Flatulence Deodouriser: Proven Effective in Gulf War

[OneWingedBird]

The article's formatting is rather erratic after a cut & paste, so maybe easier to read on the site.

http://www.flat-d.com/


Take Back Your Life Again! - No Need to Remain Trapped in Your Home!
Now you can go out in public without fear of embarrassment due to the odor of excessive intestinal gas - FLATULENCE - caused by any reason or condition! Say Good-bye to excess gas odor -PERMANENTLY! Live Life Again!

People who use The Flatulence Deodorizer for the first time say:
"Oh my God this really works!"

"This has changed my life"

"Finally, I have the freedom to go out in public without embarrassment"



Introducing the FLAT-D ™ or the Flatulence (gas) Deodorizer ™ (U.S. Patent #6,313,371).

It is the first REALISTIC solution to an age-old problem:
High Tech Activated Charcoal Cloth- Absorbs all odors
Thin (1/16th of an inch), Flexible, and Lightweight pad
Reusable (washable)
Immediate application and results
Economical
Safe for skin (hypoallergenic material & tape)
Comfortable and thin (you are virtually unaware of its presence)




MATERIAL PROVEN IN GULF COMBAT! LIVES DEPEND ON IT!

REVOLUTIONARY Material was developed for the British Chemical Defense Establishment for use in chemical warfare suits protecting soldiers from nerve gas and other toxic vapors. Activated Charcoal Thread absorbs all odors when worn correctly. People say, "Oh my God, this really works!" TECHNOLOGY

Who Needs The Flatulence Deodorizer ™ ?

The Flatulence Deodorizer™ can benefit people of all ages - Including Children!
If You or Anyone You Know Suffer from:
Colitis
Celiacs Disease
Crohn's Disease
Diabetes
IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome)
IBD
AIDS/HIV (and related conditions)
Malabsorptive Syndromes
Lactose Intolerance
Or any other dietary or medical conditions

If you take medications such as:
Antiviral
Antibiotics
Cholesterol lowering medications
Protein Supplements

If you've answered "YES" to any of the above questions - FLAT-D Innovations can offer you a better quality of life, with our patented Flatulence Deodorizer ™. All of the above conditions and the medications that you take for that condition can cause excessive gas (Flatulence).

No Change to Your Lifestyle - But it Will Change Your Life!
The Flatulence Deodorizer™ does not require a change of diet, use of supplements or medications. This Product works - GUARANTEED! You will have the freedom to go out in public and live your life - Embarrassment Free! The Flatulence Deodorizer ™ works with your current wardrobe. Placed inside the undergarment, underwear, underpants with tape. Does require brief style underwear. No special pants or rubber over garments.Testimonials

Next Day Shipping
Product normally shipped out of our factory the next day after you place your order. If The Flatulence Deodorizer ™ cannot ship within 24 hours, we will immediately notify the customer!

Durable, Reliable and Reusable
The Flatulence Deodorizer ™ is durable and can be reused many times after hand washing. The material is resistant to wear, rubbing, tearing and staining. When easily positioned properly in the undergarment with the supplied tape, it stays in place and does not shift, ensuring comfort and effectiveness. Instructions

Satisfaction Guaranteed or Your Money Back!
Oh my God, this product really works! You will be 100% satisfied or we will refund the purchase price (less shipping and handling). We are so confident that this product will meet all your expectations and End Your Embarrassment from odors associated with Flatulence - Forever, that we Guarantee it! Feel Confident going out in public again. The Flatulence Deodorizer ™ is inconspicuous. No one will know you are wearing it. Say Good-bye to intestinal gas odor once and for all - GUARANTEED! Live Life Again! Links

Low Cost
Revolutionary Flatulence Deodorizer ™ is low priced for your benefit. Products which can't compare to The Flatulence Deodorizer ™ quality, portability, and effectiveness, cost at two to three times as much.

Reusable and Long Lasting
The Flatulence Deodorizer ™ is reusable. Depending on use, some customers say it will last 2 to 4 weeks, normally a minimum of 10 hand washings. Many customers say they get many more uses from their Flatulence Deodorizer ™. Use everyday. Use it constantly, or only when needed!

The Flatulence Deodorizer ™ will increase your self-esteem and confidence, giving you a "Better Quality of Life".
Doctor Recommended


"You Don't Have To Be Embarrassed Anymore!"



No Drugs or Medications !!! No Special Clothes !!!

THE FLATULENCE DEODORIZER is insurance against embarrassment!!! (Gary, Buffalo Grove, IL)

"This product really works"!!!
(Jane, Cedar Rapids, IA)

(Ostomy Customer) "It really helped eliminate the unpleasant odors and the embarrassment"
H.Mitsunaga,Honolulu,HI).
(Click here for Ostomy products and testimonial)


Technology has prevailed over smell!!!

Personal product technology has introduced odor control for your armpits, feet, body and mouth to name a few. These products were all created from peoples concern and desire to control their body odors. They did not want to be deliberately inconsiderate to others. Now is the time for groin odor control.
The Flatulence Deodorizer™ is a real solution to a real problem.

Try it, you'll like it (so will the others around you).

THE COMPANY
FLAT-D ™ Innovations is a family-owned business incorporated in the State of Iowa in 2002. We manufacture in Iowa and Hawaii. We have a 5- Star rating with Yahoo Stores because of our very high customer service reports they compiled from our customers. We have nearly an excellent rating by our customers for the functioning of our products and for our customer care.
***We are now a FDA registered company which assures your safety. Additionally we are registered with the Better Business Bureau (BBB).
© 2003 FLAT-D ™

 

[Anonymous]

Activated Charcoal is used alot, particularly in military applications, to absorb gases and vapours.

I once had a pair of trousers I bought from an army surplus store, they were one-half of a chemical warfare outfit, having a charcoal lining.

I wore them to a club once, I sweated alot, and when I got home and took them off, I had black legs where the charcoal had ran out.
I did not notice whether they worked 'back to front' by preventing others from coming into contact with my gas.

Some years ago, my boss looked into purchasing a 'fart filter' office chair cushion for me, a contraption again using charcoal, and available on the internet.
This was after my stench had reached a zenith, the girl at the opposite desk had to go and physically vomit after taking the brunt of a particularly foul emission one morning.
The 'fart filter' proved too expensive, perhaps I should have kept the trousers for office use.

 

[chris_in_LA]

The 'fart filter' proved too expensive, perhaps I should have kept the trousers for office use.

It sounds like your boss missed a chance to save some money by supplementing the office heating system with natural methane emissions!