- Joined
- Jul 19, 2004
- Messages
- 29,622
- Location
- Out of Bounds
Preface: Predilections & perceived obligations of farm families in that era
I need to explain my own background to illustrate what came to strongly resonate within me in relation to the Kelly / Hopkinsville scenario.
Both sides of my family were one generation removed from full-time farming, yet still connected to older forebears still living on the 'ancestral' lands. My parents' generations on both sides had grown up in a full-time farming environment during the Depression. Both grandfathers started out as full-time farmers. My maternal grandfather remained so the rest of his life. My paternal grandfather eventually transitioned to blue collar employment, but continued to live on the land that had been his farm - land that was subdivided so his four children (the entire paternal side) would live in one place as his and each others' neighbors. This is where I grew up.
In the southern farm culture there was a strong perceived obligation to care for one's elders within the family. There were two general strategies for handling this responsibility. The first was to keep the entire family living close enough together to facilitate persistent sharing and caregiving. This was the approach used in my paternal family. My great-grandmother lived out her final years at my grandparents' home next door, and my grandparents' final years were stewarded by my parents, aunts and uncles who lived next door to them.
The second strategy was for at least one child to be more or less assigned to care for an elder as a live-in caregiver / helper in the elder's own home (usually the children's original home). This was the strategy used in my maternal family. A single unmarried aunt lived with my maternal grandfather and took care of the farm and household tasks. Her siblings subscribed, so to speak, by sending her money from their scattered locations - in effect paying her to be a dedicated helper / caregiver.
I apologize for this temporary and sentimental tangent, but it's necessary to set the context for what I believe was a hellward road originally paved with good intentions.
I need to explain my own background to illustrate what came to strongly resonate within me in relation to the Kelly / Hopkinsville scenario.
Both sides of my family were one generation removed from full-time farming, yet still connected to older forebears still living on the 'ancestral' lands. My parents' generations on both sides had grown up in a full-time farming environment during the Depression. Both grandfathers started out as full-time farmers. My maternal grandfather remained so the rest of his life. My paternal grandfather eventually transitioned to blue collar employment, but continued to live on the land that had been his farm - land that was subdivided so his four children (the entire paternal side) would live in one place as his and each others' neighbors. This is where I grew up.
In the southern farm culture there was a strong perceived obligation to care for one's elders within the family. There were two general strategies for handling this responsibility. The first was to keep the entire family living close enough together to facilitate persistent sharing and caregiving. This was the approach used in my paternal family. My great-grandmother lived out her final years at my grandparents' home next door, and my grandparents' final years were stewarded by my parents, aunts and uncles who lived next door to them.
The second strategy was for at least one child to be more or less assigned to care for an elder as a live-in caregiver / helper in the elder's own home (usually the children's original home). This was the strategy used in my maternal family. A single unmarried aunt lived with my maternal grandfather and took care of the farm and household tasks. Her siblings subscribed, so to speak, by sending her money from their scattered locations - in effect paying her to be a dedicated helper / caregiver.
I apologize for this temporary and sentimental tangent, but it's necessary to set the context for what I believe was a hellward road originally paved with good intentions.