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Worst Movie EVER?

blessmycottonsocks said:
Hope The Mummy scoops the award. Absolutely cringeworthy movie and easily the worst incarnation of the bandaged bad-boy I've ever had the misfortune to waste 2 hours of my life on.
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Just watched The Mummy a couple of nights ago. Enjoyed it well enough. I've seen far more deserving objects of dislike on screen. And I usually can't stand Tom Cruise.
 
ramonmercado said:
Its not a really bad film...
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o_O

Cruise's Mummy was dire! And as for Crowe, it was another career low after Noah.

The Mummy looked like someone had searched the disused vaults at the studio and found dusty, detached chapters from scripts from several genres, then thought, "I know: We'll stitch these together into an approximation of a film, then bribe some megastar to front it. Now, what do we have, let's see: Five pages of a 1970s buddy film, a few leaves from a heist flick, several paragraphs from a war film and a ten-sheet treatment for a mummy movie. I can work with this..."

maximus otter
 
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Hmm....I'd been avoiding The Mummy on the strength of the reviews but I might give it a go now....
 
maximus otter said:
o_O

Cruise's Mummy was dire! And as for Crowe, it was another career low after Noah.

The Mummy looked like someone had searched the disused vaults at the studio and found dusty, detached chapters from scripts from several genres, then thought, "I know: We'll stitch these together into an approximation of a film, then bribe some megastar to front it. Now, what do we have, let's see: Five pages of a 1970s buddy film, a few leaves from a heist flick, several paragraphs from a war film and a ten-sheet treatment for a mummy movie. I can work with this..."

maximus otter
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This is what I thought about it just after I viewed it.

The Mummy: Not as bad as the reviews suggest. A vein of humour runs through the film. This though results in the undead being funny rather than horrifying. There are Knights, lots of Knights Templar but they are all long dead, reanimated by the eponymous Mummy played by Sofia Boutella. Some really good scenes of skeletal Templars swimming underwater in pursuit of Tom Cruise the Tomb Raider soldier. Cruise has a dead sidekick who appears and gives him advice.

There is also Annabelle Wallis as an archaeologist and Russell Crowe as Dr Henry Jekyll (and Mr Hyde), Director of the Prodigium, a Fortean Institute which deals with the Paranormal/Supernatural but specialises in Monsters.

All of these elements don't quite gel together, hence I give it 6/10.
 
The Mummy was basically Indiana Jones crossed with LifeForce, but missing anything that made those films entertaining, even on a bad movie level as with the latter. Apparently Cruise was running the entire show, and was responsible for making it as tediously generic as possible, because you don't argue with The Cruiser.
 
GNC said:
If these arbiters of taste believe Jennifer Lawrence was one of the worst of the year in mother!, then it throws their judgement into serious doubt. She was fantastic in that film, I can't think of another star her age or profile who would have even tried to tackle that insanity and succeed so admirably.
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Exactly! She deserves an Oscar!
 
She already has an Oscar, but yeah, give her another! Maybe she could do a full somersault on the way up to the podium this time.
 
Worst movie ever, you say...?
I may have contributed to this thread in the past, but that's before I saw "Creatures from the Abyss" aka "Plankton".
It's fascinating on a number of different levels, none of them good.
I must warn you, there is nudity, gore, and a woman giving birth to caviar...
It has no redeeming qualities *at all*
 
I just tried "Season of the Witch" and rather think 'Rotten Tomatoes' were overly generous with their 9% rating.
 
My other half and eye ended up watching part of a film while staying in a hotel with cable TV, back in the day when there were only four stations in the uk. Flicking randomly with the remote we came across a scene from a film that we never found out the title of, but has been etched on our brains ever since it was so bad. Set in some sort of subterranean dungeon/ torture chamber people were being chopped to bits left right and centre. A strange deformed who man had just had his hand chopped off and was running around with blood dripping from his sleeve. He showed it to the torturer who took a stick and poked it straight into the mans raw wrist stump! It was some sort of low budget video nasty, but we still say wtf was that film?
 
Warchita said:
My other half and eye ended up watching part of a film while staying in a hotel with cable TV, back in the day when there were only four stations in the uk. Flicking randomly with the remote we came across a scene from a film that we never found out the title of, but has been etched on our brains ever since it was so bad. Set in some sort of subterranean dungeon/ torture chamber people were being chopped to bits left right and centre. A strange deformed who man had just had his hand chopped off and was running around with blood dripping from his sleeve. He showed it to the torturer who took a stick and poked it straight into the mans raw wrist stump! It was some sort of low budget video nasty, but we still say wtf was that film?
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That sounds like an actual video nasty and I'd have thought such a violent film would not have been shown on TV back then.
 
