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Strange Strangers

The former Mr Snail had a conviction for 'Urinating in a Public Place', dating from about 1975. Cost him a £10 fine and an embarrassing conviction.*

He'd been on a lads' night out in Leicester and staggered up an alley for what he thought would be a discreet pee.

However, being a stranger to the area and drunk he found himself positioned next to the side exit of the building, which turned out to be a working men's club.

I used to remind him that he was lucky to be arrested and locked up rather than awarded a kicking by the Gentlemen Members.

*Years later he applied for a position in which this conviction would have been a big problem so he didn't want to disclose it on paper.
I suggested a way round it and he was successful, and the interviewers told him he had a very wise wife!

Did he carry on listening to me? Did he 'ell.


It never ceases to amaze me Escargot what decisions people make whilst under the influence.

That poor guy who went missing in Bury St Edmonds a few years back, decided it would be a good idea to sleep off his boozy night a dumpster. (RIP mate)

Anyway back on topic – few years back, I’m at work and notice that a crowd had gathered by one of the windows, with staff pointing and laughing at something out in the street. I walked over and there below was a obviously very drunk middle aged city guy, squatting in the kerb trying to take a dump. It was only about 4.30pm and broad daylight, how p!ssed does someone have to be..?

Someone must have called the Police, as soon, a City police car pulled up alongside, and 2 coppers threw him in the back and drove him off.
 
It never ceases to amaze me Escargot what decisions people make whilst under the influence.

That poor guy who went missing in Bury St Edmonds a few years back, decided it would be a good idea to sleep off his boozy night a dumpster. (RIP mate)

Anyway back on topic – few years back, I’m at work and notice that a crowd had gathered by one of the windows, with staff pointing and laughing at something out in the street. I walked over and there below was a obviously very drunk middle aged city guy, squatting in the kerb trying to take a dump. It was only about 4.30pm and broad daylight, how p!ssed does someone have to be..?

Someone must have called the Police, as soon, a City police car pulled up alongside, and 2 coppers threw him in the back and drove him off.

That's amazing. Many years ago a friend was on the tube in a carriage with maybe half a dozen other people, it was late-ish on a weekend night but nowhere near the last train. A woman in her early 20s got on, selected a seat, pulled her trousers down and did a wee. She then got up, rearranged her clothing and got off at the next stop, her behaviour seemed to indicate that, as far as she was concerned, she was in the ladies.
 
That's amazing. Many years ago a friend was on the tube in a carriage with maybe half a dozen other people, it was late-ish on a weekend night but nowhere near the last train. A woman in her early 20s got on, selected a seat, pulled her trousers down and did a wee. She then got up, rearranged her clothing and got off at the next stop, her behaviour seemed to indicate that, as far as she was concerned, she was in the ladies.


That made me laugh Ogdred, how can someone be so wasted to mistake 190 tonnes of steel for the ladies.

Those last trains home are pure theatre by the way. Once (I can’t remember why) I was forced to take the last train home sober – never ever again lol
 
That made me laugh Ogdred, how can someone be so wasted to mistake 190 tonnes of steel for the ladies.

Those last trains home are pure theatre by the way. Once (I can’t remember why) I was forced to take the last train home sober – never ever again lol

190 tonnes of moving steel. I've got the night tube home once or twice in the wee small hours, a very interesting experience.
 
The night bus from Glasgow to Cumbernald is terrifying. And not because anyone is overtly threatening or anything.


Someone should start a new thread - Where is the funniest or weirdest place you have woken up, after falling asleep on the last train or bus home.

Mine was on the top deck of a 38 bus, which had terminated at Leyton bus garage. It was 3am, I managed to find my way off the bus, but couldn’t get out of the garage as it was locked up for the night.

I had no option but to get back onto the bus and fall back to sleep – when I re woke up, I was going past Hackney Town Hall. lol
 
Someone should start a new thread - Where is the funniest or weirdest place you have woken up, after falling asleep on the last train or bus home.

Mine was on the top deck of a 38 bus, which had terminated at Leyton bus garage. It was 3am, I managed to find my way off the bus, but couldn’t get out of the garage as it was locked up for the night.

I had no option but to get back onto the bus and fall back to sleep – when I re woke up, I was going past Hackney Town Hall. lol

*sucks teeth* Ooh, that's poor procedure.

The driver is supposed to check for passengers, property etc before the bus goes to bed. They should also do a walk-round before taking a bus out, though the pre-driving check is often reduced to a quick glance at the lights and wheel pointers.
 
Someone should start a new thread - Where is the funniest or weirdest place you have woken up, after falling asleep on the last train or bus home.

Mine was on the top deck of a 38 bus, which had terminated at Leyton bus garage. It was 3am, I managed to find my way off the bus, but couldn’t get out of the garage as it was locked up for the night.

