Worst Movie EVER?

Bad Bungle

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I liked Dogma - great Cast and last outing for Bud Cort as comatose John Doe Jersey, who dies and turns into Alanis Morrisette. My nephews and niece were a bit bemused by the F word tirade by Jay, but that was so cartoonish it became funny. Oh and the Catholic Church hated it.
The only film where I wanted the wasted hour of my life back was GoodFellas - I only watched it because everyone was/still is raving about it - nah !
 

Swifty

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Dogma
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back
Clerks II
Smith's Cop Out was quite good as well. You should listen to the hilarious director's commentary for Jersey Girl, I'm surprised MIRAMAX being owned by Disney allowed it to get onto the DVD

Highlights include Jason Mewes talking about the time he was on the run from the police, his masturbation techniques in prison, his heroin habit and how much he fancies Liv Tyler and much more .. I can't imagine anyone at MIRAMAX actually listened to it first ..
 

Swifty

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I liked Dogma - great Cast and last outing for Bud Cort as comatose John Doe Jersey, who dies and turns into Alanis Morrisette. My nephews and niece were a bit bemused by the F word tirade by Jay, but that was so cartoonish it became funny. Oh and the Catholic Church hated it.
The only film where I wanted the wasted hour of my life back was GoodFellas - I only watched it because everyone was/still is raving about it - nah !
When Dogma came out in the states, quite a few Christians were protesting outside cinemas with signs and placards. Kevin Smith happened to be in one of those cinemas and decided to join one of the protests to shout down his own film just for a laugh as none of them knew what he looked like :)..

 

Bad Bungle

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When Dogma came out in the states, quite a few Christians were protesting outside cinemas with signs and placards. Kevin Smith happened to be in one of those cinemas and decided to join one of the protests to shout down his own film just for a laugh as none of them knew what he looked like :)..

How can Catholics protest against a film based around Plenary Indulgences when that is a Catholic dogma - or was it the portrayal of God as a woman that upset them (and the violence and swearing and Ben Affleck) ?
 

Swifty

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How can Catholics protest against a film based around Plenary Indulgences when that is a Catholic dogma - or was it the portrayal of God as a woman that upset them (and the violence and swearing and Ben Affleck) ?
I think they just blindly went after it without seeing it, a bit like when the same thing happened to The Life Of Brian ..

Jason Mewes is streaming a live game online in some hotel room in Chicago at the moment btw if you're bored ..

https://www.facebook.com/jaymewes/
 
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Bad Bungle

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I actually had respect for Mary Whitehouse, she saw something she didn't like and got off her arse and tried to do something about it. Agree with her or not (most didn't), without people like Mary, the right to challenge and make changes quietly disappears. But saying that, I was not impressed that she got Bournemouth Council to ban Life of Brian UNSEEN for 35 years - 'cos that's a cracking film
 

Swifty

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I actually had respect for Mary Whitehouse, she saw something she didn't like and got off her arse and tried to do something about it. Agree with her or not (most didn't), without people like Mary, the right to challenge and make changes quietly disappears. But saying that, I was not impressed that she got Bournemouth Council to ban Life of Brian UNSEEN for 35 years - 'cos that's a cracking film
She tried the same crap with The Evil Dead .. and failed.
 

maximus otter

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Bad Bungle

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She tried the same crap with The Evil Dead .. and failed.
True - but Sam Raimi said that if he'd known so much grief would come over 14 seconds of film, he would have gladly cut it out.
All the other 'video nasties' I remember in the News - Driller Killer, Tool Box Murders, I Spit on Your Grave etc - have all been released and re-made and I don't think civilisation has been enriched much as a result. Hats off to Troma Films at Cannes though for their marvellously titled 'I spit on Your Gravy'.
 

