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Toilet Talk

[T]he toilet....is not sold outside Japan.

Shucks. That's all I ever really wanted in the whole world - to see a toilet catch on fire.

That's even more important to me than the breeding pair of hippopotami.

Some people have ALL the luck.

Drat!

* kicks computer table leg *
 
A friend of mine, who lived many years in Japan, visited a friend deep in the mountains in the most traditional house you could imagine.

She needed the loo, and was thinking `hole in the floor` with some trepedation.

When she got there it was the most hi tech toto imaginable.

And she was even more intimidated by all those buttons...
 
I was in pub in town here a couple of months ago, and as I had made use of the facilities, I opened the door to go back to the bar, when a female voice shouted "HEY! I HOPE YOU WASHED YOUR HANDS!".

Momentarily stunned, I looked up to see a motion detector behind the door, and a speaker over the doorway. It didn't say anything when I went in (I had, infact washed my hands). Pretty clever, I thought.
 
Apparently, she just didn't want to come out.
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/03/13/toilet_woman/

US woman spends two years on boyfriend's toilet
Belated emergency call prompts crowbar rescue

The Register.Co.UK By Lester Haines. 13th March 2008

US authorities are trying to work out why a Kansas woman spent two years on her boyfriend's toilet - so long that by the time he called emergency services her skin had grown around the lav's seat.

When the unnamed 35-year-old Ness City woman's other half finally picked up the phone on 27 February to report that "there was something wrong with his girlfriend", police found her "sitting on the toilet, her sweat pants down to her mid-thigh". She was, according to Ness County Sheriff Bryan Whipple, "somewhat disoriented", and apparently suffering from atrophied legs.

While she initially said she "didn't need any help, that she was OK and did not want to leave", she was eventually convinced a trip to hospital was in order. Whipple explained: "We pried the toilet seat off with a pry bar and the seat went with her to the hospital. The hospital removed it."

Whipple elaborated: "She was not glued. She was not tied. She was just physically stuck by her body. It is hard to imagine... I still have a hard time imagining it myself."

Investigators were yeserday due to present their report to the county attorney who will decide "whether any charges should be filed against the woman's 36-year-old boyfriend", as ABC puts it.

He reportedly told the authorities he'd taken his bog-bound squeeze food and water every day, and asked her "to come out of the bathroom". Whipple said: "And her reply would be, 'Maybe tomorrow'. According to him, she did not want to leave the bathroom."

The former privy prisoner is now described as "in fair condition at a hospital in Wichita, about 150 miles southeast of Ness City", but has "refused to cooperate with medical providers or law enforcement investigators".

Neighbour James Ellis said he'd known the woman since she was a child but hadn't seen her for about six years. He explained that she'd "had a tough childhood after her mother died at a young age and apparently was usually kept inside the house as she grew up".

He concluded: "It really doesn't surprise me. What surprises me is somebody wasn't called in a bit earlier." ®
US Source: http://www.kansascity.com/news/breaking_news/story/527676.html

That'd be a double :shock: :shock: with a side order of :shock: to go!
 
There are so many unpleasant images involved in that one short article it's hard to know where to start but 'bog-bound squeeze' has just overtaken Rynner's 'fluffy woo-woo central' in my top 100 phrases of all time.

I've related elsewhere that one of the most unpleasant episodes of my life involved reading Heart of Darkness in its entirety while sitting all night wrapped (strategically wrapped I suppose I should say, otherwise things could have got even messier) in a sleeping bag on a campsite toilet in Spean Bridge. I could hardly walk next day due to all the nerves at the back of my leg being deadened...and that was just after one night. The sooner IKEA develop an ergonomic bog seat the better - although they'd have to find it one of those daft names they give to everything. The Bottï, maybe. They could have one of those in-store test machines - Hej! Did you know that every one of our Bottïs is rigorously tested for strength and safety by being sat on 40, 000 times at high speed by a 35 year-old woman from Kansas?
 
I presume this man had a second bathroom, or he would have called the EMTs long before her legs atrophied.

It just goes to show how abnormal things can get, a bit at a time, before you wake up one day and realize you've got to do something.
 
i apologize, i'm not a native speaker, but what does this sentence mean? i just don't get it:

he'd taken his bog-bound squeeze food and water every day,



and i'm sorry if i sound involuntarily funny. i just don't understand what it means.
 
Yeah, I was going to post that one - but I knew someone would anyway.

Reminds me of that woman who basically merged into a sofa over a few years.

The aspects of hygiene involved (or the lack thereof) are mindboggling.

Put me right off my breakfast.
 
ginoide said:
i apologize, i'm not a native speaker, but what does this sentence mean? i just don't get it:

he'd taken his bog-bound squeeze food and water every day,



and i'm sorry if i sound involuntarily funny. i just don't understand what it means.

