People Who Feel Wrong

[Austin Popper]

I've been in a few scary situations in my lifetime. Luckily, I came out unharmed each time. I think I have some type of guardian watching over me.

If the Guardian Angel thing works the way it is often presented in popular entertainment, then I'll have a full time job for a considerable stretch when my time comes, if it's a matter of balancing the books.

 

[Giant R]

Thirty odd years ago when I was at work we were approached by a firm who sold remainder books to see whether the library was interested in purchasing them. (Yes there was a lot of good stuff we could use extra copies of etc.)

The lady, let’s call her Carol as it wasn’t her name, who ran the firm offered to bring a few boxes over for us to see. At the time we were based in a basement so she had brought six boxes to the top of the stairs. Our porter, let’s call him Jim as that wasn’t his name either was there a large chap, ex army, he immediately volunteered to bring them downstairs.

Carol about five foot three and quite petite said; “Oh let’s take two each.” And promptly picked two up and took them downstairs. I picked two up and followed thinking that she’d certainly known which two to pick as mine were uncomfortably heavy. At the time I was moving boxes of books quite a lot and believe me these were heavy.

Jim followed and offered to unpack the boxes while I got some coffee. I saw him frowning and lifting each of the boxes before unpacking them.

After the meeting and Carol had left Jim came up to me and before I could say that I had picked the wrong boxes to lift he said. “All those boxes weighed about the same you know. There aren’t many times that I’ve picked up something that I’ve seen some bloke shift and think it was heavy; but those boxes nearly pulled my arms out their sockets. There’s nothing of her and she shifted them like they were full of feathers.”

If Jim hadn’t said anything I probably would have forgotten the whole thing, thinking that I was just having a feeble day but because he did it stuck in my mind.

Just shows that you can’t always judge strength on appearances.

A few years ago we were changing a boiler and the old one was a big cast iron floor standing one. As we were carrying it out between us and puffing away a pick up truck stopped and a woman got out, only about 5.3" or 5'4" and probably in her 50s. She asked if we were going to dump it, which we were, and she said she would take it. We were pleased not to have to get it in the back of our van and said she could have the casing, flue and other bits and pieces too.
We went back inside to round them up and when we came out again we were just in time to see her lifting the boiler, on her own, and with little effort it seemed, into the back of the pick up.

 

[catseye]

A few years ago we were changing a boiler and the old one was a big cast iron floor standing one. As we were carrying it out between us and puffing away a pick up truck stopped and a woman got out, only about 5.3" or 5'4" and probably in her 50s. She asked if we were going to dump it, which we were, and she said she would take it. We were pleased not to have to get it in the back of our van and said she could have the casing, flue and other bits and pieces too.
We went back inside to round them up and when we came out again we were just in time to see her lifting the boiler, on her own, and with little effort it seemed, into the back of the pick up.

When I worked on a farm I used to be able to load a trailer with haybales from the field, in proper pattern and thrown right to the top of the trailer. Now, whenever I had to feed horses, I'm puffing just dragging a single bale out of the barn. Sigh. It's more being out of practice than old age, or that's what I tell myself anyway.

 

[PeteS]

On a ride last year we stopped to offer help to two young women. They were trying to replace a stubborn tyre.

I said, 'What you need is a man's touch! ' and we all laughed as Techy popped the tyre back on in about a second.

That's what I keep him for.

You see men do have their uses, usually digging women out of the tish. Least that's what I tell Ms P, although I have my suspicions that she disagrees.

 

[escargot]

You see men do have their uses, usually digging women out of the tish. Least that's what I tell Ms P, although I have my suspicions that she disagrees.

Yup, men, where would we girls be without'em?

I always say Men, I've nothing against'em. I like'em.
Couldn't eat a whole one though.

Tried a few times.

 

[Floyd]

When I worked on a farm I used to be able to load a trailer with haybales from the field, in proper pattern and thrown right to the top of the trailer. Now, whenever I had to feed horses, I'm puffing just dragging a single bale out of the barn. Sigh. It's more being out of practice than old age, or that's what I tell myself anyway.

