The Handy Tips Thread

[feinman]

Tip: Tip! And be nice to food service workers... The urban legends about the terrible stuff those employees do in the kitchen to jerky customers' food, Are TRUE.

 

[Swifty]

I've just remembered a good one ..

We had a waitress somewhere I worked called Thelma. Thelma was in her mid 70's and was hard to understand because she spoke in pure North Norfolk with the occasional swear word for good measure ..

I was the cook there and our manager called me over one day. He was smiling and he said:

"I've just had to rescue Thelma, she's just told a customer to fuck off."
"Shit. That's instant dismissal?"
"I know .. that woman called me over and complained about her"
"What did you do?"
"Don't say anything because Thelma doesn't know but I've said she's a care in the community placement and apologised to the woman."
"*laughing* .. what did the woman say?"
"She kept apologising to me instead and said it was wonderful what we were doing."

.. and that was the day Steve saved Thelma from getting the sack.

 

[Analogue Boy]

I wouldn’t know anything about that.

 

[Comfortably Numb]

I'm told there are phone apps to control TVs etc. That'd be fun!

There are...

...and they are not.

Especially when you have spent ages settling one up, point it towards the TV, nothing happens, you try repeatedly and subsequently catch the point your mobile phone doesn't have infrared...

 

[Comfortably Numb]

I wouldn’t know anything about that.

 

[Comfortably Numb]

I spend almost all of my time by myself (though with my dog) and really enjoy it...

Without the dog it could become somewhat depressing, these days.

Right then, you need an uplifting injection of something I often watch, even if in the background!

There are several related videos and whilst ostensibly self explanatory, way more involved.

Aside from, 'wildlife enthusiast camper with his dog on long stay winter adventure'... some of the inherently filmed background - lakes like a flat mirror, sunrises and sunsets to behold, unspoilt scenery - is breathtaking.

Overall, perhaps just a reminder there is a world away from our troubles and when circumstances become more akin to normality, often a world of nature not that far away from where we live.

https://youtube.com/c/MatthewPosa

This one's a good start!

Winter Camping with My Dog

[Edit: swapped the links for something even better!]

 

[Stormkhan]

Why get "all your remote control devices into one" when it just means that one can be broken, lost, chewed by dogs?
Why brag to me when you say "From this smartphone, I work from home, I control my energy efficiency and exercise regime, I find out from my'fridge what needs to be bought, when my children's birthdays are, I can access my bank and pay for things, I can search for street directions, I can see what weather conditions are not only happening now but will happen (probably), I can translate phrases from English to a foreign language and vice versa and I can find the train times from Dusseldorf to Dortmund" ... and all I need to do is snatch the 'phone from your hand and stamp hard on it? Need a 'phone to contact a copper or your lawyer for what I've done? Ooops. Can you remember your lawyers number or was it on your ... 'phone?
Seriously, I'm in awe and appreciate the scientific gadgets we have these days.
But if you put everything into one thing then you are increasing the vulnerability of everything?

 

[Comfortably Numb]

But if you put everything into one thing then you are increasing the vulnerability of everything?

You mean, what if it breaks!?

 

[Mythopoeika]

Why get "all your remote control devices into one" when it just means that one can be broken, lost, chewed by dogs?
Why brag to me when you say "From this smartphone, I work from home, I control my energy efficiency and exercise regime, I find out from my'fridge what needs to be bought, when my children's birthdays are, I can access my bank and pay for things, I can search for street directions, I can see what weather conditions are not only happening now but will happen (probably), I can translate phrases from English to a foreign language and vice versa and I can find the train times from Dusseldorf to Dortmund" ... and all I need to do is snatch the 'phone from your hand and stamp hard on it? Need a 'phone to contact a copper or your lawyer for what I've done? Ooops. Can you remember your lawyers number or was it on your ... 'phone?
Seriously, I'm in awe and appreciate the scientific gadgets we have these days.
But if you put everything into one thing then you are increasing the vulnerability of everything?

Wise words.

 

[EnolaGaia]

Single point convenience always entails the opportunity for single point failure.

 

[Comfortably Numb]

Single point convenience always entails the opportunity for single point failure.

For a moment there, I thought that was a quote from Charles Fort...

 

[Comfortably Numb]

And so it goes...

Especially here quite often.

Inspired by the above, I ventured forth to try something on the 'large screen 1080p smart TV', which is now over two years old.

Can it actually download an app?

Five minutes later and somehow...

VEVO is now on my TV and you can...

...search as well...

Explicit versions included...



Are you kidding!!!

'B-L-O-O-D-H-OUND G-A-N-...

