes about it that just had us rolling on the floor. By the time we finished, we really did expect to find an answering machine in there"
Last edited by a moderator:
I'm yet to meet a triage nurse who can't tell a cracking tale about foreign objects in the rectum. The best variant I heard on this involved a man who came into casualty at 9pm one Friday night with a large (~not~ Giant Black African) dildo stuck you know where. My friend wasn't too phased by this, but was surprised when colleagues told her that the man came in every Friday night at 9pm with said item stuck in said location. The running joke went something like 'one week he'll only want us to change the batteries'.

Last edited by a moderator:
More rectal foreign bodies

Doctors remove beer bottle

A man with the habit of inserting odd objects into his rectum was admitted to the emergency room of National Taiwan University Hospital yesterday. Doctors spent two hours removing a bottle of Taiwan Beer he had inserted into his anus. What particularly complicated the procedure was that the bottle had been inserted wide-end first. The man was required to remain in hospital for thee days for further observation. Records of the Veterans General Hospital over the past 20 years show that the man's habit is by no means an unusual one. Other objects retrieved from anuses include flower vases, glass bottles, vibrators and table legs. The largest object ever removed was a bowling pin. One of the hospital's male patients was admitted on three separate occasions with a different object each time.


A bowling pin?

"Well doctor I was bowling in the nude and lost my balance and went sliding down the... What you don' believe me??"

Bum Luck
OC janitor owns world’s most expensive broken dildo
By R. Scott Moxley

Wednesday, November 22, 2006 - 3:00 pm

Nobody’s been compiling a list, but we’re confident that Orange County’s Marcelino P. Castro owns the most expensive broken dildo in the world at $48,000.

How the married, 42-year-old janitor single-handedly converted a simple, mail-order dildo into an historic artifact is a painful tale that requires us to start at the very beginning.

Last February, Castro was elated when the sex toy he ordered arrived in the mail. This dildo had an attached handle so a user could manipulate its motion from different angles. Castro decided to pleasure himself. During the heat of passion, the handle broke off and the dildo became lodged deep in his rectum.

In similar circumstances, others might have seen a doctor immediately. But Castro slept overnight on his predicament and woke to launch himself on a course that guaranteed his private horror would spiral into a humiliating public spectacle.

The next morning, Castro told his bosses, police, paramedics, firemen, state insurance investigators and later emergency room doctors that he’d been gang-raped at work by “two large dark men, probably Samoan.”

He said he’d been cleaning an office bathroom the previous night when the rapists grabbed him, put a rope around his neck, placed a damp cloth over his mouth, yanked his pants down and sodomized him so vigorously that he passed out.

“When I woke up, I was alone in the restroom with my pants down to my knees,” said Castro, who implied the Samoans must have inserted the dildo.

He was rushed to the ER, where doctors surgically removed the sex toy.

The possible return of the angry Samoans so alarmed the managers of Castro’s office building that they spent $4,000 to change all the locks. Police investigators, too, took the complaint seriously—until they concluded the rape story was a piece of fiction. In August, police arrested Castro. He pleaded not guilty and was released on $50,000 bail.

The Weekly broke the story (“Das Booty”), which prompted Castro defense attorney Jeff Tatch to attack our report.

“I am ashamed that this piece of journalism was published with inaccurate information in it,” said Tatch. He declined to be specific.

On Nov. 15, Castro—named one of Orange County’s Scariest People in the Weekly’s annual Halloween issue—confessed to four felony counts including falsifying insurance claims. Though he faced up to eight years in state prison, he’ll report Jan. 12 to the Orange County Jail for a six-month sentence, serve five years’ probation and pay $48,000 in restitution for wasting everyone’s time.
Wired Iraqi man triggers scare at L.A. airport

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - An Iraqi national wearing wires and concealing a magnet inside his rectum triggered a security scare at Los Angeles International Airport on Tuesday but officials said he posed no apparent threat.

The man, identified by law enforcement officials as Fadhel al-Maliki, 35, set off an alarm during passenger screening at the airport early on Tuesday morning.

A police bomb squad was called to examine what was deemed a suspicious item found during a body cavity search of the man. Local media reports said a magnet was found in his rectum.

"He was secreting these items in a body cavity and that was a great concern because there were also some electric wires associated with that body cavity," Larry Fetters, security director for the Transportation Security Administration at the airport, told reporters.

Maliki, 35, who lives in Atlantic City, New Jersey, was preparing to board a US Airways flight from Los Angeles to Philadelphia.

The flight left without Maliki but with his luggage aboard. It made an unscheduled landing in Las Vegas, where the plane was thoroughly searched but nothing was found, officials said.

Passengers were not evacuated and no flights were disrupted by the incident at Terminal One at Los Angeles airport.

"There never was a threat," Fetter said.

He said police and the FBI were called in from "an abundance of caution" because Maliki was "so bizarre in his behavior."

Maliki, who had a U.S. green card, was being questioned by immigration officials about his immigration status.

It doesn´t seem to say anything about why he did it. Perhaps he had prostate cancer and went with the belief that magnets have healing powers.
Are bum magnets used to stop your arse falling off? :shock:

However, methinks that the attached wires suggest a new mobile phone charging system - clench, relax, clench, relax, clench, relax. Someone should patent it.
Or perhaps he'd lost a thermometer up there and hoped the magnet would draw it out? :?
Or perhaps he was a terrorist just testing out airport security?
I 've heard of people using strong-gauss magnets to treat painful hemorrhoids. Successfully or not, I don't know.
Maybe he should be deported...
Maybe he did it because he has a body cavity search fetish and finds pleasure in being violated by complete strangers???
Maybe he had a "shoulder massager" which had a strong magnetic field?
Maybe he's just weird - why didn't anyone think to ask him why he had a magnet stuck up his arse?
Maybe he'd been an alien abduction victim, closer study might show the magnet to be some sort of alien tracking device with the wires working as an arial?

