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What's Your Jinx/What's Your Luck?

... On the other hand, I seldom have a bad Friday the 13th. ...

If anything, the Fridays falling on the 13th have consistently been among the best of my Fridays. I first noticed this circa 50 years ago as a teenager, and I've casually looked forward to them with hope rather than dread ever since.
 
I suppose one of my jinxes has been pets, and it could well be the jinx was of my own making ...

As a child, I had lots of pets (mainly dogs), and (for the record ... ) all were well loved and well cared for.

Unfortunately, our house faced onto the main highway leading out of my hometown, and the vast majority of my canine pals ended up as street pizza. Those that we managed to keep off the highway almost always fell victim to mystery degenerative illnesses at relatively young ages and either died in front of me or had to be put down by the vet. Bottom Line: Pets, no matter how carefully cared for, were heartaches waiting to happen.

I therefore forbade myself from owning pets by the time I was in high school.

As to the jinx being self-inflicted ...

I was a mere toddler when I had the first pet the family acknowledged as 'mine' - a mainly Chow Chow mix named Sparky. For reasons unknown, I almost immediately traded Sparky to my older cousin for Midnight - a solid black kitten - because I somehow liked cats better than dogs.

One day the adults made a big project of washing Sparky and a few other family dogs. My toddler mind figured this was something one responsibly does with one's pets. I set about to exercise my own pet owner responsibilities by washing Midnight in a large tub of rainwater at my grandparents' house nearby. Midnight didn't like this at all, and it took a lot of effort to keep dunking him, all the while assuring him he needed to be clean. It took a while for Midnight to quit struggling so I could properly finish the bath.

Soon thereafter, my parents noticed me toddling back toward our house from my grandparents', clutching Midnight in both hands and occasionally stopping to closely examine the cat. Concerned I might be harming the cat, they came out to meet me. I raised the inert black feline to them and said, "Kitty no move!?!"

Yeah, that's right - the lead-off entry on my pet ownership resume was drowning a black cat. :eek: :headbang:

I suppose this explains my miserable luck with subsequent pets. To add insult to injury, the exception that proved the rule was Sparky ('my' first dog, whom I traded for Midnight). Sparky alone outlived all other family pets of that era, crisscrossed the deadly highway with impunity, and died at a venerable 14 or 15 years of age.

Sparky seemed particularly fond of me over the years, and I often joked he loved me out of gratitude for trading him away and allowing him to escape my curse. :evil:
 
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OneWingedBird said:
You might find yourself wishing those two screws were ini there if you're using it for... something more strenuous. :rofl:
At my age putting the bed together was strenuous enough :(

lol I know the feeling... I sleep in a cabin bed these days. ;)
 
It has happened so many times that my family remark upon it: if there's one particular flavour/recipe/sauce/drink that I really like that isn't the most popular, it will soon be discontinued.

My approval is the kiss of death.

I've been going on about this for years and can only assume that the products I favour are either generally unadmired or are too expensive to manufacture, being of such recklessly above-average quality that profit margins are affected.* I'm not a huge fan of ready meals etc, but whenever I find a product that exceeds expectations I can guarantee it'll suddenly disappear from the shelves. First it was a selection of authentic curries, then a lovely paella-in-a-bag, a lentil moussaka, a cheap but uniquely tasty salmon paste, then those lamb 'dalesteaks' without mint, and many more. If I like it, it will be discontinued within a year.

What really feeds my paranoia is that a supermarket sugar-free 'orange juice drink' of which I was fond vanished overnight when the new sugar tax was introduced. Coincidence...or something more sinister?

Another great food-related injustice concerns my habit of photographing meals - a 'hobby' which predates the digital camera age as I always really enjoyed the food porn in cookbooks and takeaway menus (yes I know they paint the grub with all sorts of poisonous cack). Now that everyone and their dog takes snaps of their dinner I am too stubborn to pack it in but feel the need to apologise: 'sorry but you know I'm gonna take a photo and probably look a colossal wanker...', I'll say. But I'm fortunate to have friends who'll reply "Yeah, but you did do it before anyone else...", you know...to humour me and that.

Edit: in fact, certain friends will join in and get their phones or cameras out in a sort of digital saying of Grace before anyone tucks in, but I know they're not really into it. I like to think they're aware that I feel self-conscious through no fault of my own and so, in a very, very trivial, way, they are proving themselves the sort of people who'd shave their heads should I ever undergo chemotherapy.

* In other words I either have very poor, or very refined tastes.
 
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What really feeds my paranoia is that a supermarket sugar-free 'orange juice drink' of which I was fond vanished overnight when the new sugar tax was introduced. Coincidence...or something more sinister?
I'd always go for the 'sinister' explanation.
 
i was mildly well known on my stamping ground for being the angel of death for city centre bars, always on a bukowski ticket i had a jones for long empty bars that most people would pass by ... i spent most of the nineties on this legend of the holy drinker crap ... inevitably when i sat down at your bar it was only a matter of months, sometimes weeks, until you closed for refurbishment ... on the plus side it kept me in waitresses and was responsible for me ripping my kitchen out and installing a full working bar in its place ... i still love sitting at long empty bars, although the opportunities are less these days
 
I'd always go for the 'sinister' explanation.

