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Ageing & Growing Old

Are you growing older?

  • Yes, I am

    Votes: 82 61.7%
  • No, I'm getting younger

    Votes: 28 21.1%
  • Sorry, I don't understand the question

    Votes: 16 12.0%
  • I'm a Mod; I think adding silly polls to chat threads is pointless

    Votes: 7 5.3%

  • Total voters
    133
Incontinence isn't so bad, compared to other unwelcome 'companions' of old age such as blindness, deafness, circulatory disease and constant pain. :D

I used to 'manage' (others') incontinence in my old jobs. When the person accepts the situation and co-operates with their carers, they usually cope brilliantly. ;)
 
escargot1 said:
Incontinence isn't so bad, compared to other unwelcome 'companions' of old age such as blindness, deafness, circulatory disease and constant pain. :D

I used to 'manage' (others') incontinence in my old jobs. When the person accepts the situation and co-operates with their carers, they usually cope brilliantly. ;)

On the upside it saves having to go to the loo every five minutes in the pub.....
 
I've often thought it would be much more convenient to be catheterised. I get fed up walking up and down the stairs to my toilet every few hours.
 
A mate of mine once went on a pub crawl with a catheter bag full of cider strapped to her thigh. When she thought the bar service was too slow, she'd hoist up her skirt and offer other drinkers a 'warm one'. :lol:
 
escargot1 said:
A mate of mine once went on a pub crawl with a catheter bag full of cider strapped to her thigh. When she thought the bar service was too slow, she'd hoist up her skirt and offer other drinkers a 'warm one'. :lol:

Many years when i had first started work, i went into the toliets and there on the floor was a little grey bag......I was only 17 had no idea what a catheter bag was used for..so i picked it up and had a look inside, luckily when i dropped it none of the brown sludge escaped :shock:
 
I think you're talking about a colostomy bag! I definitely wouldn't drink any cider I found in one of them. :?
 
rynner said:
Eleventy one year old snooker cue stolen:
111-YEAR-OLD SNOOKER CUE STOLEN FROM CAR

09:00 - 23 November 2006
A redruth man had an irreplaceable snooker cue stolen from his car parked in Truro last week.The 111-year-old cue and other items were taken from the back seat of the car that had been parked in Malpas, Truro, overnight.

Darren Brown said: "I can't ever replace it. It was handed down by my grandad. It's 111 years old, hand-made and was a one-piece cue made by Riley. It has sentimental value."

Mr Brown had parked his car while staying at a friend's house only to find in the morning that the passenger window was smashed and his belongings gone.

He said the cue was easily recognisable because it was in one piece and kept in a silver case.

Anyone with information can contact Crimestoppers on 0800 555111.
http://tinyurl.com/y7qmnp


Maybe they should be looking after those eleventy-one-year-old blag ladies.
 
When I was a student in 1967, Sir Francis Chichester completed his round the world voyage in Gypsy Moth IV - I saw his return to Plymouth in May live on TV. He turned 65 during the voyage, and I always hoped that one day I might emulate his feat when I reached that age. (Sadly, at the rate I seem to be falling to bits, that's very unlikely now.)

But to set himself a target for his voyage, Chichester had studied the old clipper ship voyages, and worked out an average time for their passage to Australia. He published the result of his researches in a book, "Along the Clipper Way", published in 1966. Coincidentally (or not!), in that year a pub was built in Falmouth, and named 'The Clipperway'.

As a young man I read several of Chichester's books (several times, in fact), and although I may not be sailing along the clipper way when I reach 65, I can at least aspire to drinking in the Clipperway when I reach that age! And I hope to raise a glass then in Chichester's memory! :D

A couple of other trivial coincidences link me to Chichester: "Along the Clipper Way" was published by Hodder and Stoughton, and I went to junior school in Stoughton, Surrey; and I went to High School in Chichester, Sussex (known to us then as Chi High!).
 
How are you adjusting to your new home?

And I've been dying to ask (hoping not to completely embarrass myself)...

Is your Avatar Terry Thomas?
 
meowfur said:
How are you adjusting to your new home?
Fine. It's just the deterioration in the local bus service that pees me off now - but we may make some progress on that front next Wednesday....

