Things That Make You Go... WTF?

Austin Popper

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We have been having all sorts of problems with deliveries this year. Lately, UPS in particular seems utterly clueless, with idiotic excuses and generally poor service. They used to be on the ball, but not any more. I was even told over the phone that there was "no such person" as the owner of the building they couldn't seem to find. Oh? And just how was that determined? The building is downtown, across the street from the fire station. A block from the only stoplight. It has had the same address for 129 years. I checked. Google maps puts a little red bubble in the center of the roof if you consult it. Amazing.
 

Shady

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I'm not a happy bunny .. some prick of a delivery driver has just hammered the f--k out of my front door until I answered to receive something the Mrs has ordered .. and I mean hammered the f--k. I was deciding if I should chin him or not but he looked at me half naked then dashed off without asking me to sign his digi pad.

DING DONG SLAM SLAM SLAM .. DING DONG SLAM SLAM SLAM .. DING DONG SLAM SLAM SLAM all within the time frame of only about ten seconds. The only time someone should ever do that is during a genuine emergency .. prick

.. and I had a member of staff who I had to look after this morning because I found her on the floor with her legs shaking. She's lovely but she's an alcoholic in recovery. ffs
Maybe so they can claim they really did knock on your door and ring the doorbell, so people cant say that they didnt hear them.
Jeez Swifty, have you ever considered going back into nursing?
 

Bigphoot2

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I'm not a happy bunny .. some prick of a delivery driver has just hammered the f--k out of my front door until I answered to receive something the Mrs has ordered .. and I mean hammered the f--k. I was deciding if I should chin him or not but he looked at me half naked then dashed off without asking me to sign his digi pad.

DING DONG SLAM SLAM SLAM .. DING DONG SLAM SLAM SLAM .. DING DONG SLAM SLAM SLAM all within the time frame of only about ten seconds. The only time someone should ever do that is during a genuine emergency .. prick

.. and I had a member of staff who I had to look after this morning because I found her on the floor with her legs shaking. She's lovely but she's an alcoholic in recovery. ffs
I had the opposite - a stealth delivery man in an invisible van who claimed he was unable to deliver a package as I was out. Yes, I was technically out - I was outside standing at my front door with a clear view of the street and chatting to a neighbour when a text arrived to say they had tried to deliver it but I wasn't in.
 

Mythopoeika

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I had the opposite - a stealth delivery man in an invisible van who claimed he was unable to deliver a package as I was out. Yes, I was technically out - I was outside standing at my front door with a clear view of the street and chatting to a neighbour when a text arrived to say they had tried to deliver it but I wasn't in.
It's your fault - you should have been wearing night vision specs.
 

Tribble

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I had the opposite - a stealth delivery man in an invisible van who claimed he was unable to deliver a package as I was out. Yes, I was technically out - I was outside standing at my front door with a clear view of the street and chatting to a neighbour when a text arrived to say they had tried to deliver it but I wasn't in.

 

maximus otter

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I just saw a Chinese tourist in county town wearing one of those “Chi-lish” items; a jacket with the logo “Acne Inc.”

Must try harder.

maximus otter
 

JamesWhitehead

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Was it Acne Inc or Acne Studios? The latter is a well-known, quite up-market, youth-oriented fashion brand, based in Stockholm! Their models are pale and wasted-looking stick-insects and look as if they could do with a good dose of testosterone*. :actw:

*Since afflicted folk would be very unlikley to want to wear this label, the brand may be guilty of cultural appropriation!
 
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maximus otter

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Was it Acne Inc or Acne Studios? The latter is a well-known, quite up-market fashion brand, based in Stockholm! Their models are pale and wasted-looking stick-insects and look as if they could do with a good dose of testosterone. :actw:
You’ve got me thinking now...

Also: what if Acne teamed up with Fat Face? Surely such a fashion house would carry all before it.

maximus otter
 
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Only a loon ...

A company has answered the question of 'what would Jesus wear?' by creating a pair of $3,000 (£2,451) holy shoes.

Dubbed the 'Jesus Shoes', the Nike tick emblazoned sneakers have holy water in the soles. When they hit the shelves on Tuesday morning they sold out in a matter of minutes. It is not clear whether early buyers were willing to fork out an average month's salary because of the shoe's 100% frankincense wool make-up or the crucifix tied on to the shoe laces.

Possibly they were drawn in by the Matthew 14:25 quote on the jesus.shoes websites suggesting wearers would be able to walk on water.

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/us-news/nike-jesus-shoes-costing-2400-20550064
 

escargot

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Only a loon ...

A company has answered the question of 'what would Jesus wear?' by creating a pair of $3,000 (£2,451) holy shoes.

Dubbed the 'Jesus Shoes', the Nike tick emblazoned sneakers have holy water in the soles. When they hit the shelves on Tuesday morning they sold out in a matter of minutes. It is not clear whether early buyers were willing to fork out an average month's salary because of the shoe's 100% frankincense wool make-up or the crucifix tied on to the shoe laces.

Possibly they were drawn in by the Matthew 14:25 quote on the jesus.shoes websites suggesting wearers would be able to walk on water.

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/us-news/nike-jesus-shoes-costing-2400-20550064
Holy water? Crosses? Maybe they're expecting vampires.
 

Austin Popper

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Only a loon ...

A company has answered the question of 'what would Jesus wear?' by creating a pair of $3,000 (£2,451) holy shoes.

Dubbed the 'Jesus Shoes', the Nike tick emblazoned sneakers have holy water in the soles. When they hit the shelves on Tuesday morning they sold out in a matter of minutes. It is not clear whether early buyers were willing to fork out an average month's salary because of the shoe's 100% frankincense wool make-up or the crucifix tied on to the shoe laces.

Possibly they were drawn in by the Matthew 14:25 quote on the jesus.shoes websites suggesting wearers would be able to walk on water.

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/us-news/nike-jesus-shoes-costing-2400-20550064
Onion on the verge of collapse.jpg
 

Shady

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Bud Spencer!!! :O Cool , loved his films with Terence Hill, specially Watch Out We're Mad, lol

That was aweful, the voices didn't belong to half of them and they couldn't dance to save their lives, that was appalling
 

Austin Popper

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Try and watch this without going WTF? at least once:

Do you think they were all miming?
That's just... well, you know, it's... hmmmmm... why was this enjoyable?

What a great song! I liked seeing some of those people again. The YT post even has some funny comments.

This is the final song of the internet, right?

It's like an LSD induced nightmare after passing out while watching late night cable TV!

I'm not sure but I think the bloke from Milli Vanilli is miming ...


and

This is definitely the last time I smoke cheese before bed...
 
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I'm not a happy bunny .. some prick of a delivery driver has just hammered the f--k out of my front door until I answered to receive something the Mrs has ordered .. and I mean hammered the f--k. I was deciding if I should chin him or not but he looked at me half naked then dashed off without asking me to sign his digi pad.

DING DONG SLAM SLAM SLAM .. DING DONG SLAM SLAM SLAM .. DING DONG SLAM SLAM SLAM all within the time frame of only about ten seconds. The only time someone should ever do that is during a genuine emergency .. prick

.. and I had a member of staff who I had to look after this morning because I found her on the floor with her legs shaking. She's lovely but she's an alcoholic in recovery. ffs
Which half of you was naked?
 
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Top half but that's not the point .. hammer on my front door and someone cocky enough to do that can move away from my door very quickly .. which he did ..
The story is funnier if you had your knob out.

Most stories are funnier when someone has their knob out, like that time I met the Queen.
 
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