Man Attempts to nail himself to a cross

[littleblackduck]

An American from Hartland, Maine, U.S.A. has attempted suicide by nailing himself to a cross. Not a Fortean story perhaps, unless the context of "The Passion of Christ" is taken into consideration.

Apparently he has not seen the movie, nor is he known to have used official "Passion of Christ" brand souvenir nails. In an unrelated story, Mel Gibson may be losing faith in George Bush.

I will be back with a link and the text to this story as soon as I can get them.

Here is the text:

Maine man attempts to nail himself to a cross

By Associated Press



HARTLAND, Maine - A Hartland man was treated at a Pittsfield hospital after he nailed himself to a cross.

The 23-year-old man apparently was trying to commit suicide Thursday evening in his living room, the Bangor Daily News reported.

Somerset County Sheriff Barry DeLong said Monday that no charges will be filed. "There is no crime here," he said.

Police said the man appeared delusional and told them he had been "seeing pictures of God on the computer." He told them he had not seen the hit movie "The Passion of the Christ," which depicts the Crucifixion of Jesus.

Lt. Pierre Boucher said the man took two pieces of wood, nailed them together in the form of a cross and placed them on the floor. He attached a suicide sign to the wood and then proceeded to nail one of his hands to the makeshift cross using a 14-penny nail and a hammer.

"When he realized that he was unable to nail his other hand to the board, he called 911," Boucher said.

It was unclear whether the man was seeking assistance for his injury or help in nailing down his other hand.

Hartland Fire Department members responded, said Boucher, and cut off the wood while it was still attached to the man’s hand. The wood and the victim were taken to Sebasticook Valley Hospital, where the nail was removed.

Boucher said he did not know whether the man received further treatment.

Portsmouth Herald

 

[Timble2]

.

..."When he realized that he was unable to nail his other hand to the board, he called 911," Boucher said......

That was the first thing I wondered about when I saw this thread...how do you nail both hands on?

 

[CallMeKenneth]

Neil did this gag in episode of "The Young Ones"

 

[escargot]

:laughing:
Neil tried it in The Young Ones but could never get the last nail in.

 

[Tyger_Lily]

He really didn't think it through properly did he?

 

[littleblackduck]

Life Imitates "The Young Ones"

I've been interupted about 50 times since I posted this but I was going to point out the "Young Ones" connection. I am a big fan of "zany" British sitcoms and have the DVD boxed set.

I have a theory on how you could get that last nail, but I am reluctant to share it for fear that some mad person will commit suicide that way. A number of friends and acquaintances of mine of committed suicide (one by police--a very small number of suicides, I am glad to say--probably no more than you would expect statistically). I don't want to encourage the beggers.

My motto: don't leave a mess for other people to find and clean up.

This should be posted at all institutions that have to deal with attempted suicides to give the reluctant lifers something to think about while their stomachs are being pumped or their wounds are being tended.

I can sympathize with the suicides, having considered the matter many a time. As Nietzsche says, "Only the thought of suicide has gotten me through many a long hard night."

However, all in all, if I had to die, myself, I would prefer to do it by direct hit with a thermonuclear bomb, 10 megatonnes or so, just in front of a good departure point, say, 1600 Pennsylvannia Avenue. You might as well make yourself useful when you go, or failing that, take a lot of people with you. There is no telling whether being at ground zero would be quick and painless, but it would certainly be dramatic and memorable.

I will be back in a moment with a famous edifying poem on the subject if I can find it on the WWW.

 

[littleblackduck]

On Suicide, by Dorothy Parker

Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you;
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren't lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live.

Dorothy Parker, American writer and Algonquin Roundtable Wit

She attempted suicide so often that her friends had to take her aside and tell her that if she didn't stop it, she would make herself sick.

 

[Kondoru]

this is in bad taste, couldnt the guy wait until Easter?

I say it again and again...

"I do not want any of those effing crap chocolate eggs! give me the money instead!!"

 

[Anonymous]

Well this is off topic but is religious in nature. I was shopping yesterday and i heard this woman talking to another about her church. Then she started talking about how that she is living with this minister and his wife and that she wasn't worried about being single nor were any of the other women as this minister would find them partners and they would all come together in Gods great harvest. Then it sounded like she was talking about one of those mass wedding things. It was really bizarre. I was in the next aisle looking at shoes and silently freaking out. I live in a very religous community but what she was describing was definitely cult like in nature. (I used to live where there were alot of cults so am used to the lingo so to speak). Anyway, not a question but I really wasn't sure where to post this and religous maniacs nailing themselves to a cross sounded as good as any.

 

[Stormkhan]

Long, long ago I remember reading a very morbid but interesting book about crime, death and murder in Victorian England. The section on suicide included plenty of drownings in the Thames, throwing oneself under the hooves of handsom cabs, one chap frying himself to death on a metal bedstead under which he'd lit one hundred candles ... and a spate of self crucifixions. Most nailed their feet then looped their wrists through straps or ropes on the horizontal crossbar. However, one enterprising chap managed it ...

He was an artist-inventor (as far as I can remember) who took considerable time to remove himself from his life of poverty. Nailing his feet to the cross and his left palm to the cross-bar, he picked up a knife and cut a cord then placed his hand in the required position. The cord, weighted down, ran through a series of pulleys and wheels until finally allowing a massive weight to hammer a nail (fixed with sealing wax) into the waiting final palm.

I know ... I can't give source but this imagery stuck in my mind because I thought of the waste of creativity lost on the fellows death. He wasn't upright but at least he got the last nail in ...

 

[Stormkhan]

... He attached a suicide sign to the wood and then proceeded to nail one of his hands to the makeshift cross using a 14-penny nail and a hammer.

So what the heck is a "suicide sign"? "TRYING TO DIE - LEAVE ME ALONE!" ,"POP IN THE LAST NAIL PLEASE" or "AM I EMBARRASSED OR WHAT?"

 

[Philo_T]

Gee nobody's noted yet that some people in the Philippines do this every Easter ?

Of course, this is done in worship, not suicide. Leads one to wonder what the crowds will be like once Mel Gibson's movie hits their shores.

Of course, in my opiniion, these kinds of things overlook the meaning and get hung up on the form.

 

[Stormkhan]

If one is Christian then the symbolism of dying on the cross and possible resurrection (which has roots in Sumerian and Dionysian cults) shouldn't be lost.

It shouldn't also be used as an excuse for self-harm.

Killing oneself by self-crucifixion isn't symbolism ... it's a pathetic attempt to use a reasonable religion for aggrandisement.