I get a bit out of breath putting my trousers on these days. When did getting dressed become so difficult?

 

[escargot]

I get a bit out of breath putting my trousers on these days. When did getting dressed become so difficult?

When I get out of breath putting my trousers on I put it down to the current enormity of my belly.

 

[Floyd]

When I get out of breath putting my trousers on I put it down to the current enormity of my belly.

I seem to fall over quite a bit as well. Belly? Thought you bi-cyclists were like racing snakes?

 

[catseye]

I seem to fall over quite a bit as well. Belly? Thought you bi-cyclists were like racing snakes?

You may need to work on your core, Floyd.

 

[escargot]

I seem to fall over quite a bit as well. Belly? Thought you bi-cyclists were like racing snakes?

It's all relative innit.

While I am fit as feck for a 63-and-a-half-year-old I'm still also fat.

 

[Bigphoot2]

It's all relative innit.

While I am fit as feck for a 63-and-a-half-year-old I'm still also fat.

It's not fat, it's relaxed muscle

 

[Lobeydosser]

Putin is scary AF. I remember a few years ago when Andrew Lloyd Webber wrote our Eurovision entry and did a stunt where he travelled round Europe asking famous people to vote for our entry. One of the people was Putin. This was a short, humorous stunt with a full camera crew and probably entirely scripted and ALW looked TERRIFIED.

On the other hand I quite like Putin and find Andrew Lloyd Webber extremely offputing.

 

[Mythopoeika]

On the other hand I quite like Putin and find Andrew Lloyd Webber extremely offputing.

You know where you are with Putin.

 

[Spudrick68]

Like Garfield, I'm under tall.

 

[cycleboy2]

I seem to fall over quite a bit as well. Belly? Thought you bi-cyclists were like racing snakes?

Even the best cyclist who ever lived - Eddy Merckx - isn't exactly a racing snake these days, but he's still the coolest sportsperson who ever lived!

Here he is along with a pic of the younger and more racing-snake-like and uber-cool Eddy! I'm sure the older Eddy would still beat me over any distance one would choose to race against him...

 

[GerdaWordyer]

When I get out of breath putting my trousers on I put it down to the current enormity of my belly.

Must be that wriggly gem/rhinestone down there.

 

[Bad Bungle]

The bus home tonight stopped at a Bus stop - it's what buses do, but I've never stopped at that Bus stop before. Door opens and it's a looong pause before a man gets on. Bus driver asks him to put a mask on please - he hasn't got one but attempts to pull his jacket up over his mouth (indicating that he wasn't exempt). She shoos him off the bus and closes the door, switches off the engine and gets out of her cab. Under her seat are some spare masks, she opens the door, gives him the mask, closes the door, gets back into the cab and restarts the engine. Driver then lets masked man on and asks where he wanted to go - a single to the end of the line. He pays by card but there was a problem, the card is not accepted. Second attempt, same result. Driver resets the ticket machine and he tries again but the card is not even recognised by the reader as being present. He has no money, wants to try again but Driver points out that she has to move off (6 minutes spent so far). Fourth and fifth attempt on card reader and driver asks him to leave bus.
Maybe the man was a wrong-un, maybe he was just stoned or unlucky, maybe the rest of us passengers felt a little relieved when he got off the bus and we carried on our way.

