Sense Of Foreboding

gellatly68

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I felt that this didn't quite fit into the 'Premonitions' Thread, but Mods feel free to move this if necessary.

My parents went on holiday at the beginning of April - a nice little jaunt with friends, a villa and oodles of golf. As they're both active retirees with a lively social scene - they've been fortunate and hard-working enough in life to afford several holidays a year - there was nothing unusual in this. I made the usual arrangements with them re looking after their house and plants etc. So far, so normal.

Yet for two or three days before they left, I simply could not shake the thought from my mind that something terrible would happen to my dad, and I might never see him again. There was absolutely no reason at all to think this: after all, he was healthy (albeit with some long term, controlled, issues with his heart and blood pressure), he was active and in a positive, happy mood. I will also say that I have never had such a specific sense of foreboding as this before.

Anyway, off they went and got off to a good time with their friends.

Right up to 5 days after they'd gone. Early in the morning, my mum called me and told me that dad had been in an accident and was in hospital. I won't go into details, but to cut a long story short, he's still in hospital there, recovering and likely to return to the UK by the end of the week - however, his recuperation will be long and difficult.

Both my sister and I have flown out several times to be with him and give our mum practical and emotional support. While we were both there together one evening, I mentioned my sense of foreboding.

'That's funny', she said. 'I've had exactly the same feeling!'

We then mentioned it to mum, who - guess what? - said the same, except in her case she thought it would be her who'd be struck down!

It seems to me almost as if a shadow of a future event was felt. Indeed, I've often wondered whether it might be the case that somehow things that are ahead of us can, sometimes, make themselves apparent in the here and now, and this presentiment I had seems to fall into this category.
 

gellatly68

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Thanks, Myth - I think he will be: he certainly seemed to be over the worst of it when I flew back, but it'll be the recuperation period that will be tiresome and frustrating for him. At least he's coming back, and that's a good thing.
 

ramonmercado

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I felt that this didn't quite fit into the 'Premonitions' Thread, but Mods feel free to move this if necessary.

My parents went on holiday at the beginning of April - a nice little jaunt with friends, a villa and oodles of golf. As they're both active retirees with a lively social scene - they've been fortunate and hard-working enough in life to afford several holidays a year - there was nothing unusual in this. I made the usual arrangements with them re looking after their house and plants etc. So far, so normal.

Yet for two or three days before they left, I simply could not shake the thought from my mind that something terrible would happen to my dad, and I might never see him again. There was absolutely no reason at all to think this: after all, he was healthy (albeit with some long term, controlled, issues with his heart and blood pressure), he was active and in a positive, happy mood. I will also say that I have never had such a specific sense of foreboding as this before.

Anyway, off they went and got off to a good time with their friends.

Right up to 5 days after they'd gone. Early in the morning, my mum called me and told me that dad had been in an accident and was in hospital. I won't go into details, but to cut a long story short, he's still in hospital there, recovering and likely to return to the UK by the end of the week - however, his recuperation will be long and difficult.

Both my sister and I have flown out several times to be with him and give our mum practical and emotional support. While we were both there together one evening, I mentioned my sense of foreboding.

'That's funny', she said. 'I've had exactly the same feeling!'

We then mentioned it to mum, who - guess what? - said the same, except in her case she thought it would be her who'd be struck down!

It seems to me almost as if a shadow of a future event was felt. Indeed, I've often wondered whether it might be the case that somehow things that are ahead of us can, sometimes, make themselves apparent in the here and now, and this presentiment I had seems to fall into this category.
Hope all goes well.
 

GerdaWordyer

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Here's an outline of your Tuesday post with our hopes added: Your dad's spry and active. You, sis and Mum sense forboding. The acident occurs. Your dad is recovering. Your dad's quite a bit spry and active.
 

gellatly68

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Here's an outline of your Tuesday post with our hopes added: Your dad's spry and active. You, sis and Mum sense forboding. The acident occurs. Your dad is recovering. Your dad's quite a bit spry and active.
Put like that, it makes it all sound very thin. The Fortean aspect for me was this very distinct sense of foreboding - it was well beyond the vague worries and anxieties one may feel when someone you know is going away for a while. It was a specific, oppressive sense that dad was going, in some way, to receive harm and/or I wouldn't see him again. That, and the same sense was felt by my sister.

Anyway, thank you for the good wishes :)
 

XBergMann

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For a constant sense of foreboding and doom on the horizon you should try living in a country that borders Russia as I do.