[Edit: See 'What Music' thread ]

 

[Swifty]

For a moment there, I thought that was a quote from Charles Fort...

It's a quote from John Holmes. Probably.

 

[escargot]

Why get "all your remote control devices into one" when it just means that one can be broken, lost, chewed by dogs?
Why brag to me when you say "From this smartphone, I work from home, I control my energy efficiency and exercise regime, I find out from my'fridge what needs to be bought, when my children's birthdays are, I can access my bank and pay for things, I can search for street directions, I can see what weather conditions are not only happening now but will happen (probably), I can translate phrases from English to a foreign language and vice versa and I can find the train times from Dusseldorf to Dortmund" ... and all I need to do is snatch the 'phone from your hand and stamp hard on it? Need a 'phone to contact a copper or your lawyer for what I've done? Ooops. Can you remember your lawyers number or was it on your ... 'phone?
Seriously, I'm in awe and appreciate the scientific gadgets we have these days.
But if you put everything into one thing then you are increasing the vulnerability of everything?

Most people back up their smartphones' data etc so they can retrieve it if necessary.

 

[escargot]

I'm convinced. Dumping the smartphone and going back to basics.

 

[escargot]

If serving the public is your job, size the customer up as soon as they step into the room. If the first thing they do is either look up at the ceiling or study the corners of the room, they are going to be a pain in the arse so step backwards and pretend you suddenly need to go to the staff toilet and thus cruelly leaving the rookie staff member to deal with the high maintenance bullshit certainly coming. 'They' almost always look at the ceiling or the corners of the room first, I don't know why. A solid tip from uncle Swifty.

Reminds me of the Orson Welles interview where he describes how well hotel reception staff learn to weigh up approaching guests.

 

[catseye]

If you have a job working with the public, you can tend to value your solitude. I spend almost all of my time by myself (though with my dog) and really enjoy it. Without the dog it could become somewhat depressing, these days. The dog permits me the long hours alone necessary to create visual art, without the compromises necessary to keep a human. Unless you have a proper holding container! "It rubs the lotion on..." I used to be a very social party animal type, but am enjoying my existence better these days.

I am exactly the same!

Used to be the most social person going - since I started working in the shop I LOVE my downtime at home, just me and the dog. I have no idea how people in couples or with families do it - talking small talk and chat to customers all day and then going home and having to answer bloody daft questions about the location of socks or whether there's anything for tea...

Sometimes on a long stretch off, I don't talk to a human for DAYS! It's bliss.

And Swifty, you don't get the chance to dump difficult customers on a noob when you are the only person on the till, not due a break for two hours and there's only two other people working in the whole shop!

 

[Swifty]

I am exactly the same!

Used to be the most social person going - since I started working in the shop I LOVE my downtime at home, just me and the dog. I have no idea how people in couples or with families do it - talking small talk and chat to customers all day and then going home and having to answer bloody daft questions about the location of socks or whether there's anything for tea...

Sometimes on a long stretch off, I don't talk to a human for DAYS! It's bliss.

And Swifty, you don't get the chance to dump difficult customers on a noob when you are the only person on the till, not due a break for two hours and there's only two other people working in the whole shop!

Yeah but you love it.

 

[catseye]

Yeah but you love it.

I really do! I'm sitting here under the warmth of my duvet, listening to my neighbour shovelling snow like we live in Colorado (there's about 1/4 inch of snow out there) with the dog on my feet and nobody talking to me! And then I will go to work and have seven hours of the same conversation about the snow over and over and over and then directing people to the beans.

I wonder if there's a job going as a hermit anywhere?

 

[David Plankton]

This is how you interact with customers -

 

[feinman]

I really do! I'm sitting here under the warmth of my duvet, listening to my neighbour shovelling snow like we live in Colorado (there's about 1/4 inch of snow out there) with the dog on my feet and nobody talking to me! And then I will go to work and have seven hours of the same conversation about the snow over and over and over and then directing people to the beans.

I wonder if there's a job going as a hermit anywhere?

A lot of people are alone these days, but the poor bastards just don't enjoy it!
It does help to have a choice to be alone though; a luxury many can't afford. One day I will be the last person in my family alive, and I'll be alone without a choice; we'll see how it goes then!

 

[Stormkhan]

I have no idea how people in couples or with families do it - talking small talk and chat to customers all day and then going home and having to answer bloody daft questions about the location of socks or whether there's anything for tea...

