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Worst Movie EVER?

here's a true story from my past, this was during the second wave '89 raids .. The MP and the T Chest of Nasties

http://www.bookofthedead.ws/website/features_readers_tales.html

That's brilliant Swifty, I can't top-trump that.
I was interested though in the ban on 'A Clockwork Orange', as this was apparently self-censorship by Kubrick. I used to visit friends in London and the story goes that an Usherette at King's Cross Scala got hold of a copy and decided to screen it.

'In 1993 the Scala Cinema Club went into receivership after losing a court case over an illegal screening of Stanley Kubrick’s A Clockwork Orange'.

Shame. On selected nights Scala would do a television triple on the big screen: one episode of Danger Man, followed by the Avengers (B&W) and one of the Prisoner. Best bit was that they sometimes left the TV Ads in - Kennomeat anyone ? Two cartoon dogs and their little man - collective audience sigh of nostalgia.
 
That's brilliant Swifty, I can't top-trump that.
I was interested though in the ban on 'A Clockwork Orange', as this was apparently self-censorship by Kubrick. I used to visit friends in London and the story goes that an Usherette at King's Cross Scala got hold of a copy and decided to screen it.

'In 1993 the Scala Cinema Club went into receivership after losing a court case over an illegal screening of Stanley Kubrick’s A Clockwork Orange'.

Shame. On selected nights Scala would do a television triple on the big screen: one episode of Danger Man, followed by the Avengers (B&W) and one of the Prisoner. Best bit was that they sometimes left the TV Ads in - Kennomeat anyone ? Two cartoon dogs and their little man - collective audience sigh of nostalgia.
You probably already know but the Scala cinema in London was owned by Stephen Woolley & Nick Powel, their office was above the cinema which was Palace Pictures that was later releasing VHS titles .. as far as I know, The Evil Dead remains the only film ever to have a timeline simultaneous home rental and cinema screen release as a gimmick .. and they organised blood donation vans William Castle promotion gimmick style for the showings where you could be issued with an "I BLED FOR THE EVIL DEAD" badge as long as you donated blood :cool:
 
An Important Discussion About John Travolta’s Speedboat Movie, ‘Speed Kills'

travspeed-poster.jpg

This is the actual poster for the movie. It has everything: Helicopters, speedboats, explosions, more helicopters, Travolta holding a gun and looking straight into my eyes with a facial expression that screams “Well, I guess I’m in a speedboat movie now.” Yes, I watched Speed Kills. It was somehow both more and less than what I expected. I’m sure you have questions about all of this. Please, fire away.
https://uproxx.com/movies/speed-kills-travolta-review-speedboats/
 
Isn't "Speed Kills" what you sarcastically say to someone progressing very slowly? Like Travolta's career?

It's what a suppressive person would say, in fact.
 
Cabin Boy has its moments, but it's neither as good as the cultists will tell you nor as bad as the haters will tell you. Either way, it's obvious why it wasn't a hit, or even a modest success.
 
Don't know about EVER, but here's a pretty convincing list of the worst of the year:
Worst of '18 list

I've seen Caniba (offensively prurient - yet dull!), Death Wish (toothless baiting) and Mute (that is my pick for worst piece of shit I saw this year). I don't mind so bad it's good, but I have problems with so bad it's bad.
 
The worst movie I ever saw was The Villain from 1979. It starred Kirk Douglas, Ann-Margret, and Arnold Schwarzenegger and was essentially a live-action Roadrunner cartoon. So bad it actually hurt to watch. Not sure why any of these people signed-on for this unless it was purely for a pay-day.
 
The worst movie I ever saw was The Villain from 1979. It starred Kirk Douglas, Ann-Margret, and Arnold Schwarzenegger and was essentially a live-action Roadrunner cartoon. So bad it actually hurt to watch. Not sure why any of these people signed-on for this unless it was purely for a pay-day.

It was called Cactus Jack over here. As a kid I quite liked it :p
 
The worst movie I ever saw was The Villain from 1979. It starred Kirk Douglas, Ann-Margret, and Arnold Schwarzenegger and was essentially a live-action Roadrunner cartoon. So bad it actually hurt to watch. Not sure why any of these people signed-on for this unless it was purely for a pay-day.