I never used to have such a dark cloud following me around when I lived in other countries.
 

rynner2

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I'm still confused about the difference between a premonition and a foreboding. My copy of Roget's thesaurus is no help! And my dictionary is no better!
 

Recycled1

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Doesn't "foreboding" imply something bad is about to happen, whilst a premonition could be good, bad or just plain neutral?
 

Spudrick68

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Forbode is described as "(of a situation or occurrence) act as an advance warning of (something bad)." so my feeling is the same as you Recycled1.
 

escargot

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My youngest, when working a summer abroad, was offered a winter job in a hot place. There'd be a xmas beach-barbecue, lots of drinking, dancing, general fun - she couldn't wait! However, as the time drew near she just didn't fancy it. She reluctantly texted the people (Scandinavians) who'd put in the good word for her and found something else to do.

Come Boxing Day, she was asleep on the sofa when we learned about the tsunami which hit the exact area she'd been planning to stay at. When I woke her up with the news she wouldn't believe me.
 

Zeke Newbold

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For a constant sense of foreboding and doom on the horizon you should try living in a country that borders Russia as I do.

I never used to have such a dark cloud following me around when I lived in other countries.
Hey! Russians love their children too, mate!

I live right in the belly of the beast and don't feel I have a dark cloud following me.In Fact, on the few occasions when i get stopped to show my I.D, the politsia give me a little salute (as is their custom). You don't get such service in the old country!
 

XBergMann

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Then could you ask your leader to leave us in Ukraine alone.

Thanks
 

Zeke Newbold

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Then could you ask your leader to leave us in Ukraine alone.

Thanks
So you are actually a Ukranian? That does alter things a bit. (Sorry,I didn't read your details and had you down as an expat living in somewhere like Finland).

Putin is not my leader, and I would want something much better for Russia (and the world). I am a British citizen who teaches the English language here. I take no sides in the Ukraine/Crimea issue. To me it looks like a very tangled mess with a great deal of history behind it. Very few Westerners understand what is going on.

It is, however, very important, in our times, to prevent a new Cold War from emerging: that I do know.

Droozhbah ii mirr!
 

XBergMann

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No I am British born in Cambridge.

But I live in Kyiv with my Russian born but Ukrainian wife and 2 Ukrainian daughters where I am a partner in a small investment bank.

Getting a bit fed up with the Russians constantly calling us fascists and nazis - I mean the Prime Minister is jewish the President's wife is jewish more than a quarter of the parliament is jewish.

Indeed the terrorist groups in Donbas refer to us on one day as miserable jews and the next day as Nazis - which I guess makes for jewish Nazis which is absurd.

Anyway the sense of foreboding comes from not knowing whether I will suddenly have to be a refugee and try and escape from Kyiv towards Poland if and when Russia invades and starts bombing Kyiv. Makes for a constant worry at the back of my mind.

Having lived in places like Amsterdam, Hong Kong, Sydney and Berlin before I arrived in Kyiv 8 years ago this sense of doom is like a large grey cloud which seems to follow one around.

Bit of a clue as to my location in the flag colours in my avatar.
 

skinny

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simply could not shake the thought from my mind that something terrible would happen to my dad, and I might never see him again. There was absolutely no reason at all to think this: after all, he was healthy (albeit with some long term, controlled, issues with his heart and blood pressure), he was active and in a positive, happy mood. I will also say that I have never had such a specific sense of foreboding as this before.
Experienced something similar in March as I was traveling north alone for a camping trip - usually a very heightened sense of excitement and joy moving away from the city, but not this time. I had been listening to Nick Cave's Weeping Song when a sense of hopeless despair welled up inside me in a way that is difficult to explain. I'd never felt such an immediate and inexplicable sense of subjective dread and sorrow from deep within. I stopped the car and spent 20 minutes on the phone checking up on my direct family members, all of whom were fine. I asked my Mum to pray for me just to comfort myself a bit, something I haven't been inclined towards for many many years. I am an atheist. Nothing happened. That is all there was to it, but it was new and very unsettling. The only associated prompt for it was the song. Been a bit wary of listening to it again since.
 

escargot

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Experienced something similar in March as I was traveling north alone for a camping trip - usually a very heightened sense of excitement and joy moving away from the city, but not this time. I had been listening to Nick Cave's Weeping Song when a sense of hopeless despair welled up inside me in a way that is difficult to explain. I'd never felt such an immediate and inexplicable sense of subjective dread and sorrow from deep within. I stopped the car and spent 20 minutes on the phone checking up on my direct family members, all of whom were fine. I asked my Mum to pray for me just to comfort myself a bit, something I haven't been inclined towards for many many years. I am an atheist. Nothing happened. That is all there was to it, but it was new and very unsettling. The only associated prompt for it was the song. Been a bit wary of listening to it again since.
There's a word for that sudden feeling of sadness and fear, can't remember it, but it's a foreign term. Not panic exactly, just a fleeting sense of grief for no good reason.