Squeeze is just a slang noun here for a girlfriend. Bog-bound = glued to the toilet.

:)
 
oh. thank you. ii would have never got it.

so weird. it's a variation on the "couple found living with 1,200 cats" theme, in a way
 
Is this story a Flush In The Pan? When I read the story, I thought it was un-bowl-evable! I think I'll stop the bad jokes there, but I found the story both funny and just a bit creepy...
 
JamesWhitehead said:
Squeeze is just a slang noun here for a girlfriend. Bog-bound = glued to the toilet.:)

Of course "bog-bound squeeze" could also be an appropriate term to describe certain physical actions (rendered unnecessary by the application of prunes and castor oil) familiar to those suffering from the opposite problem to the one I endured in Spean Bridge.
 
Zilch5 said:
Reminds me of that woman who basically merged into a sofa over a few years.

I was recently discussing this with a friend. They didn't believe me when I mentioned that the medical staff had to surgically remove the woman's skin from the sofa (like the woman in the OP who had to have the toilet seat removed in hospital).


480-Pound Woman Dies After Six Years On Couch
 
barfing_pumpkin said:
The woman was completely potty, if you ask me.

And to think I felt slightly guilty about making fun of this woman and her condition. To see others doing so is a relief!
 
47Forteans said:
barfing_pumpkin said:
The woman was completely potty, if you ask me.

And to think I felt slightly guilty about making fun of this woman and her condition. To see others doing so is a relief!

I too had slight reservations until I remembered that the presence of a toilet in a story, any story, trumps (sorry) all other considerations of taste. Trust me; it's written down in the big book of life.
 
I read yesterday that she was only only the toilet since Late January, but living in the bathroom for two years. :?

The boyfriend may be brought up on charges for not taking care of a dependent.....
 
Here's a news vid that has an interview with the boyfriend. Unbelievably, he states that he wants to look after her once she's been discharged from hospital.

I wouldn't want to leave one of my houseplants in his care let alone his missus :shock:
 
TheQuixote said:
Here's a news vid that has an interview with the boyfriend. Unbelievably, he states that he wants to look after her once she's been discharged from hospital.

I wouldn't want to leave one of my houseplants in his care let alone his missus :shock:


That was depressing. :(

And yeah, that he wants to look after her..........speechless.

It's just sad and unbelievable that he didn't call for help in the first place, but even more unbelievable to comprehend how it got to that point where she was bonded to the seat and her legs were atrophied.....

If they are both mentally ill, and he was just trying to protect her and her form of agoraphobia of sorts, Oh I can't even rationalize this is my head.
 
Olympics crisis over squat loos

China is rushing to install sit-down loos for its 500,000 foreign Olympics visitors, after complaints that venues had only Asian-style squat toilets.
A lack of Western-style facilities was a common complaint after some 30 test events at Games venues, officials said.

"A lot of parties have raised the question of toilets... We have told the venues to improve on this," said Yao Hui, deputy head of venue management.

He said bathroom renovations were already under way at three key venues.

"Most of the Chinese people are used to the squat toilet, but nowadays more and more people demand sit-down toilets," said Mr Yao.

"However, it will take some time for this transition."

He said that the proportion of squat toilets to sit-down facilities would vary depending on the nature of each venue.

But he said most of the lavatories at the 91,000-seat National Stadium - known as the Bird's Nest, the Water Cube and the National Indoor Stadium "should be" sit-down style.

Beijing is said to be spending at least US$40bn on 37 venues for sporting events at the August Olympics, 31 of which are in Beijing.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/asia-p ... 304246.stm
 
A news update. The boyfriend's to be charged with mistreatment.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2008/mar/20/usa1

Man charged over girlfriend found stuck on toilet

guardian.co.uk Sadie Gray and agencies, Thursday March 20 2008

A man in America whose girlfriend sat on the toilet for so long she became stuck to the seat has been charged with her mistreatment.

Kory McFarren, 37, of Ness City, Kansas, called police last month saying there was something wrong with Pam Babcock.

Officers arrived to find she been sitting on the lavatory for a month. They had to prise the seat off with a crowbar so she could be taken to hospital with it still attached to her legs.

McFarren said Babcock, 35, was scared to leave the bathroom. He was not sure how long she had been in there, but said she may have been in there for up to two years.

He took her food and water every day and repeatedly asked her to come out, to which she usually replied "maybe tomorrow", he told the Ness County sheriff's office.

McFarren has been charged with the mistreatment of a dependent adult, and will appear before a court next month.

Craig Crosswhite, the Ness County attorney, said: "I looked at the statutes and spoke to the attorney general's office. This was a very unusual set of circumstances, and this is the law that most closely applied to the situation."

McFarren said: "The only thing I am guilty of is I didn't get her help sooner."

