Weird Sex

[GNC]

Was listening to the latest Adam Buxton Podcast tonight with guest Raven Smith, and the matter of that Hawaiian accidental nuclear missile attack alert came up, which erroneously gave the locals six minutes to live a couple of years ago.

The weird thing was, when the alert was announced, online the site showing a huge spike in visitors was Pornhub. Which apparently means most people would like to spend their last six minutes on Earth masturbating. Don't remember seeing that in all that apocalypse fiction.

 

[JamesWhitehead]

Adam Buxton Podcast

I have not kept up with his career but I do recall that his production company was responsible for an engaging history of pornography, made for Channel 4.

It was the more ancient bits that engaged me, jaw properly dropping, when the Parisian brothel speciality of avisodomy was depicted in a supposed contemporary fillum. It was edited, needless to say.

Worse things are done, on an industrial scale, in the name of farming, alas, but we still buy eggs.

 

[GNC]

I have not kept up with his career but I do recall that his production company was responsible for an engaging history of pornography, made for Channel 4.

It was the more ancient bits that engaged me, jaw properly dropping, when the Parisian brothel speciality of avisodomy was depicted in a supposed contemporary fillum. It was edited, needless to say.

Worse things are done, on an industrial scale, in the name of farming, alas, but we still buy eggs.

There was a compilation of early 20th Century porn called The Good Old Naughty Days, might still be available on DVD. Didn't feature chicken "fun", but it was banned by the BBFC for showing a little dog enthusiastically licking away at the human genitals of both sexes.

Reminded me of the old joke, where a young man goes over to meet his girlfriend's parents, and conversation dries up quickly, leaving them contemplating the family dog licking its balls. "I wish I could do that!" quips the young man nervously. "Give him a biscuit and maybe he'll let you," replies the father.

 

[Spudrick68]

I've just finished reading a book about death row prisoners and their final hours. The book is largely anti-death penalty. The author, who as part of the Texas prison system, had to note every fifteen minutes what the prisoner was doing.

She said that she was creative with her descriptions as she didn't want to write that some were furiously masturbating.

Am I the only person who learnt that irrumatio was a word?

 

[Frideswide]

Am I the only person who learnt that irrumatio was a word?

At least two of us

 

[pandacracker]

And me!

 

[escargot]

Am I the only person who learnt that irrumatio was a word?

What, like when cows have all those stomachs so they can chew the grass up later?

 

[escargot]

It's the Realdolls again! You just can't keep those girls down.

A very interesting read from from t'Guardian; a female reporter, Tracy Clark-Flory, visits the Realdolls factory in the context of research into how straight men feel about sex and intimacy.
(SFW)
What I learned about male desire in a sex doll factory

If we look at it closely and with compassion, male desire is more complicated than most people assume it to be.

 

[Swifty]

I didn't know men can ejaculate after death .. lovely ..

Morgue worker arrested after giving birth to a dead man's baby ..

https://worldnewsdailyreport.com/mo...8qaui4c8YMpLwaQPdtzEoJ4z1_3CMpB-nUjfnnwa3CaP4

 

[JamesWhitehead]

I didn't know men can ejaculate after death

Bloody Hell! Mr Swifty, I think you have posted the most WTF thing yet!

 

[Swifty]

Bloody Hell! Mr Swifty, I think you have posted the most WTF thing yet!

Grim isn't it. I hope the kid never finds out.

Post mortem sperm retrieval (the more conventional legal method) ..

https://mosaicscience.com/story/post-mortem-sperm-donation/

Apparently the descriptive name for a dead man's erection is 'angel lust'.

 

[Gene Hunt73]

I didn't know men can ejaculate after death .. lovely ..

Morgue worker arrested after giving birth to a dead man's baby ..

https://worldnewsdailyreport.com/mo...8qaui4c8YMpLwaQPdtzEoJ4z1_3CMpB-nUjfnnwa3CaP4

But doesn't the stuff have to be warm or at least a certain temperature to be of any use?
Oh forget it..
I wish my local would hurry the fu*k up and open or at least start serving substantial meals..

 

[GNC]

Your local... morgue?!

 

[Swifty]

But doesn't the stuff have to be warm or at least a certain temperature to be of any use?
Oh forget it..
I wish my local would hurry the fu*k up and open or at least start serving substantial meals..

I had to research this out of morbid fascination and one link states sperm can still be alive up to and including 30 hrs after a man has died. The first time this was done was in 1999.

 

[hunck]

Hmmm... Worldnewsdailyreport.com - I can't say for sure it's total bollocks but here's some other completely true stories from the site:

NYC: Female bus driver crashes into tree while attempting to give herself a cunnilingus

Woman sues Samsung for $1.8M after cell phone gets stuck inside her vagina

Texas man admits kidnapping 79 people to anally probe them while disguised as an alien

Hurricane Delta blasts 200-ton whale 400 miles off coast of Louisiana in middle of Arkansas farm

Florida fisherman lost at sea for 14 days claims he was sexually assaulted by mermaids

 

[JamesWhitehead]

Worldnewsdailyreport.com

I think that settles that!