Swifty

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True - but Sam Raimi said that if he'd known so much grief would come over 14 seconds of film, he would have gladly cut it out.
All the other 'video nasties' I remember in the News - Driller Killer, Tool Box Murders, I Spit on Your Grave etc - have all been released and re-made and I don't think civilisation has been enriched much as a result. Hats off to Troma Films at Cannes though for their marvellously titled 'I spit on Your Gravy'.
Yeah, he regretted the tree rape scene .. or more accurately, he was surprised people were so offended by it what with it being so ludicrous and all .. it was actually Rob Tapert that had that idea to film that as was the women in chains in Army Of Darkness and the woman in chains in A Simple Plan up that tree .. Tapert's clearly somewhere between being kinky and a perv ..

I gave my first lecture on The Evil Dead at a film school in '90 (I've been a fan since '84 and was part of both of the video nasty sweeps) , part of my research was to get in touch with the then and now ex chief of police who was surprisingly candid on the telephone about the video nasty campaign spearheaded by Whitehouse and the DPP .. it turns out a young Sam Raimi actually flew over to England to defend his film at Snaresbrook Crown Court and ended up falling asleep in a waiting room due to jet lag, he was woken up in the waiting room by a court usher .. the judge presiding over the blocks of three films at a time said "Mr Raimi, it's your film and not you that's on trial." so Sam flew back home. His film was ultimately judged as not obscene although the rumours persisted it was on the banned list so people were still wrongly getting nicked for owning or distributing it all the way up to '90 with Palace Pictures copies being confiscated.

Driller Killer wasn't even 'so bad it's good' I think you'll agree .. it was just shit. As I was told and as I remember, the film were being judged by their gratuitous titles alone so Ilsa She Wolf Of The SS and Nightmares In A Damaged Brain (still the best ever title for a horror film IMO) were never going to stand a chance .. here's a true story from my past, this was during the second wave '89 raids .. The MP and the T Chest of Nasties

http://www.bookofthedead.ws/website/features_readers_tales.html
 

Bad Bungle

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here's a true story from my past, this was during the second wave '89 raids .. The MP and the T Chest of Nasties

http://www.bookofthedead.ws/website/features_readers_tales.html
That's brilliant Swifty, I can't top-trump that.
I was interested though in the ban on 'A Clockwork Orange', as this was apparently self-censorship by Kubrick. I used to visit friends in London and the story goes that an Usherette at King's Cross Scala got hold of a copy and decided to screen it.

'In 1993 the Scala Cinema Club went into receivership after losing a court case over an illegal screening of Stanley Kubrick’s A Clockwork Orange'.

Shame. On selected nights Scala would do a television triple on the big screen: one episode of Danger Man, followed by the Avengers (B&W) and one of the Prisoner. Best bit was that they sometimes left the TV Ads in - Kennomeat anyone ? Two cartoon dogs and their little man - collective audience sigh of nostalgia.
 

Swifty

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That's brilliant Swifty, I can't top-trump that.
I was interested though in the ban on 'A Clockwork Orange', as this was apparently self-censorship by Kubrick. I used to visit friends in London and the story goes that an Usherette at King's Cross Scala got hold of a copy and decided to screen it.

'In 1993 the Scala Cinema Club went into receivership after losing a court case over an illegal screening of Stanley Kubrick’s A Clockwork Orange'.

Shame. On selected nights Scala would do a television triple on the big screen: one episode of Danger Man, followed by the Avengers (B&W) and one of the Prisoner. Best bit was that they sometimes left the TV Ads in - Kennomeat anyone ? Two cartoon dogs and their little man - collective audience sigh of nostalgia.
You probably already know but the Scala cinema in London was owned by Stephen Woolley & Nick Powel, their office was above the cinema which was Palace Pictures that was later releasing VHS titles .. as far as I know, The Evil Dead remains the only film ever to have a timeline simultaneous home rental and cinema screen release as a gimmick .. and they organised blood donation vans William Castle promotion gimmick style for the showings where you could be issued with an "I BLED FOR THE EVIL DEAD" badge as long as you donated blood :cool:
 

sherbetbizarre

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An Important Discussion About John Travolta’s Speedboat Movie, ‘Speed Kills'


This is the actual poster for the movie. It has everything: Helicopters, speedboats, explosions, more helicopters, Travolta holding a gun and looking straight into my eyes with a facial expression that screams “Well, I guess I’m in a speedboat movie now.” Yes, I watched Speed Kills. It was somehow both more and less than what I expected. I’m sure you have questions about all of this. Please, fire away.
https://uproxx.com/movies/speed-kills-travolta-review-speedboats/
 

GNC

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Isn't "Speed Kills" what you sarcastically say to someone progressing very slowly? Like Travolta's career?

