Russian Privatises Clouds

[Mighty_Emperor]

Emperor wonders if this is going the same way as Pravda:

Russian Lawyer Privatizes Earth’s Clouds, Plans to Sue for Property Damage

Created: 24.12.2004 17:01 MSK (GMT +3), Updated: 17:01 MSK


A Russian lawyer made his contribution to helping the environment when he announced his privatization of all the clouds in the sky this week.

Vladimir Osipov, from the southern Russian town of Yeisk, showed up at his local notary office in the Krasnoyarsk region with a document affirming his ownership of all the clouds in the air over Earth, the Novye Izvestia daily reported.

“As derelict natural resources originating on Earth, not belonging at this point to any government or person, are my property,” he declared in the document, which he is sending out to the governments of 150 countries.

But while privatization is often associated in Russia with shady schemes to make off with as much as possible before the next strongman takes it away from you, Osipov has privatized the clouds with more noble intentions. He will use his property rights to sue anybody who pollutes the atmosphere.

As the rightful owner, Osipov intends to sue anyone for damaging property that belongs to him. He has no intention, however, to trade in precipitation.

Source

Then again if no one else has done it then why not?

 

[Stormkhan]

Someone must've told him that capitalism is now acceptable in Russia but not explained certain aspects of exploitation, i.e. ownership and financial acumen. I wonder if there's a Russian con-man, pocket stuffed with Roubles, laughing with his mates in the local boozer, saying "I'm so good, me, I sold clouds to this yokel idiot!"

I can't wait for his first claim for money. How many ways, in diplomatic language, can you say "Sod off, you sad little moron"?

 

[Yithian]

Comrades: Join with me in glorious revolt against the capitalist dogs to ensure the collective ownership of the means of [Rain] production! Viva la Revolution!

 

[Stormkhan]

Ownership of atmospheric phenomena must be in the hands of the State which will utilise it for the good of the Proleteriat. Otherwise a bourgeois concept of rain that is free will propogate in the masses.

Now take him out and have him shot.

 

[WhistlingJack]

Perhaps he's hoping to open a (extremely vertiginous) silver mine..?