I had no option but to get back onto the bus and fall back to sleep – when I re woke up, I was going past Hackney Town Hall. lol

Leyton Bus Garage! - I've played them once or twice in a table tennis league. They're all bus drivers funnily enough. Decent players too - I managed to win a game or two but lost the matches.

Where were you aiming to get off that night? It'd be even funnier/more tragic if the bus was taking you back just in time for work the next day.
 
Just wondering who else must have an invisible tattoo on their forehead saying 'oddball magnet' or something. I must possess one of those faces that seem to unfortunately attract them from far and wide. Went out to the Karaoke night at our local last night and spent half my night fending off nut jobs and weirdos. I don't travel by bus these days but when I did they always used to chose to sit by or very near me. Have had completely 'strange strangers' trying to latch onto me or come up to me in the street. No matter how you try you can't get rid of them. However I am deploying a new tactic that seems to be working so far ( fingers crossed) which seems to thwart their approaches after a while. I also have developed a protection ruse from 'energy vampires' who can be a real problem. Would love to hear about your experiences of this and/or any theories/stories of 'strange strangers'.
Billy Connelly did an entire routine based on this
 
Leyton Bus Garage! - I've played them once or twice in a table tennis league. They're all bus drivers funnily enough. Decent players too - I managed to win a game or two but lost the matches.

Where were you aiming to get off that night? It'd be even funnier/more tragic if the bus was taking you back just in time for work the next day.

Morning Hunck.

No idea how I ended up in Leyton, I have no recollection of even getting on a 38 bus that night, and yes as I was a young postman at the time, I went straight to work without going home.

That means I left for work on Friday morning at 5am & and didn’t get home until late Saturday afternoon.

My poor old Mum went spare, I was only 17 at the time.

Ahhh, the folly of youth lol
 
Morning Hunck.

No idea how I ended up in Leyton, I have no recollection of even getting on a 38 bus that night, and yes as I was a young postman at the time, I went straight to work without going home.

That means I left for work on Friday morning at 5am & and didn’t get home until late Saturday afternoon.

My poor old Mum went spare, I was only 17 at the time.

Ahhh, the folly of youth lol

Ha ha. So a completely random bus then..
 
Somewhere in the Netherlands about 25 years ago me and a mate didn't understand the Dutch announcement so stayed on the train. We ended up in the sidings before it had to reverse back to let us off on the platform.

Also years ago a mate fell asleep on the toilet in The Alex (an 'alternative rock' nightclub in Lancaster). He woke up to find the place in total darkness. He felt his way to the stairs, crept downstairs and prepared himself to open the fire door (thereby setting the alarms off). He did and ran like the clappers.

The same bloke, also years ago, was walking his Staffy puppy near Lancaster castle. The lead slipped from his hand and the puppy legged it...straight into the Priory and the straight up the centre aisle, followed by said mate. This would have been OK, but was made worse by the fact that a wedding was taking place and the couple were at the altar as he careered down the aisle after his dog.
 
The former Mr Snail had a conviction for 'Urinating in a Public Place', dating from about 1975. Cost him a £10 fine and an embarrassing conviction.*

He'd been on a lads' night out in Leicester and staggered up an alley for what he thought would be a discreet pee.

Talking about unwise pissing places thought this little tale might amuse you it even has a passing reference to things Fortean.

My ex used to have a paper round, as in getting up in in the wee ( ;) ) small hours to take the daily newspapers round to all the little shops in our very rural area. It was divided up into several runs and one of them was known as the 'pussycat run' on account of many reported sightings of big cats over the years. This was fairly remote and a pain to do as it took so long ... well at least this is why the drivers said they didn't like doing it!

This particular night ex was bursting to go so stopped the van and hopped out and got behind a gorse bush (just on the off chance that another vehicle could be coming along).

Oh the relief but had only just started the flow when he was scared out of his wits to near heart attack by a loud animal noise and the movement of a puma sized animal rearing up just feet from where he was standing ... he was about to relieve himself all over it!!!!!

YIKES! YIKES MEGA YIKES!

Never managed to get back in the van so quickly heart pounding away thinking he'd never laugh off those big cat stories again.

Then from the safety of the van he realised it had only been a sheep!!!

Relief that he wasn't about to be attacked by a big cat turned to dismay when he thought of how it could have worked out. If he'd had a fatal heart attack and been found the next morning on top of a sheep with his willy out ........... ha! ha! Well it was in deep in the heart of rural Wales.

