World’s First Haunted Object 3D Scanning Project is Confusing Ghosts, Producing Paranormally-Active


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Jun 3, 2004
World’s First Haunted Object 3D Scanning Project is Confusing Ghosts, Producing Paranormally-Active Prints
By Martin Nelson on 06/17/2017

The Traveling Museum of the Paranormal & Occult, the world’s only mobile museum of haunted artifacts, has launched the first-ever initiative to 3D scan and compile a database of paranormally-active objects. There’s just a couple problems: the project is confusing the ghosts and producing haunted 3D prints.

“In hindsight, I guess we should have anticipated this,” occult museum director Greg Newkirk says, “but when it comes to working with haunted artifacts in new, unexplored ways, you never know what’s going to happen. We’re attempting something that’s never been done before, laying the groundwork for future study of paranormally-active objects. There are going to be quirks we can’t see coming.”

Newkirk is referring to the unintended consequences of the Haunted Object 3D Scanning Initiative, an effort to build a comprehensive database of the world’s most haunted artifacts. Launched in February, the project has seen Traveling Museum of the Paranormal & Occult founders Greg Newkirk and Dana Matthews scanning cursed idols, self-immolating Ouija planchettes, drums used to summon voodoo-spirits, and even a haunted mask with a habit of kickstarting out-of-body experiences. Unsurprisingly, the project is the first of its kind, combining the study of supernaturally-influenced artifacts with cutting-edge technology. But now that the project is four months in, the museum curators are discovering that it’s hard to teach an ancient spirit new tricks.

“Some objects just don’t want to be scanned,” Matthews says, gesturing to a large African idol with a history of causing intense nightmares (which they’ve nicknamed Billy). “In the case of Billy, he kept literally putting up a wall in front of his face every time we tried to scan it [see embedded video above]. We had to sit down and conduct an EVP session with him to find out he was just concerned about the scanning process; he didn’t understand what we were trying to do with him.”

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