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The Strangest Thing You've Woken Up With

I recall procuring a lot of traffic cones from outside the museum that is in the same building as the pitt rivers museum, and putting them across the road - we then watched chaos not ensue. aww
 
Faggus said:
I recall procuring a lot of traffic cones from outside the museum that is in the same building as the pitt rivers museum, and putting them across the road - we then watched chaos not ensue. aww

Is that the geology museum ? I love those two museums ! Have to go back one day .
 
It's the (unfinished) victorian gothic facade one - full of dinosaurs and rocks 'n' stuff. I like the ashmolean
 
Faggus said:
It's the (unfinished) victorian gothic facade one - full of dinosaurs and rocks 'n' stuff. I like the ashmolean

Thats good too - all worth going to ! The Ashmolean was on tv earlier - a programme moaning about the fact they have 'our' ( Somerset's ) Alfred jewel and don't seem to care about it much .
 
a programme moaning about the fact they have 'our' ( Somerset's ) Alfred jewel and don't seem to care about it much .
I went to the Ashmolean, years ago, especially to see it. A lovely piece of workmanship.
"AELFRED MEC HEHT GEWYRCAN",
 
I visited Alias Ashmoles grave and John Tradescants museum of curiosities only to discover that it is a museum of gardening and as such contains many trowels and spades (eep!)

The church itself (for that is where the museum is) is more intriguing and contains, in its burial ground Captain Bligh! (of the bounty)

The museum still has the Vegetable lamb of Tartary or Baphomet as it was called when it was part of "Tradescants Ark"

The rest, as far as I know was moved to the Ashmolean.
 
The strangest thing I ever woke up with was my last boyfriend. He was an over-the-top conspiracy theorist - wouldn't put his garbage out in front of his own house lest they find out all his secrets (not that he had any....), or give blood, lest it be used in medical experiments.

He also liked to repeat sexist and off-color furnace-repair mnemonics over and over again, which really got on my nerves after a while....

Nonny
 
And the truly tragic thing is that guys like that still get laid more than I do! :eek!!!!:
 
Adrian Veidt said:
He may well have been still alive quicksilver. I had a weather loach who made a habit of escaping his tank. So much so that he was christened harry, after the great houdini. Many was the time I'd find him dried out and apparently lifeless, but just popped him back in the tank and within a few seconds he would be swimming around right as rain.

Ulp! That makes me feel a whole lot better about it, thanks Adrian! :D
 
Had a most distressed patient this morning who woke up with a leg.


Used to have two............................
 
I lived with a recently graduated pharmacist a couple of years ago and she had serious case of alcohol-induced kleptomania, the best one I remember was her stealing a chandelier from a restaurant. Her and a few friends once cleared out about 20 chairs from a McDonalds one night too, not sure what happened to the chairs though - I think they were abandoned in Oxford Street somewhere...

One of my housemates at University once rolled up post-pub with a kebab in one hand and, somehow, three-quarters of a leather sofa and a large wooden cable reel in the other.

Personally I most remember the time a friend of mine and I woke up at his house after a night on some very lethal spirits to find we had removed all the signs saying "Welcome to <small English village>" from around the outskirts of our village and brought them to his house. Unable to think of what to do with them and scared of them being found we threw them in a canal...
The local council was quite mystified, as were we when we retraced the route we had probably taken. It was very long and some of the signs must have been very hard to reach!

:rolleyes:
 
I once woke up at a festival with horrfic wounds on my palms. My first thought, was "bloody hell, it's stigmata".

Later the real explanation came to light. It involved vodka, needing a pee, and barbed wire. Ah well.
 
Er . . . a headless pigeon?! :cross eye ( breakfast - courtesy of the cats )
 
Inverurie Jones said:
What kind of award are we on about, here???
I don't know IJ. I hadn't thought it through ok? My "humour" doesn't stand up to this kind of scrutiny. :(
 
Why are traffic cones so attractive to drunken students? When I'm drunk I try to explain to anyone within earshot the theory of relativity until I collapse in a heap on the floor.
 
Confession Time

A friend who had a snooker table in his house lived near a golf course and after a few beers and a few frames we used to go for a walk to sober up. I kind of remember taking some of the following which I tended to wake up with on his sofa. These were not aquired on the same night but over the period of a year or so. they are in the order I remember tham in but cant be 100% sure as it was about 10 years ago.

Golf Club Car Park Entry sign
Golf Club Car Park Exit sign
Keep off the Grass Sign.
The white plastic chain from around a flower bed.
A TV aerial (I needed a bunk-up for that one)
2 empty beer barrels :rolleyes: (I woke on the floor as barrels were on sofa)
discharged shotgun cartridge :confused:
A headless Garden Gnome with the name 'Igor' written in marker pen.
A B&Q carrier bag with a dead seagull in it :eek:
Poleroids of a cat, my forehead and someones letter box.
Various traffic cones (obiously)

I think that is about it
 
I’ll accept your bump....

No alcohol involved for a change..........I woke up one Sunday morning and in my still sleepy, befuddled, not fully with it, state realised that I was in bed with a fully naked, dark skinned woman, with vivid purple hair, who smelled slightly of digestive biscuits!

Seeing as I was married to a white skinned redhead, I was slightly perturbed by what the bloody hell had occurred the night before........Then it came back to me.....Mrs Girth had insisted that I help her with her fake tan and radical hair colouring session some hours earlier.......neither of which turned out quite as advertised!
Panic over........although she couldn’t leave the house for ages afterwards.....the fake tan was absolutely dreadful but at least I hadn’t tapped off with an alien!!
 
Me and the Mrs once woke up with my old flat mate curled up asleep at the end of our bed. He meant nothing weird by it, he just used to hang out with us a lot so that just felt normal to him and us at the time because we were all good mates and he was drunk so it just involved me giving a gentle whisper of "Dan? ..Dan .. you can't sleep here mate because me and ****** are trying to sleep. Go to your own bedroom mate" and off he popped :) .. another time he fell asleep in the living room so me and the Mrs shaved Maori design patterns in his leg hair for fun. Another time he fell asleep in our living room, I licked two cigarette papers and stuck them to his knees then lit them with a cigarette lighter .. he woke up instantly, jumped up and started slapping his knees but was such a legend he laughed straight away. We're still all mates :).
 
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No alcohol involved for a change..........I woke up one Sunday morning and in my still sleepy, befuddled, not fully with it, state realised that I was in bed with a fully naked, dark skinned woman, with vivid purple hair, who smelled slightly of digestive biscuits!

Was that the inspiration for your Avatar ?
(no disrespect meant)
 
LOL.......no, she didn’t look quite that bad! We never did go down the fake tan path ever again though.....she’ll just have to remain un-tanned and ginger....as nature intended her to be!
 
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