Sollywos x
 
I have always been a magnet for people who live outside traditional norms of society and can honestly say I've heard some strange stories over the years. One conversation with a total stranger however, will stay with me till the day I die. A few years ago, I was out with some friends on a Saturday night enjoying a couple of shandies and whilst waiting patiently at the bar to be served, the youngish bloke next to me struck up a conversation which very quickly took a bizarre turn. He began to tell me that he thought he was going mad because what had happened to him was so incredibly out there that nobody EVER believed him and he said he'd even begun to doubt his own memories. He then told me that he had been abroad travelling to different countries for many years, diftiifting from casual job to casual job until he met an Australian girl and fell in love. This led him to go back to Oz when she returned home and he moved into her parents home in the isolated, small village where she grew up. Life apparently was good, he found local work as a farm hand and he'd began to make plans to marry and to live there permanently. All was fine and dandy till apparently he had to go to the city for a few days and upon his return his whole life fell apart and a nightmare began. He said that everyone had simply gone from the village, there were no people, no animals, nothing. He said he stayed for days waiting for his girlfriend to come home but she never did. All belongings were still in the house and as he searched the village he realised it looked as though everyone had just literally vanished from the face of the earth. One other thing he said was as he walked round he realised that the graves in the churchyard had been excavated and the remains removed too. He called the police but they weren't interested in what he was telling them. Eventually he decided to get a flight home to the UK as he felt the need to feel connected again.
At this point I noticed that this fella looked traumatised and I fully believe that he'd lived through something horrific, he wasn't pissed (drunk) and as he talked to me he was crying and emotional. I know that I haven't done his story any justice and it probably sounds like a work of fiction and indeed, none of my friends that night believed what I'd told them but in that moment when I was talking with him, I instinctively knew he was telling me the truth. The poor man was heartbroken.
Or he was an actor of such greatness and magnitude and I am totally gullible! Although, i still can't figure out a motive for fabricating such a wild story? He asked me foe nothing and despite looking for him (to tell his story to my disbelieving friends) I never saw him again, he disappeared....
 
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I have always been a magnet for people who live outside traditional norms of society and can honestly say I've heard some strange stories over the years. One conversation with a total stranger however, will stay with me till the day I die. A few years ago, I was out with some friends on a Saturday night enjoying a couple of shandies and whilst waiting patiently at the bar to be served, the youngish bloke next to me struck up a conversation which very quickly took a bizarre turn. He began to tell me that he thought he was going mad because what had happened to him was so incredibly out there that nobody EVER believed him and he said he'd even begun to doubt his own memories. He then told me that he had been abroad travelling to different countries for many years, diftiifting from casual job to casual job until he met an Australian girl and fell in love. This led him to go back to Oz when she returned home and he moved into her parents home in the isolated, small village where she grew up. Life apparently was good, he found local work as a farm hand and he'd began to make plans to marry and to live there permanently. All was fine and dandy till apparently he had to go to the city for a few days and upon his return his whole life fell apart and a nightmare began. He said that everyone had simply gone from the village, there were no people, no animals, nothing. He said he stayed for days waiting for his girlfriend to come home but she never did. All belongings were still in the house and as he searched the village he realised it looked as though everyone had just literally vanished from the face of the earth. One other thing he said was as he walked round he realised that the graves in the churchyard had been excavated and the remains removed too. He called the police but they weren't interested in what he was telling them. Eventually he decided to get a flight home to the UK as he felt the need to feel connected again.
At this point I noticed that this fella looked traumatised and I fully believe that he'd lived through something horrific, he wasn't pissed (drunk) and as he talked to me he was crying and emotional. I know that I haven't done his story any justice and it probably sounds like a work of fiction and indeed, none of my friends that night believed what I'd told them but in that moment when I was talking with him, I instinctively knew he was telling me the truth. The poor man was heartbroken.
Or he was an actor of such greatness and magnitude and I am totally gullible! Although, i still can't figure out a motive for fabricating such a wild story? He asked me foe nothing and despite looking for him (to tell his story to my disbelieving friends) I never saw him again, he disappeared....
There are many factors that make this story unbelievable as something that really happened, such as that he'd lived in a small village long enough to know people and "one" (few) days he left the village to return and find it gone. He may believe it, but I would think that he may be schizophrenic and delusional. His feelings of loss would be real to him, but I would be worried about his mental health and hope that he is getting help.

I am not a professional, but have a couple of friends who have schizophrenia, but are in good health currently.
 
There are many factors that make this story unbelievable as something that really happened, such as that he'd lived in a small village long enough to know people and "one" (few) days he left the village to return and find it gone. He may believe it, but I would think that he may be schizophrenic and delusional. His feelings of loss would be real to him, but I would be worried about his mental health and hope that he is getting help.
Brownmane The way he explained about what he said he had been through was far more detailed and descriptive than I have recalled here. I remember too that he did mention the name and location of the town which, unfortunately I don't remember. He was extremely convincing and genuine. I have often wondered if he did have a mental health issue that wasn't being successfully managed at that time. He definitely believed that he had experienced something truly horrific and whatever it was had left its mark deeply upon him.
 
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