I saw it as Cactus Jack too - in the cinema. We thought it was one of the funniest things we'd ever seen. I was just a little kid, and some things should stay as memories, because I rewatched it and didn't laugh once, despite Kirk throwing himself into the role (or because of it). Same goes for Saturday the 14th: hilarious when you're a kid, rubbish as an adult.

Oh, and those people signed on because it was a Hal Needham film and his first two directorial efforts had been Smokey and the Bandit and Hooper, two of the most successful films of all time.
 
When A Chinese Billionaire Tries To Film An Avatar Knockoff

In 2009, Jon Jiang was inspired by the stunning visuals of Avatar to make his own epic movie, Empires Of The Deep. That's a daunting task, especially since he was a real estate mogul with zero movie-making experience. But he did have a spare $140 million, so wrote a script that combined Greek mythology and Star Wars, set it underwater, and hired cast and crew from all over the world.

 
Probably worth watching just for the visuals.
 
Can you really top "Plan 9 From Outer Space". A cult classic farce, but lets face it Ed Wood was one of the worst - cheesiest directors of all time. Actually he made even worse Glenn or Glenda.
 
Glen or Glenda is such a personal film, to the extent that it really wouldn't have made any sense to anyone except one person (Ed), that it's actually pretty fascinating. I'm not saying it's good, but it is strangely compelling.
 
empires of the deep - what a croc

drunk and wide awake at 2am i decided to watch homeboy, mickey rourkes self referential late 80s boxing flick, seemed rather rubbish at that time of the night even though i like mickey
 
Can you really top "Plan 9 From Outer Space". A cult classic farce, but lets face it Ed Wood was one of the worst - cheesiest directors of all time. Actually he made even worse Glenn or Glenda.

The Thing with Plan 9, like Glen or Glenda is it's also fascinating to watch. Worst films for me are the ones that bore me to tears.
 
yeah we saw it this evening, real stinker, only occasionally leavened by john c. reillys naural gift for hilarity which was mostly tamped by the writing and direction, and passable singing voice
 
My favorite for worst movie I ever ran into is Braveheart. Certainly worst on the combined cost/ publicity/value scale. Abysmally silly vehicle for Gibson's non-existent taste. Thankful that it employed every excellent British actor and production crew but a terrible bore. I understand that there's an Alexander that can be rated on the same scale but it didn't run long enough here (about 2 minutes after the reviews I guess) to be actually seen.
 
My favorite for worst movie I ever ran into is Braveheart. Certainly worst on the combined cost/ publicity/value scale. Abysmally silly vehicle for Gibson's non-existent taste. Thankful that it employed every excellent British actor and production crew but a terrible bore. I understand that there's an Alexander that can be rated on the same scale but it didn't run long enough here (about 2 minutes after the reviews I guess) to be actually seen.

Being Scottish, I was forced to see this as some kind of national duty as everyone in the land was falling over themselves to praise it. All I saw was unhistorical chest-beating from a man too keen to shove his reactionary, masochistic fantasies in the faces of the audience. Let's say when Gibson revealed himself to be a rather unpleasant piece of work very publicly, I was not surprised. And yes, Braveheart is thunderously tedious if you're not into it.
 
Being Scottish, I was forced to see this as some kind of national duty as everyone in the land was falling over themselves to praise it. All I saw was unhistorical chest-beating from a man too keen to shove his reactionary, masochistic fantasies in the faces of the audience. Let's say when Gibson revealed himself to be a rather unpleasant piece of work very publicly, I was not surprised. And yes, Braveheart is thunderously tedious if you're not into it.

Ah but it's good to see him wade through rivers of Sassenach gore.
 
My favorite for worst movie I ever ran into is Braveheart. Certainly worst on the combined cost/ publicity/value scale. Abysmally silly vehicle for Gibson's non-existent taste. Thankful that it employed every excellent British actor and production crew but a terrible bore. I understand that there's an Alexander that can be rated on the same scale but it didn't run long enough here (about 2 minutes after the reviews I guess) to be actually seen.

I've met several people, over the years, in Aberdeen who thought that it was a documentary
 
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