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The Everlasting Mystery Of Teaspoons

Oh mate. Don't talk to me about SSS. (Sock Separation Syndrome). They are like magnetic poles that repel each other. I pick up a pair of socks, walk downstairs with them in my hand, sit down to put them on - I've only got one in my hand. Go back upstairs and the other one is on the bedroom floor. I suppose the only way to stop it is to 'ball each pair up'. But that doesn't work with the washing machine or tumble dryer issue. Anyway, they're not spoons, so - rant over - back to the spoon problem....
It is closely related to the spoon issue though. I carry my laundry downstairs to put it in the washing machine, usually bundled up in the sheets. Check carefully as I go for droppage - nope, everything is with me. Open the machine, put laundry in, close machine, set it washing, head back upstairs and....inevitably...inevitably there is one sock and pillowcase sitting somewhere on the staircase.

Household objects hate us.
 
Had ice cream yesterday - a rare treat.
Served to us in small paper cups with a flat piece of wood to use to eat it.

My son was critical of the wooden spatula type device.
"Hmph".....he exclaimed.
"What someone should do is invent some sort of device that has some kind of small rounded bowl on the end of a little handle so that we could more easily eat this" he said, as he chased small bits of ice cream around the paper cup.
"What would such a device be called?" I asked him.
He paused in thought for a moment and said "A bowl-on-a-stick".
He's only 27.
 
Had ice cream yesterday - a rare treat.
Served to us in small paper cups with a flat piece of wood to use to eat it.

My son was critical of the wooden spatula type device.
"Hmph".....he exclaimed.
"What someone should do is invent some sort of device that has some kind of small rounded bowl on the end of a little handle so that we could more easily eat this" he said, as he chased small bits of ice cream around the paper cup.
"What would such a device be called?" I asked him.
He paused in thought for a moment and said "A bowl-on-a-stick".
He's only 27.
We'll see that lad on "Dragons' Den" soon, I expect.
 
Had ice cream yesterday - a rare treat.
Served to us in small paper cups with a flat piece of wood to use to eat it.

My son was critical of the wooden spatula type device.
"Hmph".....he exclaimed.
"What someone should do is invent some sort of device that has some kind of small rounded bowl on the end of a little handle so that we could more easily eat this" he said, as he chased small bits of ice cream around the paper cup.
"What would such a device be called?" I asked him.
He paused in thought for a moment and said "A bowl-on-a-stick".
He's only 27.
I expect that someone has a patent on sticks.
 
Had ice cream yesterday - a rare treat.
Served to us in small paper cups with a flat piece of wood to use to eat it.

My son was critical of the wooden spatula type device.
"Hmph".....he exclaimed.
"What someone should do is invent some sort of device that has some kind of small rounded bowl on the end of a little handle so that we could more easily eat this" he said, as he chased small bits of ice cream around the paper cup.
"What would such a device be called?" I asked him.
He paused in thought for a moment and said "A bowl-on-a-stick".
He's only 27.
Yes I can see the similarities of the 2 generations.
 
This thread reminds me of when my mother was on a jury for a guy accused of being a drug dealer. The only proof the police had was a burned teaspoon found in the yard where the kids played and a scale and aluminum foil found in the kitchen. The guy they arrested was home babysitting his kids and his sisters kids, all under the age of 7 when the police burst in (swat team was involved), held the kids at gun point and found the man with his hand down the toilet. They claimed he was trying to flush drugs but when the plumber came ther were not drugs. It could have been a toy stuck in the toilet, there was a 2 year old in the house.

My mother and all but one juror were furious with the police because they endangered the children. They testified that they knew that at 4 his wife would come home and he would leave the house, but they decided 3:00 in the afternoon was when they needed to arrest him. They tore the house apart and found no drugs.

My mother remembered finding a burned spoon in our front yard after my brothers and their friends were playing, they were not using drugs, they were playing with matches and the younger kids had taken the spoon out to dig with and left it.

Everyone has aluminum foil in their kitchen and my mother had an identical kitchen scale in her cupboard. But the cops really wanted that spoon to be their proof. The jury found the guy innocent, how could they not. They did have one man who wanted to convict him but the rest of the jurors talked him into voting their way, though he was upset, he agreed there were too many doubts and the police's actions seemed dishonorable concerning the children because they knew the children were there and did not bring anyone from protective services with them.
Kids around or not, spoons with scorch marks at the base are usually someone cooking up heroin with a filter and lemon juice to inject or someone cooking up cocaine with bicarb or anomia and water to make crack. I can understand the police's confusion on this discovery. I can understand kids using spoons to dig for playtime fun but why would kids be also using matches to heat the spoons up? ..

I'm going with a theory that some random junkie ditched their drugs spoon in that front yard and that's what the police found.

I've watched people 'cooking up' in my youth and, unfortunately, randomly only about a year ago. I don't use drugs but they trust me because I'm a B-boy (ex break dancer, current pop locker) ... I'm not going to give the 'recipes' here but they destroy lives.
 
