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Hollywood's Pointless Remakes, Reboots, Prequels & Sequels

As long as they come up with new characters, I'd rather like to see new Cannonball movies.
 
The Gumball Rally was better than The Cannonball Run.
 
one of my first screen loves

after that chick in the vikings
 
I can't even imagine who's going to be the doctor in the remake.
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"The Only Thing More Terrifying Than The Last 12 Minutes Of This Film Are The First 92."

Suspiria is a really "immersive" horror movie, to use that rubbish word, but it fits, it's a full on sensory overload of sound and vision and general hysteria. It's almost experimental only it has that fairy tale plot about the princess vanquishing the wicked witch.

The remake is by someone whose last film featured Ralph Fiennes very naked, which may be just as scary to some people.
Sorry, not fond of Argento at all and Suspiria is really just horrible...
 
At the risk of being that plum in the pince-nez who scratches his chin and pronounces that your dislike is because you 'don't get it', Argento's films show an incredible eye in the setup of every shot which really is far too good for the ropey often nonsensical plots he is putting up on screen. That said logic has never been a strong point in Italian giallo movies. Suspiria has a genuinely dream like quality and the use of a primary pallet to light each scene and the intense sountrack from The Goblins makes for an unforgettable experience.

All of that said, his recent (well this century really) output has been utter gash and the typical giallo setup of pretty girl getting killed in an unpleasant way is incredibly misogynistic and outdated, but then these are movies of their time. He was a student of Sergio Leone, so you can't help but wonder what he could've made of a decent budget and a decent script.
 
Judging by Dracula 3D, Argento was kidnapped at the turn of the millennium and replaced by an evil, substandard clone who really wanted to see his daughter naked.
 
Judging by Dracula 3D, Argento was kidnapped at the turn of the millennium and replaced by an evil, substandard clone who really wanted to see his daughter naked.
Asia Agento once produced and starred in her own porno flick so I've read .. I'd watch it but I wouldn't know where to start finding it ... the last thing I saw her in was Land of the Dead but she was clothed in that one.
 
Asia Agento once produced and starred in her own porno flick so I've read .. I'd watch it but I wouldn't know where to start finding it ...
That would be Scarlet Diva. It's not a porno, but apparently most of the sex is real, you don't see the bits going in and out.

It's an autobiographical tale of life as an actress, with sleazy Italian producers, sleazy fans, drugs, and rock-star boyfriends who dump you by going a world tour, but leave you their silver trousers. I met her at a premiere once and she was wearing those trousers.

A couple of years ago I saw her 3rd film at a festival, another autobiographical tale of when her father split from her mother (actress Daria Nicoldi) and she was shunted between the two of them. It was really good but seems to have disappeared.

EDIT: As this is the Remake thread, I'll point out she called the director of the upcoming remake of her father's Suspiria a "c*nt" on Twitter...
 
Oh dear:

Hawaii Five-0 Actors Quit After Being Paid Less Than White Co...
NBC's Richard Lui talks with actor Brian Yang and writer Melissa Sliverstein about minority pay discrepancies, following the decision by two Asian actors on "Hawaii Five-0" to leave the series because they are paid less than their white co-stars.

MSN
 
Lord Of The Flies is being remade ... again ... this time it's school girls trapped on the island instead. It might be good ?, I'll wait and see without pre judgement although it does sound more of a gimmick move to me. I can't wait for Thelma & Louise to be remade as Steve & Barry.

http://www.aintitcool.com/node/78452
 
Lord Of The Flies is being remade ... again ... this time it's school girls trapped on the island instead. It might be good ?, I'll wait and see without pre judgement although it does sound more of a gimmick move to me. I can't wait for Thelma & Louise to be remade as Steve & Barry.

http://www.aintitcool.com/node/78452

It can only be better than the 90s version. Cynics on this casting might say that they survivors get on fine until they are rescued, the end.
 
I've wondered why there's not be a remake of "When Worlds Collide" (probably by Roland Emmerich).
 
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I've wondered why there's not be a reamke of "When Worlds Colliede" (probably by Roland Emmerich).

That I wouldn't mind seeing, if done correctly. If done badly, it would turn out like 2012
 
I'm not sure that, after 2 - 3 decades of scientific and fictional focus on the planet-killing potential in a modest-sized asteroid, anyone would treat a collision between entire planets as a plausible premise.
 
It can only be better than the 90s version. Cynics on this casting might say that they survivors get on fine until they are rescued, the end.
I was thinking the same thing GNC, the 90's version missed the point that the school boys came from a polite middle class back ground and then turned into savages in the original ... and the cynics have clearly never worked in all female work place .. girls can be just as cruel if not worse than boys. I'm hoping this remake will be set in the same era as the original.
 
I've wondered why there's not be a reamke of "When Worlds Colliede" (probably by Roland Emmerich).

It was remade, loosely, as Deep Impact (or at least Deep Impact started out as a remake). Which is not a very exciting film, even with the end of the world impending.
 
I watched the FLATLINERS remake a few months ago and it was dreadful, I can't argue that the original film's characters were likeable either (the pervert who covertly filmed his sexual encounters being the worst) but these millennials were extremely obnoxious .. I was hoping none of them would be brought back, especially after that scene where they smash up the flat and run out into the snow for no reason at all .. I haven't watched this review by Mark Kermode yet but I'll be shocked if he liked this remake ..

 
Actually, I think there are plenty of people at least as good as Bruce Lee working in Hong Kong films today, but I still don’t think they should remake one of his films.

Why is everyone afraid of new stories? I mean, I actually know why, but it’s a stupid reason, and it’s preventing talented creators from doing interesting things.
 
Lord Of The Flies is being remade ... again ... this time it's school girls trapped on the island instead. It might be good ?, I'll wait and see without pre judgement although it does sound more of a gimmick move to me. I can't wait for Thelma & Louise to be remade as Steve & Barry.

http://www.aintitcool.com/node/78452

If we're lucky, it'll be as good as those St Trininans remakes...
 
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