 

[Earthly oddity]

The bus home tonight stopped at a Bus stop - it's what buses do, but I've never stopped at that Bus stop before. Door opens and it's a looong pause before a man gets on. Bus driver asks him to put a mask on please - he hasn't got one but attempts to pull his jacket up over his mouth (indicating that he wasn't exempt). She shoos him off the bus and closes the door, switches off the engine and gets out of her cab. Under her seat are some spare masks, she opens the door, gives him the mask, closes the door, gets back into the cab and restarts the engine. Driver then lets masked man on and asks where he wanted to go - a single to the end of the line. He pays by card but there was a problem, the card is not accepted. Second attempt, same result. Driver resets the ticket machine and he tries again but the card is not even recognised by the reader as being present. He has no money, wants to try again but Driver points out that she has to move off (6 minutes spent so far). Fourth and fifth attempt on card reader and driver asks him to leave bus.
Maybe the man was a wrong-un, maybe he was just stoned or unlucky, maybe the rest of us passengers felt a little relieved when he got off the bus and we carried on our way.

I was on a bus once when this man tried to scan his hand on the reader. He had a chess or draughts board under his arm. When challenged he said he was a time traveller from the future who had travelled back....I think he said from 2024 but I am not 100% certain of that year....

Anyway, there was a bit of a conversation and I think he got off in the end....He had some story that didn't seem to make sense about coming back. I think he got confused as he was telling it....

Apart from the fact he was holding up the bus I found it a little bit entertaining......

 

[Spudrick68]

My wife was coming home from work one evening in a less than salubrious area. She passed a man standing at a bus stop who asked her what time the next helicopter was due.

 

[Ghost In The Machine]

Even the best cyclist who ever lived - Eddy Merckx - isn't exactly a racing snake these days, but he's still the coolest sportsperson who ever lived!

Here he is along with a pic of the younger and more racing-snake-like and uber-cool Eddy! I'm sure the older Eddy would still beat me over any distance one would choose to race against him...

I enjoyed this book, a couple years back:

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Put-Me-Bac...ooks&sprefix=tom+simpson,stripbooks,73&sr=1-3

(About Tom Simpson, the British cyclist who died during the Tour de France in 1967, for the non cyclist people). Something very cool about 1960s' racing.

 

[Cochise]

It's not fat, it's relaxed muscle

Yep. That's exactly what I tell people about my man boobs.

 

[Bigphoot2]

Yep. That's exactly what I tell people about my man boobs.

I tell them my expanding waistline is a fuel tank for a sex machine.

 

[escargot]

I tell them my expanding waistline is a fuel tank for a sex machine.

My brother once insulted a colleague about the size of Colleague's arse. Colleague replied 'Yer need yer big 'ammer ter knock a big nail in!'
TOP railway banter there.

 

[PeteS]

Ms P has, from time to time, to employ agency workers due to staff shortages. A new to her company owner made contact recently asking if they were in need of agency staff because they had a few new recruits. Ms P didn't like the sound of the guy but decided to try them out with one worker for a couple of days. On the second day said worker (working legally in the UK) asked if he could have a word. He was concerned that the employer had taken his passport off him and wouldn't give it back and that he was living in a small house with 10 other people. Was this normal in the UK? Straight on phone to the Police who took the matter very seriously. Nothing further was heard of the company.

 

[Ogdred Weary]

The bus home tonight stopped at a Bus stop - it's what buses do, but I've never stopped at that Bus stop before. Door opens and it's a looong pause before a man gets on. Bus driver asks him to put a mask on please - he hasn't got one but attempts to pull his jacket up over his mouth (indicating that he wasn't exempt). She shoos him off the bus and closes the door, switches off the engine and gets out of her cab. Under her seat are some spare masks, she opens the door, gives him the mask, closes the door, gets back into the cab and restarts the engine. Driver then lets masked man on and asks where he wanted to go - a single to the end of the line. He pays by card but there was a problem, the card is not accepted. Second attempt, same result. Driver resets the ticket machine and he tries again but the card is not even recognised by the reader as being present. He has no money, wants to try again but Driver points out that she has to move off (6 minutes spent so far). Fourth and fifth attempt on card reader and driver asks him to leave bus.
Maybe the man was a wrong-un, maybe he was just stoned or unlucky, maybe the rest of us passengers felt a little relieved when he got off the bus and we carried on our way.

Not sure what "felt wrong" about this guy?