And I've been dying to ask (hoping not to completely embarrass myself)...

Is your Avatar Terry Thomas?

Yep! 8)
 
I heard on R4 news today about Britain's oldest hang-glider. I thought, hmmm, Rynner's found a way to beat those bus queues! :D
 
I've often thought it would be much more convenient to be catheterised. I get fed up walking up and down the stairs to my toilet every few hours.

i had one in for a while after an operation down there. mostly remember finding it incredibly uncomfortable, and the nurses can't get it into their thick heads that it hurts like hell if they accidentally yank it.

best left alone
 
rynner said:
...we may make some progress on that front next Wednesday...

Well, Wednesday has just been and gone! Wouldn't you just know it - you wait all week for one and then two just come by at once! And you miss 'em both!

What happened? You been hassling the local council again? They won't put sails on them! I know. I've asked.
 
Well, I have aged about 10 years in the last few weeks.

I always thought i was unbreakable, but recently I've been broken twice...

now i'm held together by titanium screws and scar tissue.



if you can afford a gun, shoot yourself now, before this happens to you!
 
I was sure age was catching up to me in 2006...

my wife and I separated after 16 years,
I couldn't sleep more than 3 hours at a pop,
my blood pressure and weight were up,
my job sucked,
I felt like an old man at 42...

Suddenly within the last 6 months:
I have moved in with a beautiful 30 year old woman who has
completely turned around my worldview,
I sleep 8 hours or more a night,
my BP (120/80!!) and weight are WAY down because
my new love cooks the healthiest meals I have ever eaten,
and working from home has become a reality.
All at age 43.
My family and friends say I look better than I have in years!

Moral: Never, EVER give up.

TVgeek
 
Been there, sorta, done that, kinda! Feels great, doesn't it! :D
 
we used to have a patrick moore thread at one time, which seems to have disappeared now, but i guess this thread is appropriate for this tale
The Sky at Night enters 50th year

Sir Patrick Moore is to present the 650th episode of BBC One's astronomy programme The Sky at Night, nearly 50 years after the show first aired.
Sir Patrick presented the first show, when he was asked to do three programmes on astronomy in 1957.

At 83, he is British television's longest serving presenter, and still continues his own astronomy work.

But Sir Patrick is furious because the programme has been given what he says is the poor time slot of 0155 GMT.

The series began before the launch of the world's first man-made satellite, Sputnik 1 and the "space-age".

But since it has witnessed the first pictures of the dark side of the Moon in 1959, the Apollo Moon landings of 1969 and the UK's total solar eclipse in 1999.

Many of the world's leading astronomers have appeared on the show, including Harlow Shapley, who first measured the size of the Milky Way galaxy, Carl Sagan and Fred Hoyle.

Astronauts Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin have also been guests.

Without a big budget, the programme has often had to take innovative approaches to explaining our solar system.

It has also had to deal with the problems of star gazing in a country flooded with light.

Sir Patrick explained the show's enduring appeal: "Astronomy's a fascinating subject. You look up...you can't help getting interested and it's there. We've tried to bring it to the people.. it's not me, it's the appeal of the subject."

The Sky at Night: BBC One 0155 GMT, Monday 8 January.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/6238447.stm
 
It' appalling that it's been given such a ridiculous time slot, I'm not surprised he's pissed off about it.
 
Ronson8 said:
It' appalling that it's been given such a ridiculous time slot, I'm not surprised he's pissed off about it.
true.

but it is repeated on bbc4, Mon 8 Jan, 19:30 - 20:00,

and possibly on bbc2, Sat 13 Jan, 12:30 - 12:55
 
Pensioner lured love rival to allotment and shot him
Nicola Woolcock

Men lived at same sheltered housing

Both had dated complex's warden


A pensioner is to be jailed for shooting a love rival at his allotment after the pair became involved with the warden of their sheltered housing complex.
Reuben Bettis, 68, became depressed after Irene Williams left him for Derek Hamersley, a court was told yesterday.