 

[IamSundog]

I didn't know men can ejaculate after death .. lovely ..

Well sure! Don’t you listen to The Rolling Stones?

whoa whoa...you make a dead man come
whoa whoa...you make a dead man come
(Start Me Up)

 

[escargot]

I didn't know men can ejaculate after death .. lovely ..

Morgue worker arrested after giving birth to a dead man's baby ..

https://worldnewsdailyreport.com/mo...8qaui4c8YMpLwaQPdtzEoJ4z1_3CMpB-nUjfnnwa3CaP4

I've ahem come across this before: it's bollocks, in every sense.
Here's Snopes* on the subject -

Was a Morgue Worker Arrested After Giving Birth to a Dead Man’s Baby?

Although the news media occasionally report real cases of workers or interlopers at mortuaries/cemeteries attempting to engage in sex with bodies of the deceased, this item about a female mortuary worker’s becoming pregnant through such an activity is not one of them.

It was a spoof from the Dead Serious News site, whose “About” page notes that “Dead Serious News is a satirical website that is updated on an irregular basis. With the exception of the names of public figures, all names are fictional.”

*Snopes is the lomg-established go-to rumour debunking site. I never leave home without it.

 

[Swifty]

I've ahem come across this before: it's bollocks, in every sense.
Here's Snopes* on the subject -

Was a Morgue Worker Arrested After Giving Birth to a Dead Man’s Baby?



*Snopes is the long-established go-to rumour debunking site. I never leave home without it.

Good spot, it never occurred to me to check Snopes. Love the fake name The Mourning Glory Mortuary.

 

[escargot]

Good spot, it never occurred to me to check Snopes. Love the fake name The Mourning Glory Mortuary.

I don't believe a word I read online until I've checked it out on Snopes.
They've got you covered.

 

[uair01]

Again from my favorite economics blog:

If you're curious about the love life of Adam Smith, of economics fame:

https://marginalrevolution.com/marg...ty-a-short-history-of-adam-smith-in-love.html

The author devotes his full scholarly attention to the mystery of Adam Smith’s love life by carefully re-assembling all the admissible amorous evidence, by subjecting such facts to critical lawyerly scrutiny, and by drawing reasonable inferences from these sundry proofs. Part 1 of this paper will set the stage by revisiting several intriguing hypotheses concerning Doctor Smith’s sexuality and romantic attachments.

And sex robots:

https://marginalrevolution.com/marginalrevolution/2020/11/the-economics-of-sex-robots.html

Sex robots will emulate a majority women ratio, shifting women to compete for men’s attention by requiring less courtship and commitment in exchange for sex. The long-term ramifications are unclear, especially the way long-term technologies and cultural norms will interact. Perhaps women will discover they have to make the costs of courtship both low and transparent to compete with sex robots. Or, perhaps, new technology could enable women to recombine their genes with one another, making men enamored with sex robots (or men generally) totally redundant.

 

[charliebrown]

According to Cosmopolitan Magazine, one woman in ten hold on to their cell phone and even talk on their cell phones while having sex.

Really ?

That would make me uncomfortable.

 

[Spudrick68]

Not on Zoom I hope.

 

[escargot]

According to Cosmopolitan Magazine, one woman in ten hold on to their cell phone and even talk on their cell phones while having sex.

Really ?

That would make me uncomfortable.

Yup, it hurts your neck.

 

[charliebrown]

Ha ha not on zoom !!

I think phone addiction is very real.

I think my grandchildren never let go of their phones, especially my granddaughter and her girlfriends.

 

[Okarin]

According to Cosmopolitan Magazine, one woman in ten hold on to their cell phone and even talk on their cell phones while having sex.

Really ?

That would make me uncomfortable.

ah the real reason why phones have a vibrate alert. Of course now i'm going to be concerned the next time my wife asks me to give her a call lol

 

[maximus otter]

...one woman in ten hold on to their cell phone and even talk on their cell phones while having sex.

They like to keep in touch with their husbands.

maximus otter

 

[mikfez]

Supermarket worker killed 15 chickens by having sex with them
Hull Daily Mail Link
Barbara Webster, prosecuting, said: “He did not like performing the act and said sorry to the chickens after.”
He also admitted having intercourse with his pet dog over a four month period, but said the dog "did not like it and growled and bit him".

 

[RaM]

Bleeding hell that's me done with Colonel Sanders.

 

[JamesWhitehead]

Supermarket worker killed 15 chickens by having sex with them

Is Tesco experimenting with new slaughter methods? I wondered.

It turns out the bugger's day-job is not very relevant, though we could worry, in case chilled chickens might also appeal . . .

His mug-shot is included with the article and I don't begrudge that doggie one bite of him! Or several!

Oddly, the whole messed-up business happened in Accrington, Lancs! The Hull Daily Mail must know what appeals to its readers!