 

[michael59]

Not sure what "felt wrong" about this guy?

I'd have paid his way. It happens a lot, people paying for others in stores, buses, even in the drive through. the person in front of me paid $5 toward my meal at Mcdonalds last time I was there. I've seen clerks at the tills pay for a customer who was short of funds many times.

 

[Sollywos]

I'd have paid his way. It happens a lot, people paying for others in stores, buses, even in the drive through. the person in front of me paid $5 toward my meal at Mcdonalds last time I was there. I've seen clerks at the tills pay for a customer who was short of funds many times.

About 20 years ago I found myself short of 20p or thereabouts when it came to pay in the offy and, as I was about to put one item back the next customer offered to pay for me. Not so big a deal you may think ... except that it was one of the local tramps! I accepted as it seemed it was a real pleasure for him to be on the giving end for once, going by his big beaming smile .

Of course I've done the same thing myself ... do as you would be done by, pay the luck forward and all that.

 

[Ronnie Jersey]

Not sure what "felt wrong" about this guy?

Oh that's a normal every-day occurrence here! LOL - I meant the mask thing, they are very strict, NO admittance to buses without a mask.

 

[Ronnie Jersey]

Never really knew what a sociopath was, let alone suspected I had a family member with that description.
My younger brother was always a charmer, charismatic personality, spoiled rotten, always laughing and joking, the first person you would invite to your party if you wanted to have fun!
As we grew older, I noticed he always seemed to have trouble keeping a job, or a girlfriend, or money, or an apartment, his life was always in chaos. I got him a job in a large company where I had a good position - next thing you know, he was fired for theft and I was called in for questioning, they thought I was in on it. I didn't even know what he was up to, he was constantly in trouble.
My husband never liked my brother, and warned me repeatedly about him, but I just turned a blind eye to it. My brother got himself a job as a superintendent in a large garden apartment complex, with a free apartment as part of the job. Of course, one day he showed up on our doorstep, got fired from his job (too much drinking and drugs) and lost the apartment. Softy that I am, I allowed him to move into our rented small house. Hubby and I were going on a vacation down to the shore for a few weeks and thought he could look after the house while we were away.
No one can imagine our shock upon returning, all of our antique furniture was gone, my jewelry, cash, living room and bedroom furniture, everything was gone, except for a few items of clothing. He had sold everything and took off.
When I think about it now, I cannot believe that I looked into those eyes and failed to see the sociopath lurking there.

 

[PeteS]

Never really knew what a sociopath was, let alone suspected I had a family member with that description.
My younger brother was always a charmer, charismatic personality, spoiled rotten, always laughing and joking, the first person you would invite to your party if you wanted to have fun!
As we grew older, I noticed he always seemed to have trouble keeping a job, or a girlfriend, or money, or an apartment, his life was always in chaos. I got him a job in a large company where I had a good position - next thing you know, he was fired for theft and I was called in for questioning, they thought I was in on it. I didn't even know what he was up to, he was constantly in trouble.
My husband never liked my brother, and warned me repeatedly about him, but I just turned a blind eye to it. My brother got himself a job as a superintendent in a large garden apartment complex, with a free apartment as part of the job. Of course, one day he showed up on our doorstep, got fired from his job (too much drinking and drugs) and lost the apartment. Softy that I am, I allowed him to move into our rented small house. Hubby and I were going on a vacation down to the shore for a few weeks and thought he could look after the house while we were away.
No one can imagine our shock upon returning, all of our antique furniture was gone, my jewelry, cash, living room and bedroom furniture, everything was gone, except for a few items of clothing. He had sold everything and took off.
When I think about it now, I cannot believe that I looked into those eyes and failed to see the sociopath lurking there.

Funnily enough an ex of mine had a brother just like that. He would turn up when in ( seemingly permanent) trouble, until I chucked him out , with the approval of said ex. Weirdly, he had a lot of great skills and could have made a good life for himself. No idea whether he turned his life round - I hope he did.