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Kids around or not, spoons with scorch marks at the base are usually someone cooking up heroin with a filter and lemon juice to inject or someone cooking up cocaine with bicarb or anomia and water to make crack. I can understand the police's confusion on this discovery. I can understand kids using spoons to dig for playtime fun but why would kids be also using matches to heat the spoons up? ..

I'm going with a theory that some random junkie ditched their drugs spoon in that front yard and that's what the police found.

I've watched people 'cooking up' in my youth and, unfortunately, randomly only about a year ago. I don't use drugs but they trust me because I'm a B-boy (ex break dancer, current pop locker) ... I'm not going to give the 'recipes' here but they destroy lives.
That's what the cops wanted everyone to think, however that wasn't why my mother found a burned spoon in her yard, and if a coke head was cooking what ever it wouldn't be in the yard where the kids were playing. The police had no case. The guy wasn't stupid enough to keep his drugs at home where there a bunch of little kids. The cops were stupid to think he was.

And you must not have ever had kids or been a boy if you can't think of anything a kid would burn in a spoon they found after the little kids went in from digging in the yard.

And is that supposed to be bragging that you mention you used to be a break dancer and druggies trust you and give you their recipes?
 
That's what the cops wanted everyone to think, however that wasn't why my mother found a burned spoon in her yard, and if a coke head was cooking what ever it wouldn't be in the yard where the kids were playing. The police had no case. The guy wasn't stupid enough to keep his drugs at home where there a bunch of little kids. The cops were stupid to think he was.

And you must not have ever had kids or been a boy if you can't think of anything a kid would burn in a spoon they found after the little kids went in from digging in the yard.

And is that supposed to be bragging that you mention you used to be a break dancer and druggies trust you and give you their recipes?
Trust me, I'm not bragging mate. I avoid druggie twats like the plague. I was just unfortunately sometimes in those flats and had to watch it all. I'm bragging about being an ex breaker only though, yes.
 
You butter your cats?? Weirdo.

I'm just thinking about what heroin addicts do with teaspoons. I wonder if Pete's cat needed that spoon to do the same with her catnip?

Since buttered bread always has to land buttered side down and cats always have to land on their feet I fear for the actual fabric of our universe if someone buttered a cat's back and dropped it from a first floor window.

Then again - it might boot us from this sh*tty universe we've been in since the Large Hadron Collider was switched on. Y'know, the one with [...] shrinking Wagon Wheel biscuits and flippin' Covid-19.

Political commentary removed--mods.
 
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Correction.
'Sticks'. 2 of 'em.

Yes, but only after the population of China dropped to eight people at the end of the Great Inexplicable Famine of 1,000 BC - 647 BC.

Statues of the great inventor Zhang “Fuck Me: Rice Needs Two Sticks!” Wei are now universal sights in Chinese towns and cities.

maximus otter
 
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Then again - it might boot us from this sh*tty universe we've been in since the Large Hadron Collider was switched on. Y'know, the one with [...] shrinking Wagon Wheel biscuits and flippin' Covid-19.
We have our own Snailet of Physics to blame for that. :evillaugh:
 

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Since buttered bread always has to land buttered side down and cats always have to land on their feet I fear for the actual fabric of our universe if someone buttered a cat's back and dropped it from a first floor window.

Then again - it might boot us from this sh*tty universe we've been in since the Large Hadron Collider was switched on. Y'know, the one with [...] shrinking Wagon Wheel biscuits and flippin' Covid-19.

Political commentary removed--mods.
What if some sticks toast on a buttered cat? would it just revolve?
 
One slightly odd thing I've noticed about working in kitchens .. whether I've got a kitchen porter or it's me that has to do the washing up ....... you drain the sink and there's almost always a single tea spoon left at the bottom. I've no idea why. It's never a butter knife or a fork.
This is a mystery only a physicist can solve . . .
We have our own Snailet of Physics to blame for that. :evillaugh:
. . . how soon can he start on this case, Escargot?
 
Since buttered bread always has to land buttered side down and cats always have to land on their feet I fear for the actual fabric of our universe if someone buttered a cat's back and dropped it from a first floor window.
Somebody postulated that this might be the best way to invent a perpetual motion machine. It may have been Douglas Adams or it may have been Terry Pratchett. Or somebody completely different.
 
Somebody postulated that this might be the best way to invent a perpetual motion machine. It may have been Douglas Adams or it may have been Terry Pratchett. Or somebody completely different.
Maybe the young Professor on a day-time TV fillum using the quote "there is no certainty in Science" to convince a dubious General to go with her planet-saving plan.
 
One slightly odd thing I've noticed about working in kitchens .. whether I've got a kitchen porter or it's me that has to do the washing up ....... you drain the sink and there's almost always a single tea spoon left at the bottom. I've no idea why. It's never a butter knife or a fork.
That's new. I had TWO teaspoons lurking in the bottom of the bowl when I finished the washing up tonight. Perhaps they have started to divide like amoebae.
 
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