Or maybe he'd got drunk the night before and his mates, knowing he was going on a plane the next day, put it there while he was unconcious for a laugh?
Maybe he likes to pick up spoons with his arse? A novel way of stirring his tea.
I assume his luggage carried the sticker, "My other arse-magnet is a Bentley!" :shock:
maybe he'd swallowed a lump of iron and the magnet was attracted to it.
Apparently vets have something called cow magnets, which they lower into the intestinal tract of a cow if it has accidentally eaten bits of metal. Might be something similar.
Iraqi stopped at LAX in bizarre incident had priors
By Doug Irving

An Iraqi national stopped last week at Los Angeles International Airport with a metal object hidden inside his body now faces deportation after immigration agents discovered two violent convictions in his past.

Fadhel Al-Maliki, 35, is being held at a Terminal Island detention center on immigration offenses related to his prior arrests for domestic violence and a weapons violation. His case will go before an immigration judge, who could order him sent back to Iraq.

Al-Maliki drew a full bomb-squad response last week when he tried to pass through security at LAX with two objects in his rectum. He later told investigators he was using the objects to fight stress; they were described as a polished stone and a magnet or piece of metal covered in a puttylike substance and wrapped in a napkin.

The FBI found no reason to think Al-Maliki posed a threat, and no evidence of any links to terrorism. The agency turned him over to Immigration and Customs Enforcement because his green card documents had expired.

"The activity, although strange, does not constitute a federal offense," FBI spokeswoman Laura Eimiller said.

But immigration agents reviewing Al-Maliki's case found that he had been convicted in the past for domestic violence and for possession of an illegal weapon, said Lori Haley, a spokeswoman for the immigration agency. Those convictions violate the terms of his status as a permanent U.S. resident and make him subject to deportation, she said.

She had no further details about those earlier convictions, such as when or where they happened. Police in Atlantic City, N.J., where Al-Maliki lives, said they have no record of arresting him; his name also does not appear in a register of New Jersey state prison inmates.

But a newspaper account from 2003 indicates that a man named Fadhel Al-Maliki was arrested near a train station in Atlantic City after he was spotted hiding in some bushes. He was carrying a 9-inch knife, according to the report, and transit police booked him on charges of trespassing and possessing a weapon.

An immigration judge will decide whether Al-Maliki should be deported, and to where. Deportees are usually returned to their countries of origin, but the situation in Iraq might make it difficult to get Al-Maliki the travel documents he needs. He could be sent to another country because of that, Haley said.

The judge also could order Al-Maliki to undergo a mental examination.

Haley did not know when the deportation proceedings would begin. "Sometimes, they take a little time," she said.

Al-Maliki came to the United States in the mid-1990s and had lived in Atlantic City as a permanent U.S. resident. He was returning to Philadelphia on March 6 after a one-day visit in Los Angeles when he was stopped at LAX.

A security screener had pulled him aside for extra screening, and noticed that the metal-detector wand kept going off as it passed his midsection. Al-Maliki immediately acknowledged that he had objects inside his body that would set off the metal detector, federal agents said.

The Los Angeles Police Department's bomb squad responded but declared the objects nonthreatening. Nonetheless, the US Airways flight that Al-Maliki had planned to take was diverted to Las Vegas after it took off, and its 143 passengers were rescreened as a precaution.

So wires, a lump of metal and a plasticine-like material. It does sound like he was trying to see if he could get a bomb through customs.
Although that it happened in an airport called Lax is kind of funny.
He later told investigators he was using the objects to fight stress;

Ah! It's a relaxation device. Just like all those "stress relieving" personal massagers I see advertised in "health" catalogues. You know, the ones shaped like vibrators.
gncxx said:
Maybe he likes to pick up spoons with his arse? A novel way of stirring his tea.

Maybe he can bend them with his arse too. That might piss Uri Geller off.
funnily enough, there's a japanses fetish that i forget the name of that involves women doing caligraphy with the brush stook up their bum...
'cos someone gave me a link to a page on japanese puppy girls, and i clicked one of the links from it (which was in kanji so i'd no idea what it was) and found that...
Terrorist hid explosives in his bottom
Suicide bomber Abdullah Hassan Tali al-Asiri attempted to kill a Saudi prince by detonating explosives hidden in his bottom.
Published: 7:18AM BST 21 Sep 2009

Al-Asiri, 23, managed to blow himself up in the attack in Jeddah, but his target, Prince Mohammed Bin Nayef, escaped with minor injuries.

Security experts said they have not come across a bomber who has concealed explosives in this way.

"We've never heard of anything quite like this before," a source told The Sun.

Prince Nayef is the head of the security service in Saudi Arabia.

Al-Asiri, who was on a local "Most Wanted" list, arranged a meeting with him after insisting he had turned his back on terrorism.

By hiding the explosives in his bottom he managed to pass security checks before entering the prince's office.

It is believed they were detonated electronically.

Mike Yardley, a weapons expert and former soldier, said: "Hiding it in a body cavity was obviously an attempt to defeat scanners and detectors.

"Thankfully on this occasion the victim escaped because the bomber's body appears to have suppressed the force of the blast."

Prince Nayef, who had led an anti-terror crackdown in Saudi Arabia, injured his hand.

He said: "He surprised me by blowing himself up." :shock:

The location of the hidden bomb was reported by Al-Arabiya TV news network, based in Dubai, and fanatics confirmed the method during online discussions.

al-Qaeda later named the bomber and released his photograph together with a statement claiming responsibility for the attack.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstop ... ottom.html
Perhaps if he had been eating baked beans beforehand, it would have increased the force of the explosion.