GNC said:
Yeah, I've seen The Room, and I think it's been brought up before here. It's the most sustained piece of baffling dreadfulness I've seen, one of them anyway, but not for the fainthearted. It did spawn one of the most fascinating books on a film I've ever read, The Disaster Artist, which has been made into a film by serial overachiever James Franco. Who is playing Tommy Wiseau. Heaven help us.
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I've just seen "The Disaster Artist" - and that is well worth watching. As for its subject, "The Room", I still haven't had the courage to go through the whole thing.

Oh, Hi Mark!
 
AlchoPwn said:
Has anyone else noticed that this is a new TV Golden Age but a miserable dark age for Cinema?
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I'm finding new films that I like a lot, and not all of them difficult three hour black and white Eastern European drama either. What I am noticing is far more hypercritical complaints from the general audience, often about movies that are perfectly fine.

Great 2017 movies I've seen aimed at the popular audience:

mother!
The Farthest
IT
Wonder Woman
The Lego Batman Movie
War for the Planet of the Apes
 
GNC said:
What I am noticing is far more hypercritical complaints from the general audience, often about movies that are perfectly fine.
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Yes. I've noticed that reviewers have become more demanding, too.
 
For those in Australia, SBS Viceland will have a Season of "The Best of the Worst" movies.

It starts on Wednesday, 7 Feb - naturally with "The Room".
 
Not as bad as Mamma Mia but Kevin Smith's Yoga Hosers is dire .. OK, I'm not a Canadian teenage girl but I doubt even Canadian teenage girls liked it.

We start with Kevin Smith's daughter (Harley Quinn Smith) and Johnny Depp's daughter (Rosa Depp) rocking out in the back of a convenience store Scott Pilgrim style and the jokes fall flat, the 30 year old male drummer also being the girl's point of scorn. Every character seen from now on gets a 4chan type stats page as an introduction. They return to work behind the CLERKS style counter but they're no Randal and Dante. They're also obsessed with social media and glued to their phones and everyone says "aboot" instead of "about" ............. a LOT ............. in case we've forgotten it's all happening in Canada.

There's a 5 minute scene where the girls retrieve their confiscated phones from a cool principle that's quite funny.

Absolutely nothing makes any sense at all, from some token mention of a Nazi past in Canada, a weird little sausage men scene that rips off both GREMLINS and Army Of Darkness without bringing anything new ... and they hang out with a hippy yoga instructor who for some reason they revere (Justin Long) .. and Stan Lee gets another cameo as does Jason Mewes as does Smith's wife, Jen Swalbach .. Hayley whatshisface "I see dead people" gets a needless short scene and Johnny Depp play some sort of hard to explain character ... and the girls giggle inside their own injokes throught all of this.

I thought I was going to hate this before I watched it and I was right (and I didn't want to be), at least I can say I gave it a fair chance, I'm fairly sure Smith and Depp only made this to promote their daughters and because they had some sort of studio deal where they had to make a film or something so deliberately made a shit one ..

 
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GNC said:
What I am noticing is far more hypercritical complaints from the general audience, often about movies that are perfectly fine.
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While I agree with you in principle, the only movie on your list I liked was "It".
You probably shouldn't have capitalized both letters though:
have-you-seen-the-stephen-king-movie-it-what-a-great-movie.jpg


I hear "War for the Planet of the Apes" was good, but I haven't seen it yet. So, is the consensus that we put the hypercritical comments down to bitchy whingeing millennials again? Show of hands?
 
AlchoPwn said:
So, is the consensus that we put the hypercritical comments down to bitchy whingeing millennials again? Show of hands?
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Hmmmm. Maybe not. Critics do get to the advance screenings and generally have a more privileged access to events than your average movie watcher. I’ve seen a fair few fawning professional reviews while the audience tended to diss the whole movie. On balance, i fell into preferring the audience reviews as they seemed more varied but more honest. The professional critic gush tempered with internet hate is a balance I suppose but as usual, you have to ask a critic a) Did you pay for the whole family to see this movie? And b) How did the last movie YOU made go down?
 
jimv1 said:
.. and b) How did the last movie YOU made go down?
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Spot on with that last comment Jim, anybody can make a living walking around criticising others, not everyone can make a film.
 
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