Re: hillarious.
Piscez said:
From the site:
The Nephilim have been displayed as having large legs which are vulnerable to attack. These creatures would have to have massive elephant like legs to support their weight under the earths gravity. Obviously more than twice what would usually be expected as far as proportioning. Two rows of teeth in both the upper and lower jaw are possibly there to aid in what must be a huge consumption of food for these beasts, also possibly for a gruesome form of weaponry.
I mean, holy shit. I should make up something like this and see if I can get people to believe it.
The physical characteristics section is a hoot! My faves:
The bit about Goliath's armour "..His coat of mail (probably the lightest part of his armor) weighed in at 16 pounds; with his greaves, helmet and target, his armor was easily over 40 pounds and even possibly close to 100 pounds."
Over 40 pounds, fair enough, but where do they get the 100 pounds bit from? They just made it up, that's where from, but it's 100 pounds that would stick in the gullible minds of people who believe this stuff.
More:
"Our research team also considers the Nephilim as the builders of the ancient pyramids whose construction has remained a mystery to this day. All these points taken into account, the Physical makeup of the Nephilim begins to take shape."
Erm, which research team would that be? And based this assumption on what research? Theirs, and none, respectively, but in fundie eyes Egypt was a big evil (otherwise the Exodus wouldn't have happened) therefore impliacting the nephilimin the building of their most famous monument provides further proof of their derilictions. And, simultaneously, demonstrates just how huge and powerful the nephilim were. Again the true believers will be goggling in awe at the terror of this threat to mankind.
They continue:
"Strength, agility, with a propensity for wicked and monstrous acts, the Nephilim will be a great force of evil. The weaknesses of these seem to be few and far in between. Organic in nature, you can expect similarities in biology, i.e.: if it bleeds it can be killed."
Eh?
Finally:
"Also notable here, although not physical in nature, is the fact that the Nephilim have been shown to practice religion. It does not suffice it to say that these creatures are simply an evil mindless offspring of angels and women. They practice treachery of the soul not from a mindless body, but of one who thinks, plans, and acts. The Nephilim are apparently homosexual in nature and have been said in historical documents to practice other abominations such as cannibalism and human sacrifice as well as the drinking of blood."
...and when they were little blew up frogs with a bicycle pump, no doubt. Notice how it's a "fact" that these unsubstantiated creatures practise religion, and that the historical documents to which they refer aren't actually named: perhaps they're thinking of "Jack and the Beanstalk". And, of course, the nephilim are "apparently" gay, just to put the tin hat on it.
But at least it's relatively innoculous at that point: the worrying bit comes later, when they get on to resistance bit:
Also from the site:
The Command and Staff is the leadership arm of the resistance movement. It contains representatives of each sub-unit as described earlier. The Command and Staff of the overall resistance movement is both political and military in nature. The Command and Staffs primary function is to provide clear attainable goals to the resistance movement. These goals may be political or military in nature. The Command and Staff must also insure unity of action among the resistance elements....The commander of the overall resistance movement may be a singular entity or may comprise a group or committee of individuals . More than likely the overall commander is a singular individual either of military or political nature. This commander must at all costs state clearly the political goal of the resistance movement and how he plans on reaching this goal. In effect the resistance movement must establish a mission statement that all members of the resistance understand clearly.
A resistance movement with no clear attainable goals is no better than a band of thugs and brigands and will accomplish little in the way of success. (My italics)
So, having identified an enemy (who are ten feet tall, gay, have elephantine legs, two rows of teeth, and six fingers on each hand and eat people - hey, who hasn't worried about
those chaps?) they set out how they plan to fight them. Never mind that a full scale offensive by mythical beasts would, in all probability, be countered by conventional, legitimate military action, oh no, it will take a load of gun-toting, gospel quoting fundies to combat the nephilim, led by
one person (think Koresh). What if the nephilim come disguised as the FBI? And, as usual in armed fundie circles, any behaviour on their part is fully justified in saving the world from this threat, whether or not anyone has actually seen one, or even remarked on one, for a thousand or more years.
The good lord be praised.
Stu (quite big, so going to avoid Arkansas for a while)
