OK guys, this is a long response.
@Frideswide, what is NT? Neuro-typical or the NT as in INTJ or ENTJ, etc.?
I’ve thought some more about people who feel wrong. Also, the book “The Gift of Fear” by de Becker.
Putting aside all the times I have been uneasy about someone - uneasy being the operative word – I have two experiences to relate. Each of which illustrates a different point.
1. When I was 18 years old, attending university but very much messed up and depressed by my childhood, I was walking down the street one evening. At that time, I daily battled the negative voices in my head, who spoke in my mother’s voice (duh). I was having one of these arguments in my head when I passed 3 men on the sidewalk. One was a local spiritual guru and just behind him were his two hulking Chinese bodyguards.
The guru looked in my face as we passed and I was instantly so scared I thought I would faint. He did nothing threatening and said nothing. The voices in my head all stopped as I was terrified and focused on not getting hurt by this guy.
In this instance, my fear of him was misplaced as I was just afraid of everyone at the time. Apparently. A few years later, I found out from the local newspapers that multiple charges of sexual and physical violence were filed against him. But I still think my fear was a projection of my fucked-up internal state.
2. Decades later, my husband and I were in a high-end enclosed shopping mall in Indianapolis, Indiana. It was mid-afternoon. We were relaxed and laughing about Christmas shopping. We were walking back to the parking garage along an interior corridor. There was nobody else in sight or sound. Suddenly, both my husband and I stopped and went on alert. Physically, for me it was as if the air pressure changed and time slowed down. He asked me “Do you feel that?” I said “Yes but what is it?” We both thought we were in danger somehow. The menace was palpable. This is not purple prose or exaggeration. I’m trying to get the details correct because it was such an extraordinary experience.
A few seconds later, as we still stood there, a group of about six female gang members, rigged out in full Crips colors, came around a corner, swaggering towards us. When they saw us, they straightened up their posture,
slowed down, and glared at us without speaking. Classic intimidation. My husband and I both know how to handle ourselves in physical confrontations, and how to size up the best response (1. Leave. 2. Diffuse. 3. Confront. 4. Fight).
My husband and I glared back, not breaking eye contact, as the gang bangers stalked past us. (BTW, this was response #3 confrontation.) Nobody said a word. After they were about 15 feet past us, we resumed our walk – now slowed down ourselves – to the parking garage, without looking back. After such an adrenalin rush, I felt as if I was going to throw up.
My husband and I discussed this for the entire journey back to our home. We decided it was real and not just a coincidence. Noteworthy: he and I both felt it and it changed our behavior before we commented on it. Our sense of danger was confirmed by the danger of the appearing gang members. Our sense of danger gave us a few seconds to compose ourselves and ready ourselves for a possible physical fight. Neither my husband nor I go around braced for bullshit or thinking that danger is just around the corner.
In this instance, we both received a clear (paranormal?) warning before any normal sight or sound of danger occurred. I am very glad of it. This warning has nothing to do with my fucked-up caution of people. This warning was the gift of fear.
This mall went on to have such a gang problem that some stores closed. It greatly increased the presence of police and security guards – eating into the profits – and the problem was managed.
