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The Mongol Rally: Prague To Ulan Ude In An Old Banger

Yithian

Parish Watch
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East of Suez
I think that as the promoters would be glad of additional promotion, I'm probabably safe in copying a chunk of their text here. This is truly an odessey, and a highly eccentric one at that (your car: 'the shittier the better').

I love it. It reminds me of A Short Walk In The Hindu Kush.

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The Greatest Motoring Adventure on the Planet
A third of the way around the planet in a vehicle only fit for the scrap heap
01.The Rules
We quake at the thought of clipboards and officious, stern faced folk telling us how to wipe our arses. But we do have three simple Rally rules and they ain’t rocket science. Read on and kneel at the altar of chaos.
Rule 1. You can only take a farcically small vehicle of 1 litre or less
(we will allow up to a 1.2 if you’re a bit weak)
Rule 2. You’re completely on your own
Rule 3. You've got to raise £1000 for charity
Rule 1: Small and shit
You can take any car, as long as it’s crap and with an engine of 1.2 litre or less. Ideally under 1 litre. For motorbikes we've generously allowed 125cc, but would prefer it to be a scooter.
You need to drive a small, shit car to make the rally tougher. It's no fun if it's too easy. If you want easy go for a spa weekend. If you want to make it harder, take a small bike.
With a small car or bike, you're more likely to break down so you're more likely to interact with the locals, so you can remind yourself you're alive without jamming a fork into your eyeballs.
Rule 2: You're on your own
We could tell you everything you need to know about all the countries, roads and borders between here and Russia to ensure you have a safe, uncomplicated journey. But if it's not dangerous and you aren't lost, you're not on an adventure. That means no on the road backup or support. If you get stuck or in trouble, you need to solve the problem yourself. Any ‘Help! We’re broken down in Tajikistan,’ type phone calls to Rally HQ will be met with a snort of derision and a click of the receiver.
Rule 3: Raise £1000 for charity
It only seems fair that if you’re having the mother of all adventures you should give a little back, so we ask teams on the Rally to raise a minimum of £1000 for charity. £500 of this must go to our official charity Cool Earth. The other £500 can be donated to a charity of your choice.
Just one more thing:
Oh, and on another dull but vital note - you absolutely have to be 18 or over to sign the entry agreement on our adventures. If you try to sign up before 18 we get in a lot of trouble and we have to send someone around to kidnap your parents & rough them up a bit.
02.Vehicles
Any old dullard can purchase a 4x4 that could easily make it across the surface of the moon and drive a quarter of the world’s circumference, and that, is exactly what the Mongol Rally is not about.
It’s about small. It’s about stupid. It’s about unsuitability. It’s about humour.
We have purposely set the bar for engine size to a mere 1 Litre - or 1000cc. We shall allow up to a 1.2 for those of you who can’t handle a whole litre of courage, but anything over this and you’ll have to contact us directly and pitch your ideas to us very carefully. We shall allow larger engines if we think it’s unsuitable and ridiculous enough.
Want to prove your nuts are akin to a palm tree? Then maybe you want to consider tackling the Rally on a motorbike. Ideally, this should be under 125cc. Again, for anything over this please check with us first. We’re slightly more lenient with bikes, because driving 10,000 miles on a bike is badass enough, but you’re not going to be looked upon kindly by your fellow Ralliers if you turn up on a massive, utterly suitable touring bike.
Take your crap home with you
We no longer import vehicles to Mongolia. Nor will they scrap your car, neither will Russia. Unless you want to pay hefty (the wrong side of $6000 dollar sort of hefty) import fees. Yes, you even have to pay import fees to scrap the car. No, you can't sell it. Nor can you give it to anyone. When you enter the country in a car you get a little stamp in your passport, if you leave with the stamp, but no car, you'll have to pay the tax.
All vehicles must be driven or shipped back to whence they came. We have negotiated massive group discounts with a local freight company to assist with this, but you need to budget for the time or money to get your vehicle home.
03.The Unroute
We believe the world is far too safe and organised, that we’ve come to live in ever decreasing circles of freedom. Fear of litigation, greed and a spineless refusal to take responsibility for ourselves have robbed us of one of the most interesting things in life: the unexpected.
The un-route rails against this. It forces you to be lost, to not know what’s around the next corner, to embrace the unknown.
It’s brilliantly simple. We give you a start point and a finish point but where you go or what you do in between is entirely your steaming bag of adventuring magic. We recommend that you don’t spend too long planning your route or poring over useful maps or guidebooks. Find out what’s there when you arrive. Unleash the unexpected.
In the past teams have travelled as far south as Iran and Pakistan. Others have ventured into the Arctic Circle. Why not break the mould and go via the Congo or the North Pole?
More (amusing) rules and (good) photographs (section 09 is rather sobering):
 
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I used to work with a guy who did that kind of thing. He'd buy a scrapper and get it roadworthy (just), then he'd cross-country rally it with some mates.
 
This is wonderful!!!!!!!!!

more!
 
One of my former housemates took part in this last year. Have no idea how they went on (I moved out before the event) but I know their banger was a Ford Capri :fnord:


I can't remember the last time I saw a fnord ;)
 
Sounds ace! I'd do it if I wasn't so cripped. Top tip for the rallyers: after you finish, go south to Nepal and 'donate' the car there to the government if you can. For some reason the authorities whack such a huge import tax on new cars (300% - total troughing and bakhsheesh) that a new 1.0L Suzuki costs the best part of £20,000.
 
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Fantastic☺ can i enter with this?
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It would soon become a banger...

I love it. It reminds me of A Short Walk In The Hindu Kush.

I only fairly recently read that book thinking it would be stereotypical British chaps doing spiffing thinks, while 'the boy' fetches some tea.

Complete opposite. Bumbling brits abroad, no clue and very funny.
 
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