Babcock had been sitting on the lavatory for so long that open sores had developed on her legs, causing her to stick to the seat. Her skin had begun to grow around the seat.

She was found sitting upright, fully clothed, with her tracksuit trousers pulled up to mid-thigh. "She would have to be sleeping on the toilet," said Sheriff Bryan Whipple.

He said she seemed "somewhat disorientated" and her legs appeared to have atrophied. But she told officers she did not need help and did not want to leave.

She has since refused to speak to the police, and officials said it was unclear whether she had a mental or physical disability.

Babcock was taken to hospital in Wichita where doctors said an infection in her legs had caused nerve damage that could mean she has to use a wheelchair. She remains in hospital.
He probably deserves it. :(
 
It seems we have a world toilet crisis :shock:

Romania caught short in loo row

Preparations for next month's Nato summit in Romania are being overshadowed by a row - over toilets.
Parliamentary official Mihai Unghianu says Nato has complained that there are not enough lavatories at the venue.

Nato is said to have asked the government to install 1,000 temporary toilets - one for every five delegates, each costing $9,500 (£4,700) a week.

Nato has not publicly commented on the issue. Key talks on its Afghanistan mission are expected at the summit.

It will take place at the vast parliamentary palace in Bucharest, built for the late dictator Nicolae Ceausescu, but now the site for both houses of parliament.

The palace is among the largest buildings in the world, and although it has more than 1,000 halls and rooms, and 4,500 chandeliers, it appears to be short on some of the bare essentials. :shock:

The dispute emerged after minutes from a parliamentary committee meeting were leaked.

'Architectural jewel'

According to these, in the meeting Mr Unghianu reported that after Nato officials had asked him for the plans of the building, they said they were displeased with both the number and quality of the toilet facilities.

Nato suggested the installation of temporary toilets, but Bucharest objected that they did not have the money to fit them, and that they might upset the aesthetic appeal of what some consider to be an architectural jewel of a building.

The palace's architect, Anca Petrescu, has called the request for extra temporary facilities humiliating.

She told Romania's Adevarul newspaper that all the toilets would be working during the summit, and suggested that someone with portable toilets for hire was trying to make money at the taxpayers' expense. :roll:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/7306622.stm
 
Nato is said to have asked the government to install 1,000 temporary toilets - one for every five delegates, each costing $9,500 (£4,700) a week.

Wouldn't it have been more cost-effective to select delegates willing to spend less than twenty percent of their time in the lavatories?
 
Toilets at events such as conferences tend to be used at the same times such as in between talks, and at arrival and leaving.

Having to queue, especially for substandard facilities, is what's really 'humiliating', firstly for delegates and ultimately for the hosts.

So the more bogs, the better. ;)
 
Got you. I was thinking more of my own habit of waddling off to the lavatories right during the middle of proceedings when things are nice, quiet and uncrowded.
 
Patch 'halts holiday diarrhoea'

Stomach bugs picked up during foreign travel may be prevented by wearing a patch impregnated by toxins produced by the E. coli bacterium.

US research published in the Lancet medical journal found the patch was 75% effective against diarrhoea attacks caused by E. coli among volunteers.

Patch-wearers who did fall ill recovered far more quickly, it said.

A UK travel medicine specialist stressed only 40% of diarrhoea cases were caused by E. coli.

Stomach upsets are commonplace among people travelling to certain parts of the world, and the symptoms - vomiting, diarrhoea and stomach cramps, can often leave people incapacitated or weak for days.

The study authors, who work a biotech company IOMAI in Maryland, estimated that they affect up to 27 million travellers each year.

Their patch contains the poisons produced by E.coli, with the idea that this primes the immune system to cope better when confronted with the real thing.

Their study involved 178 people who were given either a placebo 'dummy' patch, or one containing the toxin, then sent off to continue their journey through Mexico or Guatemala.

A fifth of those with the "dummy" patches developed moderate diarrhoea, four times more than in the treated group. The difference was even more pronounced in cases of severe diarrhoea.

Even when someone with an E.coli patch fell ill, they got better quicker - half a day compared with two days on average.

They wrote: "This study suggests that transcutaneous immunisation with LT in a patch could protect travellers against this common, debilitating ailment."

Worthwhile expense

Dr Richard Dawood, who runs a specialist travel health clinic in London, said the effects of the patch were similar to those produced by a vaccination against cholera, which, as a side effect, offers some protection against E. coli.

He said: "E.coli causes an estimated 40% of all travellers' diarrhoea, so this does not offer complete protection.

"However, if you are travelling abroad for commercial reasons, or with the military, it may be worthwhile paying for this sort of treatment.

"If you've paid several thousand pounds to take your family on holiday abroad, every day lost is worth hundreds of pounds, so it could be an advantage here, too."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/7447909.stm

I have to declare an interest here - my daughter's doing a PhD in E.coli! :hmm:
 
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