The retired game beater borrowed a shotgun from a friend, saying that he wanted to shoot rabbits at his allotment in Orsett, Essex. He asked Mr Hamersley, 67, to visit the allotment for a meeting to “clear-the-air”, but opened fire on him.

The victim, a retired dock worker, needed surgery after being shot in the stomach. Doctors had also considered amputating his left hand.

At Basildon Crown Court Bettis, known as Lou, admitted attempted murder and possessing a shotgun with intent to endanger life last April. Judge Philip Clegg adjourned sentencing for reports, but said that Bettis would go to jail.

The men had fallen for Mrs Williams, 60, the warden at their accommodation block in Tilbury, Essex. She had been in a relationship with Bettis, which began in late 2005 but it had ended early last year when she jilted him for Mr Hamersley.

Andrew Jackson, for the prosecution, said: “It became plain that he was somewhat depressed at the end of this relationship. Bettis said that he wanted to meet Mr Hamersley for a clear-the-air meeting in order to make sure Mr Hamersley was going to look after Mrs Williams.”

Mr Jackson added that the two men met at Bettis’s allotment while Mrs Williams was shopping.

“Mr Hamersley walked towards the allotments. Bettis was standing by the greenhouse. Mr Hamersley called out ‘Do you want a word, Lou?’ “As Mr Hamersley got to within 9ft or 10ft [about 3m] of the defendant he fired. The cartridge went through Mr Hamersley’s left hand and the pellets scattered into Mr Hamersley’s stomach.

“The first on the scene were other allotment holders. They heard the shooting. They heard Mr Hamersley saying, ‘Help! help! the bastard’s shot me’. They watched [Bettis] turn and walk away.”

Bettis then drove to Mrs Williams’s bungalow and told her what he had done. He was arrested shortly after.

Police found Mr Hamersley bleeding heavily with the shotgun and a live cartridge dumped near by. He was taken to hospital where he underwent emergency surgery for two hours to remove 40 shotgun pellets from his bowel and another 50 to 100 from his hand.

The shooting has left Mr Hamersley’s left hand severely impaired. He is unable to use the fingers, has undergone three operations to remove dead bone and insert metal pins, and needs further surgery.

Roy Brown, for the defence, said that his client denied trying to kill Mr Hamersley but was pleading guilty to avoid a trial. He said that medical evidence showed that Bettis was “in the throes of a major depressive illness” when he opened fire.

In a police interview, Bettis admitted the shooting but said that he had done it accidentally after Mr Hamersley had approached him aggressively. He told police: “If I wanted to injure that man I would have shot him again wouldn’t I? I didn’t even put the gun to my shoulder, it just went bang.”

The judge ordered reports on Bettis’s mental state and background but said that the incident was a “catastrophic lapse by a man in his 60s who had otherwise led a blameless life”.

Bettis was remanded in custody for sentencing on a date to be fixed.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0, ... 45,00.html
:shock:

of course, nothing like that goes on here.... as far as I know!
 
those who think they can remember the 60s may wish to check their memories against this Timewatch:


Timewatch

Fri 12 Jan, 21:00 - 21:50 50 mins

Beatlemania: Documentary which tells the inside story of the rise and fall of Beatlemania, using previously unseen archive footage and interviews with those who accompanied the Fabs on tour.


the Fabs? :shock:
 
How about Eric Idle and Neil Innes's masterly Beatles spoof documentary, The Rutles - All You Need Is Cash? :p
 
For those who feel they are getting old & past it, regardless of their age, consider the following...

My Da is 70 tomorrow, although he's fortunate enough to be asked for proof of his age whenever he tries to get a pensioners discount.
Since retiring 5 years ago he's travelled abroad for the first time since doing his National Service in Germany, he started with Tenerife and recently visited his sister in Australia.
He's gone back to school (University of the 3rd Age) and now speaks Spanish and understands more of how computers work than I do.
His health has actually got better (we both worked in the same factory, and both hated it, but my Da had been there all his working life :( ), half the pills and potions he was on before retirement, he no longer needs.

Death approaches for all of us, we're born, we die, the bit in the middle's called life - and that's the fun part.
 
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