There's only me and my wife who works in our business, a shop. We have divided up the various tasks and 'departments' between us, which leads to some quietly funny dialogue with spam sales calls but it means that if an issue turns up, there's only one person dealing with it and not two who may work at cross-purposes. This said, we're both capable - at a pinch - to perform the others roles in the case of emergency.
We have a policy of keeping work at work. We can chat, mind, about personal things at work ... but once we get home, we switch off. We value our privacy. It's possible, again, to chat about work at home; t'missus might get a notification of an email coming in to our work system, read it, then we talk about it ... briefly. The recognised response is "I'll deal with it when I get in to work tomorrow."
When it comes to small talk and chat, we do it many times in the day. But it's social interaction between ourselves. At home, we have our own interests, hobbies, things we like to watch on TV. We give each other 'mental' space.
I guess we have it easy because the system we have is after just under 11 years of being in business together and we haven't ended up strangling each other, the children, the relatives of a customer.
Yet.

 

[EnolaGaia]

Single point convenience always entails the opportunity for single point failure.

For a moment there, I thought that was a quote from Charles Fort...

It's a quote from John Holmes. Probably.

For the record ... No, it's not a quote from someone else - it's mine. It's a maxim (with variant phrasings) I've used many times during my working life to caution folks that a design that incorporates everything in one seemingly convenient 'bag' turns all too inconvenient when a single problem negates the entire system's functionality.

A Swiss Army Knife or multi-tool is a great thing .... Until you lose it ...

 

[David Plankton]

For the record ... No, it's not a quote from someone else - it's mine. It's a maxim (with variant phrasings) I've used many times during my working life to caution folks that a design that incorporates everything in one seemingly convenient 'bag' turns all too inconvenient when a single problem negates the entire system's functionality.

A Swiss Army Knife or multi-tool is a great thing .... Until you lose it ...

I encountered a travelling salesman once who was offering wallets with phone pouch combined. Yes, you could lose your credit cards and your phone at the same time.
Now if only he had put a key-ring on it..

 

[Shady]

This is how you interact with customers -

WTF is that slab of black stuff ?, looks like a bit fell off of the sculpture that Roy made in Close Encounters of the Third Kind, yuk

 

[gordonrutter]

There's only me and my wife who works in our business, a shop. We have divided up the various tasks and 'departments' between us, which leads to some quietly funny dialogue with spam sales calls but it means that if an issue turns up, there's only one person dealing with it and not two who may work at cross-purposes. This said, we're both capable - at a pinch - to perform the others roles in the case of emergency.
We have a policy of keeping work at work. We can chat, mind, about personal things at work ... but once we get home, we switch off. We value our privacy. It's possible, again, to chat about work at home; t'missus might get a notification of an email coming in to our work system, read it, then we talk about it ... briefly. The recognised response is "I'll deal with it when I get in to work tomorrow."
When it comes to small talk and chat, we do it many times in the day. But it's social interaction between ourselves. At home, we have our own interests, hobbies, things we like to watch on TV. We give each other 'mental' space.
I guess we have it easy because the system we have is after just under 11 years of being in business together and we haven't ended up strangling each other, the children, the relatives of a customer.
Yet.

Those “guess what that idiot I work with did” conversations must be awkward?

 

[escargot]

I encountered a travelling salesman once who was offering wallets with phone pouch combined. Yes, you could lose your credit cards and your phone at the same time.
Now if only he had put a key-ring on it..

As women's clothes generally don't have pockets we are forced to carry our phones some other way. Inventors are always trying to sell us combined purses/phone cases. Everything gets shoved in a handbag instead.

 

[Shady]

Maybe we could use a bobble hat to put a phone in, sure they could fit a pocket on there somewhere, or a sock or stocking phone

 

[Stormkhan]

WTF is that slab of black stuff ?, looks like a bit fell off of the sculpture that Roy made in Close Encounters of the Third Kind, yuk

I'd hazard a guess as industrial sized boiled brisket?
Reminds me of a time decades back when my brother had a temp job working in a kebab shop. He managed to persuade my younger (teenage) sister that the blocks of compressed lamb meat they put on the rotisserie was, in fact a whole sheep. According to him ( ) they had a big machine"out the back" which took a whole sheep, skinned it, and sort of gutted it like an apple corer. Took a while to persuade her this was a joke and longer to get her to eat a kebab again.

 

[EnolaGaia]

WTF is that slab of black stuff ?, looks like a bit fell off of the sculpture that Roy made in Close Encounters of the Third Kind, yuk

It's a big hunk of roast beef. For reasons I never quite fathomed it became popular for buffet-style eateries to have an attendant slice off roast beef on demand and serve it to customers passing through the buffet line. I never figured out whether this became common practice to keep the meat juicy or just to make the presentation / service seem more up-scale.