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Weird Business-Proposition Emails

Funny spam I got in my work account this week

Why Your Colon May Secretly Be Killing You!

Most Doctors Are Overlooking This And Our Research Shows That Even If You Take A Probiotic Everyday It Might Not Be Working Correctly

If you are sick and tired of digestive problems, constipation, and fatigue. Or, if you are fed up with weight gain or bloating, then this news will interest you. That's because you are about to discover...

Why your colon may secretly be killing you...

Secrets about your poop that most people will never know...

Why taking probiotics not be benefiting - or may even be harming - your health and wellbeing...

And much more...

Click Here To Discover Why Your Colon May Be Killing You Now!

In this eye-opening presentation, you also will hear about a new patented breakthrough that provides all day relief. This is unlike anything you've ever seen before.
 
OneWingedBird said:
Funny spam I got in my work account this week

Why Your Colon May Secretly Be Killing You!

Most Doctors Are Overlooking This And Our Research Shows That Even If You Take A Probiotic Everyday It Might Not Be Working Correctly

If you are sick and tired of digestive problems, constipation, and fatigue. Or, if you are fed up with weight gain or bloating, then this news will interest you. That's because you are about to discover...

Why your colon may secretly be killing you...

Secrets about your poop that most people will never know...

Why taking probiotics not be benefiting - or may even be harming - your health and wellbeing...

And much more...

Click Here To Discover Why Your Colon May Be Killing You Now!

In this eye-opening presentation, you also will hear about a new patented breakthrough that provides all day relief. This is unlike anything you've ever seen before.

You may only have a semi-colon.
 
Oh dear.

A “naive” solicitor fell victim to a classic scam when he handed over €242,000 client monies on the promise of getting €26.8 million from a Nigerian oil company, the High Court has been told.

No client of James J Maher, formerly practising as a partner in James Maher & Co, Essex Quay, Dublin, was left out of pocket because Mr Maher subsequently got an inheritance from an uncle which enabled him pay the money back, the court also heard.

Mr Maher (53) was subsequently diagnosed as having suffered from bipolar disorder throughout his life.

Two psychiatrists differed over whether this was the cause of him falling for the scam, the court heard. ...

http://www.irishtimes.com/news/crim...f-solicitor-in-26m-nigeria-oil-scam-1.2141939
 
This turned up in my spam today:

"Good afternoon my dear friend!

I am the beginner in the Internet also was the first attempt to find friends in the Internet. I feel slightly uncertainly.
I was registered on this site and found your structure. It is interesting to me to learn you closer.
I have overlooked to speak you about myself. My name Elena and I am 26 years. I live in small city of Russia.
I hope that it does not frighten you. My opinion has no value for you, but I want that you knew that I have only the good relation to you and your country.
I want that you wrote to me on my personal address - email removed.

I shall hope that you write to me very soon. I shall send necessarily to you my some photos when you will write to me! And I also want to see your photos.
I sincerely wait for your letter. Do not overlook email removed again.

Sincerely yours Elena"

I wonder what the scam is? Perhaps they strike up a friendship and then tell you they need money for something?
 
This turned up in my spam today:

"Good afternoon my dear friend!

I am the beginner in the Internet also was the first attempt to find friends in the Internet. I feel slightly uncertainly.
I was registered on this site and found your structure. It is interesting to me to learn you closer.
I have overlooked to speak you about myself. My name Elena and I am 26 years. I live in small city of Russia.
I hope that it does not frighten you. My opinion has no value for you, but I want that you knew that I have only the good relation to you and your country.
I want that you wrote to me on my personal address - email removed.

I shall hope that you write to me very soon. I shall send necessarily to you my some photos when you will write to me! And I also want to see your photos.
I sincerely wait for your letter. Do not overlook email removed again.

Sincerely yours Elena"

I wonder what the scam is? Perhaps they strike up a friendship and then tell you they need money for something?

....and before you know it that person will certainly warm to you and send some interesting photographs and yearn to visit your country...Its not SPAM its SCAM.
 
