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Odd Sayings

gatesofcerdes said:
I was reading an article one time about Pink Floyd ( I am an enormous fan, have been since childhood) and the author was talking about Roger Waters who had to stand next to the totally hot David Gilmour "with a face like a slapped arse".
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I've heard 'with a face like forced rhubarb', said of a surly matron.
 
Ulalume said:
Here it's "banging like a screen door in a storm". Or tornado, or hurricane, depending on how hard it's banging, I guess!

Re: "het up" - the first time I heard this phrase was in a British movie, so always assumed it to be a British expression, but some phrases did cross over, certanly. I've heard that "y'all" (which is generally associated with the American South) actually came from the Scottish settlers in Appalachia.
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Now that's interesting about "y'all". I have often heard that in Appalachia speak a more British form of English. There is a novel called "Christy" by Catherine Marshall about a girl who goes to Appalachia to work as a missionary and it talks about the language the people spoke there being close to Elizabethan English. Be warned, though, Catherine Marshall is a religious author, and there's a heavy dose of religion in the book, but if you can hold your nose and get past that, it is an interesting read about the language.
 
Fyass like a bulldog licking piss/vinegar off a nettle. Fyass like a bag of spanners. It's got to be a face it's got ears (said of a particularly ugly baby). Up 'n' doon like a hooers knickers(very uneven paving)
 
Les Dawson had a wonderful line: a face like a bulldog chewing a wasp!
 
Monstrosa said:
Fyass like a bulldog licking piss/vinegar off a nettle. Fyass like a bag of spanners. It's got to be a face it's got ears (said of a particularly ugly baby). Up 'n' doon like a hooers knickers(very uneven paving)
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.. I've also heard face like a slapped arse to describe someone who's miserable looking. When I was a little kid, if I asked my Dad where my Mum was, his reply was "She's run off with a black man" which I think was originally a Midlands saying/joke. He must have realised it was a bit out dated and racist so later changed it to "She's run off with the coal man".
 
We had 'run off with a black man' too. I think the idea was that this scenario was considered so unlikely that Junior'd get the message to mind their own business!

I've also heard 'teeth like a burglar's toolbag'!
 
"up and down like a brides nighty" is one a like - meaning to have gone up and down stairs several times (I think!?)
 
Another Midlands one, which thankfully I haven't heard since I was a child.

If me or me sister ever said "It's not fair!", my mum would say.....


....wait for it......


"What's not fair? A black man's bum?!"

:eek:
 
well if we're going in that direction: ' he was like a fart in a colander' meaning someone who was unsure/couldn't make their mind up, on enquiring of the whereabouts of any child it would be 'i sold them to the indians'-(which never sounded too bad to me imagining the be-feathered native variety for some reason, rather than the (more likely) denizens of the sub-continent.) It was never clarified but stopped further mithering.
Also GatesofCerdes, now that you mention it i remember my Gran using both interchangeably, (maybe dependent on who she was talking to? :))
 
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I've also heard a ditherer be described as "Like a fart in a trance". Vic Reeves sometimes says "A face like a kicked-in fridge door", but he might have made that up.
 
"You can't miss him; he's got a face like a pan of battered farts!"

The response when I asked how I'd recognize the Headmaster. I don't think that Deputy Head liked him. :eek:
 
Not sure if it has been mentioned, but one I often use but am frequently asked to explain is:
"to chance your arm", meaning to have a go, or risk something for greater gain.

Explanation here: via Grammar Monster

"In 1492, two Irish families (the Butlers of Ormonde and the FitzGeralds of Kildare) were involved in a bitter feud over which family should hold the position of Lord Deputy. This tension manifested itself with violent fighting between the two families just outside the city walls.

Realising the violence was getting out of control, the Butlers took refuge in the Chapter House of Saint Patrick's Cathedral. The FitzGeralds followed them into the Cathedral and asked them to come out and make peace. Afraid they would be slaughtered, the Butlers refused.

As a gesture of good faith, the head of the Kildare family, Gerald FitzGerald, ordered that a hole be cut in the door. He then thrust his arm through the door and offered his hand in peace to those on the other side. Upon seeing that FitzGerald was willing to risk his arm by putting it through the door, the Butlers reasoned that he was serious about peace. They shook hands through the hole. The Butlers emerged from the Chapter House and the two families made peace.

Today, this door is known as the "Door of Reconciliation" and is on display St Patrick's Cathedral. This story also lives on in the expression to chance your arm.

A Competing Theory

In the military, rank was worn on the arm. To chance your arm meant to put your rank at risk by undertaking an action which could lead to promotion (if successful) but demotion (if a failure).

"
 
Hmm...The other day, when Novena used the phrase "face like a slapped arse" here:
On not actually being that keen on the old spring
we here at home were trying to puzzle out what it meant. We eventually concluded it must mean sunburned or having damaged skin from sun exposure. We were a bit depressed by this, because in this climate with a strong sun, it's difficult not to have faces "like a slapped arse".

