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When Resurrection... Works?

Mighty_Emperor

Gone But Not Forgotten
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Well if true this pisses all over the When Ressurection Fails thread:

www.forteantimes.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=17304

If cobblers (which is what I'm leaning towards) then it is a suitably nutty tale so everyone's a winner:

03 February 2006, 14:32

A dismembered Arab sheikh raised from the dead after visiting an Orthodox convent - newspaper


Moscow, February 3, Interfax - One of the Saudi Arabia sheikhs ‘rose from the dead’ after visiting Panagia Saidnaya, an old convent near Damascus, the Trud daily writes on Friday.

After being killed and quartered, this man was sewed up anew with the use of some technology unknown to humanity, the newspaper says referring to medics who analyzed this unique occurrence.

The US military medics, who also took part in the expertise, came to the conclusion that it was a result of ‘the UFO interference’ and classified this information as secret.


According to the newspaper, the sheikh and his wife could not have children. They decided to go on their last journey together to Syria to venerate local Muslim shrines. One taxi-driver there advised them to visit the Sidnay Convent with its miracle-working Icon of the Mother of God, which often helped to childless families.

The sheikh promised to donate 80 thousand dollars to the convent and to give 20 thousand dollars to the driver if his prayers were answered. Nine months later, his wife gave birth to a hair. Happy sheikh went immediately to Damascus to fulfil his promise, came in contact with the driver and asked him to meet him at the airport.

The driver came with two ‘bodyguards’. On its way to the convent the car suddenly turned into a deserted place and the three men made a short work of the sheikh by cutting off his legs, arms and head. They took his money and jewels and put the remnants of the poor sheikh into the boot in order to drive him away to a safe place.

After a few kilometers the car suddenly stalled. A man who was driving by offered his help, but it was rudely rejected. But this Syrian felt something was wrong and called to the police, who came and caught the three accomplices unawares.

They all experienced an even greater shock after they opened the boot. The motionless and blooded body suddenly began to stir, then revived and stood up slightly rocking. The first words he said were: ‘This same Panagia has just finished sewing up my neck here…’

After this declaration, the driver and ‘his bodyguards’ went out of their mind.

www.interfax-religion.com/?act=news&div=940
 
Lost in translation?

My favorite part:

Nine months later, his wife gave birth to a hair.

Sorry, I know it's a typo [eta: on the part of the source website], but a good one!
 
It sounds like a rather elaborate version of the Indian rope trick. But without a rope. Or Indians.
 
This may well be a fake resurrection.

A group of funeral directors in South Africa say they will sue a self-styled prophet who claims to have resurrected a dead man.

A viral video of Pastor Alph Lukau shows him shouting "rise up" to a man laying down in a coffin who then jerks upright to cheers from worshippers. The funeral companies say they were manipulated into being involved. he spectacle, seen outside Pastor Lukau's church in Johannesburg, has been ridiculed and condemned by many.

"There are no such things as miracles," the Commission for the Promotion and Protection of Cultural, Religious and Linguistic Communities (CRL Rights Commission) told South Africa's national broadcaster.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-africa-47370398
 
They should have made sure. Embalming can be useful.
 
This may well be a fake resurrection.

A group of funeral directors in South Africa say they will sue a self-styled prophet who claims to have resurrected a dead man.

A viral video of Pastor Alph Lukau shows him shouting "rise up" to a man laying down in a coffin who then jerks upright to cheers from worshippers. The funeral companies say they were manipulated into being involved. he spectacle, seen outside Pastor Lukau's church in Johannesburg, has been ridiculed and condemned by many.

"There are no such things as miracles," the Commission for the Promotion and Protection of Cultural, Religious and Linguistic Communities (CRL Rights Commission) told South Africa's national broadcaster.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-africa-47370398

Will he take up the challenge?

A South African preacher has tried to confront another pastor for "bringing Christianity into disrepute" by staging a bogus resurrection.

Self-styled prophet Paseka "Mboro" Motsoeneng stood outside the locked gates of Pastor Alph Lukau's church and shouted "I'm here to get answers". He said if the pastor really had the power to resurrect, they should head over to Nelson Mandela's grave.

A viral video showing the supposed resurrection was widely mocked. It shows Mr Lukau shouting "rise up" to a man lying in a coffin who then jerks upright to cheers from worshippers. Funeral companies say they were manipulated into being involved.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-africa-47408289?ocid=socialflow_twitter#
 
Resurrection is a 7th level spell, you need to be at least a 13th level cleric to cast it, which I doubt he is. And even then it doesn't work on someone who died of old age, so no resurrecting Nelson Mandela.
 
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