Disturbing dream: nightmare or visit from a spirit?

[Anonymous]

I often have vivid dreams where loved ones, acquaintences, and even pets that have died come to visit me: In my dream, I know that they are dead and for some reason are able to come around as though they were alive. It never seems odd to my dreaming self, and the dreams are usually positive, nice and comforting. ( When my grandparents died my dream involved seeing them walk towards my house from the cemetary, meet me in the road, give me a hug, and telling me to be good for my Mom who was understandably shaken with grief ).

I used to work in a day program for adults with severe developmental disabilities, and though most were profoundly mentally retarded one of my clients was a young, quite pretty lady who although was of normal intellegence was hindered by a body so crippled with cerebral palsy she couldn't really move.

Her eyes were so expressive that it was obvious she had more personality than most able bodied people I know, she was also boy - crazy (like me) and girly - girly (also like me - she loved for me to fix her hair and makeup and to look at fashion mags with me).
After several years of the progressive worsening of her CP, and loss of her personality and joy (at the end she was always crying), she mercifully passed away in her sleep.
The other night I had one of those vivid dreams of her - she came to visit all of the nursing staff, we were all at a big table, and she was telling us all about all the stuff she wanted to express in life, and now could since she wasn't bound by a broken body.

However, when she got to the subject of me, she told me how much she couldn't stand me, I was always looking at myself in the mirror, and flirting with male staff while neglecting her! Now, although I can be vain and did flirt a bit, she was never neglected by me. I was one of the only nurses to spend good quality time with her.
There is a school of thought that these dreams are actual contact from the dead, and though they always feel like it to me in a way I can't explain, I hope this was just a bad dream! Opinions, please? ( Sorry post is so long!)

 

[Anonymous]

Sometimes a dream is just a dream.....

had to be, you said her eyes were expressive and she responded to you and showed enjoyment. Those things wouldn't have been so obvious if she didn't like you, would they?

 

[Anonymous]

Thanks for the reassureance; but I almost never have vivid dreams, and they rarely even make sense. This dream sure felt real - as real as any other in which I talk or interact with someone who's dead.

Maybe I'm not so quick to discount this experience as just a dream because that would mean discounting all the others of this nature I've had as just dreams; as I said before they were on a whole extremely comforting before this, and I guess there is a little part of me that wants to believe in their authenticity.

If anyone would understand my vanity and flirting, I think it would be her...and I was probably still feeling the affect of guilt I had due to some flirting I engaged in gone horribly wrong (and in hindsight way too far).

This dream was greatly comforting in that she seemed so content and wasn't so grotesquely physically limited - until she said her piece to me, causing me to wake up crying!

 

[Anonymous]

Hey there.

It sounds like, and many people will probably argue this, that she didnt dislike you, but probably was jelous of you. 'Sleeping Contact' is one the most vivid ways to recall experiances, and relize your own fears. This would explain why you dreamt that she didnt like you.
On the other hand, it has been documented that many people who see 'Ghosts' seem to have a connection with their lifestyle, as u obviously did.
Anyway, i wouldn't worry about it to much, chances are that is was just a dream......

 

[Spookyangel]

It sounds to me like you have had dreams that were "visits" of some sort before, and you're muddling this one up with them since it was about a person you knew who had died. She wouldn't have wanted you near her so much if she disliked you, I'm sure of that.

 

[Anonymous]

Although in healthier and happier times for her it was apparent that she took to me, but the last few years of her life were so painful that she never responded positively to anyone or anything (although there were varying degrees of this). She did at least seem calm when I worked with her; she was in obvious distress most of the time but I always did my damndest to try and take her mind off of her pain. It was only barely possible.

She was non-verbal, though I never pesonally found it hard to figure out how to communicate with her, but maybe I did misunderstand her. Then again, with my experiences working in the nursing field I'm usually right on about the ways patients see me, and I am mindful enough to realize when I'm disliked.

I guess what I'm trying to get to is that if my other dreams involving the dead were visits , this was, too. I really feel that these dreams do involve a contact, although I can't explain how, but after having one I wake up full aware of what had happened . It's just undeniable. But I know that I did more for her than most, and I truly loved her, and I'll leave it at that. Can't please everyone all the time.

 

[Pete Younger]

Having read your story, I really do believe it was just a dream, perhaps something to do with self doubt, but if you still think it was a message from beyond the grave why not contact a medium, it might put your mind at rest.

 

[Anonymous]

I guess what I'm trying to get to is that if my other dreams involving the dead were visits , this was, too. I really feel that these dreams do involve a contact, although I can't explain how, but after having one I wake up full aware of what had happened .

4youblue, there is another way of looking at this which doesn't involve dismissing your vision as just a bad dream. It is quite possible that the girl really did visit you in your dream but your mind warped her message - overriding her words with your own fears. Just think how easy it is to misunderstand or misinterpret things you hear when you are awake, let alone fast asleep !

Best wishes,

Dashwood.