What's not to like? ;)

Hi, Every morning I try to meet with a smile! I am a cheerful, intelligent women and I am looking for real man who becomes a lovely husband for me. My name is Martha http://tyctadmgow.byethost12.com I am not looking for man who will come and will make me happy. I want to build sweet relations with him and create a happy family. And I believe that it is real!
I am very appealing and peaceable lady, I love life, music, good weather and close people around me. Let's get acquainted? Regards, Martha.
 
I keep getting a version of this in ma junk just lately, it appears that they are sending it to anyone named Julie, with a different surname
i want a new f*ck friend right now. do u have a big c*ck? let's hangout! my username is SexiSamantha24
To be honest if your name is Julie i doubt very much you have a big c*ck
 
Beach Combing ‏@DrBeachcombing 3h3 hours ago
The original Nigerian email swindle. Enjoy

CJ8Ko8vW8AA9-Cu.jpg
 
Non of your business Guv, look I quit this shite job....your a right ****** and in the morning Im making arangements that will greatly improve my finances...so long suckers :p
:eek:o_O
 
And a few days later Willis heads back to his police station with his tail between his legs and not much cash left in his account.

Erm, yes, hello Sarge its Willis....I`d like to report a scam involving the loss of my money...any chance of getting my job back too guv?
 
And a few days later Willis heads back to his police station with his tail between his legs and not much cash left in his account.

Erm, yes, hello Sarge its Willis....I`d like to report a scam involving the loss of my money...any chance of getting my job back too guv?
Who is inspector Willis? :confused:
 
This should belong in weird business proposition emails thread but I have yet to find a thread with this so called search function, so I will post it here. Please move it if soneone knows where it is:

"Good day dear friend, I am Mr Boris Mayor, I am contacting you in
respect of late client Mr Sergey Berdimbetova from federation of
Russia, he is my client when he was alive, i am his lawyer that took
care of his properties. Mr Sergey Berdimbetova deposited the sum of
4.5 Million united state dollars in the bank here in Republic of
Togolese Lome Togo, now the bank requested that i provide his next of
kin or business partner to receive the fund, that is why i contacted
you therefore if you are interesting let me know so we can put heads
together and follow up the transaction 40% from the total sum will be
your share.

Looking forward to your urgent reply to ( )
Mr Boris"
 
'Boris Mayor'? :D
 
This should belong in weird business proposition emails thread but I have yet to find a thread with this so called search function, so I will post it here. Please move it if soneone knows where it is:

"Good day dear friend, I am Mr Boris Mayor, I am contacting you in
respect of late client Mr Sergey Berdimbetova from federation of
Russia, he is my client when he was alive, i am his lawyer that took
care of his properties. Mr Sergey Berdimbetova deposited the sum of
4.5 Million united state dollars in the bank here in Republic of
Togolese Lome Togo, now the bank requested that i provide his next of
kin or business partner to receive the fund, that is why i contacted
you therefore if you are interesting let me know so we can put heads
together and follow up the transaction 40% from the total sum will be
your share.

Looking forward to your urgent reply to ( )
Mr Boris"

Moved.
 
This one came into my work today... obviously the last bit has me sold on the idea:

From: Jessica Lee <[email protected]>
Date: 22 July 2015 at 16:37
Subject: 1st Page of Google
To: [email protected]

Hi,


My name is Jessica Lee and I work for SEO base Company

While helping another client in your industry, I found several problems affecting your website search rankings, such as:

  • Broken links, missing meta tags, and HTML errors;
  • Lack of compatibility with all mobile devices;
  • Several 'bad' or 'suspicious' links pointing to your website;
  • Limited social media signals for your website.
These problems are why your site is not doing as well as it should on Google.


If you'd like to fix these problems and get your website on the 1st page of Google for your keywords, please send me your telephone # and the best time to call. I will be more than happy to reach out and discuss your needs.


Our prices are super affordable, and we have no problem sharing results we’ve achieved for our clients.


Best Regards,



Jessica Lee

SEO Specialist

PS: This is not spam. I studied your website, and I can help with your website promotion. If you do not want me to contact you, you can ignore this email or ask to remove and I will not contact again.
 