We have threads on Places that make you feel sad or something, where people find that being in a particular spot makes them inexplicably unhappy. I suspect that if someone randomly has the bad feeling in a place, they might feel the same again on subsequent visits through habit.

It's all very weird. ;)
 

skinny

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I've had a quick search around for terminology but turned up nothing familiar, escargot. The feeling has no name that I'm aware of. It was a new sensation. Quite distinct.
 

rynner2

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I've had a quick search around for terminology but turned up nothing familiar, escargot. The feeling has no name that I'm aware of. It was a new sensation. Quite distinct.
I tried DDG on this to see if it came up with a technical name for this state, but without obvious success. But I did get a lot of very relevant looking hits on the topic. I don't have time to go through them now, but here's the output if someone else wants to try:

https://duckduckgo.com/?q=sudden+unexplained+feeling+of+fear

another search got overlapping results:

https://duckduckgo.com/?q=sudden+unexplained+feeling+of+dread

One of these does use a French Term -
Grand mal seizure Symptoms - Mayo Clinic

- is this what you were thinking of, Scarg?
 

skinny

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GM seizures are associated with epilepsy, I think. Ian Curtis of Joy Division suffered from those.
 

skinny

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What I experienced was very much emotional, no physical symptoms at all.
 

skinny

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I tried DDG on this to see if it came up with a technical name for this state, but without obvious success. But I did get a lot of very relevant looking hits on the topic. I don't have time to go through them now, but here's the output if someone else wants to try:

https://duckduckgo.com/?q=sudden unexplained feeling of fear

another search got overlapping results:

https://duckduckgo.com/?q=sudden unexplained feeling of dread

One of these does use a French Term -
Grand mal seizure Symptoms - Mayo Clinic

- is this what you were thinking of, Scarg?
Thanks for listing those. I've checked Cambridge and Britannica and associated thesauruses and come up with zilch of foreign origin. I was hoping for a German term for this. They seem to have a good vocab for this sort of thing.
 

uair01

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Here you go! :p

„Die Angst vor dem Tode ist die Angst ‚vor‘ dem eigensten, unbezüglichen und unüberholbaren Seinkönnen. Das Wovor dieser Angst ist das In-der-Welt-sein selbst. Das Worum dieser Angst ist das Sein-können des Daseins schlechthin.“
– Martin Heidegger: Sein und Zeit (1927)
 

Rosebud

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I had a similar experience back in 1987, I posted about it here:

http://forum.forteantimes.com/index.php?threads/saved-from-harm.50821/page-2

My sister and niece had booked to go on a ferry trip to Belgium. I had a feeling of unease which grew to outright dread over the weeks but I couldn't dissuade her from going. The day came and the Universe/Cosmic Joker/whatever stepped in and stopped her for me. The ferry was The Herald of Free Enterprise.
 

GerdaWordyer

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:eek:

Come Boxing Day, she was asleep on the sofa when we learned about the tsunami which hit the exact area she'd been planning to stay at. When I woke her up with the news she wouldn't believe me.[/QUOTE]
 

GerdaWordyer

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"Put like that, it makes it all sound very thin. The Fortean aspect for me was this very distinct sense of foreboding . . .

Anyway, thank you for the good wishes :)[/QUOTE]
Didn't mean to minimize that the foreboding wasn't strong--just wanted a pared down timeline that included my hopes for your dad;)
 

Spookdaddy

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I'm still confused about the difference between a premonition and a foreboding. My copy of Roget's thesaurus is no help! And my dictionary is no better!
It may just be the way I use them - but I always thought that foreboding denoted a more general and less defined sense of gathering unease, whereas premonition was much more precise in its focus.

So:

I have foreboding that something bad is going to happen on my way to Glasgow today.

I have a premonition that the train on which I am travelling will crash near Carlisle.
 
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