Yep. You're quite right, of course. Government and supermarkets insist that the sugar tax doesn't benefit stores or directly penalise the customer, but there must be something funny going on when sugar-free products are replaced by more caloric versions almost to the day that a tax is introduced 'to fight obesity'...
 
If you're going to take photos of your food then it's only right that you should get a snap of the corresponding bowel movement the next day.


(that'll be a thing in 2017, mark my words)
 
If you're going to take photos of your food then it's only right that you should get a snap of the corresponding bowel movement the next day.


(that'll be a thing in 2017, mark my words)

I disagree. Not only would that be unpleasant and get everyone banned from instagram, it would also be unnecessary as the secret government scientists bunkered beneath our houses will have such records already, along with detailed analyses*.

This originally happened under some communist regime or other (?). It was in FT.

* Hurh, hurhh, I said 'anal'.
 
I've just remembered a long-held belief of mine, that every now and then everything changes. New job, new partner, new house, whatever. An aspect of my life changed a couple of years ago. A bit of an upheaval but overall it was positive.
 
An aspect of my life changed a couple of years ago. A bit of an upheaval but overall it was positive.
Most of my upheavals have been negative.

Still recovering from most of them. :(
 
I disagree. Not only would that be unpleasant and get everyone banned from instagram, it would also be unnecessary as the secret government scientists bunkered beneath our houses will have such records already, along with detailed analyses*.

Yeah but think how much it would liven up our very own Toilet Talk thread. Instead of having Rynner describe the shite he had this morning whilst I was munching away at my Marmite on toast, I would have been able to see it in all it's pan-blocking glory.
 
I've found with possessions if there is something I really really like it will inevitably get lost or broken so I try to just like things so that nothing happens to them.
 
Yeah but think how much it would liven up our very own Toilet Talk thread. Instead of having Rynner describe the shite he had this morning whilst I was munching away at my Marmite on toast, I would have been able to see it in all it's pan-blocking glory.

There was a website dedicated to excremental imaging a few years ago. Someone thought they'd show me it - imagining I'd appreciate the hilarity.

(I didn't)

I think it was eventually shut down by the hosting company.
 
There was a website dedicated to excremental imaging a few years ago. Someone thought they'd show me it - imagining I'd appreciate the hilarity.

(I didn't)

I think it was eventually shut down by the hosting company.

ratemypoo if I remember. The receptionist at work thought it was "brilliant" - her viewing habits were nipped in the bud when someone important saw what she was looking at.
 
There was a website dedicated to excremental imaging a few years ago. Someone thought they'd show me it - imagining I'd appreciate the hilarity.

(I didn't)

I think it was eventually shut down by the hosting company.

Was it called fecebook?

More seriously, I have no luck in any games of chance. But growing up I had a friend whose entire family was lucky. They won the local lottery several times, he won raffles, entries at local fair's etc., most of which we both entered. I remember going over to his house one time and his dad was showing us a brand new entertainment system they'd won and he wasn't even that excited about it. I thought it was amazing and his response was 'oh, we win stuff all the time.'

If I am lucky in anything, I haven't found it yet.
 
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Welcome back, Mike - it's been a while :).

I too know someone who just seems to attract wins - he's a studious gambler, so works the odds with poker etc, but even with genuine chance stuff such as sweepstakes and lotteries has a much higher strike-rate than average. He doesn't ascribe it to any particular totem or ritual, but just instinct, and the same instinct also tells him when it's time to walk away, which he does.
 
I too know someone who just seems to attract wins - he's a studious gambler, so works the odds with poker etc, but even with genuine chance stuff such as sweepstakes and lotteries has a much higher strike-rate than average. He doesn't ascribe it to any particular totem or ritual, but just instinct, and the same instinct also tells him when it's time to walk away, which he does.

Yeah, compulsive - sorry, serious - gamblers will tell you that. They believe it themselves. They don't mention the scores of losses or the huge debts or the marriage at breaking point after yet another visit from the bailiffs.
 
I too know someone who just seems to attract wins - he's a studious gambler, so works the odds with poker etc, but even with genuine chance stuff such as sweepstakes and lotteries has a much higher strike-rate than average. He doesn't ascribe it to any particular totem or ritual, but just instinct, and the same instinct also tells him when it's time to walk away, which he does.

An old boyfriend's dad was lucky with gambling - with money in general, really - but we'd all go down to the racetrack and he'd place his bets based on the serial numbers of the money he bet on the horses. He'd always win. Meanwhile, I'd try to bet based on studying the odds, or by how the horses looked...sensible kinds of things...and pfft, nothing.

At least it taught me not to bother with gambling. :p
 
All of the good books on poker drum into you that the most important thing you should do is to keep a little black book (or a spreadsheet) of every single game played with the amount won or lost so you can see precisely where you're at. I've lost count of the number of self described 'fantastic poker players' that supposedly never had a loss that were clearly in massive denial.
 
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