Two today. One offering me a very specific weekly income:

Subject: Money Making Tools
From: Barton Kimble<[email protected]>
Hi,
Could you get by with an average weekly income
of $3,633? You´re not alone. Lot´s of people
like you want in on this. Hustle up.
Regards
Barton Kimble


I do like the name 'Barton Kimble' and his cheery catchphase "hustle up!". He sounds like a Mark Twain character. Also, this:

Subject: Hi Dear
From: Ruth Naoka<[email protected]>
hi dear
How are you doing in life I am Miss Ruth and you?


Short and to the point, I guess.
 
Apparently they've caught all the scammers and are going to give me my $5 million back!




FROM THE UNITED NATIONS POLICE (UNPOL)
REGARDING RECOVERY OF YOUR LOST MONEY.

Attn:


We hereby inform you that the Scotland Yard Police, Interpol, Federal
Bureau of Investigation, (FBI) United States of America, the Economic
and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) of Nigeria and all the African
Crime fighter leaders have come together to stop scam/internet fraud in
Nigeria and all round Africa. We have recovered over US$2.6 Billion
United State Dollars from the people we have behind bars.


Listed below are the name of frausters and banks behind the non release of your funds.



1) Sanusi Lamido
2) Ms. Carman L. Lapointe
2) Micheal Edward
3) Chief Joseph Sanusi
3) Dr Godwin Emefiele
4) Mrs. Sherry Williams
5) Robert S. Mueller, III
6) Barrister David Scott
7) Mr. James B. Comey Jr
8) Barrister Ucheuzo Williams
9) Dr. Patrick Aziza Deputy Governor - Policy / Board Member
10) Mr. Dan Rochas (I.M.F)
11) Mrs. Tanner Williams
12) Mr Wilson Norman
13) Dr. Godwin Oboh: Director Union Bank Of Nigeria.
14) Mr. John Collins: Global Diplomat Director.
15) Foreign fund diplomatic courier
16) Mrs. Jennifer Saldana
17) Mr Jim Ovia: Zenith Bank Plc In Nigeria


Our duty is to make sure we stop internet scam and money laundering. we
have jailed alot of fraudsters . We go all over Africa to pick this
internet rats,We have over 8,273 of them in our jail around Africa and
we are still looking for more. We are aware that a lot of foreigners out
there have been deceived and lost their hard earn money to these
fraudsters after promising them percentages in their letters/e-mails for
their impending help to move funds out Africa including fake lottery
winning notification and at the end of the day, they will collect
thousands of dollars from you without a successful end. It was agreed
that to retain the good image of our country and the rest of African
countries, all the victims who lost his/her hard earn money to these
faceless thieves will be compensated with just US$5,000,000,00 (Five
Million United State Dollars).


This we assume will help you to start a new life. Please, we apologies that you take our offer
as little as it is due to the fact that (victims) in our pay list are
too numerous. We en-back on this pay back from the money we recovered
from these fraudsters, So you are advise to contact Mr. Thomas Wedge and
let him know if you are still interested to get your Master Card as he
have been waiting to hear from you to help him complete this delivery to
you. contact him with your personal information below for the release
of your Master Card worth US$5,000,000,00.

NOTE: You are advised to furnish Mr. Thomas Wedge With $350 and also your correct
and valid details. Also be informed that the amount to be paid to you is
$5,000,000.00 (Five Million United State Dollars). We expect your
urgent response to this E-mail to enable us monitor this payment
effectively thereby making contact with Mr. Thomas Wedge. As directed to
avoid further delay.


Provide your details below and forward it to Mr. Thomas Wedge for the release of your Master Card.

FLL NAME.......
PHONE NUMBER.....
COUNTRY....
STATE.......
SEX.............
OCCUPATION........
AGE......

Contact Name: Mr. Thomas Wedge
Contact Email Address: [email protected]

Thanks and remain Bless
Mr. Michael J. Burn.
Supervising Manager
 
An offer too good to refuse!

FLL NAME....... Jiminy Cricket
PHONE NUMBER..... 666 1066
COUNTRY.... Kernow
STATE....... The usual mess
SEX............. Yes Please!
OCCUPATION........ Fraud Busting
AGE...... 700

:p
 
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