It's what a suppressive person would say, in fact.
 

GNC

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Cabin Boy has its moments, but it's neither as good as the cultists will tell you nor as bad as the haters will tell you. Either way, it's obvious why it wasn't a hit, or even a modest success.
 

GNC

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Don't know about EVER, but here's a pretty convincing list of the worst of the year:
Worst of '18 list

I've seen Caniba (offensively prurient - yet dull!), Death Wish (toothless baiting) and Mute (that is my pick for worst piece of shit I saw this year). I don't mind so bad it's good, but I have problems with so bad it's bad.
 

SkepticalX

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The worst movie I ever saw was The Villain from 1979. It starred Kirk Douglas, Ann-Margret, and Arnold Schwarzenegger and was essentially a live-action Roadrunner cartoon. So bad it actually hurt to watch. Not sure why any of these people signed-on for this unless it was purely for a pay-day.
 

Naughty_Felid

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The worst movie I ever saw was The Villain from 1979. It starred Kirk Douglas, Ann-Margret, and Arnold Schwarzenegger and was essentially a live-action Roadrunner cartoon. So bad it actually hurt to watch. Not sure why any of these people signed-on for this unless it was purely for a pay-day.
It was called Cactus Jack over here. As a kid I quite liked it :p
 

GNC

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The worst movie I ever saw was The Villain from 1979. It starred Kirk Douglas, Ann-Margret, and Arnold Schwarzenegger and was essentially a live-action Roadrunner cartoon. So bad it actually hurt to watch. Not sure why any of these people signed-on for this unless it was purely for a pay-day.
I saw it as Cactus Jack too - in the cinema. We thought it was one of the funniest things we'd ever seen. I was just a little kid, and some things should stay as memories, because I rewatched it and didn't laugh once, despite Kirk throwing himself into the role (or because of it). Same goes for Saturday the 14th: hilarious when you're a kid, rubbish as an adult.

Oh, and those people signed on because it was a Hal Needham film and his first two directorial efforts had been Smokey and the Bandit and Hooper, two of the most successful films of all time.
 

James_H

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When A Chinese Billionaire Tries To Film An Avatar Knockoff

In 2009, Jon Jiang was inspired by the stunning visuals of Avatar to make his own epic movie, Empires Of The Deep. That's a daunting task, especially since he was a real estate mogul with zero movie-making experience. But he did have a spare $140 million, so wrote a script that combined Greek mythology and Star Wars, set it underwater, and hired cast and crew from all over the world.
 

Jim

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Can you really top "Plan 9 From Outer Space". A cult classic farce, but lets face it Ed Wood was one of the worst - cheesiest directors of all time. Actually he made even worse Glenn or Glenda.
 

GNC

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Glen or Glenda is such a personal film, to the extent that it really wouldn't have made any sense to anyone except one person (Ed), that it's actually pretty fascinating. I'm not saying it's good, but it is strangely compelling.
 

henry

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empires of the deep - what a croc

drunk and wide awake at 2am i decided to watch homeboy, mickey rourkes self referential late 80s boxing flick, seemed rather rubbish at that time of the night even though i like mickey
 

Naughty_Felid

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Can you really top "Plan 9 From Outer Space". A cult classic farce, but lets face it Ed Wood was one of the worst - cheesiest directors of all time. Actually he made even worse Glenn or Glenda.
The Thing with Plan 9, like Glen or Glenda is it's also fascinating to watch. Worst films for me are the ones that bore me to tears.
 
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