But reading this thread now, I'm beginning to think it means something different....:p

I don't hear many expressions meaning ugly, pretty or anything like that, so it might not be a common thing here to mention people's appearances. But I did hear a friend from Waco say this once about her son's girfriend:
"the poor girl, bless her heart - she's as sweet as pie, but she done fell out the ugly tree."
 
Ulalume said:
Hmm...The other day, when Novena used the phrase "face like a slapped arse" here:
On not actually being that keen on the old spring
we here at home were trying to puzzle out what it meant. We eventually concluded it must mean sunburned or having damaged skin from sun exposure. We were a bit depressed by this, because in this climate with a strong sun, it's difficult not to have faces "like a slapped arse".

But reading this thread now, I'm beginning to think it means something different....:p

I don't hear many expressions meaning ugly, pretty or anything like that, so it might not be a common thing here to mention people's appearances. But I did hear a friend from Waco say this once about her son's girfriend:
"the poor girl, bless her heart - she's as sweet as pie, but she done fell out the ugly tree."
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Yeah, I've heard that one too, only with "and hit every branch on the way down."
ETA: pretty as a speckled pup under a cabbage leaf. Meant as a compliment.
 
I've always used the "slapped arse" reference to mean someone reddening with anger or embarrassment. It's nearly always used to describe a person who's either come off worse in a verbal conflict or been riled by another's actions.

My favourite saying related to unfortunate facial characteristics, was first heard from a slightly posh Glaswegian lady, in reference to her new daughter-in-law. "She's got a face you'd never get tired of slapping".
 
My missus still says "Shut the back door!" occasionally as an expression of surprise ... not because I've left the back door open before some wit asks ;)
 
A very odd saying I just remembered my dad saying was "full as a quilkin" meaning to be full after eating. Also, one my grand mother used was "...eats like a hunter" :)
 
Ulalume said:
Hmm...The other day, when Novena used the phrase "face like a slapped arse" here:
On not actually being that keen on the old spring
we here at home were trying to puzzle out what it meant. We eventually concluded it must mean sunburned or having damaged skin from sun exposure. We were a bit depressed by this, because in this climate with a strong sun, it's difficult not to have faces "like a slapped arse".

But reading this thread now, I'm beginning to think it means something different....:p
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Hehe. Yes, I use that phrase all the time, meaning someone who looks miserable but in a sort of petulant way rather than depressed. I suppose thinking about it it does make more sense to mean someone who's sunburned or angry! :D

The phrase mentioned earlier about "banging like a shit-house door" reminded me of a similar line from an episode of Blackadder 2. Describing Percy's new love, Blackadder says that according to rumour she "goes like a privy door when the plague's in town". And her name? "Jane 'Bury Me in a Y-Shaped Coffin' Harrington" :D
 
Just read one on Facebook -

'It's better to shit your pants than die of constipation!'

As said to a young man by his father, when the lad wondered if she should ask a girl out.
 
In TX, a really bad smell can "Gag a maggott (or a buzzard) off a sh*twagon. Do you ever get so angry at someone you could "tear off their head and sh*t down their neck"?
Sorry if these have already been mentioned, but it's late so I've read only the last six pages.
 
GerdaWordyer said:
In TX, a really bad smell can "Gag a maggott (or a buzzard) off a sh*twagon. Do you ever get so angry at someone you could "tear off their head and sh*t down their neck"? ...
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I've heard "would gag a maggot" (without the sh*twagon bit) to describe something really foul going back at least as far as the 1970's. I'm not certain whether I first heard it in Tennessee, Michigan, or Minnesota.

I don't think I've heard the "gag a buzzard" variant.

I also recall the "tear off his / her / their head ..." saying, but I don't think I've heard anyone use that one since maybe the 1980's.
 
EnolaGaia said:
I also recall the "tear off his / her / their head ..." saying, but I don't think I've heard anyone use that one since maybe the 1980's.
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Doesn't R. Lee Ermey (as the drill sergeant) use it in the film Full Metal Jacket?
 
I believe he says "wipe that stupid looking grin off your face or I will gouge out your eyeballs and skull-fuck you!".
 
CarlosTheDJ said:
I believe he says "wipe that stupid looking grin off your face or I will gouge out your eyeballs and skull-fuck you!".
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He says that too, Mr Ermey was very creative (he supposedly made up most of his dialogue himself), but doesn't he mention the head tearing off and neck defecation insult as well? Haven't seen it in ages, I must admit.
 
GNC said:
He says that too, Mr Ermey was very creative (he supposedly made up most of his dialogue himself), but doesn't he mention the head tearing off and neck defecation insult as well? Haven't seen it in ages, I must admit.
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According to IMDb (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0093058/quotes), there's somewhere in _FMJ_ where Ermey's character says:

You best unfuck yourself or I will unscrew your head and shit down your NECK!
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There you go! The memory's not gone yet. Many thanks.
 
If something was dirty my Grandmother used to say it was 'As black as Hell's fire-back.' If a room was untidy, it was like 'Rammy's Ranch.' Never found out who Rammy was.
 
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